Doppelganger
by attheendoftheday
Summary: It is said that we all have a doppelganger, someone walking the planet who could be our identical twin. What happens when Bella meets the gang 10 years after Edward had his heart broken by hers? AH/AU, maybe OCC. M for lemons, dark references & F-Bombs
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:**** All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I shut off my monitor and pushed back my chair, flicking a glance at the clock on the wall. It was 6:15pm and definitely time to call an end to my third day at Volturi Publishing. Although a little daunting, my new role as one of only three Senior Editors in their new Romance division was proving exciting and challenging. My best friend from college, Angela, had told me about the position and encouraged me to apply for the role. She was currently assigned to their Technical Reference division and had been wanting me to join her at the company since she had started seven years ago, straight out of college.

Angela's help and support had been invaluable, first sharing her experience through the interview and recruitment process at Volturi and then helping me look for and secure my apartment while I was still only able to fly in from Phoenix on the weekends.

I had finally arrived to live here permanently two weekends ago and spent the last week before starting my new job moving in to and setting up my apartment and exploring and familiarizing myself with downtown Seattle. I was already in love with the city.

Tonight I was joining Pump gym that Angela's husband, Ben, had told me about. He received a family and friends discount at Pump through his job at Cullen & Hale Information Systems. Pump sounded just right for me, it was right near my new apartment, advertised state-of-the-art equipment but more importantly offered Hot Yoga classes in the evenings when I could attend. I was hoping that I could put in some miles on the treadmill tonight after missing the gym for the last two weeks.

Grabbing up my gym bag and purse, I hooked my raincoat off the rack beside my office door and walked briskly to the elevators. It looked like I was the last to leave again tonight, probably because everyone else I worked with had a family or actual social life and knew more than two people in all of Seattle.

I saw it was drizzling when I reached the ground level and looked out onto the street and so I shrugged into my raincoat and pulled up the hood, juggling my bags awkwardly. Umbrellas and my hand-eye coordination were not a good mix and so it was a good thing I was happy wearing coats and that I lived in hoodies when I wasn't at work. Stepping out into the light rain I tucked down my chin and hurried the four blocks to Pump.

I waved to Ben waiting for me in front of the gym as I crossed the street towards him.

"Hey Ben, I hope I'm not late." I said, pulling alongside him as we both turned to walk through the sliding doors into the gym.

"No, you're exactly on time, Bella." He replied and then chuckled. "You know it's hardly misting down, you won't melt!" He said, gesturing at my long coat with the large hood pulled forward all but hiding my face and hair completely.

"Ben, I just moved here from the desert! I need time to acclimatize before I'm running around like a local." I laughed back.

"Okay, let's get you signed up." He said, gesturing me forward in front of him. "Oh, are you still coming to dinner on Friday? Angie is really excited that she'll get to talk to someone about books if we all start in on I.T. or Squash. "

"I'll be there on Friday. Angela has made it sound like it's a great group of people and so I'm looking forward to it. It's mainly couples that you work with or went to school with, right?"

"Yeah, you might meet Emmett and Rosalie here tonight. They own this place and were both two years ahead of us at school. Then there's Jasper, Alice and Edward who I work with. Edward and Jasper were in the same year as us in high school while Alice was a year behind us. Emmett, Edward and Alice are siblings and Jasper is Alice's partner and also Rosalie's brother."

"It sounds good, Ben. I might even get to hear some stories about what you and Angela were like back in the day." I smiled.

"You'll probably hear only get to hear college stories about me, the Cullens and Hales ran in a different crowd in high school. And, as you know, Angie and I didn't get together until after she moved back from Arizona after college."

We stopped at the sleek front desk where a busty blonde was smiling widely at us.

"Hey Ben! What can I help you with this evening?" she asked brightly.

"Hi Jessica, this is my friend Bella. She'd like to sign up." He answered and then continued, "Jess, can I give you my membership number and then leave Bella in your capable hands so I can head off?"

"Of course you can, Ben! Bella and I will manage just fine." She smiled at me now.

I looked around the reception area while Ben and Jessica chatted, the wall behind the front desk was white and the wall opposite was plastered with layers of posters advertising concerts, bands and CD launches. Interspersing the riot of posters were spray-painted "Post No Bills" stencils. Across from the front desk was a grouping of low black leather couches around a long low coffee table. Just beyond the desk were two doors leading into the male and female change rooms. On the other side of these doors and before a set of double doors at the end of the room there was a juice bar. The bar was currently deserted except for a tall, blonde woman who looked like a supermodel sitting in front of it on one of the tall stools, flicking through a magazine. She was wearing faded jeans and a snug black long sleeved top that showed off her figure effortlessly. Large windows ran along the wall opposite the bar, looking into a room that was filled with rows of treadmills, elliptical trainers, stationary bikes and rowing machines.

"Okay then, thanks Jessica. I'll get going now." Ben's voice interrupted my exploration. "See you on Friday, Phoenix!" He said to me, using his one of his teasing nicknames for me, and reaching to give me an awkward one-armed hug.

"Thanks for this, Ben. I really appreciate it." I told him. "See you on Friday!"

"Now Bella, can I just get you to fill in this form?" Jessica asked brightly as I turned back to her at the desk. "Then we'll schedule your complimentary fitness assessment and personal training session."

"Actually can I skip the assessment? I am really just interested in signing up for your evening Bikram Yoga classes and using the treadmills and ellipticals. If that's okay, of course?" I jumped in.

"That's fine, Bella. I'll write down your name for tomorrow's 6pm Hot Yoga session, shall I?"

I nodded, "Please." I started scribbling down my details on the form she'd handed me.

"I can ask Emmett or Rosalie to give you a quick tour tonight, if you'd like?" Jessica then asked, gesturing towards the juice bar where the stunning blonde had been joined by two men.

One of the men was huge, maybe a foot taller than my 5'5" height, and with massive shoulders and arms and a heavily muscled chest and back. He was wearing a short sleeved black t-shirt and faded jeans that hugged his muscular thighs. He had one arm around the blonde's shoulders and was holding a black leather jacket in his other huge hand. The other man was tall also, maybe 6'2" and looked leaner but still muscular, wearing a white, long sleeved button down shirt and dark denim jeans. His reddish, brownish hair was tousled and still damp from the showers and he was laughing at something the other guy had said, the sound of his velvet laugh floating to where we stood. The three of them were so beautiful it looked like they had arrived from a different planet, maybe the land of the beautiful people, where we mortals could only admire them from afar.

"Oh no, they're dressed in their street clothes and look like they're ready to leave. If I can, I'll just jump on one of the treadmills tonight and make sure I get shown around before using any other equipment." I quickly muttered, turning away from staring at the three at the bar just as the bronze haired god started to turn his head in our direction.

"If you're sure, Bella? I know they won't mind for a friend of Ben's." She replied. "In fact, the guy on the left is Ben's boss, Edward Cullen, and only _the_ most eligible bachelor in Seattle." She whispered now. "I could ask him to give you a personal to—"

"No!" I interrupted, hurriedly scrawling the last of my details onto the simple form. "If this is all you need, I'll just get changed for my workout." I finished lamely, thrusting the form at her.

"That's all I need, thanks Bella." Jessica replied, watching me closely with a smile that didn't match the expression in her eyes. "I'll enter you into the computer and have a membership card ready for you on your way out. Here's a locker key."

"Thanks." I muttered, taking the offered key before grabbing up my bags and walking quickly to the door of the female change room, my eyes locked on my feet.

Finding my locker, I threw my gear onto the bench and started to strip out of my work clothes. I felt strangely unsettled and just wanted to pound out a couple of miles on a treadmill before grabbing some takeaway on my way home and settling in for an early night. I quickly pulled on a pair of black yoga pants and my faded and worn long-sleeved cotton Sun Devils hoodie that I'd had since college. I sat down to pull on my sweat socks and running shoes, quickly tying the laces in double knots. I finished my lightening change by scraping up my long brown hair into a high pony tail. Snagging my iPod and earphones out of my purse, I scooped my clothes and bags into the locker, slamming the door and pinning the key to my pants at my waist.

Walking back to the door that led out into the lobby, I pulled forward the hood on my top. I'd found at my old gym that covering my hair and obscuring my face discouraged the random pickup attempts from sweaty guys that I dreaded. I stuck in my earbuds and pushed out through the door, scrolling through my playlists to find the perfect music for my work out tonight. As I strode past the juice bar, my head still bent over my iPod, I was hyper aware of the long, dark clad legs in my peripheral vision.

I let out the breath I hadn't known I was holding when I pushed through the double doors at the end of the lobby and shook my head internally at myself. I didn't understand why I was having such a strong reaction to the, admittedly, extremely good looking bronze haired stranger.

I corrected myself then, remembering that Ben had said that I'd be meeting them all at dinner on Friday, the extremely good looking soon-to-be acquaintance, I amended. I sighed, pushing through the door now on my right that led into the exercise room visible from the lobby, at least I would have two days to mentally prepare myself to seeing him again. I walked around the perimeter of the room and found an unused treadmill in the first row looking out onto the street. Climbing onto the machine, I quickly punched the speed up to a brisk walking pace to warm up with and selected my Grunge playlist, it was fitting for my first work out in Seattle.

As I finally started to relax I looked out onto the street and saw Edward, my soon-to-be acquaintance, standing on the street, turned back to talk to Emmett and Rosalie who looked like they were heading in the opposite direction. I studied him more closely now, my gaze moving slowly from his messy bronze hair over his dark eyebrows, down his straight nose, pausing on his red lips split now into a wide smile and then shifting to his chiseled jaw. I breathed in deeply through my nose, feeling momentarily stunned by his beauty. I dropped my head, tucking my chin down to my chest and pretending to fiddle with my iPod, now sitting on the controls just above waist level in front of me, as I saw him again start to swing his face towards mine.

"Get a grip, Bella." I told myself fiercely. I cranked up the volume on my iPod and stabbed the button on the treadmill in front of me to speed up to a fast jog. I shrugged and then rolled my shoulders, shaking off my fascination for the unsuspecting Edward, still standing in front of me as I could see by his lower legs. I forced myself to focus on the pounding of my feet on the rubber track beneath me and the driving music, still looking down at the controls in front of me, until I felt the calmness I was waiting for start to spread.

Tomorrow I would think more about my strange reaction to Edward and how I could deal with it before Friday, tonight I would zone out during my run and go home tired and relaxed and not worrying about why I suddenly felt like a teenager crushing on the bronzed haired, beautiful man that I'd seen for the first time tonight.

**EPOV**

I stared up at the girl running in the window in front of me, trying to penetrate the shadow of her hood to see her face more clearly. There was something strikingly familiar about her but I hadn't been able to catch more than the most fleeting of glimpses of her face. I only had the impression of pale skin, dark hair and a cute nose.

I had first seen her standing at the front desk talking with Jessica; before I could look more closely I had been distracted by the sight of Ben Cheney leaving and had then been called back to my discussion with Emmett and Rosalie about the interclub squash competition starting up next week. When I later thought I felt the girl's eyes on me I'd turned to catch her gaze but by the time I looked she was talking again with Jessica before she'd handed something over the desk and then quickly walked into the change rooms, her face completely hidden by the deep hood on her jacket.

She had walked right past us, not five minutes later, but her face had been turned away, looking down at the iPod in her hand and she'd again covered her head with another damned hoodie. After she had walked past I'd looked up from staring at her ass to meet Rosalie's knowing smirk, she had only laughed at my attempted innocence at being caught ogling, open mouthed at the strange hooded girl's shapely behind.

Turning away from the window now, I promised myself that I'd talk to Ben tomorrow to find out if this was his wife's friend who he'd told me was moving to Seattle. And, I decided suddenly, if Ben did know Hoodie Girl I was determined to arrange an introduction and find out why she seemed so familiar and yet, at the same time, so mysterious.


	2. Chapter 2

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I walked along the street for the third time, worriedly looking for the restaurant where I was meeting Angela and Ben and their friends for dinner. I was already ten minutes late and about to call Angela again when I spotted a couple who could only be Emmett and Rosalie on the other side of the street, walking away from me. I quickly dodged across the road, speeding to catch up with the glamorous couple who were just stopping to walk down a narrow laneway where I could now see the name of the restaurant I'd been searching for discretely written in gray on a plain black board hanging over a doorway about twenty feet further down the alley. I paused at the door of the restaurant, running a hand over my hair and taking a deep breath, I was feeling flustered after not being able to find the place, apprehensive about meeting Angela's close friends and now nervous about meeting Edward who had only grown more handsome in my memory of him at the gym two nights ago.

I breathed deeply one last time before pushing open the door and stepping through into the softly lit, dark paneled room. Looking around I saw that Emmett and Rosalie had already disappeared and so I stopped at the empty hostess station just inside the doorway. I smoothed one hand down the front of my skirt and then tugged on the hem of my blouse to straighten it while I waited for the hostess to return. I heard the door open again behind me just as I spotted a waiflike blonde, dressed all in black and with menus in her hand, walking back towards me.

"Chelsea?" A high bell like voice asked behind me. "Chelsea?" A small hand touched my elbow when I didn't respond.

I turned to see a small beautiful woman with short, spiky dark hair standing next to a tall, lanky man with dark blonde curls, looking expectedly at me.

"No, sorry. I'm Bella." I responded, smiling slightly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You look just like someone I know. You must be Ben and Angela's friend! I'm Alice and this is Jasper." She smiled, now holding her tiny hand out for me to shake. "Hi Lauren, we'll just make our way to our usual table, shall we? Come on, Bella, follow us!" Alice spoke quickly to the waif and then stepped around her, already moving further into the restaurant.

"We'll order our drinks at the bar after I've introduced you to everyone, Bella." Alice continued over her shoulder, almost skipping on her way towards the large table against the back wall.

Moving towards the table I could now see Ben and Angela facing us, already seated beside Emmett and Rosalie. At the far end of the table, seated across from Ben, I could see the back of a head of barely tamed bronze hair and I felt my heart skip a beat. Great, I grimaced inwardly, way to keep those reactions under control! Trailing along behind Alice and Jasper I smiled at Angela as I walked closer not noticing until I had arrived at the table that Jasper and Alice were now standing behind their seats opposite Emmett and Rosalie, leaving me the only free seat next Edward. I placed my hand on the back of the chair as I paused behind it, wondering if I should sit down or go and order a, now, much needed drink.

"Hey Arizona!" Ben called, just noticing me now after being caught up talking animatedly with Edward.

"Hey Ben!" I half laughed and half sighed, he delighted in his nicknames for me.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward turning his head up to me. I prepared myself to meet his eyes without blushing or otherwise embarrassing myself and turned my head down towards him with a smile already prepared.

I gasped instead at his reaction to me. Momentarily he had looked like I had slapped him, a flash of pain passing through his eyes and wiping away his welcoming smile, before his expression had become shuttered. The only emotion on show now was in his glittering green eyes as he glared at me, almost as if he hated me on sight. He quickly turned his face away, his posture rigid and his one visible hand clenching tightly around his glass. I flicked my eyes across to Angela, bewildered at the loathing that I had just seen in his eyes. She frowned back at me and lifted one shoulder slightly in a tiny shrug.

"Everyone this is Bella. Bella, this is Emmett and Rosalie." Alice's voice dragged back my attention. "And that's Edward sitting next to you.".

"Hi Everyone!" I greeted the table in general and smiled across at Emmett and Rosalie. "Can I get anyone a drink while I'm at the bar?" I offered, desperate to step away from the table and regain my scattered composure.

"I'll have a glass of the house white, please, Bella." Angela said, still looking at me with concern. I tried to smile reassuringly back at her and moved my gaze to Ben.

"How about you, Washington?" I teased, "Another beer?"

He laughed and nodded.

"Anyone else? Emmett? Rosalie? Edward? Jasper?" I asked.

"I'll grab another beer too, thanks Bella." Emmett smiled although he was studying me closely.

"I'll have a white wine, Bella, thanks." Rosalie said, looking at me carefully also.

I wondered briefly if my blouse was unbuttoned or if I had pen marks on my face.

"Alice is getting my drink, thanks Bella." Jasper murmured, smiling kindly at me.

Edward still had his head turned determinedly away from me, so I took that as a no for a refreshed drink. Still perplexed at his strong seeming aversion to me, I shrugged internally, deciding to push it to the back of mind until I could ask Angela about it later.

I saw that Alice was waiting for me, ready to move to the bar. I smiled and stepped quickly beside her, happy to get away from the table even if it was just for a few minutes.

At the bar I ordered three glasses of the house white wine and two Black Raven beers and tried to surreptitiously check that my outfit was ok and my face was clean in the mirror behind the bar.

Alice noticed and laughed kindly. "You look fine, Bella."

I grimaced slightly. "Sorry, I just thought I caught a couple of strange looks at the table and so thought I'd better check that I was all buttoned up correctly and that I hadn't drawn pen all over my face at work again."

"It's probably because you look so much like someone we all used to know, sorry." She explained, intently examining my face. "It is really uncanny how much you look alike." She smiled.

"Oh, okay." I accepted, turning to pick up the tray holding the drinks I'd ordered and then pausing to wait for Alice's order to be served.

"Ben mentioned that he works with you, Alice." I said, casting around for a conversation starter.

"Yes, he heads the Development team and I am head of the Design team." She replied and then laughed lightly. "Sometimes we end up at loggerheads when there's a pitched battle between the techo geeks and the design freaks but mostly we get along well." She paused then as she grabbed her three drinks, not bothering with a tray. 

"Jasper and Edwards are the two Directors of the company. Jasper runs the financial and business side of things and is kind of like the Chief Finance Officer. Edward oversees all of the I.T. side of the business and everything that's left, he's kind of like the Chief Information Officer and CEO all rolled into one." She continued on our way back to the table, hardly pausing for breaths.

"Wow, if you don't mind me saying, you all seem young for such senior positions." I said.

She laughed lightly again at that. "Yep, that's the beauty of starting your own company. Well, Edward and Jasper started the company while they were still in college and it just boomed from there. Our parents were hard pressed to get us all to stay in school until we graduated."

We stopped at the table then. Alice quickly stepped in front of me and set down a drink in front of Edward, bending to whisper into his ear briefly before she smiled at me as she returned to her own chair. I set down the tray and passed over Angela's and Rosalie's glasses of wine and Ben's and Emmett's beers before placing my own wine at my place setting.

I quickly walked back to the bar and returned the tray I had used and grabbed two carafes of water to take back to the table with me. I paused slightly about ten feet away from the table, watching the dynamics at play when I wasn't there. Ben and Angela were laughing at something that Emmett had just said to Edward and Rosalie and Alice were talking animatedly with Jasper. I felt awkward watching their easy interaction; it was difficult trying to join such an established group of close friends especially when one of them had seemed to take such an instant dislike to me. I straightened my shoulders and continued on to the table, determined to enjoy my evening and ignore Edward's behaviour as much as I possibly could.

I set the two carafes of water in the middle of the table and slipped quickly into my seat, hurriedly picking up and reading the menu as I saw our waitress standing next to Jasper, ready to take our orders. I randomly selected the first item I focused on, ordering the mushroom ravioli in turn and then closing and handing up my menu. I noticed in my peripheral vision that Edward had shifted away from me in his seat, looking to almost be in danger of falling out of his chair. I lifted my glass of wine to my lips just as Angela spoke to me across the table.

"Bella, I forgot to warn you. The boys will spend at least twenty minutes trying to pitch book ideas so that we will claim dinner on our expense accounts." She said, rolling her eyes playfully.

I laughed. "That's actually good, Angela. My division is looking for new authors." I reminded her.

"Excellent! What division do you work in, Bella?" Emmett asked rubbing his hands together.

"I'm working in Volturi's new Romance section, Emmett." I replied, waiting to see his reaction.

"Oh… I'll have to think some more on some ideas for you." He replied, looking disappointed that he didn't have a pitch already planned out.

"That's ok." I laughed, "You can save them for another night after I've actually received a company credit card so I can even consider picking up the tab."

He broke into a broad grin. "Okay, deal. I'll think of some good ideas for my best selling Romance novel for next time."

"Deal." I agreed, reaching over the table to shake on it.

I sat back and listened to the conversations across from me and to the right of me, joining in where I could and laughing at Emmett's teasing of my Sun Devils hoodie that I'd worn at the gym as he explained that he was very passionate about his college football. I tried to ignore the stormy silence emanating from my left, not knowing what I could do to ease the tension engulfing our end of the table. Ben quietly engaged Edward in a work related discussion after a short while and I exhaled silently in relief hearing Edward's low, velvet murmur and feeling a palpable lessening of the tension vibrating off his body.

Our food arrived promptly and I gratefully forked a piece of ravioli into my mouth, suddenly remembering that I hadn't eaten anything since the muffin I had had for morning tea.

"So, Bella." I looked across to Emmett, chewing quickly and then swallowing to clear the food in my mouth. "Do you have any relatives called McCarty?"

I took a quick sip of wine before answering, noting that everyone was again watching me closely.

"Um, not that I know of… I'm pretty sure there's no one in the family with that name." I said, casting back to what I remembered of my family tree on both sides of the family. "Why do you ask, Emmett?"

"We went to school with your identical twin, that's all. I figured you had to be related because you look just like her."

"Who do you mean?" Angela asked then.

"Chelsea McCarty. She was in your year, Angela." Emmett replied.

Angela then looked at me consideringly just like the rest of the table. She frowned slightly and then shrugged.

"I don't see it, sorry. Bella just looks like Bella to me." She said, dismissing the similarities.

"I've never thought about it," Ben said now, his forehead creased while he looked at me. "I can't even remember what Chelsea looked like now… Well, except for her cheerleaders outfit." He laughed as Angela elbowed him.

"No, really, Bella looks _exactly_ like Chelsea." Emmett insisted.

"I think Chelsea was taller." Rosalie interjected, pursing her lips while she stared at me.

"And Bella's skin is fairer." Alice added.

Emmett considered me some more. "Chelsea wasn't as curvy as Bella, I suppose." He grinned at me then, waggling his eyebrows at me playfully.

I laughed, trying to break their serious contemplation of me. "Great, so you're saying that there is a taller, skinnier and more tanned version of me running around Washington somewhere? She sounds like a real bitch." I joked.

Emmett, Rosalie and Ben laughed loudly at my response and I caught Jasper's quick grin but Alice bit her lip, choking off her own laugh and slightly shaking her head at me, her eyes wide as she looked over my shoulder at Edward. I felt him standing up abruptly, roughly pushing his chair back.

"I'm getting another drink." He bit out before striding off.

I stared down miserably at my plate. "Shit, I'm sorry! I was trying to be funny." I muttered, apologizing to my plate of food, not wanting to lift my gaze to meet anyone's eyes.

"Have I told you how I met Bella at college?" Angela asked the table, quickly changing the subject.

I smiled gratefully at her before looking back down at my plate, absently toying with my ravioli now, my appetite completely vanished.

A long five minutes later, I felt Edward return to the table behind me. After he had sat down I turned my chin in his direction, looking at the table cloth in front of him, afraid to see what he could be thinking of me and apologized softly so that no one but he would be able to hear me.

"I spoke out of place, Edward. I'm sorry if I offended you." I turned my face back to the conversation at the table now; still not listening to anything that was being said.

When everyone else had finished eating and our plates were cleared, I discretely snagged up my purse and pulled out enough cash to cover my meal. I stood up, carefully pushing my chair back.

"I'm going to have to head off, I'm sorry. I still have some emails to send tonight and I have a manuscript the size of the Phoenix phonebook that I have to finish reviewing before Monday." I explained to the table.

I palmed my money across to Angela and then shook the hands that Emmett and Rosalie both offered me across the table. Alice stood and kissed my cheek and Jasper smiled at me.

"It was nice meeting everyone." I said, nodding slightly at Angela when she mouthed 'Call Me!' and smiling one last time around the table, noting that Edward had not even turned towards me to acknowledge my departure.

Lifting one hand in a brief wave, I turned and walked quickly through the now crowded restaurant to the front door.

I breathed in deeply as I stepped out into the damp evening air, glad to be on my way back to my apartment. I did actually have some work emails to send out tonight and the huge manuscript that was my weekend's work was waiting for me on my bedside table. I thought sadly that I probably wouldn't get a repeat invitation to another of the group's dinners. I straightened my shoulders then and wondered if I'd actually accept another invite even if one was offered. It hadn't been the most fun evening I'd ever had. Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper and Alice had seemed really nice and I always loved catching up with Angela outside of work with Ben but I wouldn't want to sit in the vicinity of Edward's stormy company again, an hour was long enough to last me for the next decade, I decided.

I turned out of the alley and started to walk the six blocks back to my apartment. Already planning the grilled cheese sandwich and hot cocoa I'd have at home to stave off my suddenly returned hunger, I shook my head at the strange turn the evening had taken. The man I'd thought would be interesting to meet, after spying him at the gym two days earlier, had turn out to be a moody and vaguely sinister dinner companion that I wasn't inspired to want to get to know any better. I chuckled inwardly then, thinking that even ogling him from afar at the gym had already lost its appeal to me now that I'd spent a short evening with him and his unfair anger towards me. Tomorrow I'd look for a photography club or walking group to join and try to increase my circle of friends in this new city without crashing Angela's established group. I walked more briskly now, happy that I had a plan and eager to get back home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

I watched Bella's back as she weaved though the tables towards the exit, she had left so abruptly that I felt cheated of my chance to voice the apology that was still rolling around my head. I slowly tore my gaze back to our table and saw that Rosalie was glaring at me, Emmett was watching me with sad eyes and Ben, Angela and Alice were all avoiding looking at me.

"Nice, Edward. You can stare at her ass again but you can't say one word to the girl all evening." Rosalie spat at me.

I glared right back at Rosalie, my jaw clenching, but bit back my retort knowing I'd regret anything I said in the mean mood I was in now. Emmett gently placed his hand on Rosalie's fist clenched beside him on the table and she tore her eyes away from mine to smile briefly at him before turning her chin away from me and studiously ignoring me.

I dropped my eyes away from her stubborn profile and noticed Bella's nearly full wine glass on the table next to me. I felt a pang of guilt tighten my chest as I remembered that Bella had barely touched her pasta also even though she had appeared ravenous when it was first set down in front of her. The guilt was quickly flushed away by the small, bitter part of me rejoicing that she may have felt as bad as I had tonight.

OoOoOoOOoOoOoO

I had been looking forward to meeting Bella after hearing some of Ben's stories when I asked him about her yesterday after noticing her at the gym the night before. She had sounded funny and smart and a little bit quirky and a world apart from the women I usually date. I'd decided that I didn't want to get romantically involved with her, despite the strong draw I'd felt towards her at the gym, because of her closeness with Ben and Angela. I'd scoffed internally at myself at even the thought of that then, I didn't get romantically involved in the traditional sense with any woman, preferring to keep my relationships light and casual and fun and skipping the drama altogether. So, I'd told myself, that just leaves friendship with Bella and had looked forward to that even more after hearing more of her and Angela's antics from Ben.

I'd been discussing a new contract that we'd just won the tender for with Ben when I'd first become aware of Bella. I'd felt goose bumps lift on my arm under my shirt sleeve and smelt the faintest hint of strawberries and I must have shifted slightly because Ben had looked at me and then smiled widely at someone standing beside me.

"Hey, Arizona!" He had greeted.

"Hey, Ben!" A soft voice had huffed, exasperation and laughter both evident in her warm, friendly greeting and the hairs on the back of my neck had prickled.

Bella had arrived! I had smiled in anticipation, turning to meet her and froze. Chelsea, the girl I had loved and hated throughout high school, was smiling down at me. I think I had actually physically recoiled from the sight of her before my brain had computed the minute differences between Chelsea, the only girl who had won and then broke my heart, and the woman watching me with her smile frozen on her face and her eyes reflecting her shock at my reaction. I had hated her in that instant, hated her for reminding me of a happy, beautiful Chelsea, hated her for bringing back all the memories and emotions that I had hidden away so long ago and hated her for seeing my vulnerability. I'd abruptly turned away from her, fighting my impulse to flee from the room, and struggled to compose myself and regain control of my rioting emotions.

She had stayed standing behind her seat while Alice made the introductions around the table and then she had offered to buy a round of drinks. She had teased Ben, calling him Washington just as he had called her Arizona, and then politely asked the rest of us by name if we wanted a drink after it was apparent that she was buying one for Angela and Ben. Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper had replied but I had stayed silent, stunned at the sound of my name from her lips, it had sounded so wrong and yet so right at the same time. So wrong because it hadn't sounded like Chelsea saying my name and so right because Bella's soft honeyed voice had sent a spiral of heat into my stomach that had made me want to hear her say my name again.

Chelsea had only ever used my name when she was whining or irritated with me, her shrill voice grating on my every nerve, otherwise she used to call me by an endlessly changing series of saccharine pet names that had made my heart skip when I had believed she meant the endearments and my blood boil when I'd learnt how wrong I had been.

Chelsea and I had started dating in our freshman year of high school after I had finally built up the courage to ask her to a school dance. I had worshipped her throughout our sophomore year and given her a diamond promise ring at our junior prom because my parents didn't want us to get engaged until after we had graduated. We had stayed virgins up until our senior year, both of us wearing chastity rings as a symbol of our abstinence and purity even though I had gotten so much grief from my brother and friends about wearing mine that I'd taken to slipping it off when I wasn't around Chelsea.

We had been the perfect couple up until the summer before our senior year, we were in the popular crowd at school, she was a cheerleader and I was in line to be captain of the football team. During that summer Jasper and I had started creating websites for local businesses and had spent all of our time working. Chelsea had hated it and we had started fighting. I'd only ever seen the briefest glimpses of her cruelty and vindictiveness when it was directed at the nerds at school but that summer she turned it on me. She had known exactly how to manipulate and play me though and I had tried harder and harder to make her happy, accepting her blame for our troubles solely on myself. I had started to hear rumors about Chelsea at parties that I didn't attend when I was busy working but had always accepted her word that she was faithful to me and that the rumors were only spread because people were jealous of us and our relationship.

I had never believed the rumors until I had finally attended one party with Jasper to celebrate finishing our biggest project. We'd arrived very late and I'd gone looking for Chelsea to surprise her. I'd surprised her fucking Tyler Crowley on the bed of Mike Newton's little brother. I had broken Crowley's nose and then stormed out of the party. My ears still burn with humiliation when I remember that I didn't break up with Chelsea after that night. I had believed her tears and pleas that she still loved me and had been drunk and lonely because I didn't spend enough time with her. I didn't miss another party with Chelsea for the rest of the summer.

I had lost my virginity to Chelsea at the next party we went to and it had been awful, well not awful because I had still climaxed but the complete opposite to what I'd fantasized my first time with her would be like. We'd ended up in someone's twin bed with posters of half naked women staring down at us and there'd been people rattling the door handle and banging on the door every five minutes. I'd gone down on her until my jaw felt broken and I had been able to tell that she was faking every moan and gasp that she'd made. When she'd finally told me to just fuck her already she'd been so dry that I had had to spit in my hand to lubricate her and the condom I was wearing. She'd felt good, too good, but I would have been able to last for hours if I'd kept trying to look into her face and make love to her with my eyes and heart and soul like I had wanted because she was just lying there with an empty expression that didn't match her moans and gasps and breathy sighs. She'd knocked my hand away from where I was trying to massage her clit and so I'd looked down between us and watched myself plunging in and out of her until I finally came, shuddering to a stop and collapsing onto the bed beside her. Chelsea had cried when I had tried to kiss her and tell her that I loved her and I had cried when she had become hysterical and had started berating me about only using her for sex when I didn't love her anymore. She'd stopped crying when I had started weeping and pleading for her to believe that I loved her and always would and I'll never forget the small, cruel smile that had flashed briefly across her face as she'd sprung up to get dressed and go to the kitchen for another drink, leaving me alone to get dressed in a strange kid's bedroom and then to go find her surrounded by a large group of her friends.

I'd had sex with Chelsea three more times after that, always at parties because she had been refusing to come to my house or go out on dates with me and hadn't invited me over to her house. Each time had been a repeat of our first time, except for the me crying part, where we'd have hurried and unsatisfying sex, only in the missionary position because she'd freaked out the one time I'd tried to roll us over so she could ride me, and then fight about me not loving her enough before we would return to the party and pretend to be the perfect couple.

She had broken up with me the week before we started senior year, telling me she'd met a college guy who could love her like a real man and not a little boy and who actually knew how to satisfy a woman. I'd been devastated and had missed the first two weeks of school, unable to eat and sleep because of my broken heart. I'd only gone back to school when my dad had wanted to send me to one of his colleagues, a shrink, to be medicated for depression. The first rumor that I'd heard when I got to school was that I was a dud in the sack but that was ok because I'd already known that after my four times with Chelsea.

I had believed that rumor until Jasper and I had visited Emmett and Rosalie at college and tagged along to a frat party. That night I'd met Maggie, a sweet irish girl who had cum three times under my lips, hands and body and had told me that I had a magic mouth and fingers and a rockin' body. I'd returned to Forks swearing to only date girls like her, light-hearted and fun and not in high school.

The popular crowd at school had splintered into two groups at the start of the year, those loyal to Chelsea and those who wanted to hang out with Alice, Jasper and me. Soon our group had become 'the' popular crowd again when more and more girls had started to crush on "emo" me, wanting to be the girl to heal my broken heart, and the jocks and rich guys had flocked to where the girls were hanging out. Chelsea had joined back onto the peripheral of our group, single after apparently getting dumped in record time by her college guy, but she and I hadn't exchanged another word in senior year.

All of these memories had crashed through me while Bella and Alice had been at the bar, my ears had been burning, my heart pounding and my hands sweating as the pain, humiliation and anger had rolled over me. I had been gripping onto the table leg beside me so tightly that I was surprised my hand didn't come away filled with sawdust and splinters. I had heard Alice's voice coming closer to our table, talking about our company, but had still been startled when she'd placed a fresh scotch in front of me and then pleaded softly in my ear to be nice to Bella because she thought they'd be able to become close friends. I'd gritted my teeth, furious that she would even consider that I would be rude before I'd realized with a start that I hadn't even said hello to Bella when she'd arrived.

I'd felt and heard Bella step to the table then and had turned my head to murmur a smooth apology to her but had again been pole axed by the sight of Chelsea standing next to me. My mind had again catalogued all of the small differences that I could see between Bella and the Chelsea I remembered but by the time I'd recovered enough to speak Bella had spun away from the table and walked back to the bar.

"Now play nice with the new girl, little brother." Emmett had teasingly warned me and Angela and Ben had laughed, probably more with relief of the lightening of the tension that had enveloped us than with any real amusement.

I'd looked across at Emmett and seen the faint concern in his eyes and had crooked a smile at him to show that I was dealing with the situation.

I'd been prepared to say the apology I'd already rehearsed three times in my head when Bella returned. I'd been unnaturally aware of her presence when she drew within two feet of the table but had sternly schooled my brain and my tongue to perform this one simple task. All of my intentions had come undone as she had smoothly folded down into her seat and flicked back her long dark chestnut hair, that's when her fragrance had hit me, strawberries and vanilla and something indefinably Bella.

She'd reached hurriedly for the menu in front of her and I'd drank in the sight of her as she had scanned the list, chewing her bottom lip and frowning slightly. In that moment she had looked nothing like Chelsea and I had wanted to reach over and ease her lip away from her teeth and soothe where she had worried it.

I'd recoiled from her a second time, horrified that I could be both repelled by her similarities to the one girl who had hurt me and so strongly attracted to her by her voice, her scent and her physical presence. I'd pulled away from her to the very edge of my seat, desperate to get away from the smell of her fragrance and her body heat that I imagined I could feel all down the right side of my body.

I'd listened tensely to the other conversations at the table, silent and withdrawn as I had stayed twisted away from Bella sitting so close beside me, until Ben had gently drawn me back into our discussion about increasing our development team to meet the deadlines of our new project. I'd started to relax as I had gotten reacquainted with the details of the new application we were going to build and, as I had felt the tension slowly ease out of my shoulders and neck, I had imagined I felt some of the nervous energy surrounding Bella dissipate as well.

While I had been talking with Ben at least one half of my attention had stayed on the soft voice and warm laughter of the woman next to me. I'd followed the same conversations she had and had almost snorted out loud a couple of times during her interactions with Emmett. I'd also wryly decided that I'd have to tell Rosalie to warn Bella that Emmett had been serious about confiscating her damn Sun Devils hoodie if he saw it again in his gym, he was crazy when it came to college football and the University of Washington's Huskies, the team he had played for before ruining his knee.

Our food had arrived quickly and I'd almost snapped at Emmett when he'd again started to talk to an obviously hungry Bella instead of letting the poor girl eat in peace. I'd frozen in my seat though when he'd asked if she was related to Chelsea. I'd been surprised that Ben and Angela had been so oblivious to the similarities between Bella and Chelsea and then had realized that the popular crowd kids would probably have blurred into one generic, clichéd teenager to anyone outside of our group just as all of the band geeks, stoners, nerds and freaks had all blurred into one compilation geek, stoner, nerd or freak to us.

I'd listened patiently while Rosalie, Alice and Emmett had tried to find differences between Bella and Chelsea. I would have been able to list twenty differences before drawing a breath. Like how Bella's earlobes weren't pierced and were perfect and begged to be gently nipped where as Chelsea had had attached earlobes with the pierced hole always being dragged painfully down by the weight of her too big earrings. Like how Bella's neck was longer and more delicate. Like how Bella's upper lip was slightly too full compared to her bottom lip and wasn't covered in thick lipgloss like Chelsea's lips had always been. Like how Bella's eyes were a warm chocolate brown that flashed with her amusement and telegraphed her emotions where as Chelsea's eyes had been hazel and glittered with her irritation and contempt but had otherwise stayed flat and hid her secrets. Like how Bella's long dark eyelashes brushed against her cheek when she looked down and weren't clumped with mascara like Chelsea's had always been. Like how Bella was now lightly blushing under the heavy scrutiny of everyone at the table and Chelsea would have never blushed in her life. I'd drawn in a deep breath and internally shaken my head, knowing that I had to pull myself together because I had felt like I was going to fly apart with my conflicting feelings for this pretty, funny, softly spoken woman beside me.

And that's when I'd freaked out. Bella had called Chelsea a bitch. I'd had years of hearing my siblings and friends call Chelsea a bitch. They'd called her a bitch when we were together and still happy and in love to warn me about her. They'd called her a bitch after she'd broken up with me and ripped out my heart to console me. It hadn't helped because I'd never been able to see that about her. In fact it had hurt me more as I'd lost faith in my own judgment because I hadn't been able to see what had been so readily apparent to everyone around me. I still had trouble now trusting new people that I met, worrying that I couldn't read their motives and agendas. Bella was the last in a long line to call Chelsea a bitch but the first person in a while and the very last person I could tolerate hearing it from and I'd cracked. I'd had to get away from the table before I'd said something or broken something or thrown back my head and just screamed.

I'd gotten myself back under control quickly and returned to the table while everyone had still been eating. The rational part of me recognised Bella's comment as a funny, self-depreciating attempt to change the topic and deflect the attention away from herself. Unfortunately the rational part of me had been mostly buried under an avalanche of memories and emotions and the dominant part of me was now feeling unsettled and poisonous.

Bella's whispered but clear apology had almost broken my composure again. It had been sincere and perfectly pitched so I was the only person who had heard it and the new conversation at the table hadn't been disrupted. She'd turned back to the Angela's recounting of some college story but I'd quickly noticed that she had been completely unaware of what was actually being said. I'd sensed that the nervous energy around Bella's still posture had returned and one small part of me, the part that I would be ashamed of in the morning, had been glad that she was as unsettled as I was in her presence.

Bella hadn't even heard our waitress's worried enquiry about her untouched meal when our plates were being cleared. I'd flicked away the waitress's hovering attention and had then turned to Ben to restart the conversation interrupted by the arrival of our meals. I'd felt Bella stand and had assumed she was going to the bar or to the bathroom. I had frozen in my seat when I heard her making her excuses to leave, feeling stunned that she was actually leaving.

OoOoOoOOoOoOoO

I felt Jasper now slide into Bella's vacated chair and smiled weakly over at him. At least he was blocking my view of Alice, dejectedly staring at her empty cocktail glass in front of her. Another sharp pang of guilt stabbed through me as I thought how I'd failed being nice to Bella so that she'd feel welcomed in our close group. I knew Alice had few female friends, her position of seniority in our company kept her distant from her colleagues and her work schedule prevented her from enjoying much of a social life, and I could see that she'd felt an immediate connection with Bella and had been looking forward to getting closer to her.

"So, Ben, are you still playing the B grade spot in our interclub team?" Jasper asked, referring to the squash competition starting next week.

"Of course, Jasper." Ben replied easily.

"The new season starts on Tuesday. You'll play the 6pm slot, I'm on at 6:45 and Edward's playing at 7:30." Jasper continued.

"All the games are being held at Pump this season." Emmett interjected. "We're having a referee for all A grade games and the finals."

"Rosalie, aren't you playing this season?" Angela asked.

"I am, Angela. Just on a new team this time around." She smirked at me and Jasper now. "I got cleared to play in the men's A grade competition finally and I wanted the opportunity to kick Edward's and Jasper's asses."

"Nice, big sis." Jasper drawled. "The trash talk has started already, I see."

The others chatted easily now about the upcoming squash season. Jasper had saved me again, casually lightening the mood of our table and redirecting our focus onto a new topic. I rested my elbows on the table and watched my friends and family talking and laughing, the brittle edge to their laughter still noticeable when you knew them well. I'd make this right, I vowed to myself. I'd fix things so that Alice would get her new friend, so that Angela and Ben would get to see their Seattle friends together with their Phoenix friend and not have to keep us separate and so that Emmett would get another little sister to torment and protect. If I fixed things, I thought quietly in the very back of my mind, maybe I'd get closure for a piece of my past that was obviously still haunting me.


	4. Chapter 4

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

I ran both hands through my hair and slumped back in my chair, staring up at the ceiling tiles with my hands behind my head. My eyes were burning after re-reading the contract and Statement of Work document on the screen in front of me for the tenth time. Our Clients from Hell were refusing to sign off on the work we'd completed for them last month and were holding their final payment back until we had addressed the many small issues and change requests that they'd raised. The contract and documentation that had been signed originally was too open to interpretation and so we would have to absorb the time and cost to go back and rework the system that we'd implemented exactly to their original specifications. I groaned as I considered how much work that would entail, even with a low estimate of six weeks we were screwed. We didn't have the people available to move back onto a project that should have wrapped up a month ago.

I leant forward back to my keyboard and hurriedly typed out and sent a meeting request to Ben and Alice, blocking out a two hour window for us the next afternoon. We'd have to somehow work out just how we were going to fit in this extra work. I moodily considered the following day, Tuesday, in my calendar, seeing that I had six hours of meetings and conference calls now booked in. The only bright spot in my day tomorrow was the entry for the start of interclub squash tournament kicking off that evening.

I glanced at time at the bottom of my screen and grimaced when I saw it was already 6:30pm. I decided to complete the work I had left, after a day of nothing but meetings, at home after hitting the gym. I shut down and packed up my laptop, swinging the handle of my laptop case over my shoulder as I grabbed up my gym bag and turned off the lights in my corner office. As I strode to the lifts I could see that at least half of my staff were still at their desks, most likely battling to stay in front of our next looming deadline.

As I hurried the two blocks to the gym, I thought back over my weekend. I'd stopped at the café next to my apartment building for my usual Saturday morning breakfast and then spent the rest of my day in the office. I'd been restless all day, reliving my evening with Bella whenever I had relaxed the guard I'd tried to put up against my feelings and recollections of the night before. I'd been right when I'd thought I would be ashamed of myself when I woke the next day. I'd been embarrassed by my rudeness, ashamed by my petty and vindictive enjoyment of her discomfort and appalled by my weakness that I was still so hurt and angered by memories of Chelsea, a silly, screwed up, nasty girl that I hadn't even thought about in years.

I'd gone out to a club on Saturday night with Garrett and Liam, old friends from college, and had tried to distract myself with an evening of live music and harmless flirting. I'd exchanged phone numbers with two women and had too much to drink and still been unable to clear my mind of three images, the first was Bella's smiling eyes when I'd first turned to meet her, the second was Bella's frozen, shocked and hurt eyes when she'd registered my first reaction to her and the third was her slight body, tensed away from me just after she'd turned away after apologizing for making a funny joke that had meant no harm.

I'd woken up late on Sunday with a pounding hangover and the same feelings of restlessness and unease as the day before. I had gone down to the greasy spoon diner around the corner to fill my sick and shaky stomach with grease and protein for lunch. I'd returned to my apartment feeling physically better and sat down to play my piano for the first time in many months. I'd played for hours, starting out with stormy pieces that took all of my concentration to play and ending up softly tinkering on the keys, playing snippets of a sweet, haunting melody that had come to me in bursts while I'd idly played.

The rest of Sunday I'd spent pottering around my apartment, straightening papers and picking up clothes ready for my housecleaner the next day. I'd ordered take away and watched the Mariners game before collapsing into bed and dreaming unsettling dreams that I'd not been able to remember this morning.

I turned into Pump now, pausing for the automatic doors to open, and briskly walked past the front desk, catching the locker key that Brody tossed to me without breaking stride. I stripped quickly, hanging up my suit jacket and pants but crumpling my shirt into a ball; I would make a run to the drycleaners tomorrow to get my shirts washed and pressed. I don't do ironing. I pulled on a pair of light sweat pants and a white t-shirt and sat down to put on my shoes and socks. As I was tying my laces I heard Emmett's laugh booming out in the lobby and grinned, shaking my head. Judging from his laughter something had him overexcited and I jogged to the changing room door to see what mischief he'd found now.

As I pushed out into the lobby I slowed to a stop, not quite believing what was playing out in front of me at the bar. Emmett was still laughing loudly and had both arms up over his head, holding a bundle of cloth out of reach from Rosalie and Bella. Rosalie had two hands wrapped around one of Emmett's elbows and was laughing as she tried to pull his arm down, getting bumped and jostled as Emmett struggled with the two women. Rosalie was laughing…

Bella had one small hand on Emmett's front as she jumped up repeatedly, trying to grab his hands that were too high above her head. Bella was wearing the fantastic black stretchy pants she'd had on last week and a tiny tank top over a sports bra and I swallowed thickly as I watched her stretch and strain, trying to reach Emmett's prize. Her long brown hair was pulled up in a high ponytail and her cheeks were flushed red. She was laughing though, as well as spluttering threats between her breathy laughs. I almost laughed myself as I walked slowly over to them as I realized that Emmett must have carried through on his threat to confiscate Bella's damn Sun Devils hoodie if he saw it in his gym again.

I stopped in stunned amazement, just a few feet away, as I watched Bella take three quick steps backwards before springing quickly forward and launching herself up at Emmett from her short run up. She clung to him, wrapping her legs around him above his waist and placing one hand on his shoulder to push herself upwards to reach closer to the hoodie held in Emmett's hands.

"Rose, help! I've just been jumped by a strange woman. Help!" Emmett laughed.

I watched, my mouth hanging open in astonishment, as Bella swung her lower legs down, still gripping to Emmett's sides with her knees, and hooked her feet around the front of his thighs and pushed up off them, pivoting with her clamped knees and reaching up with her free hand to grab the hoodie above Emmett's head, her stomach level with his face. With a triumphant cry, she grabbed up with her second hand and relaxed her legs, half falling and half jumping down off Emmett but still gripping fiercely to the fought-over hoodie.

She stumbled back into me, bent almost double trying to tug the hoodie away from Emmett, her curved back softly bumping into my hips and lower stomach. I automatically reached out to catch her, partly to protect my goods from a stray elbow or other injury but mostly to make sure she was safe. I went to catch her around her stomach but my right arm ended up wrapped around her ribs, high under her breasts, and my left hand ended up gripping her waist, touching bare skin where her tank top had ridden up in her struggles. She straightened in my arms in surprise, releasing the hoodie abruptly. I almost fell back then myself as I was assaulted by the physical sensations of holding her.

"Careful!" My intended joking warning came out as a strangled hiss as her fragrance enveloped me and the feeling of her slender, soft body pressed against mine registered.

I drew in a ragged breath as my hand burned against the bare skin of her waist and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up at the feel of my forearm pressing up into the softness of her breasts.

She gasped and whipped around in my arms, stumbling back a step. Her eyes were wide and her lips parted in shock as she met my heated stare for a brief second. She crossed her arms over her chest and took another step back, dropping her eyes from my intense gaze. I watched in fascinated awe as a painful blush flooded her upper chest and swept up her neck and into her face.

"Sorry." She muttered before turning to face Emmett.

"Fuck you're strong, Bella." Emmett puffed, rubbing one of his sides, still chuckling.

"You are a jerk!" She growled, stepping forward and poking him in the stomach with a forefinger. "Ow!" She glared harder at him, clutching at her finger.

She spun away from us, hurrying to the double doors that led out of the lobby towards the exercise and weight rooms.

"I want my hoodie back, Emmett!" She called over her shoulder as she pushed through the doors. "Bye Rosalie!"

I just watched her rush away, my mouth open with shock. Emmett started laughing again at my expression and I snapped my jaw shut and turned to him and Rosalie. Rosalie reached up and pecked Emmett on the lips and I noticed that she was dressed to leave. Emmett was still in shorts and a black wifebeater with his ever present knee brace protecting his left knee. He swatted her ass as she turned to walk away and she winked at him and blew him a kiss over her shoulder. She ignored me completely and sashayed past the front desk, turning right when she reached the street.

"So, little brother, upper body tonight?" Emmett asked, clapping a hand onto my back as we turned to follow Bella further into the gym.

"Yeah, I guess…" I muttered, still reeling from what had just happened.

"C'mon, let's get your head back on straight." He laughed, pushing through the double doors and then opening the door into the exercise room and gesturing me ahead of him. "Free weights to start with and then we'll grab some machines for a circuit."

I groaned, I was going to hurt tomorrow morning after one of Emmett's custom 'circuits'. I looked around the room for Bella as we stepped towards one of the archways that led into the weights room, finally spotting her stretching beside a treadmill in the front window. I drank in the sight of her, realizing with a jolt that I hadn't mistaken her for Chelsea once this evening. I snapped my head back forward when she straightened and looked over at me, not wanting to get caught ogling at her.

"Are you doing ok, Edward?" Emmett asked softly.

I didn't try to dodge his question at all, knowing exactly what he was referring to.

"Yeah." I muttered.

He waited patiently for me to say more. Although he'd already left for college when Chelsea had broken up with me he knew how hard I'd taken it and I could see he was worried about me now.

"It was just a shock seeing her on Friday, Emmett. I wasn't prepared for it, I guess." I continued.

He snorted quietly. "I know, I almost laid into her right at the table for hurting my little brother back in high school." He paused and then blew out a noisy breath, watching me out of the corner of his eye now. "Bella seems really cool, Edward."

"Yeah, I guess she does." I agreed quietly.

"I'm just saying…" He paused, analyzing my words and expression. "It'd be nice to hang out with her sometimes." He was pushing now.

"I agree. I'm going to make things right, Emmett." I promised.

"Ok! Now let's get some testosterone pumping again before we start talking about what outfits we're going to wear on Friday night." He said, punching my arm.

I laughed and started stretching to get warmed up and ready for another grueling Emmett workout. I fought the temptation to look over at Bella during our session, needing to focus on my breathing and form while Emmett tortured me. He repeated everything I did just with heavier weights and we spent a comfortable, quiet hour pushing ourselves to our limits. We finished up with crunches and I lay panting on a mat at the end, feeling faintly nauseous with weak and trembling muscles in my arms and chest. When I caught my breath again I started my cool down routine, taking extra time to stretch out the muscles that I knew I would feel in the morning.

Bella was gone by the time I finished cooling down and I wondered if I would see her before our Friday night dinner. I wanted to see her again, I realized, as I remembered that the one word I'd ever said to her was to tell her to be careful in a harsh voice. I wanted to see her and talk to her and start repairing whatever damage I'd caused to our possible friendship by my behavior towards her so far.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

The next morning I woke feeling better physically than I'd expected but I still had a longer and hotter shower than normal and then spent ten minutes stretching my chest and arm muscles before getting dressed for my day. I beat everyone into the office again and spent the only quiet hour I would have all day responding to emails and preparing for my day of meetings.

Alice, Ben and I eventually called Jasper into our afternoon meeting to discuss hiring more people than we'd originally planned to meet the deadlines we were facing for the new project we had coming up and the now re-opened project for our Clients from Hell. We decided we'd have to bring in contractors to meet the short term spike in our teams' workloads and that we would shuffle our existing, senior people onto both projects and balance their knowledge and experience with our new hires. I made a note to contact our preferred recruitment company to get the process rolling and we wrapped our meeting up early. Jasper motioned for me to hang back and we spent the remaining twenty minutes of the time I'd set aside for the meeting working through our current mini cashflow crisis.

Walking back to my office I ran a hand roughly through my hair, I was barely holding myself together today feeling all of the pressures of the company weighing down on my shoulders, I glanced at my watch and saw that I had two hours before I would have to leave to make it to see the first game of the new interclub squash season. Jasper and I had a tradition for the first night of each season to hang out and watch each other's games and then grab some beers when we'd all finished. This was the first year that Ben would be playing on our team and we'd made sure that he would join us afterwards with Angela.

I shut the door to my office and started working through the emails that had clogged my inbox over the day and moved on to the phone calls that I had to return before the close of business. The next time I looked at the time I saw that I'd have to really run to make it to the gym in time for the start of Ben's game. I hurriedly packed away my laptop and grabbed up my gym bag and squash kit and then jogged to the elevators, bouncing on my toes with impatience while I waited for the lift to arrive. Arriving at the ground floor, I jogged over to the revolving doors and was sprinting as soon I burst out on to the street.

I changed at the gym in record time and ran up the stairs to the second floor rather than waiting for the lift. I wildly rounded the corner from the stairwell into the wide corridor behind the squash courts and then slowed to a saunter when I saw that Ben was still waiting to start and that everyone was turned to see my dramatic entrance. I smirked over at Jasper, Ben and Angela standing in front of the court closest to the stairs and thrust my hands into the front pockets of my tennis shorts as I walked over, playing for casual now that I knew I wasn't late.

"Smooth, Edward." Jasper drawled as I moved within easy earshot.

I huffed a laugh and shrugged one shoulder.

I looked past Angela and the guys to the other side of the corridor where doors led into the aerobics studios and saw Bella and Alice standing with Tanya, one of the instructors at the gym. Alice was dressed straight from the office, in a black skirt and tailored jacket with high heels. Tanya had on her usual uniform of tight lycra shorts and a crop top but wasn't wearing shoes. Bella stopped me breathing. She was wearing another tank top and a pair of black stretchy jersey shorts and was wearing flip flops. Her hair was pulled up into a messy bun at the back of her head and she had a towel and yoga mat tucked under one arm. I turned away abruptly before I started drooling and blinked rapidly, trying to clear the fog that had settled into my brain as I had admired the endless expanses of skin displayed with Bella's long, smooth limbs and slender but curvy frame.

I waved down to Emmett and Rosalie who were standing at a further court with Rosalie's new teammates, Peter and Charlotte, and then looked over at the three guys we'd be playing tonight. I had played and beaten both of their A grade players, Paul and Embry, but hadn't seen the kid who would be playing Ben tonight. He was tall and so he would have a definite advantage over Ben with his reach but Ben was quick and determined, it would be an interesting game.

I saw Bella and Tanya disappear into the smallest studio in my peripheral vision and was then joined by Alice as I sat down on the two-tiered bleacher style benches that were placed along the corridor in front of the glass back walls of the squash courts. Jasper and Angela came over and sat with us as Ben and the new kid stepped onto the court and the first game of the new season started.

Ben beat the new kid, Quil, in a very close match. Quil had ended up being as quick as Ben but was inexperienced and Ben had been able to just stay in front with some sneaky strategic plays that he'd learnt off me and Jasper. Emmett had organized for trays of fruit and sandwiches to be set up on tables spaced along the corridor and I watched the first match while distractedly stealing grapes off Alice's plate when she wasn't paying attention.

Jasper started his match with Paul, a guy we'd played over the last three seasons. Jasper was winning fairly easily but it was a frustrating game. Jasper was fitter, quicker and stronger than his opponent but Paul was known for his short temper, dirty tactics and poor sportsmanship. He was keeping the referee busy with appeals for interference and obstruction and their match was running late. I was still sitting beside Alice, intent on their final set, when the yoga class behind us finished.

I was watching one of the last rallies of the match when Bella came over to where we were sitting and my body turned unconsciously towards her even though I kept watching Jasper playing the point on the court in front of us.

"Hey Bella, how was the class?" Alice asked beside me.

"Good, Alice." Bella's warm voice replied. "I feel invigorated but kind of all rubbery at the same time." She laughed.

"You look like you've had a shower with your clothes on, Phoenix." Ben laughed from the other side of Alice and Angela.

My face angled more towards Bella now, I had to see Bella looking like she'd just stepped out of the shower, but I kept my eyes glued on the play in front of me also needing to see who won the point.

"Yeah, probably. They turn the heat up in the room, Ben." Bella chuckled. "That's why it's called Hot Yoga… Not because of all the girls wearing next to nothing with bodacious bods."

I heard the sound of flesh lightly smacking flesh and whipped my head around so quickly I almost dislocated something in my neck. She did not just smack her own ass, did she? Bella was standing behind us and Alice, Angela and Ben had all turned to face her. She did look like she'd just had a shower with her clothes on, her hair was wet and sticking to her face and neck where it had come loose from its bun, her skin was damp and shiny with sweat and her clothes clung wetly to her body. She was laughing over at Ben, her face lightly flushed, and looked glowing and fresh and natural. I swallowed and couldn't think of anything to say and so I just sat there staring at her.

"Hi, Edward!" Tanya greeted me breathily.

Bella looked over at me and met my gaze for a second. I flicked my glance from her to Tanya and turned back to the court in front of me.

"Hello, Tanya." I replied curtly.

Tanya and I had a history, a history of her chasing me and me retreating as fast as possible. She was tall and pretty with strawberry blonde curly hair and she was interested in me. She was exactly the kind of woman I usually dated except for one thing; I suspected that she wanted more than the lighthearted, easy relationship I could offer, and so I kept my distance from her and ignored her flirting and approaches.

Jasper won the point and was now serving for the match. I watched the rally in front of me analytically; Jasper was manipulating the play easily and would win the point and the game in the next couple of shots.

"Alice, are we still on for lunchtime tomorrow?" Bella asked behind me.

"I'm looking forward to it, Bella." Alice replied. "If you give me your number I can text you when I'm downstairs at your building."

"Oh… um, I don't actually know my number." Bella's laugh sounded rueful. "Angela, do you have your phone on you? I need my new number for Alice."

The girls chatted easily while Jasper won the point in front of me. I started getting my racquet and goggles out of my squash kit at my feet.

"I'm going to hit the change rooms." Bella spoke behind me.

"See you tomorrow, Bella." Alice and Angela chorused together and then laughed.

"Jinx, Alice!" Angela cried.

"See you both tomorrow!" Bella laughed back at them and I could hear that she had moved away.

I panicked slightly, standing and facing her retreating back; I had assumed that she would be joining us for drinks at the end of the night.

"Hey, Arizona?" I called after, not knowing why I didn't use her name, Bella. I watched as she stopped short and paused before slowly turning to face me, surprise written on her face.

"You're not coming out for drinks after my game?" I asked awkwardly, half questioning and half making a statement and not sounding like I was actually issuing an invitation.

She flicked her eyes over to Alice before returning her gaze to mine. "No, sorry. I've got a pile of work to get through tonight. Maybe next time."

I guessed by her glance at Alice that she'd already been invited to come and had declined the offer. I could also tell that she didn't mean it when she said she might join us next time, she'd have another excuse ready when she was asked again.

"Yeah, maybe…" I shrugged and turned away to step down off the bench I was standing on. I followed Embry, my opponent, on to the court pulling on my protective glasses as I walked.

I shut down all of my thoughts now, wanting to focus only on the match in front of me. I shook out my arms and flexed my neck, bouncing on my toes, as Embry spun his racquet to decide who'd serve first. I could already tell that I would spend plenty of time later going over every second of my short interaction with Bella repeatedly. I shook my head now, still trying clear my head of thoughts of Bella; I needed to concentrate on the game or Embry would hand my ass to me tonight. I breathed in deeply and finally felt the calmness and focus I needed start to settle in my mind.


	5. Chapter 5

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I tied my laces slowly, sitting on the bench in the change room at Pump. I actually didn't want to work out tonight, it was late and I just wanted to curl up on my sofa with a tub of ice cream before having a long bath and falling into bed. I was tired and drained after a long, difficult day at work and two nights of poor sleep. I'd been having unsettling and vivid dreams about Edward since bumping into him, literally, on Monday evening and I'd woken up the last two mornings feeling more tired than I'd been before falling asleep. The highlight of my day today had been meeting with Alice at lunchtime to find her a yoga mat so she could join me in the Hot Yoga classes while she waited for Jasper on his squash nights. The only other good thing about today was the fact that it was Wednesday and there were now only two days until the weekend.

I stood up slowly and walked out into the lobby, pushing in my earbuds and pulling up the hood of my gray light cotton hoodie as I went. I knew I'd feel better after a run and so I shrugged off my thoughts of Edward's invasion of my dreams and my crap day and instead thought of my plan to get back at Emmett next week for stealing my Sun Devils hoodie. I smiled as I selected my 'Warm Up' playlist on my iPod and pushed into the exercise room.

I smiled wider in my best Cheshire Cat grin over at Emmett when I saw him stretching on some mats next to Edward, carefully avoiding looking at Edward. I smirked as I made my way over to the treadmills in the front window now feeling more like working out. Emmett was fun and I was looking forward to what I knew would turn into a running battle of pranks that started with him stripping off my hoodie on Monday in the lobby. I was lucky that I was wearing a tank top underneath my hoodie that day although I'd wished I was wearing three winter sweaters and a ski suit when I'd ended up in Edward's arms and stopped breathing at the jolt I'd felt with his hips behind me and the heat of his arm pressing up under my breasts while his hand burned on my waist.

I stretched for five minutes and then stepped onto my usual treadmill in the center of the window looking out onto the street. It was dark outside now and all I could see in the window tonight was the reflection of the room behind me. I set my bottle of water and iPod in the holders on the control panel in front of my after scrolling up to my 'Running Away' playlist and punched the speed up to an easy jog, waiting until I'd settled into the pace before increasing the speed again.

I had been running for ten minutes and had settled into a comfortable stride when I saw Edward in the reflected room in front of me walking across the room directly towards my position at the front of the room. I watched him curiously as he strode gracefully between the lines of equipment separating us but lowered my eyes quickly to the controls in front of me when I noticed that he appeared to be looking at my face in the reflection on the glass in front of me. I peeked up at his reflection through my eyelashes and my stomach fluttered as I discretely ogled at him, his hair was damply clinging to his forehead and neck, his gray t-shirt was dark with sweat around his neck and chest and he looked tall and fit and strong.

I dropped my eyes again as he passed through the line of treadmills behind me. I felt him stop at my treadmill and lean over to look at the control display in front of me before he pulled back. I couldn't hear him over the music pounding in my ears and my peripheral vision was blocked by the hood drawn forward over my head but I knew he had stepped on to the treadmill beside me, my body tingling at his presence five feet away. I ran on, keeping my eyes locked on the controls in front of me for a long minute.

I finally peeked up to the reflection in the window in front of me to confirm that he was actually beside me and immediately dropped my eyes back down after meeting his intent stare in the reflected room. He was easily matching my pace, our strides synchronized on the two machines side by side. I frowned down at the controls in front of me, now feeling awkward about running beside him with my iPod and hoodie barriers isolating me from any interaction. I didn't actually want to interact with him, wary of his stormy moods, but knew it would be rude and uncomfortable to ignore him when he was such a close friend of Ben and Angela and I had been seeing him around a lot since I'd started at the gym.

I sighed internally and reached up and pushed back my hood, pulling out my earbuds in the same motion. I looked over sideways to where he was jogging, his stride smooth and effortless. A high flush from his exertion stained his cheekbones and I watched a bead of sweat run from his brow down his cheek before it dropped from his strong jaw onto his shirt.

"Hi. Edward." I said between puffs, my breathing slightly heavy with my running.

"Arizona." He said as a greeting, keeping his head straight ahead and not looking over at me.

I turned my head back to face forward and rolled my eyes; stupid Ben and his stupid nicknames. I saw from Edward's smirk in our reflection that he'd been watching me there and he'd seen my reaction and thought it was funny. Great, I thought as I inwardly rolled my eyes again, now I'd have two comedians calling me by that stupid nickname.

I peeked through my eyelashes at him in our mirrored image of the room as we ran. He looked tired with dark shadows under his eyes. He also looked stressed compared to the laughing, relaxed Edward I'd seen yesterday after he had wheeled wildly around the corner to the squash courts and tried to downplay his hurry. I thought I could see tension tightening the corners of his eyes and sharpening the line of his jaw. As I started to relax into my run again, I shifted my attention away from Edward in our reflection and instead watched the people around the room behind me as they worked out on the different machines.

We jogged in silence for five minutes; I was watching two women working out on ellipticals behind us as they in turn watched Edward run beside me. They were being fairly discreet until both their mouths dropped open in unison. I glanced sideways at Edward to see what he'd done to make them gape like that and felt my own jaw fall open. Edward had pulled up his shirt by the hem and was using his t-shirt to wipe the sweat off his face as he ran, revealing his hard stomach and back and how his sweatpants were sitting low on his hips. I flashed my eyes to our reflection in front of us and stared openly at his perfection. I don't know what view the two women behind me had but I had the best view in the room of his hard, defined abs and his slim hips. I swallowed hugely and felt my eyes widen more as I watched the shift and play of his muscles under his sweat slicked skin as he ran. He dropped his shirt and I pulled my gaze up to his eyes in our reflection.

He was grinning crookedly right back at me, fully aware that I'd been gaping at him like a idiot and not hiding his amusement at my reaction to his show. I dropped my eyes down to the controls in front of me and grabbed my water bottle, carefully taking a few short sips as I ran, trying to distract myself from the blush I felt rising in my cheeks before it got hotter and deeper. I raised my eyes up to our reflection again and saw that he was still grinning at me, his awareness of my awareness glittering hotly in his stare. I rolled my eyes at his obvious cockiness.

"You look tired." I told him to break the tension that was fast descending around us, looking over at him beside me.

"Arizona, I can go all night." He drawled, his normally velvet voice now husky and deep, also turning to smile over at me.

I snorted at his cheesy line. "Yep, I'm sure you can." I said dryly. "Except I meant that you look like you've had the kind of day I had." I explained.

He frowned at me, his smile vanishing, and he turned his head abruptly back to the front. I turned my face towards his in our reflection and he dropped his eyes away from mine and frowned at the control panel in front of him with his jaw clenched. I was going to get whiplash trying to follow his moods I thought and felt suddenly tired and not up to the task of working out how I kept managing to upset him.

"Sorry, that was presumptuous of me." I apologized, not quite knowing what I'd said that was so wrong.

I decided abruptly to call it a night and rapidly slowed my treadmill down to a leisurely walk. I saw in our reflection that Edward was looking over at me in surprise.

I stopped my treadmill, grabbing my water bottle and iPod as it slowed to a standstill, and stepped down carefully, holding onto the rail until I was sure I had my balance on the ground when it wasn't moving beneath me.

"I have had a long day and so I'm going to head home." I told him, raising my hand lamely in farewell.

I turned away from him and began threading my way around the machines back towards the door.

Edward had placed his feet on either side of the running surface beneath him and was waiting for the machine to slow to a stop.

"Arizona, wait!" He called.

He sounded frustrated and I realized that I really didn't care and that I preferred it when he was ignoring me like yesterday when he would look over at me occasionally and then look away again disinterestedly.

"I'll probably see you tomorrow, Edward. Goodnight." I called over my shoulder.

I pushed out of the door and then hurried over to and slipped out through the double doors in to the lobby. I half ran to the change room, intent on making my escape now. I decided just to pull on my coat over my workout clothes, skipping the showers at the gym in favor of a long, relaxing bath back at my apartment. I grabbed my bags from my locker and shrugged into my coat before moving through the door out into the lobby and pulling up at the front desk to hand in my locker key.

Emmett was working at a computer terminal next to Jessica at the desk and he looked up with a huge smile for me.

"Bella, short session tonight, huh?" He asked.

"Yeah, it's not been the greatest of days, Emmett. My highlight was lunch with Alice." I told him as I handed my key to Jessica.

"Oh…" He murmured, watching me closely, his smile gone now.

"Yeah… Anyway, goodnight, Emmett. I might see you tomorrow. Say hi to Rosalie for me, please." I rambled, walking backwards towards the street.

"Okay, take care, Bella." He smiled at me but it wasn't the smile I was used to seeing.

I spun around and walked quickly out onto the street. I turned left towards my apartment building and hurried the two blocks home, rushing towards the comfort of my apartment and away from the unsettling presence of Edward Cullen.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I slammed down my phone in frustration. I'd just spent twenty minutes trying to schedule a sit down meeting with one of my authors, Jane Alexander, to discuss my revisions to her manuscript and we'd finished up with her blithely telling me that she couldn't make time right now and then hanging up on me. I pulled my keyboard toward me and carefully worded an email requesting a meeting in the next week and fired it off to her. I closed down all of my open applications and then shut down my computer, wanting to get out of the office and to the gym to meet Alice for our Bikram Yoga class.

I walked briskly towards Pump, focusing on my breathing and posture while I walked to try and shake off my shitty mood before I had to walk into the yoga studio. There had been two silver linings to my day, the first was that I'd been so busy that I hadn't been able to dwell on Edward Cullen and the second was that it was Thursday with only one more work day left before the weekend.

I turned into the doors at Pump and got a locker key from Brody on the desk after paying for my class with the last of the cash I had in my wallet. I walked over to the change room and pulled open the door to the change room, almost colliding with Alice as she walked out.

"Bella!" She grabbed me in a quick, hard hug and then spun around me into the lobby. "I'll wait for you out here. Hurry up!"

"Okay, Alice. Give me two minutes and I'll be out." I promised her.

I quickly changed into the new yoga tank top with inbuilt bra and new shorts that I'd bought with Alice on Tuesday. They were navy blue and super comfortable and were made out of a special fabric designed to wick moisture away from your skin. I pulled up my hair into a bun and then stuffed my bags into my locker, grabbing up my yoga mat, towel and water bottle and slipping into my flip flops before clacking in them to the door and pushing out into the lobby.

I looked around for Alice and stopped when I saw her standing at the juice bar. She was waiting with Jasper, Rosalie and Edward and talking with Emmett working behind the counter. Alice was wearing the deep red tank top, black shorts and flip flops that she'd bought on Tuesday with me. The nails of her fingers and toes were painted to perfectly match her singlet top and her short, dark hair was spiked artfully around her head. Rosalie was wearing a tiny black tennis skirt and snug white baby doll t-shirt and her tanned legs looked endless in her white anklet socks and shoes. Jasper and Edward were both wearing dark tennis shorts and white short sleeved polo shirts and while I could objectively appreciate Jasper's handsome looks and lean, athletic build, Edward's beauty and physical presence took my breath away.

I breathed in shakily and dropped my eyes to the floor in front of me as I walked slowly over, not wanting to have him catch me gawking at him again like a teenage girl with a crush. I stopped beside Rosalie, unconsciously shaking my head as I looked at them as a group again.

"What's up, Bella?" Jasper asked me, smiling lazily at me.

"Huh?" I said articulately and looked at him quizzically, still a bit stunned by their collective good looks.

"You were shaking your head and looked lost in thought." He told me now.

"Oh…" I said, gesturing vaguely with my water bottle at them as a group. "You guys just look like you come from a different planet from the rest of us mere mortals." I muttered and started to blush painfully as I realized what I'd just said out loud.

"We do, Bella. Planet Orsum!" Emmett laughed from behind the juice bar.

I snorted. "Yeah, Emmett. The planet right next to Uranus." I smirked over at him, forgetting my blush as I joked with Emmett.

Emmett threw his head back with his booming laugh. Jasper was laughing silently and Alice smiled brightly over at me, her eyes twinkling with her amusement. I thought I heard Edward snort but didn't look in his direction, still embarrassed by my original remark.

Rosalie had rolled her eyes at my comeback and now clasped Alice's and my elbows and pulled us though the double doors into the corridor past the exercise and weight rooms towards the lift up to the squash courts and yoga studio on the second floor.

"C'mon, Alice. We'll be here all night if these two start with the insults." She laughed. "Jazz, can you grab my racquet?"

We joined two girls I recognised from my yoga class waiting for the elevator. When the doors opened I stepped in after the two girls in front of Alice and Rosalie. I felt Edward step quickly in behind me, my skin tingling just by his close proximity beside me. As I turned to face the doors I flashed a glance up at his face and met his darkly glittering green eyes, I was almost pressed up against him in the now crowded lift and his racquet brushed my calf.

"You should check in the mirror sometime soon, Arizona." He murmured and ran his heated gaze down my body and back up to my face with a knowing, crooked smile dimpling one cheek. "Mere mortal, huh?" He scoffed.

He'd spoken so quietly that Rosalie, Alice and Jasper chatting in front of us didn't hear him. I helplessly held his stare, trapped in his mesmerizing gaze and blushing hotly as my lips parted slightly in reaction to his eyes and smile. He dropped his eyes to stare at my mouth for a long moment and then dragged them back up to meet mine again. He quirked an eyebrow down at me and his smile grew wider. I tore my eyes away from his and stared at Jasper's back, goose bumps lifting on my arm and leg closest to him as he shifted slightly next to me and his racquet again brushed against my lower leg.

After an eternity the lift doors finally opened out on to the second floor and I almost pushed Jasper out of my way in my hurry to get out of the elevator. I saw Alice watching me and smiled weakly at her, stepping to her side as we started to move to the open door of the yoga studio.

"See you after class, Alice, Arizona." Edward called from behind us, laughter apparent in his velvet voice.

I ignored him but saw Alice, in my peripheral vision, shoot him a look over her shoulder and then look back over at me.

I shrugged one shoulder at her. "Eh, everyone thinks they're a comedian." I said and failed at trying not to blush harder at her own knowing smile as she saw through my attempt at subterfuge.

We walked into the studio and spread out our mats next to each other, chatting comfortably while we waited for the class to begin.

I gratefully lost myself for the ninety minutes of the class and finished up feeling relaxed, limber and calm. I smiled over at Alice as we toweled down over our yoga clothes before leaving the studio. Her hair was plastered wetly to her head and her porcelain complexion held a high flush over her cheekbones identical to the one I'd seen on Edward running on the treadmill the night before. Alice looked blissful, her normally bouncy energy was calmed and she looked radiantly happy.

"Did you enjoy your first class, Alice?" I asked, already seeing her answer in her peaceful state.

"Oh, Bella. I should have done this years ago." She murmured. "I have a lot to catch up with to keep up with you, though."

"I think you did really well, Alice. You're already really flexible and graceful and you made some of the poses that I still struggle with look easy." I reassured her. "I almost ended up tied up like a pretzel in my first yoga class." I told her, chuckling at the memory.

We followed the rest of the class out of the room slowly, walking with our instructor, Tanya, who Alice knew well through Emmett and Rosalie. The three of us decided to bypass the queue at the elevator and take the stairs, the slapping of our flip flops echoing around the stairwell as we clattered down to the ground floor.

We joined a small crowd of our class exiting from the elevator and followed them out through the double doors into the lobby. Jasper and Edward were waiting at the juice bar, already showered and changed. Jasper was laughing over at Emmett as he goofed around making smoothies for two women at the other end of the counter.

Edward was leaning back against the counter, propped on his elbows watching the crowd of women walking through the doors into the lobby. His bronze hair was still damp from the shower and he was wearing a long sleeved black t-shirt and the same dark jeans I remembered from the first time I saw him. I bit my lip against my laughter as I watched every female head in front of me turn to stare at him as they walked past the juice bar on their way to the change room. I rolled my eyes at his cocky, crooked smirk when I met his eyes thinking that he'd better be careful who he turned that smile on because he would get mobbed by the whole class if he used it carelessly.

I paused with Alice when she stopped behind Jasper and tapped him on the back. He turned around and smiled as he looked down over her, drinking in the sight of her disheveled state after our workout. I laughed at the widening of his eyes as Alice held her arms out for a hug and stepped towards him.

"Ah Alice, you are soaking wet." He laughed, catching her waist and holding her back away from his clean, dry clothes.

"Bella! Alice! Tanya! Can I make you a juice or smoothie?" Emmett called as he saw us from the other end of the bar.

"Yes! I'll have my usual please, Emmett." Alice replied, distracted from her mischief with Jasper.

"I'll have a mango sunrise, thanks Emmett." Tania said from where she was now standing close to Edward.

I frowned up at the menu on the wall above the bar, trying to decide what to order. While I read the menu I distractedly tucked my rolled up yoga mat between my knees and began toweling off my arms, neck and chest, drying off the fresh perspiration that I could feel starting to roll down my skin again.

"Bella?" Emmett asked again.

"Um… Juice? Please." I bit my lip, still frowning and trying to decide. "What's good?" I asked.

"I'll make you something special, Bella." Emmett said as he walked towards us behind the counter. "I'll call it the Bella Special."

"Original, Emmett." I laughed. "And thanks, that's really nice of you." I tacked on, realizing I probably sounded rude.

"Okay, well ladies, your drinks will be ready when you're finished changing." He said.

I slung my towel over my shoulder and grabbed my yoga mat from between my knees and flicked a glance at Edward before I moved off towards the change rooms. He was still leaning back against the counter staring at me, his face wiped clean of any expression with his self assured grin gone and his mouth relaxed slightly open. I raised an eyebrow at him questioningly but he turned his head to listen to something Tanya was saying and then straightened up off the bar and turned towards her.

I smiled over at Emmett and then Jasper as I began to move towards the change room but paused and watched Jasper as he bent forward to peck Alice on the lips, still holding her at a safe distance away from his clothes, and then gently pushed her after me. I waited for Alice to catch up to me as we both walked away to shower and change.

In the shower, with the water tepid to help cool down my core body temperature after my workout, I chattered with Alice in the next cubicle over the sound of the water of our showers. I liberally used my favorite body wash and shampoo and then stood for an extra minute letting the hard needles of water pound into my neck, shoulders and back. I heard Alice shut off her water and quickly did the same, hurriedly toweling off and then wrapping my towel around my body to walk back over to my locker. I pulled on clean panties and another tank top with a built in shelf bra and then slipped on a pair of gray sweat pants and a plain black hoodie, keeping it unzipped so I wouldn't start to overheat again. I pulled on a pair of socks and then pushed my feet into my sneakers, leaving the laces untied for the moment. I quickly pulled my brush through my wet hair and then pulled it back into a pony tail at the back of my head.

I gathered up my wet workout clothes, wrapped them in my towels and then shoved them and my toiletry bag into the waterproof compartment in my gym bag. I zipped my office clothes into the other side of the bag and slung the strap over my shoulder. I pulled my messenger bag and purse out of the locker and tucked my yoga mat under my arm before walking quickly out of the change room. I saw with surprise that Alice was already sitting on a stool between Rosalie and Jasper at the juice bar, dressed in jeans and a black sweater. I returned my locker key to the front desk and then shuffled over to join them, my untied sneakers flicking off my feet and hitting the floor before my heel with every stride as I walked.

Jasper gestured to the seat between him and Edward that had a juice waiting in front of it. Edward had his back to me, still talking to Tanya as I clopped over to the stool and dropped my bags to the floor. I knelt down to rummage in my purse beside me for the spare twenty dollar bill I kept for nights like tonight when I'd forgotten to get cash out. I heard Edward saying goodbye to Tanya and sat back on my heels to begin to return all of the items I'd taken out of my purse in my rummaging back into my bag. I felt Edward shift and, seeing that his feet were now facing me, I looked up at him from where I was still kneeling, sitting back on my heels.

He looked down at me with a faint look of alarm on his face and I frowned up at him before I realized where his mind had taken him, seeing me kneeling at his feet and looking back up along his body at him. I dropped my eyes quickly and finished stuffing my junk back into my purse and then started to tie my shoe laces, all the while trying to stop my silent laughter but knowing my shaking shoulders were giving away my giggling fit.

I stood up when I'd recovered and sat on my stool, pushing my twenty dollars onto the bar, ready to pay for my juice.

"You always surprise me, Arizona." Edward murmured and I looked over at him and met his eyes laughing down at me.

He always surprised me too, I thought as I took in his relaxed expression. I could never predict his moods or reactions, I'd expected to look at him and have the same heavy, electric tension from the elevator descend upon us again. Instead he seemed to have found the situation just as funny as I had.

I shrugged and lightly smiled back at him and then turned away as I was distracted by Emmett stopping in front of me.

"What do you think of the Bella Special?" Emmett asked expectantly, gesturing at the drink in front of me.

"Oops!" I reached for the drink and took a careful sip, closing my eyes at its delicious strawberry-ness. "It's perfect! Sweet, refreshing and delicious! What's in it?" I asked, opening my eyes to look at Emmett.

"Sorry, Bella. It's a secret recipe, it's been in the family for the last five minutes and a carefully guarded secret." Emmett teased.

I quirked an eyebrow at him. "Family recipe, huh?"

"Yep!" He said, popping the 'p'. "Edward helped me out with it."

I glanced out of the corner of my eye at Edward and saw him shaking his head at Emmett to stop him talking.

"Oh, okay." I shrugged, letting it slide.

I pushed my money over to Emmett with one hand, holding my drink in the other hand, eagerly drinking through the straw now.

"Sorry, Bella, your money is no good here." Emmett said, pushing the money back to me.

I looked at his face carefully, reading his conviction to decide if it was worth arguing over paying for my drink. Seeing that I wouldn't win, I smiled and picked up the note.

"Thank you very much." I said graciously. "It's the nicest juice I've had. The best ev-a!" I finished lightly, turning slightly towards Edward to include him in my thanks.

I quickly finished the drink, still surprised at how delicious and refreshing it was. I slipped down off my stool, zipping up my hoodie, and then bent down to return the cash to my purse and grab up my bags. I straightened up, juggling my bags onto my shoulder.

"Emmett, thank you again for the juice." I said and then stepped back so I could see the whole group. "I have to get going, I have a hot date with another manuscript." I said to everyone, patting my messenger bag on my hip.

"I'm leaving too. I have to finish that documentation for the Clients from Hell." I heard Edward say beside me.

I looked over in surprise and saw that he was standing with his gym bag and squash racquet bag in one hand while reaching over with his other to bump fists with Emmett over the counter. Jasper had spun around on his stool and I shook the hand he was holding out to me before he turned to bump fists with Edward now standing much closer beside me. I pressed the side of my face against Alice's as she stepped forward and gave me a one armed hug and then repeated the action, a little surprised, with Rosalie who had also left her stool to say farewell.

I waited awkwardly for Edward to say goodbye to Alice and Rosalie, not sure if he expected me to walk out of the gym with him before making our own farewells. He stepped back to my side and then gestured with his free hand towards the front doors. I stepped towards the doors, watching him in my peripheral vision, and saw him step beside me, matching his stride to mine, with a small smile lifting the corner of his mouth.

We walked out onto the street and I slowed to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk, still feeling awkward.

"Um, I'm in this direction." I said, waving my hand down the street to my left.

"Me too." He replied easily and turned with me, again matching his pace easily with mine, staying close beside me.

We walked in silence, both of us with our faces turned to the front, Edward still with that secretive smile on his lips that I could see when I looked over at him out of the corner of my eye. We covered the two blocks to my apartment quickly and I stopped abruptly in front of my building. Edward walked on for two strides before spinning around in surprise and then stepping back to my side.

"Er, this is me." I said, flapping my hand at the front door, now feeling even more awkward after our silent walk.

"I'm two doors up." He said, nodding his head down the street in the direction we had been walking.

I watched his profile for a quick moment before looking over at my door and shifting my feet uncomfortably.

"Okay, well, goodnight Edward." I mumbled and turned away.

"Goodnight, Arizona." He said softly back and I could hear amusement in his voice again.

I frowned as I walked into my building and stepped over to the lifts. I felt even more confused by Edward after tonight. His moods were mercurial, one minute he could be coldly angry, the next minute burning with a self-assured, raw sexual magnetism that I drowned under, the minute after that he could be lightheartedly laughing and then he could be quiet and mysterious with no way of telling what he was thinking or feeling. Being around him was like being on a rollercoaster with a blindfold on, I thought wryly.

I could handle him if he just stuck with any one of his swinging personalities, I thought. It would be easy, avoiding angry Edward, shamelessly taking wanton advantage of sex-god Edward, goofing off with happy Edward and watching mysterious Edward in fascinated awe from a distance. I couldn't cope with ricocheting between the different Edwards though. He left me feeling vulnerable, uneasy and hopelessly drawn to him all at the same time and all I could see in a future near him was heartache.

As I stepped into the lift and pressed the button for the seventh floor I decided to limit the chances I had of running into him by working out at the gym in the mornings before work. I already had my name down for my first session for a photography class the next evening which gave me the perfect excuse for skipping the gang's Friday night dinners. That left Tuesday and Thursday evenings as the only chances I would have to possibly run into Edward when my yoga classes coincided with his squash competition and practice nights. That wasn't too bad, I thought, and I would also work on maintaining a casual, friendly manner around him so I didn't telegraph my unsettled feelings regarding him and jeopardize the budding friendships I felt growing between me, Alice, Emmett and Rosalie.

As I left the lift and walked to my door I started to think about what I'd make for dinner, firmly shutting the lid on my thoughts about Edward Cullen until I saw him again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

_Bella is standing so close beside me in the gym's lift that I can feel her body heat burning my side. She turns towards me and gazes into my eyes, her eyes wary as she stares up at me. _

"_You are a goddess." I whisper and slowly trace her body with my eyes. _

_I return my eyes to hers and her expression has softened and warmed. I look down at her flushed face and see her mouth open slightly, wanting my kiss. I stare at her mouth, trying to guess if she wants feather light teasing brushes of my lips against hers or a searing hot open mouthed kiss with my tongue flicking once along her bottom lip to entice hers out to play too. I drag my eyes back to hers to read what she wants in her rich, chocolate eyes. _

_The elevator doors open and she takes a step to leave. I reach to stop her, my right arm snaking around under her breasts and my left hand catching her waist. I step forward to close the gap between our bodies to a sliver of space. I breathe in her scent of strawberries and vanilla and Bella… and arousal. _

_Bella arches her back, pressing her ass in her tight dark blue shorts back onto my hard cock and pushing her breasts tighter against my arm. _

"_Edward…" She moans. _

_I reach down into her top with my right hand to cup her breast and I drag my thumb across her hard nipple. _

"_Edward…" She moans. _

_I shove her shorts down with my left hand and then slide the flat of my hand across her stomach and down over her mound. I slip a finger into her hot, wet slit and gently smooth it in a circle around her clit. I press my finger in deeper and run it along the length of her because I can't help myself. My cock throbs impossibly bigger and painfully tighter. _

"_Bella…" I moan. _

_She presses back harder against my cock. I snatch my hand out of her top and quickly gather up her long, thick hair falling down her back and pull it forward over her right shoulder, exposing her neck and other shoulder to my mouth and tongue. I push my hand back into her top, grasping her breast tighter now, and I catch her nipple between the side of my thumb and forefinger, squeezing gently to gauge her reaction. _

"_Baby doll…" She whines, her voice higher and scratchier. _

_I freeze and then lift my mouth from her shoulder. I see her too heavy earring dragging the pierced hole in her earlobe down painfully. _

"_Chelsea?" I gasp and thrust myself away from her, stumbling backwards until I hit the back wall of the elevator._

I woke up gasping for breath and sweating hotly, my top sheet twisted uncomfortably around my legs and my cock rapidly collapsing to rest limply on my sweaty thigh. I lay staring up towards the ceiling in the dark until my breathing returned to normal and then glanced over at my alarm clock. There was only thirty minutes before my alarm was due to go off and so I got up and padded naked out into my kitchen to put a pot of coffee on. I stared blankly out of the window over the sink, not seeing the dark cityscape in front of me.

What the fuck was that dream about? I corrected myself then, what the fuck was that nightmare about?

I hadn't seen Chelsea in Bella once since our first meeting one week ago today, I brooded darkly. It was impossible to get confused between the two of them once you spent time with Bella where any superficial physical similarities were eclipsed by Bella's fascinating personality.

Bella was sweet, funny, smart, caring, natural, confident and aware of herself as a woman, shy, awkward, genuine, honest, direct and sexy. I snorted out loud in my silent apartment; I had just made her sound like she had a multiple personality disorder.

She fascinated me but she terrified me more. I had no defenses against her and that was what terrified me.

And that was what my sleeping brain was yelling at me, I decided, the nightmare symbolizing my fears by morphing Bella into the one girl who I had ever let hurt me.

I was more drawn to Bella than any woman I'd ever known; physically of course, to me she was the walking embodiment of sex and exuded an easy acceptance of her body, but also emotionally as well.

She had completely undone me at the juice bar last night when I'd been surprised to turn and find her kneeling at my feet, looking up at me along my body, her face level with my zipper. I'd frozen with my brain completely blank and my cock suddenly hard. I'd seen the flash of recognition and humor in her eyes when she had realized the cause of my stunned expression before she'd flicked her attention back to the clutter surrounding her purse. I'd known that her silent laughter hadn't been directed at me but instead at the unexpected and funny position we'd both been surprised with. Her easy acceptance of my automatic male response, without offence or indignation but instead with shared amusement, had enthralled me. Her attempt to keep what was a private and potentially awkward moment between just the two of us had enchanted me.

What scared me the most about Bella was how she easily saw past my carefully crafted façade that I wore around women; the self assured, cheeky, flirtatious front I had erected to keep the real me distant and safe. She saw through my bullshit and called me on it just by being her natural, comfortable and funny self.

On Wednesday evening, running beside her on the treadmill, I had caught her openly admiring me after I'd lifted my shirt to wipe away the sweat that had been dripping uncomfortably down my face and stinging when it ran into my eyes. I'd been amused to catch her staring at me like I'd been discretely staring at her. I'd also been secretly delighted that she found me attractive and I'd felt my chest puff out in boyish pride.

To cover my reaction I'd grinned cheekily back at her. She'd dropped her eyes away, blushing, and then calmly sipped her water and I had been impressed that she didn't dodge or deny the awareness that had sparked between us or start fluttering her eyelashes and simpering at me. Instead she'd rolled her eyes at my obvious, cheeky enjoyment of catching her perving on me and then smoothly tried to break the tension that was building between us. She'd told me I had looked tired and I couldn't understand how she knew my legs felt wooden and weak after a torturous lower body work out with Emmett and then ten minutes of matching her quick pace.

I'd slipped back to my comfort zone and had made a crack about being able to keep going all night and she had laughingly dismissed my flirting. She had then pierced me to my core by explaining that she'd meant I had looked tired after a bad day like she'd had too.

I had almost stopped dead and been spat off the back of the treadmill in shock and horror that she read me so easily. I had had a horrible day on top of too little sleep. In addition to my normal workload and too full schedule, I'd had to mediate a heated fight between Alice and Ben where they'd both stubbornly and childishly refused to find a middle ground until I was brought in, and then I'd had to sit in on the interviews to investigate sexual harassment and bullying allegations against one of our senior developers. I'd ended up the day not being able to remember why I had ever loved my job or the company I had started with Jasper in college.

I'd been shocked and horrified that she could see so quickly see past my façade after spending so little time with me and yet read me as easily and as accurately as my family and Jasper. I'd also been shocked by the implicit offer in her words to listen to me share about my bad day and in turn tell me about her day. No one except my mother offered me that kind of quiet, unassuming support; everyone else believed that I could handle anything and everything and that I never had days when I felt overwhelmed and exhausted. And I'd been most horrified by the almost overpowering urge I had to pour out my troubles and frustrations to her and then listen to and support her when she vented about her day.

I had panicked, unable to retreat behind my false walls but not able to bear her seeing any more of my vulnerability, and so I'd avoided her surprised and worried eyes while I battled to regain my composure.

Her quiet apology had further broken me apart and I'd wanted to snap at her for saying sorry. Then I had wanted to tell her that she had nothing to apologize for and that it was me who should be saying sorry for being so fucked up and scared and broken that I couldn't act like myself around her. I'd said nothing though and had kept on running beside her.

I'd been shocked again when she had suddenly broken our synchronized strides, her pace matching her rapidly slowing treadmill, and I had looked over at the side of her face in surprise and seen that she looked tired and defeated and my stomach had dropped with guilt. And like an idiot I had just run on, not reacting quickly enough to her leaving until she'd already stepped to the ground and said another quick farewell before walking away from me again. I'd quickly grabbed the bars on either side of me and jumped my feet to the sides of my treadmill and punched the kill switch but had been still forced to wait until I could get off safely.

I'd called after her to get her to wait for me, frustrated that I was again watching her back as she walked away when I wanted to say something to try to make things right between us, but she had just said goodnight over her shoulder and then sped up towards the door.

I'd chased after her and had seen her disappearing into the change rooms. I'd rushed through my shower and had hurried to get dressed and then burst out into the lobby to wait for her. I'd tried to play down my anxiousness to talk to her in front of Emmett but he'd seen right through me and had quietly told me that Bella had already left.

Emmett had taken me out for a beer then. We'd walked the one block down to our usual hangout and had sat at the bar side by side, watching a game on the flatscreen in front of us.

It wasn't until we'd each had our second beer in front of us that Emmett had lost patience in waiting for me to talk and, in typical Emmett fashion, had jumped right in.

"Do you still see Chelsea when you look at Bella?" He had asked, still watching the game.

"No, not since that first night." I had replied slowly, also watching the game.

He'd sighed in exasperation. "What was with the two of you rushing out of the change rooms like the place was on fire then?"

I'd run a hand through my hair in frustration then and had seen Emmett smile beside me at my easiest tell.

"She sees through all of my bullshit, Emmett." I had said. "She doesn't know me at all but she reads me like you can."

"That's not a bad thing." He had murmured.

I'd shrugged. "It felt like it tonight."

He had tried to wait me out again but hadn't lasted more than a minute before shooting a long look at my profile and then turning back to the game.

"I don't think it's a voodoo thing or special power that she has, Edward." He'd said.

I'd look over at him and waited for him to continue.

"I would guess that she's just very observant." He had shrugged and then smirked over at me. "Plus, when you don't have your Playa face on you're pretty easy to read. I would say that she knows you're upset or angry or whatever but doesn't know the reason."

"Playa?" I'd asked, miffed.

"Your game face, when you're cocky and invincible and nothing can touch you... or hurt you." He'd explained, watching the game again.

I'd stared at my beer in front of me for a long minute.

"I swore after Chelsea that I'd never let another girl hurt me again, that I'd never let another girl get close." I'd said softly, saying it aloud for the first time ever.

I'd felt Emmett staring at my profile for a longer minute.

"That's pretty sad, Edward." He'd said, turning back to the game.

"Yeah." I'd muttered. "It's never worried me until Bella."

I'd stared blindly at the flatscreen in front of us and then had looked back down at the beer clasped in my two hands.

"Fuck, Emmett." I'd muttered in despair. "I've spent no more than an hour and a half with her and I have an almost full blown panic attack because I can't stop her getting close to me."

"What would happen if you just let it happen?" He'd asked after a long pause. "If you were just yourself, cocky asshole and all, because that's a part of you now too?"

I'd stared at my beer some more, thinking hard.

"She'd know me, the real me, and not like me as much as I liked her." I'd said slowly.

"No, that's the worst that could happen." Emmett had disagreed, still watching the game.

"Okay then. She'd know me, the real me." I'd amended.

"And she'd be a lucky girl, Edward. And part of a very privileged club, not many people can say that." He'd said.

"She could still not like me as much as I like her." I'd said stubbornly.

"True… " He'd said easily and then continued more seriously. "That's the risk… But I think there's a higher risk of that if you keep trying to hide from her. As you said, she sees through your bullshit."

"True." I'd said, unconsciously parroting his words.

Emmet had returned his attention to the game then and I'd stared some more at my beer, thinking over our conversation.

"One thing I would recommend though is to give Bella a lot of space." He'd said, interrupting my thoughts.

"Yeah?" I'd responded absently.

"Yeah, you need to take advantage of the opportunities you have when she is near you but not chase her." He'd said. "I think that Bella is used to being alone or is very independent and if you crowd her or she's not comfortable then she'll retreat."

"She's always retreating; I'm getting sick of watching her walk away from me." I'd pouted.

"That's my point exactly." Emmett had said, rolling his eyes at my sulking. "You have to be ready to leave when she is because, like at dinner, one minute she's sitting there and the next second she's said polite farewells and she's on her way. She won't wait around for someone else to be ready to leave with her and she definitely won't be the one sitting there begging you to have one last drink for the road."

He'd returned his eyes to the TV and had then huffed a laugh. "She probably doesn't even go to the bathroom in pairs at clubs."

I'd huffed my own laugh at his joke but then returned to my quiet contemplation of my beer and our conversation.

"And if you've been the one to make her retreat then you'll have to wait until she's ready to come back." He'd added quietly.

"What if I've fucked things up too badly already?" I'd asked.

"Eh." He'd shrugged, dismissing my concern. "Then you'll have to wait until she's ready to come back." He'd repeated.

We'd sat in comfortable silence then for another couple of minutes until Emmett had turned to me and looked at me closely.

"Are we good?" He'd asked.

"Yeah, thanks Emmett." I'd replied, smiling ruefully.

"C'mon then, I've got a hot wife I need to get home to before she decides that I need to sleep on the sofa." He'd laughed.

We'd made our way out of the bar and bumped fists on the street before we'd separated knowing we'd see each other the next day.

I'd put Emmett's theory about Bella's abrupt exits to the test the next night after squash practice. I'd been ready to leave at a moment's notice and had quickly stood after she had and added my own excuse and goodbyes to hers. I had been amazed at how accurately Emmett had predicted her departure. I'd been amused at her awkwardness at our own delayed farewells. I'd been secretly excited to spend just a little more time with her. Mostly though I'd been hopeful that I would continue to have the strength and trust to be myself around Bella and allow whatever strange chemistry we had between us play its natural course.

I heard my alarm beep harshly from my bedroom and realized with a start that I had been blankly staring out the window, lost in thought, for thirty minutes. I shook off my daze, poured myself a coffee and took it into my bedroom to begin to get ready for another Friday at work.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

My work day flew. After a final review and walk through with Jasper of the contract addendum I'd completed last night, I'd sent the revised documentation off to the overnight couriers to be waiting for our Clients from Hell on Monday morning. Ben and I were flying down to Portland for the day next Friday to work out, and get sign off on, the final acceptance criteria for their system changes that we would start the following week. The rest of my day was spent attending weekly project status meetings and putting together a Tender response for a project that would start in the next quarter if we won the contract.

Before I knew it my Blackberry chirped a reminder at 6pm and it was time to head out with Ben, Jasper and Alice to walk down to the restaurant for our Friday night dinner. I packed up my laptop and shuffled out of my office, jamming my phone, wallet and keys into my pockets while trying to pull on my coat and juggle my laptop case at the same time. I almost bumped into Alice and Jasper as I turned to lock my office door behind me.

"Keen to leave tonight, little big brother?" Alice asked with a smirk.

I huffed a laugh at her. "Punctuality is very important, little sister." I said pompously, mocking my own eagerness.

We walked companionably over to the elevators where Ben was waiting for us and then all filed into the lift when it arrived.

"So Ben, it's just Angela tonight and no Bella, right?" Alice asked as we descended towards the lobby.

"Yep, Angie texted five minutes ago to say that she was leaving the office. Bella has started some photography thing on Friday nights and so she won't be meeting us." He shrugged easily.

I shot a quick look over at Ben but he seemed unconcerned by Bella's new plans that conveniently clashed with our regular dinner night. I then looked at Alice beside me, she was watching me and I could see that she also thought that Bella's absence wasn't a coincidence. I lifted one shoulder in a shrug and tried to smile at her but it came out twisted instead. She smiled a small smile back at me and briefly rested her tiny hand on my forearm.

"I'm going to have the white chocolate mousse tonight." She announced brightly to the lift in general, breaking the quiet, unobserved moment between us.

Jasper laughed and grabbed Alice back into his chest in a hug. "Then I'll order the black forest cake for you to eat half of also."

"And I'll order the gelato for you to finish with." I teased lightly, grateful for Alice's carefully orchestrated disclosure of Bella's impending absence before we reached the restaurant.

We all laughed, Alice's obsession with dessert was now legendary in our group.

We walked briskly to the restaurant, chatting about our plans to mitigate any future problems with our Clients from Hell, and settled at the table still discussing Ben's and my trip to Portland to meet in person with our main headaches on their team.

I smiled at Angela next to me as I slid into my seat at the head of our usual table that we sat at when it was just the seven of us. I was relieved to see no awkwardness in her answering smile and relaxed back into my chair, ready to enjoy a night of our group's usual banter and light conversation.

We talked easily as a group up until our main meals arrived and then were mostly quiet while we each enjoyed our meals. Rosalie and Angela started to tell us all about a new reality TV show that they'd both started watching after we had finished eating and were contentedly sitting back and relaxing with our mostly empty plates in front of us.

Angela's phone chirped to signal the arrival of a text message as our main meals were being cleared away and I watched her with amusement as she started pulling items out of her bag and placing them on the table in front of her as she rummaged for her phone. I was vividly reminded of Bella last night as she stuffed the contents of her bag back into her own purse as she tried to control her laughter kneeling at my feet in front of the juice bar at the gym.

Angela's snort of laughter broke into my daydream and I smiled over at her.

"Funny text?" I asked.

"Bella." She said as both an affirmative answer and an explanation.

I cocked an eyebrow with interest and waited to see if she'd say more. Instead she passed her phone to me so I could read the text message for myself.

_**Halp! Teach is a playa.  
I just threw up in my  
mouth a little. – B **_

I huffed a laugh myself as I read the text. I thought for a brief second and then looked consideringly at Angela.

"May I?" I asked as I held up the phone, asking permission to reply to the text.

Angela looked at me uneasily and I pushed my bottom lip out and turned on my big, sad eyes expression.

"Please, Angela?" I pleaded. "I'll be nice, I promise."

She looked at me for another long moment and then lifted one shoulder in a small shrug and nodded her permission.

I quickly typed out a reply and showed it to Angela before I pressed send, lifting my eyebrow at her to ask silently for permission to send my reply. She laughed lightly and happily nodded her okay.

_**U want me 2  
come & show  
him how a real  
playa rolls?  
– Edward **_

I placed Angela's phone on the table between us and waited anxiously for a reply, pretending to be listening to Jasper's and Ben's recounting of their squash games on Tuesday night to Rosalie.

After a long five minutes Angela's phone chirped again and I looked at it on the table and then at Angela, wanting to open the message but not wanting to commandeer her phone completely. Angela puffed out a sigh and rolled her eyes, nudging her phone towards me to open.

_**Nah, its ok.  
Kinda funny  
once ur past  
the nausea  
– B **_

The phone chirped again while I was reading her text and so I looked over at Angela again to ask permission to open the new message. She rolled her eyes once again and nodded but then held out her hand palm up towards me. Confused, I placed her phone into her hand.

"_Your_ phone, Edward" She sighed in exasperation, handing me back her phone without looking at it.

"Oh, sorry." I laughed, pulling my Blackberry out of my suit jacket's inner pocket and placing it onto Angela's outstretched palm.

Angela bent over my phone with a frown creasing her brow and I watched her for a minute before opening the new text that had arrived.

_**E, pls tell A that  
we WILL speak  
about this later.  
kthxbai – B **_

I laughed again and looked up at Angela, ready to show her the text. She was holding out my phone to me with one hand and holding up her other hand to ask for her own phone back. We exchanged phones and I looked to see what she had done to mine and saw that she had added Bella Swan into my contacts.

"Gee, thanks Edward." She muttered, reading the text, but then laughed over at me.

We both bent our heads back over our phones and started typing out new messages. I was uneasy about Bella having to fend off a sleaze and so typed a more serious text to her but couldn't resist calling her Arizona in shorthand.

_**Az, pls let me  
know if u do  
need help – E **_

I placed my phone on the table beside me and then looked up as our waitress arrived to take our dessert orders.

"I'll have the white chocolate mousse, Jasper will have the black forest gateau and Edward will have the strawberry cheesecake." Alice said composedly to the waitress. "And can we please have two extra plates?" She asked sweetly.

I laughed over at Alice at the other end of the table and then jumped slightly as my phone vibrated to alert me to a new text message. I stared down at it while I waited for the waitress to finish taking everyone's orders.

"Coffee, Edward?" Rosalie's sharp voice penetrated my focus on my phone.

"Huh? Um, sorry, yes thanks. Can I please have an espresso?" I responded, turning to the waitress, and then sheepishly met Alice's and Rosalie's knowing smirks with my own smile.

My phone vibrated with the arrival of a second message and I grabbed it quickly and held it in my lap to read the waiting texts.

_**Its ok. I'd ask  
if u knew any  
good lines 2  
shoot down a  
playa but dont  
think u hear 2  
many – B **_

I coughed a laugh and quickly replied, smiling down at my phone as I typed and then pressed Send.

_**No not many, sorry.  
I can ask Rose 4 u  
if u want? – E **_

I opened the second text that had arrived.

_**Srsly, E, u sunk  
2 using puppy  
dog eyes on A?  
– B **_

I frowned down at my phone now, not sure how to reply. I slowly tapped out my reply and hesitated before sending it but then shrugged and pressed Send before I changed my mind.

_**She wouldnt have  
let me reply if I  
hadnt pulled out  
the big guns. – E **_

I waited nervously for a reply to my texts as the minutes stretched by. Our coffees and desserts arrived and I placed my phone on to the table so I could split my cheesecake in half and pass Alice's share around the table to her on one of the spare plates she'd requested.

I sipped my coffee and tried to eat my cheesecake but the strawberries reminded me of Bella and I started to flick worried glances at my phone every minute or so. Finally it vibrated to signal a new message and I snatched it up to read the text.

_**Class over! in  
taxi on way home.  
RE big guns, its ok,  
A liked it. – B **_

I thought for a minute about my reply. I didn't want to fall into the trap of swapping flirtatious texts that could cause either of us to feel too awkward when we next met. I quickly typed out a reply and sent it and then set my phone back on the table.

_**Cool, pls let me  
know when u  
get home safe.  
– E **_

I forced myself to pay attention to Jasper's conversation and realized he was talking about organizing a trip up to Whistler for a long weekend this year. I pushed my thoughts about Bella to the back of my mind and joined in the discussion, excited about maybe being able to spend one weekend without worrying about work even if it wasn't for a couple of months.

I was halfway home, walking the six blocks back to my apartment, when I felt my phone vibrate against my body. I pulled it out and smiled when I saw I had a new message from Bella Swan.

_**Home at last.  
Goodnight, E  
– B **_

I tapped out a reply as I walked and sent it quickly and then slipped my phone back into my pocket.

_**Sweet dreams, Az.  
– E **_

I was happy that I had gotten the chance to interact with Bella tonight and take another small step towards repairing the shaky start to our friendship, or whatever it was that was building between us.


	7. Chapter 7

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

_I'm kneeling on the floor looking for my phone and I can't see it anywhere. I grope around on the ground for it, searching with my hands, but I can't feel it anywhere. I have lost my phone. _

_I see Edward's feet turn towards me and I sit back on my heels. I take a deep breath and tell him I've lost my phone. I know he will be angry. I look up along his body to gaze at his face. His brow is smooth, his mouth relaxed and slightly open, his eyes are burning but they are not angry; his green eyes are dark and hungry like a starving man's. _

_I reach out and lay one hand on his thigh and it feels like stone under his dark denim jeans._

"_Bella." He murmurs and his velvet voice holds secrets and laughter._

_I smile up at him now, I know what we both want. I reach with my other hand and run my flat palm firmly up along the button fly of his jeans, rubbing the length of his hard cock. I ease open all of the buttons on his jeans and find his bare, hard length ready for my mouth. I press a wet, open mouthed kiss to his aroused head and flick my tongue across its ridge. _

"_Bella." He moans and his husky voice holds no secrets and no lies. _

_I ease his jeans down off his hips and drag them to his knees. I grasp his hilt in one hand and again reach out to steady myself against his thigh with the other. I push my lips down over him and swirl my tongue against him before slowly sucking back off his length._

"_Bella." He groans and his raw voice rasps against my soul. _

_I tighten my lips and push them further down over his length and suck strongly back to his head to tongue around him. _

"_Arizona, that's your phone." Edward says, pointing behind me, and I hear it ringing and release him to turn and grab it up before I lose it again._

I woke up with a start, not knowing what woke me up so suddenly and so completely. I knew I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep again so I rolled over to blearily to find out what time it was, nine o' clock on Saturday morning. I groaned and then rolled onto my back and stared up at the ceiling and thought back to my dream, Edward, blow jobs and phones, what a combination. Dreaming of Edward wasn't new, I'd been doing that for the last week, but the explicit sex dream was a new development. I looked over at my night stand to where I'd left my phone and I knew what had woken me up then. I had a new text message.

I reached over a grabbed my phone and opened up the waiting text.

_**Beautiful day,  
sun is shining.  
I thought of  
Arizona. – E**_

I didn't know if I should growl or squeal into my pillow like a teenager with a crush when I read Edward's text. I got up and went to the bathroom before deciding to answer his stupid, sleep in blocking text. I typed and sent a reply quickly.

_**U did NOT just  
wake me up  
to talk about  
the freakin'  
sun! – B**_

I stumbled out into my kitchen to put on coffee and then remembered that I was out of coffee and almost wept. I decided to go downstairs to the café next door for my morning caffeine hit before trying to function any further. I went and washed my face, brushed my teeth and dragged a brush through my hair and started to feel more human. I returned to my bedroom and quickly stripped out of my pajamas and pulled on clean underwear, my favorite worn jeans, a snug long sleeve t-shirt and an oversized hoodie. I rummaged in my closet for my old Sun Devils baseball cap and tugged it on, pulling my hair through its back like a ponytail holder. I found my sunglasses in my purse and put them on and then shoved my feet into my red converse without socks and left them untied. I grabbed my wallet, phone and keys and stuffed them into my hoodie's pockets as I walked out of my apartment, pulling the door shut behind me.

My phone chimed loudly in my pocket as I waited for the elevator. I pulled out my phone and opened the waiting message.

_**Sorry :(**_

I frowned down at Edward's text, not knowing how to respond to it. He had disarmed me last night with his texted offer of help if I actually did need it fending off the lecherous Riley. I'd known that Edward would have left his dinner to come to me if I'd needed him and that had melted my resolve to avoid him wherever and however possible. I'd known that he would have offered to do the same for Alice, Rosalie or Angela but it had given me hope that I could rely on that caring man even when his moods shifted and I had to struggle to keep up with those changing moods.

I stepped into the lift when it arrived, still looking at my phone in my hand, wondering if I even needed to respond to his text. Finally I puffed out my breath and tapped in a quick reply and pressed Send.

_**Its ok, but  
pls not b4  
11am next  
time – B **_

I stepped out of the lift and walked quickly out of the front door of my building, now very eager for coffee. I abruptly stopped as I turned towards the café next door; Edward was sitting at one of the small tables on the sidewalk, his long legs stretched out with his feet resting on the metal chair across from him. His bronze hair was tousled and shining mahogany and red and gold in the sun, his eyes were covered by mirrored aviator sunglasses and he was smiling down at his phone in his hand. He looked younger and more relaxed today in a dark maroon t-shirt that deliciously hugged his chest and shoulders, loose sweat pants and sneakers. I awkwardly felt like I was intruding on a private moment as I watched him and so I slipped past his table into the café to get my coffee before I stopped back to say hello.

My phone chimed while I waited to order and pay for my coffee and I quickly opened the waiting text.

_**11? how about  
10am? – E **_

I rolled my eyes and then stepped to the counter, pointing outside to Edward's table when I ordered, suddenly changing my mind and ordering a sit down coffee rather than the to-go order I had planned.

After I ordered I pushed out of the door back onto the street and then lightly stepped over to stand behind Edward. He had crossed his arms across his chest and had tilted his head back to bask in the sunshine. I lightly tapped one shoulder while I stepped past his other shoulder and moved to stand behind the free chair at his table.

"Arizona!" I couldn't see his eyes behind his mirrored sunglasses but his voice sounded surprised and, maybe, pleased.

"Is this seat taken?" I asked, gesturing at his feet still resting on the chair in front of me.

"No, sorry." He muttered and quickly lifted his feet of the seat and sat forward.

He reached across under the table and pulled my chair around to the side of the table, brushing ineffectively where his shoes had rested.

"I was saving it for you." He joked.

I huffed a laugh and then slipped into the seat, placing my phone on the table in front of me. After watching me for a moment Edward leaned back once more and then lifted his legs and laid his calves across my thighs, tipping his face up to the sun again.

"That's much better." He sighed happily.

I looked over at him and smiled in response to the small, contented smile lifting his mouth. I studied him for the long minute of silence that fell between us. He really was a beautiful man, I thought in wonder, taking in his straight nose, strong jaw now rough with stubble and full, deep rose lips.

"So, Arizona, what brings you out so early on this beautiful Seattle sunshiney day?" He teased.

"Coffee." I answered shortly and fought to hide my smile in response to his light laugh.

"Yeah?" He prompted, obviously teasing and pushing me to say more.

"Yeah, some asshole texted me before the sparrows were awake and woke me up from my dream." I pouted, hamming it up.

His musical laugh did strange things to my stomach and I looked away from him and gazed along the street, fixing my focus on a couple as they walked their dog.

"You were dreaming?" He asked and paused. "Did I have my clothes on, Arizona?" He asked wickedly and I could hear the lazy, knowing, crooked smile in his voice.

I flashed a glance at him from out of the side of my sunglasses and saw he'd dipped his chin to turn his cocky smirk on me and I decided to see if I could play Edward the Playa.

"Mostly." I murmured and shrugged easily, still looking down the street.

I swallowed my laugh when I felt his legs tense in my lap and I turned a small, calm smile in his direction. His smile had faded slightly and eyebrows had lifted just above the rims of his sunglasses. And Snap! I thought to myself and coughed over the laugh I couldn't contain anymore.

"Here you go, Edward." A high, breathy voice intruded into our space.

I looked up and saw the waitress setting down two bowls, a plate and a mug in front of Edward. I looked curiously at Edward's breakfast and saw that he had ordered muesli with yoghurt, fruit salad and raisin bread with his coffee.

"Your coffee?" The waitress's voice was now sharper and I glanced up and saw she was holding my coffee but still watching Edward avidly.

"Uh, thanks." I said and reached up to grab the mug before she emptied it on me by trying to place it in front of me without dragging her eyes away from Edward.

I looked over at Edward and saw that he was watching me with a small crooked smile and ignoring our waitress's blatant attention. I smiled briefly and then took an eager gulp of my coffee. I sighed contentedly and sat back in my chair, placing one hand on Edward's shin on my lap.

"Shit, sorry Arizona." He said and quickly but carefully lifted his legs off my thighs and set his feet on the ground, sitting forward properly at the table.

I took another long sip of my coffee and suddenly felt hungry at the sight of Edward's food.

"I'll be right back." I promised him and pushed back from my chair, walking quickly into the café again.

I ordered and paid for two more coffees to be brought to our table, asking if they knew Edward's usual order which they did, and bought a blueberry muffin to go so that I could take it back to the table with me. I then walked back outside to our table and slipped into my seat, pulling my muffin out and setting it on top of its paper bag in front of me. I saw that Edward hadn't started eating yet.

"You don't mind if I start, do you?" I asked, breaking my muffin apart and raising a small chunk towards my mouth.

"Of course not." He said. "Sorry, I had already ordered." He muttered.

I looked over at him with surprise and saw that he looked uncomfortable.

"Edward, please. Firstly, I was the one to crash your quiet breakfast in the sunshine, and secondly, it is not your fault that the waitress was too busy committing lewd acts against your person with her eyes to ask if I wanted to order anything." I said.

I waved my hand at his food to encourage him to start and popped the piece of muffin I was still holding into my mouth. I chewed quickly and sipped more coffee. Edward pulled his muesli towards himself and started to eat, a small frown still creasing his brow.

"So have you visited Arizona to be reminded of it by a clear, sunny day, Edward?" I asked, curious to find out if his text this morning was just a line.

"Twice, both times for conferences in Phoenix. The last one was about four years ago now." He said and then ate another mouthful. "Both conferences were in the summertime and I thought I was going to suffocate because of the lack of humidity whenever I stepped outside away from air conditioning."

I smiled, remembering the harsh, dry heat of Phoenix and tore off another piece of muffin and raised it to my mouth.

"Both times I flew out on a dark and rainy morning and stepped out of the plane into the brightest sunshine… It was like starting over; stepping into a new, different day than the one I had left on." He shrugged.

I finished my muffin and sat back with my coffee, thinking about the wide skies and bright sun of Arizona. Edward ate quietly and I tried not to stare at his graceful, efficient movements. I thought on his words and how I suspected his playboy exterior hid a deeper, more poetic man.

Just as I finished my coffee I heard the café door open and glanced over my shoulder to see our waitress moving in our direction with two coffees.

"Protect your virtue, Edward. She's coming back." I muttered and he stiffened, flashing a startled glance at me.

"Another coffee, Edward." Our waitress breathed. "It's hot and fresh just how you like it."

I bit my lip hard to stop my laugh at her attempt at seductive innuendo as she placed our two coffees down onto the table. I looked along the street again to avoid looking at Edward because I knew I'd laugh no matter what his reaction was to her heavy handed flirting.

"Er, thanks." Edward said, sounding flustered.

I bit down on my lip harder and buried my nose in my new coffee as she cleared our empty plates and mugs away.

When I trusted myself not to laugh I glanced over at him and saw he was watching me wearing his small, crooked smile and the faintest blush high on his cheeks. He shrugged ruefully and I smiled warmly and watched as his smile grew wider.

"Um, thanks for the coffee, Arizona?" He asked, unsure, raising his mug to me.

I shrugged easily. "I definitely need a two coffee start this morning. And your breakfast was way too healthy; I was just trying to balance it out for you." I smirked over at him.

"Hey, my body is a temple, Arizona." He blustered, his mock seriousness ruined by his relaxed, playful smile.

I looked down the street, dragging my eyes across Edward's muscular chest and toned shoulders and arms as my gaze swept past him, and swallowed as I thought about how I'd gladly worship at his temple. I blushed as I thought back to my dream this morning and shifted slightly on my seat and I was glad I was wearing my own dark sunglasses.

"You're interested in photography, Arizona." Edward stated and I heard amusement in his velvet voice.

"Yeah." I paused briefly. "Last night's course was going to cover shooting the city at nighttime."

"Was?" He prompted gently.

I stared down at the table unhappily. "The class was a bit of a bust... I don't think I'll go back for round two of… Eh, never mind." I shrugged uneasily, dismissing what I was going to say.

I smiled brightly over at him, covering my disappointment at how badly my evening had gone. I'd spent the whole class trying to dodge the advances of the sleazy instructor, Riley, and had vowed to change to a different class on another night or a try to swap my enrolment into a different course altogether. Edward's mirrored sunglasses were fixed on my face, his jaw was clenched and a frown creased his brow. I turned my gaze down the street again, avoiding his intensity, and wished that I'd just brushed off his casual question as lightly as he had asked it.

My phone chirped with an incoming message and I snatched it up, grateful for the distraction.

_**What time  
for lunch?  
– A**_

I quickly typed out a reply and sent it, avoiding looking at Edward.

_**1pm? – B**_

I sat fidgeting in my seat with my phone lightly clasped in my hand in my lap, looking everywhere else but at Edward. My phone chirped again and I opened the new message quickly.

_**1pm! Ben says  
ur going down  
at GuitarHero  
– A**_

I snorted a laugh and looked up embarrassed at Edward. He'd relaxed into his seat and tilted his head back to catch the sunshine again and looked young and carefree again.

"Angela?" He asked lazily.

"Yeah, I'm going over for lunch. She passed on Ben's trash talk, he is such a dork." I laughed.

I finished my coffee in one huge swallow and set my mug down on the table, pushing back my chair and standing up ready to say goodbye.

"Will I see you at the gym on Monday?" Edward asked and he sounded languid and relaxed.

I looked down the street as I briefly considered his question. I had planned to change my routine to avoid chances of running into Edward but I felt differently now after sharing this fun, comfortable breakfast with him and swapping texts with him last night.

"Yeah, I'll probably get there just after six." I said and I thought I heard him exhale quietly as he leaned forward to sit up straighter.

"See you on Monday, Arizona." He smiled over at me.

"Thanks for letting me share the sunshine with you this morning, Edward." I smiled back. "See you on Monday."

I imagined I could feel him watching me as I walked away but when I glanced over as I turned into my building he was again basking in the sun with his face tipped up to take advantage of the warm golden rays.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

Back in my apartment I started proofreading a new manuscript but pushed it aside after I'd read the same paragraph three times without taking in a word, daydreams of Edward intruding and breaking my concentration. I ended up making a grocery list , putting on a load of laundry and cleaning the bathroom and kitchen until it was time to catch a taxi over to Angela's and Ben's house.

I made one quick stop on the way over at a print shop, picking up the two posters I'd had made up ready for the second and, hopefully, final round in my prank war with Emmett. I didn't think he would be able to top this effort and I snickered to myself when I tried to guess how he'd react when my prank was discovered.

I spent the early afternoon catching up with Angela, discussing work more than any other topic but also exchanging news on our families and mutual friends from college. I told her all about my disastrous Photography class and how I wanted to change out of the course. We talked a little bit about the Cullens and Hales and I casually mentioned that I'd run into Edward at breakfast but deflected Angela's eager interest, wanting to process my thoughts and feelings more in private before I shared just how deeply I was starting to be effected by the beautiful, changeable Edward Cullen.

Ben arrived home after a half day in the office and beat me comprehensively at GuitarHero, winning the title of 'Reigning King and Conquering Legend of GuitarHero and all things Cool' for the next week. I barked the skin off my knees being silly while playing and left the apartment with wet cheeks and sore sides from laughing so much with Angela and Ben.

I made myself pasta for dinner and after a bath I curled up on my couch with the manuscript I'd set aside earlier. I worked until my eyes saw red ink corrections dancing across the page and then dragged myself to my room and collapsed into bed, too exhausted to think about Edward.

I woke up the next morning not remembering any of my dreams and feeling refreshed. I remembered that I still hadn't gone grocery shopping and so decided to buy a takeaway coffee from the café downstairs on my way to the gym to start Operation Prank Emmett. I would go grocery shopping on the way home from the gym and spend the afternoon finishing the manuscript I had made a good start on last night.

I showered and dressed in jeans, a faded University of Arizona t-shirt covered by an open flannelette shirt and the same hoodie I wore yesterday morning at breakfast. I again wore my worn baseball cap and sunglasses. I filled my pockets with my wallet, keys and phone and rummaged in the kitchen for my string market bags for my shopping. Passing to the front door of my apartment, I grabbed up my posters and tucked them under my arm and snagged up the roll of double-sided tape I'd bought last week.

I quickly made my way down to the street and then almost skipped the two blocks to the gym, brimming with suppressed glee at my cunning plan. I walked past the doors at the gym twice, looking in to make sure that Emmett wasn't anywhere that I could see and finally walked in and approached the front desk where there was a young, muscular man that I hadn't seen before.

"Hi, can I put some posters up for my band's upcoming gig?" I asked, flapping my hand at the wall behind us where Emmett allowed bars and bands to paste their posters and give the lobby an industrial, grunge-ish vibe.

"Sure." The young guy said, not even looking up at me.

"Cool, thanks man." I breathed, unable to believe I was going to get away with actually doing this.

I quickly stepped to the wall and unrolled my posters, judging where they'd have the most impact. I applied double-sided tape to the back of the first poster and stuck it up on the wall. I then stepped ten feet down the wall and stuck up the second poster and then shoved the roll of unused double sided tape into my pocket.

"Thanks man!" I called over my shoulder as I quickly stepped to the sliding doors out to the street.

I was already celebrating my clean getaway as I almost jogged to the door, with my chin tucked down and the brim of my hat pulled low over my face, when I collided with an iron wall of muscle and bounced off the immoveable mass. Strong hands reached out and grabbed my biceps, catching and steadying me before I hit the floor. I could feel the heat of the hands through my multiple layers and knew it was Edward without looking.

"Arizona?" He asked startled, stepping closer.

"Shh! I'm in disguise." I hissed.

"What?" He asked again, his laugh sounding shocked.

I started to to squirm to get out of his grip but stopped when I felt my hip bump against him and my breast brush against his wrist. I didn't need to know what it was like to rub and grind against Edward's hard, lean body. I settled for peering around him and looking around the lobby to make sure no one was watching us.

"Edward, you are ruining my getaway. Let me go!" I hissed again.

"I don't want to know, do I?" He laughed now.

"No. Now let me go! I'll see you tomorrow." I muttered.

He released me and I smirked up at him before scuttling to the door, hearing his laugh ring out behind me as I pulled up the hood on my sweatshirt. I flapped my hand behind me to try and shush his musical laugh and then waved at him when I saw he was still watching me as I turned out of the building towards the downtown grocery shop where I had to do my shopping.

I spent thirty minutes at the grocery store stocking up for the week and then carried my heavy bags home. The rest of my Sunday was absorbed by the manuscript and household chores until I found myself finishing my ironing at ten o'clock at night, tired and with a brain that felt like mush. I changed into my pajamas and clambered into bed, welcoming the oblivion of sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

Monday morning was spent in a workshop to select new novels from our submissions short queue. My entire department and the heads of Volturi Publishing were present and I was secretly delighted when the manuscript I pitched was selected for publishing. The author was a young man who had perfectly blended a wry humor with the angst of unrequited love in his story and although his work was rough I could already sense that it would be successful when it hit the bookstores.

After lunch I finally was able to schedule my meeting with Jane Alexander, conceding to meet with her in Maple Valley on Wednesday afternoon. I spent the next thirty minutes organizing a pool car to drive there with and then walking down to Payroll to pick up the reimbursement forms I would need to claim back my expenses from my half day of travelling.

Back in my office I found myself thinking about Edward. I remembered the magnetic, sexually charged man in the elevator last Thursday and the confident, self aware man leaning against the juice bar as every woman's eyes were drawn to him on the same night. I compared that man with the relaxed, carefree man on Saturday and knew that I was helpless to resist him. He fascinated me and I was drawn to him unlike I'd ever been drawn to any man before him. I still saw heartache for me in my future near him, the change in him on Saturday made me think that he was starting to accept me as a friend and wasn't interested in more. I guessed that if he was interested in more with me then there'd be no way to slow or deflect his attentions and I almost wished he would sweep me away with him, even if it was just for a short lived, steamy romance.

Siobhan, another senior Editor, interrupted my musings, wanting to work through the plot and character development issues she was having with the manuscript she was proofing. We spent the rest of the afternoon working through the inconsistencies and discussing solutions.

Finally at six o'clock I happily packed up my messenger bag and walked lightly to the lifts, looking forward to my workout at the gym. I was excited to see Edward and nervous to find out if Emmett had discovered my prank and I could barely contain my pace to a brisk walk as I weaved through the early evening pedestrian traffic for the four blocks to the gym.

I turned into the lobby at Pump and saw Emmett at the front desk talking to two men in business suits, I flicked a glance at the wall and saw the posters were still up and snickered quietly. Edward was leaning back at the other end of the reception desk, obviously waiting for Emmett to finish with his customers.

I glanced at him as I stopped at the front desk to show my membership card to Jessica and get a locker key, he was frowning at the wall behind me and I groaned internally as I thought I must have tipped him off with my quick check on my posters. I saw him frown back at me and I quickly turned my eyes away, smiling at Jessica as she handed me my locker key.

I walked quickly into the change room, seeing from the corner of my eye that Edward was again frowning at the postered wall opposite the front desk. I changed quickly into my yoga pants, a wifebeater over my sports bra and a light cotton hoodie. I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and grabbed my iPod from my purse, pulled on my shoes and socks and then shut my bags into my locker. I stepped lightly to the door out into the lobby, selecting my 'Bow Chicka Wow Wow' playlist as it fit my mood tonight before pushing out through the door.

I saw Emmett had stepped around the desk and looked to be finishing up with the two men. Edward had straightened off the desk and he looked over at me when I walked out, slowly shaking his head and smiling widely. I knew then that he'd discovered my prank and I couldn't help my huge smile back in return. He stepped quickly to my side and began walking with me towards the exercise room.

"Arizona, you are a very brave woman." He drawled and then chuckled.

I shrugged lightly. "Not if he doesn't see them." I returned quietly.

I looked over my shoulder to see Emmett following us now and quickly faced forwards again, trying to not look suspicious. Edward laughed lightly and looked like he was about to say something more. Instead, after a pause, he reached over and plucked my iPod from my hand.

"Hey! Edward don't." I protested, trying to snatch it back.

"I'll dock this into the speaker system." He said and jogged ahead, pushing through the doors into the exercise room.

Emmett caught up with me and we walked into the room behind Edward in silence. I saw Edward pause in mid stride as he moved to the front window and flash a startled look at me over his shoulder. I unhappily avoided his eyes, embarrassed by the stupid name of the playlist I'd selected tonight.

"Have a good workout, Bella." Emmett said. "Come and join us for our cool down, if you feel like it."

"Thanks, Emmett." I said distractedly, cringing as Kings of Leon's Sex on Fire started playing loudly and I saw Edward jogging back towards us with a huge smug smirk on his handsome face.

"See ya." I muttered and quickly walked away, threading a path through the ellipticals well out of the way of Edward's return path.

I walked over to my usual treadmill in the middle of the front window and quickly did some basic stretches before climbing onto the machine and punching the speed up until my strides fit between the tempo of the song now pounding through the speakers. I pulled my hood forward and tried to forget my embarrassment and get lost in the music and my rhythmic stride. I ran for forty minutes and then slowed my treadmill down to a brisk walk to cool down with for ten minutes. I eventually stopped the machine and carefully stepped down, making my way over to the water cooler to grab a drink of water.

I saw Edward and Emmett doing crunches on the mats at the back of the room and slowly made my way over to them. I wanted to get my iPod before leaving but didn't want to mess with the gym's sound system and so I'd have to ask Edward to return it.

".Us." Emmett puffed between sit ups.

I pulled off my hoodie and sunk down onto the mat beside him. I started to stretch, loosening the slight tightness I felt in my legs after my run.

"Nine hundred and ninety-eight. Nine hundred and ninety-nine. One thousand." Edward muttered through his final sit ups and then collapsed back onto the mat, breathing heavily.

I huffed a laugh. "Yeah right." I scoffed.

Emmett laughed too and collapsed back on to the mat beside me. I kept stretching, breathing though any soreness as I waited until I felt the tightness in my muscles ease.

"Fuck you're flexible, Bella." Emmett muttered and I glanced over quickly and saw that he had started stretching also and had his head bent towards his knees as he reached forwards to his toes.

"Yoga." I explained shortly.

We were quiet as we kept stretching, I watched Edward out of the corner my eye marveling as he slowly moved through his stretches and noticing the occasional grimace that would flash across his face when he would move into a new stretch.

"Edward says this was your music." Emmett broke our silence. "It's good music for a workout. Lots of Kings of Leon"

I froze for a second and then started to laugh weakly. I quickly moved to my final stretch and leaned forward, resting my head on my knees as I clasped the bottom of my feet, feeling the pull in the back of my thighs and back.

"Yep, it's good music for a workout." I agreed into my knees.

I sat back up and then slowly stood, avoiding looking at Edward. I glanced over uneasily at the front corner of the room where Edward had taken my iPod.

"I'll bring it out to you, Arizona." Edward promised.

"Okay. See you after we get changed." I said and made my way out to the change room.

I showered and changed quickly and walked back out into the lobby. Edward and Emmett weren't anywhere to be seen and so I went to wait on the black leather couch under the posters. I pulled out the manuscript I had been working on over the weekend and flicked to the chapter that I was still uneasy about, reading through the opening passage that I felt didn't flow into the following passages.

"Good book, Arizona?" Edward's velvet voice asked.

"It's getting there." I muttered, still frowning down at the page in front of me.

I shook off my focus and looked up at him and smiled involuntarily back at him. He was wearing a white button-down long-sleeved shirt and my favorite dark blue jeans that had starred in my recent dream of him. His hair was still wet and tousled and he smelt like soap and sandalwood and fresh linen. I dropped my eyes back down and hurriedly pushed the manuscript back into my messenger bag slinging its strap over my shoulder along with the strap of my gym bag.

I stood up and held out my hand, silently asking for my iPod back. He handed it over solemnly and I tucked it into my purse without looking directly at him. I started to feel awkward in the silence that stretched between us and I quickly glanced at him. He was watching me closely with his lazy, crooked smile quirking up one corner of his mouth.

"It was an interesting playlist, Arizona." He murmured. "Different to what I expected."

"Whatever, Edward." I muttered, dropping my eyes and feeling a blush rise hotly in my cheeks.

"No really, Arizona. It was very good at… uh… setting a mood." He chuckled.

I rolled my eyes; trust Edward to push the point I thought to myself. I flicked a glance at him and saw that his crooked grin had widened and I decided abruptly to try to turn the tables on him again. I smoothly took one step closer to him, invading his personal space.

"C'mon Edward, you know you have music for the exact same reason." I murmured softly, leaning up towards his ear.

I brought my hand up to touch my finger to my lips thoughtfully, barely brushing it against his shirt, and pretended to frown in concentration.

"I think yours would be jazz. Smooth, languid, decadent… and maybe a little dark." I breathed.

I watched him swallow, his throat close to my eyes as I stretched up, and smothered the laugh I felt bubbling up in my chest. I took a step back from him and smiled slowly up at him. Edward seemed to be frozen in place, his smile gone.

"Okay, kids! Let's get out of here." Emmett boomed behind us. "I have to pick up pizza to take home."

I stepped quickly around Edward and walked lightly over to Emmett, happy that he had interrupted our moment before Edward had been able to react because I knew I had been playing with fire.

"Which pizza place are you going to, Emmett?" I asked as I reached his side.

"Sam's, down the block from here." He replied.

"Excellent, I'll grab dinner there so I don't have to cook." I said lightly.

"Edward, are you coming?" Emmett called over to him.

"Uh yeah, sure, Emmett." He said, sounding distracted.

I bit down on my lip to stop my laughter and avoided looking at Edward as he slowly turned towards us and followed us out on to the street. I walked down the street beside Emmett as Edward trailed behind us until we reached Sam's Pizzeria and we pushed in through the door. I held the door open for Edward and he flicked a smile at me as he walked in behind me.

"Bella! " Sam called as soon as he saw me. "How are you tonight? Can I make you a Bella Special?"

I laughed and nodded and stepped back while Emmett and Edward ordered.

"Another special, Arizona?" Edward asked quietly at my side after he'd ordered. "Do you have every man wrapped around your little fingers?"

I looked at him carefully, wanting to tell him that the exact opposite was true of me. Instead, I shrugged uneasily and turned my face over to where Emmett was joking with Sam as he ordered his takeaway.

"I order the same thing every time." I muttered. "Sam teases me a lot and started calling it the Bella Special." I finished uncomfortably.

"Bella, I thought I made the only Bella Special." Emmett pouted as he walked back to us from the counter.

"But yours is the best, Emmett." I assured him lightly and then bit my lip unhappily as I realized how that could sound after Edward's comment.

I stood uncomfortably beside Edward, worrying about what he'd implied about me manipulating men. I shifted uneasily from foot to foot and resettled the straps of my bags on my shoulder before putting my gym bag and messenger bag on the floor between my feet. I opened my purse to find my money to pay for my pizza and then pulled out my keys and pushed them into my jeans pocket ready to open my door with later while I juggled my bags and pizza.

"Bella, Rosalie tells me you have a birthday coming up." Emmett said.

I glanced up and thought I caught Emmett looking over my head at Edward. I flicked a glance between the two of them but decided I must have imagined the look that passed between them.

"Um, yes, not this week but the Thursday after." I responded.

"Are you having a party?" He asked.

"No, I don't do parties." I laughed. "We are going to go out and observe some traditions though."

"That sounds like mischief in the making, Bella." Emmett chuckled beside me.

"Yeah." I sighed happily, remembering past birthdays with Angela.

"Um, of course you're both invited." I said after a pause, looking up at Emmett and then across to Edward. "It will be fairly low key, we'll just be at a bar somewhere that serves food and has a jukebox or a band playing."

"You should go to the bar around the corner from the gym, Bella." Emmett suggested. "It's good there."

"Okay. Though usually we try and pick somewhere where it doesn't matter if we're too embarrassed to go back to later." I said carefully.

"Count me in, Bella." Emmett laughed, clapping his hands together. "This I have to see. And I don't do embarrassed so it'll be fine."

"I'm in too, Arizona." Edward said quietly beside me.

"Cool, I think Alice, Jasper and Rosalie are coming. And of course Angela and Ben will be there. It should be fun." I said.

Sam called our orders and we filed up to pickup and pay for our pizzas. I got to the door first and held it for Emmett and Edward and stepped lightly out onto the street beside them as they said their goodbyes.

"See you tomorrow, Bella." Emmett smiled down at me.

"See you tomorrow." I confirmed, smiling back at him.

Edward stepped to my side and we turned together and started to walk towards our apartments. We paused to wait for the lights at the end of the block and Edward turned towards me.

"I was trying to tease you earlier… about the special order. It came out differently to how it was intended, sorry." He said quietly.

"Oh, that's okay." I mumbled.

I looked up at him and he was smiling slightly down at me. I smiled shyly back in return and then started to walk again as I saw the lights had turned green for us to cross. Edward jogged two strides to catch up with me.

"So, Arizona." He murmured and I could hear laughter in his voice. "How did you guess about the jazz?"

I coughed over my surprised laugh and flashed a quick look up at his profile. He was smiling forward, looking down the street ahead of us.

"Um, I didn't… Well, not on purpose. I was teasing you." I mumbled. "It's actually my 'Burning Up' playlist. It reminds me of you." I explained.

I ducked my head down and I felt a hot blush flood my cheeks as I realized how much I had just revealed. I looked desperately for a huge hole in the ground that I could throw myself into as I felt his eyes burning into my profile.

"Phew." Edward chuckled after a long moment. "I thought I was being horribly clichéd."

"Eh, I didn't say it wasn't clichéd just that it was one of my playlists." I shrugged, trying to downplay my mortification with nonchalance.

"True." Edward laughed lightly.

We both paused at the door into my building.

"Goodnight, Arizona. See you tomorrow." Edward smiled down at me.

"Goodnight, Edward." I replied. "See you tomorrow." I added.

I turned into my building and thought I felt his eyes on me as I walked to the elevator but he was gone when I looked back towards the street. I rode the lift up to my floor and then let myself into my apartment. I set my pizza down on the coffee table and went to put my gym clothes with the rest of a load of laundry on and then changed into my pajamas. I docked my iPod into their portable speakers in my living room and selected my 'Burning Up' playlist before tucking my legs under me on the couch and reaching for my pizza. I slowly chewed as the smooth, dark jazz floated through the room, thinking about Edward.

My phone chirped in my purse and I slowly got up and retrieved it, opening up the waiting text message while I walked back to the sofa.

_**Listening 2 jazz.  
It reminds me  
of you. – E**_

I smiled widely down at my phone, wondering if maybe Edward could be even slightly interested in me like I was in him. I thought for a minute and then tapped out my reply before pressing send and returning to my pizza.

'_**Burning Up'  
playing now.  
sweet dreams ;)  
– B**_

I transferred my washing into the dryer when its cycle had finished and slowly got ready for bed. I kept my iPod playing and could hear it softly playing as I curled up under my quilt. I rolled onto my other side restlessly and then kicked my legs out straight. I shifted again, trying to get comfortable. I ended up lying on my back, staring up at the ceiling with my arms flung out. I was feeling fidgeting and tense rather than calm and languid like the jazz that was still floating through my bedroom door. I sighed and slipped my hand down the front of my pajamas, sliding one finger into my already slick folds and moving it in a circle around my clit. I gasped at how sensitive I already was and repeated the action a little more firmly. I relaxed more and followed my body's rhythms until I found my release, biting my lip to suppress the moan I couldn't help. I lay still, feeling heavy and languid and fully relaxed down into the mattress. I waited for my breathing to slow back down and languorously closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep soon after and woke the next morning, remembering only snippets of the sweet dreams I had of a relaxed, laughing Edward.


	9. Chapter 9

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

I lay gasping in the dark, cooling jizz splattered across my stomach and chest as I stared blindly up at the ceiling. I reached over and snagged the shirt I'd worn home from the gym off the floor beside my bed and wiped it roughly across my torso, cleaning off the evidence of my second imaginary tryst with Bella tonight. I'd already jerked off roughly and hurriedly in the shower at the gym after completing my entire workout semi-hard listening to her wicked playlist pounding through the speakers around me. I would have been fine if I hadn't seen what she'd named her playlist but knowing that she had selected the songs because they reminded her of sex had completely undone me. Each song had been similar with driving beats and raw, yearning vocals and I'd imagined Bella late at night, raw and yearning and had only wanted to be with her, in the dark and just as raw and needy.

I groaned but it was a different groan from the one that had involuntarily ripped from my chest only minutes ago. I was already in too deep with this girl, I was drawn to her like I'd never been drawn to another woman before but I felt desperately vulnerable and didn't know if I had the strength to stand beside her and wait, loving her, for her to leave me.

I sighed and reached over to my nightstand for my stereo's remote, stopping the cool, dark and languid jazz that had floated around my bedroom. I flopped back down onto my bed, throwing an arm across my eyes and started working through my relaxation exercises that I'd learnt to combat my insomniac tendencies. I was, surprisingly, soon drifting closer to sleep, images of Bella's smile and eyes printed on the back of my eyelids causing me to smile softly myself.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I grinned when my alarm woke me up harshly from my warm sleep, feeling victorious that I hadn't been woken early by what had become recurring sex dreams of Bella that shifted suddenly and horrifyingly into nightmares of Chelsea. I gritted my teeth and hissed when my satin sheets dragged across my slightly abused, morning wood but then I grinned wider, at least I'd woken up hard, my nightmares had had me waking up limp and panicked. I ruefully thought that I would have to start keeping tissues and hand lotion on my nightstand like a teenager if I kept interacting with Bella judging by the sensitivity I was feeling this morning. I tried to shake off my goofy mood as I got up to put coffee on and start getting ready for work but found myself still smiling as I walked into the office.

"Brother mine, what has put that smile on your face this morning?" Alice sang as I walked past her desk.

I jumped, startled, and then shrugged easily. "Nothing, it's just a lovely morning, little sister." I smiled.

"Edward, it's raining outside." She said doubtfully.

"Eh." I shrugged again. "Anyway, what's got you here before the sparrows are awake?" I asked, smiling as I repeated Bella's phrase from Saturday morning.

"This new project's killing me and I have to leave at twenty to six today to get to yoga on time." She replied, pouting slightly.

"I'll try and leave then and walk down with you." I said, nodding thoughtfully.

I shook my head and laughed at her knowing smirk.

"Whatever, Alice." I muttered as I walked away and heard her laugh behind me.

I shut myself into my office and started going through my schedule and work for the day so I could leave early with Alice. I kept my head down all day, ruthlessly shutting down any stray thoughts of Bella so I could focus on finishing all of my outstanding tasks. I was frowning down at bug report list from one of our projects when Alice knocked briefly before opening my door.

"Edward, will you be ready to leave in ten minutes?" She asked. "I really want to leave on time."

I glanced at the time on my laptop and saw with surprise that it was 5:30pm.

"Yeah, give me five minutes and I'll meet you at the lifts." I replied, holding up the report in explanation.

I hurriedly scrawled a couple of comments across the report and then set it down. I shut down my laptop and then scooped up my gym bag and squash kit before snatching the report back up and striding out of my office, swinging the door locked behind me.

I walked quickly over to the desk of the project's team leader and handed him the report when he looked up.

"Stefan, can you set up a meeting with your senior people and Ben and me to go over the full bug list on Thursday?" I asked.

"Sure, Edward. I'll send the meeting request through for a time when we're all free." He agreed.

"Great. See you tomorrow." I said and walked over to the lifts where I could see Alice, Jasper and Ben waiting.

"Wow, on time, Cullen. I'm impressed." Jasper drawled as I stopped by his side.

I shrugged but didn't say anything as the lift doors opened in front of us and I filed in after the others. We quickly made our way out of the building and started walking briskly towards Pump. Ben and I were discussing the report I'd just finished looking at and Alice was chattering away with Jasper, almost skipping by his side.

"BELLA! ANGELA!" Alice shouted and I almost stumbled with the shock of her loud cry.

I looked up and saw her jumping and waving across the street; I followed her focus and saw Bella and Angela on the other side of the street, walking a parallel course to ours. Alice danced across the street, nimbly passing through the gaps in the traffic. Ben laughed and then jogged after her to go to greet his wife. Jasper and I stopped to wait for them to make their way over to our side of the street, the side closest to the gym just down the block.

"You know, Alice says Bella can't lie." Jasper said softly, smiling over to where Alice had just tackled the two women in a group hug.

"Huh?" I said stupidly, smiling myself at the sight of Bella laughing with Alice and Angela.

"Alice says that Bella is incapable of lying. She says that Bella might try and dodge a question but if she answers it will always be the truth." He explained, still watching the scene across the street as Ben joined the girls.

"How does she know that?" I asked slowly.

I thought back over the times when Bella had seemed embarrassed by her answers and wondered if it was actually true. I remembered her obvious embarrassment when I'd asked her how she guessed that I played jazz as my own sexy mood music and she'd admitted that it was one of her playlists that reminded her of me. Jasper's soft laugh broke into my recollections.

"Alice asked her straight out why she got so embarrassed sometimes." He said fondly. "Bella said that she was such a bad liar that she had to tell the truth because everyone knew when she wasn't anyway and it just made it worse. Alice told me that Bella said she wished that she could lie so she wouldn't be such an open book to everyone around her."

"I personally think it's also because, like Alice, she doesn't have much of a filter and just blurts things out." He continued.

I looked at him thoughtfully. "Yeah, maybe…" I said.

We were interrupted by the girls and Ben joining us, Alice towing Bella along by her hand and Ben following with his arm around Angela. Alice dropped Bella's hand as they reached our side and then started moving with Jasper, turning so that she was walking backwards so she could keep talking to Bella. I stepped to Bella's side and easily kept pace beside her, shortening my stride to match hers. She smiled up at me and mouthed 'Hey' to me and then turned her attention back to Alice in front of her, laughing at something Alice was saying. I didn't hear a word that was being said, lost in the sound of Bella's laugh and easy replies. I shook off my fascination when I noticed that Bella and Alice had fallen quiet and were both watching me expectantly.

"Sorry? I missed that." I mumbled.

"I asked if you were playing Rosalie tonight, Edward. I said Bella should stay to watch after yoga if you were because it would be a good match." Alice said quickly, not taking a breath.

"Uh yeah, I'm playing Rosalie tonight. We're on at 7:30 after Jasper's match against Peter." I supplied.

Alice smirked at me and then twirled around to face forwards and walk normally again, turning her face up to talk with Jasper.

"I think my sister is developing a girl crush on you, Arizona." I muttered softly to the beautiful girl walking beside me.

"The feelings mutual." She laughed lightly. "She is always so perfectly put together and her energy seems boundless."

We walked in easy silence and turned into the gym together. I laughed as I saw her eyes flash to the postered wall across from the front desk and she grinned up at me in response. Jasper, Ben and I waited behind the girls as they stopped at the front desk, paying for their class and collecting locker keys. As they stepped away Bella waved goodbye to me and then walked into the change rooms with Alice and Angela. I looked over at Ben in surprise; I hadn't noticed Angela carrying her own yoga mat until just as I saw her follow Alice through the door.

"Angela is taking up yoga?" I asked as we stepped up to the desk to get our own locker keys.

"Yeah." He laughed. "Bella is a very bad influence, she gets Angela into all sorts of mischief."

"Hey, it's not too bad." Jasper chuckled. "Alice was showing me some of the poses they had her doing and it was very… uh, interesting."

I gritted my teeth. "Jasper, that is my sister you're talking shit about." I glared at him.

"Hey, man, I was just saying—" He laughed, holding up both hands.

"Don't!" I bit out, cutting him off.

I was still sometimes uncomfortable with Alice and Jasper seeing each other, even after four years. Jasper was my best friend and a great guy but I had listened to all of his stories about his conquests in college and early twenties and I didn't want him to treat my sister like any of those women. Ben and Jasper walked into the men's change room in front of me, laughing at my overreaction. I shook off my irritation and pushed through the door after them. I changed quickly into my squash gear, pulling on a warm up jacket, and grabbed up my racquet bag before following Jasper and Ben out into the lobby to wait for the girls.

Bella pushed out through the door first, opening the door with her hip as she walked backwards laughing and talking with Alice and Angela. I drank in the sight of her briefly, in the tiny dark blue shorts and tank top that had been starring in my dreams, before I turned my eyes away from her so she didn't catch me drooling at her like an adolescent boy.

"Nice knees, Bella." Jasper laughed beside me and I flashed a startled look back at Bella.

She had large squares of sticky plaster just under both her knees like oversized band-aids. I raised my eyebrows at her questioningly when she looked over at us briefly before looking determinedly away.

"Carpet burn."She muttered shortly.

I stared at her in horror, wanting to demand what had happened, and who with, and when, and… I turned away sharply.

"What?" Jasper laughed loudly in surprise.

"Ask Ben." She muttered even more abruptly.

"Sorry, ask who?" Ben laughed beside me.

I turned back towards her, not understanding Ben's teasing laughter and wanting to know what had happened. I saw Angela laughing and then saw Bella roll her eyes dramatically and heave an exasperated sigh.

"Ask Ben, the Reigning King and Conquering Legend of GuitarHero and all things Cool." She huffed and turned to stalk past us.

Her kittenish rage was spoilt by trying to storm past us wearing flip flops and the way her eyes gave away the laughter she was trying to hide. I jogged forward to catch up with her and walked lightly beside her through the double doors at the end of the lobby towards the lift. I felt her hesitate when she saw the small group of squash players already queued up waiting for the elevators and caught the glance she cast up at me. I remembered the intense moment we had shared in the crowded lift last Thursday, which was now the recurring location of my nocturnal fantasies, and smothered my smirk as she quickly pushed into the stairwell, avoiding the lift.

I followed her up the stairs, concentrating on not watching her cute little ass and swaying hips in front of me.

"Phoenix, don't be embarrassed because you got beaten by me." Ben called up the stairs from behind us.

"Whatever, Ben. You know you were in training for weeks before Saturday." Bella called back over her shoulder.

I coughed over my laugh and heard Jasper snicker behind me.

"Yeah but I beat you by so much, Bella, that it doesn't matter." Ben called and we all laughed when he didn't dispute her claim.

"See you after, Edward." She smiled at me, holding the door out of the stairwell for me and then leaving me to hold it for the others.

"Later, Arizona." I called after her as I watched her walk into the yoga studio.

I smiled at Alice and Angela as they brushed past and followed Bella into the room and then walked slowly over to sit with Jasper in front of the court we'd be playing on that night. I nodded over at Peter, Charlotte and Rosalie as they stood in a huddle near the door into the court. I started to focus on the games in front of us, trying to work out who'd be victorious tonight. I thought that Charlotte might just beat Ben and that Jasper could beat Peter but it'd be a good game. I was confident I could beat Rosalie but knew that I'd have to be in top form to stay in front of her because she knew my game so well.

I was surprised when Ben beat Charlotte in a tie break in the third set and congratulated him warmly when he flopped down on the bench beside me as Jasper took the court in front of us. I watched closely as Peter and Jasper dueled it out, closely matched and familiar with each other's style of play and then stood and cheered with Ben when Jasper won. I slapped Jasper on the back as I passed him on my way onto the court and then waited for Rosalie to enter behind me so we could begin to warm up together.

I glanced over to the benches outside the glass back wall of the court before we started and saw that the girls had joined Ben, Jasper and Emmett after their yoga class. I looked away quickly, not wanting to be distracted by the sweaty, disheveled and glowing Bella who was now watching Rosalie and me as we took our places for Rosalie's first serve.

Our first set flew by with Rosalie anticipating and counteracting some of my favorite strategic plays. She moved like lightening around the court and I was hard pressed to reach some of her well placed shots and keep them in play. I won the first set narrowly and smirked over cheekily at her as she glared at me after the last rally of the set. I bit back my laughter when she called a bathroom break and stormed off the court.

I swung my racquet idly around in my hands as I waited for Rosalie to return and casually glanced over to where I'd last seen Bella before the start of the game. I frowned as I noticed that she looked cold, huddled under her towel on her shoulders and with her knees drawn up to her chest. I saw that Alice and Angela were wearing Jasper's and Ben's respective warm up jackets and had their towels draped over their legs. Without thinking more, I jogged over to the door off the court and then rapidly moved over to the bench with my gear and grabbed up my own warm up jacket. I walked quickly over behind Bella and plucked her towel off her shoulders, draping my jacket over her shoulders before placing her towel back over one shoulder.

"Thanks." She mumbled and shot a grateful smile up to me.

I shrugged lightly and then jogged back over to meet Rosalie at the door back onto the court. I stepped quickly into place ready to serve to start our second set before I made the mistake of looking over at Bella. She had pushed her arms through the sleeves of my jacket and was holding up the lapel to her face, almost like she was smelling my jacket. She hurriedly turned her eyes away from mine when I looked over and looked like she was blushing and my mind went completely blank while I tried to process what it meant if she was trying to catch my scent on my clothes.

I distractedly served and it was a weak, poorly placed shot that Rosalie pounced upon, whipping it back at me so quickly that I barely managed to return her shot before she'd skillfully set me up for an impossible return that I didn't even try to make. I could feel her glare as she stalked back to serve for the next point and I avoided her eyes as I stepped forward to crouch ready to return her serve. Her serve caught me in the middle of my back in a burst of flashing, crunching pain.

"Ow! Fuck, Rosalie." I gasped as I straightened, arching and grabbing my back where the ball had hit.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Edward." She called with mock sincerity as she jogged forward.

She placed her hand on my back where I was now hunched over, trying to breathe through the pain, and bent forward with me.

"If you throw this game because you're distracted by your little pretty I will hurt you, Edward." She muttered into my ear.

"She's not _my_ little pretty, Rosalie." I gasped back, grimacing.

"I will throw the game myself by aiming every single serve directly at that same spot, Edward." She threatened, ignoring my protest, and patted me right where her serve had hit.

I straightened again slowly and then waved my hand at the referee, not prepared to concede the Let and take a point off Rosalie for what was a fair call on her part. It was a nasty way to make her point but it was still fair for her to call out my inattention and stupid play. I winced as I crouched down in my former position, ready to replay the serve.

"Ready, Edward?" Rosalie called sweetly from her spot behind me.

I glanced nervously over my shoulder at her and nodded slightly. I could hear Emmett's booming laugh from outside the court but didn't dare glance over to where he and Bella were sitting. I breathed in deeply and cleared my mind ready to finish out the game and shifted my weight on the balls of my feet, getting set to return serve.

I won the second set in a tie break, closing out the game and ending what was a much closer battle than the scores reflected. I shook Rosalie's hand and congratulated her genuinely on a well fought battle. She smiled glitteringly back at me and nodded once in acknowledgment. I walked off the court slowly behind her, watching as she skipped lightly over to Emmett and threw her arms around his neck. The others were all standing, waiting for me to join them before heading downstairs to get changed, and I flapped my hand at them to silently tell them to go on ahead without me.

I stepped over to my gear and unzipped my racquet bag to return my racquet and safety goggles before following the others.

"Thanks for lending me your jacket, Edward." Bella said softly beside me.

I looked over in surprise and saw that she was holding my folded jacket out for me to take back. I shook my head and smiled over at her.

"Keep it until you get changed, Arizona." I said easily, happy she had stayed so I got to spend more time with her alone.

"Thanks." She said lightly and quickly shrugged back into it.

I zipped up my bag and slung it onto my shoulder and we started to walk back towards the elevator and stairwell together.

"So, Arizona, are you going to brave the lift with me tonight?" I asked lazily, smiling straight ahead of us as we drew closer to the elevator and the stairs.

I heard her chuckle beside me and felt my own smile widen. "Yeah, I'll risk it." She murmured.

I pressed the call button for the lift and stepped back to her side and glanced down at her. She was breathtaking, she'd taken her hair down and it fell in soft waves down her back and I wanted to reach out to feel if it was as soft and silky as it looked. My jacket swamped her, falling to the middle of her thighs and covering up her tiny yoga outfit, and I couldn't decide if that was a good thing or not.

"That was a good game tonight." She said and glanced up at me with a small smile. "Rosalie is a very good player."

"She is." I admitted truthfully. "She can consistently beat everyone in the tournament except me and Jasper." I added without conceit.

Bella didn't say anything and so I continued. "She can also beat either of us on a good night but sometimes she lets her… um… irritation get the better of her." I said lightly.

"That shot looked like it would have hurt." Bella said quietly.

I laughed weakly. "Yeah, it did." I admitted.

The elevator dinged in front of us and I gestured Bella forward in front of me. We both turned to face the doors and stood with two feet of space between us. I saw Bella smiling out of the corner of my eye and turned my head to look down at her. She looked up at me and bit her lip against her smile and I smile lazily down at her, wondering if she was remembering our last ride together in this elevator. I saw her eyes widen a fraction and felt myself react to the sudden electricity between us. I thought I heard her breath hitch and turned my body to face hers and started to take a step closer but elevator dinged and I looked up sharply as the doors opened on the ground floor in front of us.

"I'm not riding in there with you again, Edward." She muttered as she stepped quickly past me but I saw she was smiling.

I laughed as I followed her out of the lift, jogging again to catch up with her rapid stride.

"Bella, Edward, do you want a juice tonight?" Emmett called as we walked past the juice bar towards the change rooms.

I nodded and kept walking but Bella stopped at the bar to talk with Emmett. I hesitated briefly and then continued on to get showered and changed, only hearing the quiet murmur of their conversation behind me as I pushed into the change room.

I stood under the hot spray of the shower for a long while trying to ease the knot in my back where Rosalie had fired her serve into me. I finally shut off the water and toweled off before striding naked over to my locker with my towel around my neck. I found my tub of Arnica gel in my gym bag and tried smearing some on the sore spot in the middle of my back. I then quickly pulled on my jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt and sat to pull on my socks and slip into my shoes. I stuffed my sweaty clothes, wet towel and toiletries into my gym bag and then grabbed up my bags, glancing around before I left to make sure I hadn't missed anything. I walked over to the door and pushed out into the lobby, smiling as I made my way over to the empty stool between Alice and Bella. Ben and Angela had already left and only Jasper, Alice, Bella and Rosalie were at the bar with Emmett still playing bartender behind the counter. I saw my juice in front of my seat and an empty banana skin in front of Bella, I looked at her curiously and saw she was eating a mostly finished apple and holding my folded up jacket in her lap with one hand while she listened to Rosalie sitting on her other side.

I dropped my bags onto the floor behind my stool and eased onto the seat, still feeling the ache below my shoulders blades from Rosalie's deliberately wayward serve. I grabbed my drink and took a thirsty sip and then raised my eyebrow questioningly at Emmett. It tasted deliciously like passionfruit and pineapple and something else that I couldn't place.

"It's an Emmett Surprise." Emmett explained.

"What's the surprise?" I asked suspiciously and heard Bella laugh beside me.

Emmett waggled his eyebrows at me and then grew serious. "It's a secret otherwise it's not a surprise." He explained as if I was slow.

I decided to ignore him, not wanting to play into one of his traps.

"So, Bella, are you going to take up squash?" Jasper called down past Alice and me.

"Um… NO, Jasper." She laughed. "I'm not good at ball sports." She explained in response to his quirked eyebrow.

She looked over at Emmett now standing in front of her with an expectant, gleeful expression on his face and snorted.

"Sorry, Emmett, I'll correct that." She said, rolling her eyes. "I'm not good at _most_ ball sports." She said and then laughed.

I coughed over my own startled laugh, avoiding both her and Emmett's laughing eyes as they both looked sharply over at me.

"On that note, Emmett, I'm going to make an undignified exit." Bella said and placed my jacket on my knee before slipping off her stool to stand behind it.

I stood also, quickly picking my bags off the floor after stuffing my jacket into my gym bag, and then slung their straps over my shoulder before I grabbed my drink off the counter. Bella was looking at me in surprise and I shrugged easily back, mimicking her own raised eyebrows and sipping through my straw so I didn't have to make up an excuse to leave with her. I followed behind her, saying goodbye to each person in turn and ignoring their amused, knowing looks at me. I held out my hand to Bella, silently asking for her banana peel and apple core before we left the juice bar, and then reached over the counter and threw them into one of the containers that Emmett kept there for scraps.

I walked beside Bella to the front desk where we both handed our locker keys to Jessica and then walked with her out onto the street. I felt her looking at me as we started to walk back towards our apartments and smiled lightly at her.

"You didn't have to leave when I did, Edward." She said concernedly.

"Eh, I wanted to." I explained, dismissing her concern.

"Oh, okay." She said and then fell silent.

We walked to the end of the block without speaking again, with me darting quickly between a garbage bin on the way and her side to throw away my empty drink cup, and paused to wait for the lights to be able to cross.

"Gym tomorrow night, Arizona?" I asked, glancing down at her.

"Um yeah. I'll be late though." She said. "I have to drive out in the afternoon to meet with an author and then I have to return the pool car I'm taking." She explained.

We both started to cross the street together when the lights turned green.

"Where are you heading?" I asked curiously.

"Maple Valley." She answered. "Angela said it might take about an hour."

I thought for a moment. "An hour is a good estimate." I agreed. "It could take longer depending on bad weather or traffic."

She nodded thoughtfully and we kept walking in companionable silence. I was thinking over Jasper's comments about Bella's inability to lie and trying to decide if I should test his theory with a question I was burningly curious about. We both slowed and stopped at the same time in front of Bella's building.

"Hey, Arizona, I'm curious about something." I said, turning to face her after having decided to ask my question.

"Okay…" She said slowly.

I smiled over her head at her wary tone and knew then that I would hear the truth from her.

"Do you have any more playlists that you use to um… set the mood?" I asked teasingly.

I smiled as she looked down at her feet and shifted her weight slightly from one foot to another.

"One more." She said softly and then didn't elaborate, still staring at her feet.

I groaned lightly and she flashed her eyes up to meet mine.

"And…?" I asked, my voice sounded husky to my own ears.

She shrugged and then dropped her eyes again but not before I saw her tiny smile.

"It's called 'Makin Whoopee'." She added, more softly still.

I waited for her to continue and then chuckled.

"Okay, I'll guess… um…" I said as I thought furiously. "Light, airy classical music." I hazarded.

She shook her head and smiled up at me, her eyes dancing now. She looked like she thought I wouldn't be able to guess.

"Hmm… big band standards from the thirties and forties?" I tried.

"Nope." She said, smiling wider and I could tell she was enjoying me being so far off base with my guesses.

"Please don't say it's sappy love ballads, Arizona." I groaned laughingly.

"Nope." She repeated, laughing with me now.

"Okay, I give up. Please tell me?" I asked pleadingly.

She shifted her gaze to stare down the street away from me and I recognised the trait from at breakfast on Saturday morning.

"Reggae." She shrugged.

"Reggae?" I parroted, surprised.

She shrugged again and then returned her eyes to mine. "It makes me happy." She said simply.

"Oh…" I said thoughtfully. "Bob Marley's 'Is this Love'?" I asked, wanting to know what style of reggae she liked.

She nodded, still holding my gaze. "That's a good one." She agreed.

I smiled down lazily at her, amazed at how she always surprised me and made me look at things differently.

"I really need to spend some quality time with your iPod, Arizona." I joked.

She laughed up at me. "Alone?" She was teasing now, turning the tables around on me once again.

I huffed a laugh and stepped towards her, cupping her face with my two hands. "No, not alone." I said and my voice sounded an octave deeper than usual.

I watched as she swallowed and almost groaned when I felt her shift closer to me. I brushed my thumb along her bottom lip to free it from her teeth and felt her breath expel quickly and I drew in my own ragged breath when her breasts brushed against my t-shirt as she sucked in a large replacement breath. I stared at her mouth and slowly dipped my head down towards hers, flicking my eyes up to meet hers to make sure she was okay with what I was doing and feeling my chest tighten as I got lost in her shining eyes. I dragged my eyes away and then shut them involuntarily as I lightly brushed my lips against hers and then brushed them back again.

I pressed my lips more firmly against hers when I felt her hands slide into the hair behind my head. I moved my lips gently against hers, coaxing hers to dance with my own, and then teased my tongue along the seam of her lips. I moaned silently when I felt her hum happily against my mouth and then dart her tongue out to meet mine.

I dropped one hand from her cheek to wrap my arm around her waist and gently snug her against my body. I almost went cross-eyed behind my eyelids when she eagerly pressed her body tighter against mine and I felt her breasts push against my chest and her hips bump against me. I broke away to drag my lips to kiss the spot on her neck just below and behind her ear, drawing in deep breaths before I returned to plunder her mouth again.

"Edward." She breathed into my mouth dreamily and I felt my heart swell and start to splinter.

I felt her name, Bella, start to rise in my throat but then felt my chest freeze against uttering that one word.

I tried to draw in a breath against the tightening in my chest, with my mouth still against hers, and found I couldn't and panicked. I ripped my mouth away from hers and pressed my forehead against hers and gasped desperately for breath. I could breathe in but I couldn't breathe out and I desperately fought the panic rising in my body.

"Fuck, I can't do this." I gasped. "I can't do this with you." And I could hear the despair in my own voice.

I thrust back from her, steadying her with my one hand on her waist. I looked into her eyes and then tore mine away, avoiding the bewilderment I saw in hers.

"I'm sorry, so sorry." I muttered.

I turned abruptly and walked quickly away, almost running as I turned into my building and didn't dare to look back to see if she was still there. I ran up the stairs rather than wait for the elevator, arriving on the seventh floor out of breath and trembling in reaction to my sudden panic and wild rush away from Bella. I stumbled to my apartment, fumbling with my keys to open the locks, and then almost fell through the door when I finally managed to open it. I dropped my bags as I swung the door shut behind me and then staggered into the kitchen without turning on any lights.

I ran the kitchen tap, filled a glass from the draining board and then lifted it to my lips, closing my eyes so I wouldn't see the violent trembling of my hand. I emptied the glass thirstily and then filled it again, drinking it down in another long swallow. I shakily placed the glass back on the counter and then stood in front of the window; leaning forward with both hands on the counter and trying to calm my breathing.

After a long time, I didn't know how long, I pushed off the counter and walked slowly into the living room. I looked around the dark room blankly, not knowing what to do with myself, before I slowly moved over to the couch and sat down abruptly. I snagged the remote off the coffee table and turned on the T.V., flicking through channels until I found a football game. I sank back into the seat and watched the screen in front of me numbly, not taking anything in. I felt the night settle around me and the cold sink into my bones as I stared at the flickering colors in front of me, not noticing when the game ended and a replay of another game took its place. I briefly shook off my funk when a panel of experts started blathering on about nothing at the end of the second game and flicked through more channels until I found another game. I watched with now bleary eyes, not knowing or caring who was playing or what the outcome was as I dumbly sat through the early hours.

I repeated my searching for random football games when I was forced to by annoying interruptions until I heard my harsh alarm beeping in my bedroom. I then slowly and painfully dragged myself off the sofa and walked woodenly into the kitchen to put coffee on. I stood blankly there for a long minute before turning towards my bedroom and ensuite to start getting ready for the day.


	10. Chapter 10

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

I walked to work still in my dazed state, wearing my sunglasses to protect my red, scratchy eyes from the mocking, bright morning sunlight. I turned into our office building on automatic pilot and stabbed the elevator call button and waited mutely for the doors to open in front of me. I stared blanking forwards in the lift, still unable to breathe past a shallow pant since last night. I walked directly towards my office, watching the ground three feet in front of me as I moved and still wearing my sunglasses. I raised my head and turned my face towards Alice's cheerful greeting but kept walking woodenly towards the sanctuary of my office. I flicked the lights on after I unlocked my door and then sank gracelessly into my chair and powered up my laptop, still open from my eager departure the previous evening.

I stared blankly at the screen in front of me for five long minutes, not knowing what I needed to do to start working. I propped my elbows on my desk in front of me and sank my head into my hands, wondering what I had to do to be able to start functioning again.

I heard a quick, light knock on my door and looked up and waited silently. Alice eased my door open and peered through anxiously. She quickly stepped through and then closed and locked the door softly behind her before walking lightly over to stand next to me. She set the steaming mug she was holding down next to me.

"Edward, are you ok?" She asked quietly.

I tried nodding reassuringly but it came off as jerky and jittery. She reached over and carefully removed my sunglasses.

"Drink this tea." She ordered, nudging the mug towards me. "It's St John's Wort and Lemon Balm." She expanded.

I took a cautious sip and grimaced and heard her chuckle softly beside me.

"I know it doesn't taste great." She said and then paused. "Edward, are you hyperventilating?" She asked, almost whispering.

"I don't know, maybe…" I whispered back, feeling my chest tighten more.

She stepped behind me and leaned forward, pressing one cool palm against the back of my neck and her other small palm around in front of my chest, over my diaphragm. She pressed the side of her face against mine and quietly murmured soothing, nonsensical words as she gently rocked us together until we both felt my breathing start to slow and deepen. She carefully straightened and removed her hands but then placed one palm on my back and smoothed it around in calming circles.

"Finish your tea, Edward." She gently commanded, pushing it back towards me.

I gingerly lifted the mug back to my mouth and took another small sip, followed by another as I started to get used to the slightly bitter brew.

"Can I look at your schedule for this morning?" She asked and gestured at my laptop.

I nodded and stood, now cradling my mug in both hands, to let her in to sit in front of my desk. I watched as she opened my calendar application and then scrolled through my appointments for the day.

"Okay, this will be easy." She muttered to herself.

She started working through my meetings from the start of the day, postponing some and changing the invited attendees on others. I drank my tea as I watched her and finally, after ten minutes, she smiled up at me and I shook my head wonderingly back at her.

"I've freed up your day until three when you have to attend that video conference with the Clients from Hell." She said.

She stood up and took my empty mug away from me and then herded me over to the long couch in the corner of my office.

"Lie down, Edward." She ordered.

I sunk down onto the couch, knowing not to argue with her expression. She sighed in exasperation and crossed her arms in front of her.

"Shoes, tie, jacket. Off!" She demanded.

I smiled weakly and shrugged out of my jacket while toeing off my shoes and then reached up to pull off my tie and undo the top two buttons at my neck and the buttons at each cuff. She nodded approvingly and then walked quickly over to the door and switched off the lights before returning to the couch in front of me.

"Lie down." She repeated.

I huffed a soft laugh and stretched out onto the couch, taking up the full length. Alice tucked a cushion under my head and then sank gracefully down to sit on the floor near my head. She leaned back against the couch and sighed softly.

"Can you remember the time that Emmett dared me to ride the toboggan down our driveway in the summertime?" She asked softly.

"Yeah." I murmured back.

"And I fell off and cried so much that I couldn't breathe." She said even softer.

"Yeah, and mom rocked you until you calmed down and could tell her that you weren't hurt but were upset because you had ripped your favorite jeans." I murmured, continuing the story.

"And she sewed patches over the rips that were rainbows and hot air balloons and stars and every girl wanted a pair just like mine the next time I wore them." She finished happily, almost whispering.

"Can you remember the time I told Emmett that Santa Claus didn't exist?" I asked softly.

"No." She huffed, already trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, I was five and Emmett was seven and so you must have been three and a half." I murmured. "Emmett cried so hard that he couldn't breathe and mom rocked him until he calmed down and then told him only little boys who believed in Santa got presents."

"Oh no." Alice said, still trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, I didn't get any presents from Santa that year, only ones from Grandma and Grandpa Cullen." I smiled up at the ceiling.

"Oh no, handkerchiefs, underwear and socks, right?" She snickered.

"Yeah." I sighed.

Alice and I swapped memories from our childhood until I fell asleep. I woke up naturally, feeling more refreshed and halfway human again.

I padded over to my laptop in my socks and rubbed my finger over the scroll pad to dismiss the screensaver so I could see what time it was. I blinked in surprise when I saw it was two o'clock and then guesstimated that I'd gotten about six hours of sleep. I looked up when I heard another quick, light knock on the door and then padded over to unlock and open it, letting Alice in who was carrying another steaming mug and a large paper bag in her hands.

"More tea and lunch, brother dearest." She smiled up at me as she walked in. "You look better." She added.

"I feel better, thank you, Alice. You are my very bestest, most favoritest sister in all the world."I said lightly.

Alice sat on my desk talking about yoga as I tore through the four sandwiches she had bought me and drank down the second mug of her bitter tea. She skipped out and then brought me a large glass of water before I'd finished and I gratefully drank it down at the end of my lunch. She looked at her wristwatch and then stood up abruptly.

"Two thirty, Edward. You'd better go and make yourself presentable for your three o'clock video link." She told me. "I'll pop in later." She promised.

I watched her walk gracefully away and I was suddenly overwhelmingly grateful for all of her attention and care, knowing I had needed her unusually calming presence as well as the distraction she had provided.

"Thanks, Alice. For today, I mean." I called after her.

She popped her head back into my office and grinned cheekily at me.

"You can let me take next Thursday afternoon off to thank me properly, Edward." She said lightly.

"Anything, Alice." I agreed and laughed as she grinned wider and then spun away.

The rest of the afternoon flew past with even the video conference with our Clients from Hell going surprisingly well, maybe because all of their main troublemakers were not attending. At five thirty I had just started working through the emails piled up in my inbox when Alice again rapped on my, now open, office door. I looked up questioningly and waited for her to speak.

"Grab your gym bag, brother dearest. You are walking down to Pump with me and Jasper." She told me.

"I am?" I asked stupidly. "Why are you going? It's Wednesday, there's no yoga tonight."

"I know that." She said, rolling her eyes. "Rosalie wants to show me the new treadmills that arrived today. She says their running surface is much better and that they won't hurt my shins like their current ones." She explained.

"Oh, ok." I frowned at the unread emails in front of me.

"Edward, everything will still be here waiting in the morning." She promised me.

"Yeah." I agreed. "Give me five minutes, Alice, and I'll meet you at the lifts." I added.

She nodded and then disappeared from my doorframe. I closed down all of my applications and then powered down my laptop, not bothering to pack it up to take home with me tonight. I sat at my desk quietly for a long minute, not wanting to see Bella at the gym but also knowing that there was every chance that I wouldn't because I was going there early and she'd probably be late. I frowned worriedly and then abruptly decided that I'd rather just get it over with than have to actually explain why I didn't want to go to Alice. I pushed up from my seat and walked out of my office, picking up my gym bag as I passed it. I turned to lock my door behind me and then walked briskly to the lifts, wearing my game face so that outwardly I appeared normal.

Once we got out onto the street I asked Jasper if he'd had any more thoughts on his Whistler ski trip, partly to direct our conversation along a safe, comfortable path and partly because I was genuinely interested and wanted to distract myself from the feelings of dread I had about going to the gym. Alice, Jasper and I were soon deeply involved in the logistics of the ski trip and almost walked straight past the entrance to the gym. Laughing together, we turned in and stopped to grabbed locker keys before pushing into our different change rooms.

Jasper and I were changed and back out in the lobby quickly but were still beaten out by Alice who we could see, through the windows into the exercise room, walking on a treadmill with Emmett and Rosalie watching her. We quickly made our way into the three of them and listened to Rosalie's sales pitch on the new machines.

I started to think about how Bella would like the new treadmills and quickly felt uneasy and edgy again. I jumped, startled, when Emmett clapped me on the shoulder.

"So, little brother, what are we doing tonight?" He asked.

He eyed my basketball shorts and wifebeater, seeing that they were different to my usual workout clothes. I looked back at him steadily and made up my mind.

"I want you to make me puke, Emmett." I said seriously.

He looked at me and then nodded sharply. "Boxing, heavy bag, speed bag, skipping and burpies." He grinned at me evilly.

I nodded in turn and followed him into the corner of the weight room where the bags were set up. He grinned at me again.

"I'm going to make you hurl like your first day training for varsity football, Edward." He promised.

I nodded silently again, trusting that he knew my limits and what I needed tonight.

"Okay, first we warm up." He said and dropped with me to the floor to begin our stretching.

He worked us hard for an hour and I came close to puking twice but both times I was able to grit my teeth and breathe through it. About three quarters of the way through our session I noticed that Rosalie had rolled over a swiss exercise ball and was sitting on it with perfect posture, watching us work out.

At the end of the hour I stood in front of Emmett gasping deeply for breath, with every muscle trembling and every article of clothing on me soaked and dripping with sweat. I clasped my hands behind my head and breathed in deeply, luxuriating in the feeling of getting oxygen down deep into my burning lungs.

"Feeling better, Edward?" He asked.

I laughed weakly and nodded. "Yep." I panted.

"Want to talk about it?" He asked.

I thought about it for a minute, still with my hands behind my head and with sweat dripping off my clothes and body onto the floor. I leant forward with my knees slightly bent and rested my palms on my knees, staring at the floor between us. I glanced up at him and then looked back at the floor.

"I kissed Bella last night." I said softly.

He waited for me to speak again.

"I kissed Bella and had a full blown panic attack and then ran away from her." I mumbled miserably.

He waited for me to speak again.

"I kissed Bella and had a panic attack and couldn't sleep all night and turned up at the office still basically hyperventilating." I whispered.

He waited for me to speak again.

"I kissed Bella and ran away and now I don't want to see her again because I'm ashamed." I was barely whispering now.

"Why did you panic?" He asked softly and when I looked up at him I thought I could see that he already knew the answer.

"I tried to say her name, her real name and not fucking Arizona, and I froze and then realized I couldn't breathe." I said, avoiding the real reason that I deliberately hadn't thought about last night or today.

"Why couldn't you say her name?" Emmett asked, chasing me with the same question asked in a different way.

I felt a band of tightness creep around my chest and abruptly straightened and put my hands back behind my head so I could breathe in to the bottom of my lungs. I looked over at Emmett despairingly, not sure if I could voice my answer.

He waited for me to answer.

"Because if I call her Bella to her face…" I stopped, feeling incapable of putting words around how I felt.

He waited for me to answer.

"Because if I call her Bella I'm accepting and acknowledging everything I feel about her and I can't do that." I mumbled in a rush.

"Why can't you do that?" He asked.

"Fuck, Emmett, you sound like a cheap, third-rate therapist now." I sniped, anxious to deflect his questions.

He waited for me to answer.

I looked up at the ceiling, still with my hands behind my head to help me breathe. I turned a slow circle, shuffling my feet around and keeping my eyes trained upwards.

He waited for me to answer.

"Because I'll get hurt." I finally muttered.

"I can't promise you won't get hurt." He finally said.

I looked over at him and dropped my hands down. I stared at him for a moment longer and then shrugged my shoulders.

"I can't promise you won't get hurt but even if you do it can't be that bad, you'll recover." He continued.

I blew out a noisy breath and tipped my head back. "Fuck it." I muttered up at the ceiling.

"Hey." He said and his voice was sharper now. "Even with Chelsea you recovered. It didn't kill you."

I looked at him for a second then dropped my eyes away and felt my shoulders slump and tears that I hadn't cried in ten years prick my eyes.

"It almost did… on one mad night." I admitted brokenly.

"Fuck, Edward." He groaned.

I looked up at him and saw a slice of my fear and pain mirrored in his eyes. He took a swift step towards me to close the gap between us and caught me in a rough hug

"Why didn't you tell one of us?" He demanded gruffly into my ear.

I held myself frozen for a long second and then was suddenly clutching him fiercely, wanting to steal some of his strength.

"I couldn't." I whispered around a silent sob.

I stiffened when I felt Rosalie step behind me and wrap her arms around both me and Emmett but then relaxed again. I felt her cheek press against the side of my head an inch from Emmett's face.

"Edward, she will love you and hold you and never let you go." She murmured close behind my ear.

We stood there frozen in time and I felt supported and held up and wrapped in their strength. I knew they could feel the silent sobs that racked my chest and I didn't care as I felt burning tears swim behind my clamped shut eyelids. I felt Emmett lift his head beside me and stiffened again as I remembered that we were standing in the empty weight room directly in line with one of the arches that led through to the not so empty exercise room. I felt Emmett's grip tighten minutely around me.

"Yum, an Edward sandwich." I heard Bella's soft voice call from behind me and Rosalie.

I stiffened more and shifted my weight fractionally and felt Emmett's grip tighten even more, holding me still.

"You could make money on Pay-Per-View with this, you know? Except for the whole brother thing that is making me a bit uneasy." I heard her continue lightly and thought her normally rich voice sounded brittle.

I stayed frozen as Rosalie released us and then stepped away from me. I heard her tinkling laugh and then flinched as she sharply smacked my ass.

"I know, right Bella? Sorry, I just can't resist the Cullen men when they're hot and sweaty." She purred.

I felt Emmett's laugh in his chest even as I cringed as it sounded so close to my ear.

"We try and humor her, Bella. I can't have my Rose pouting or she'll get wrinkles." He laughed.

"Whatever, Emmett." Rosalie growled and she sounded further away.

"C'mon, Bella. I've been dying to show you the new treadmills that got delivered today." Rosalie said, her voice retreating further still.

"What am I going to do, Emmett?" I whispered despairingly.

"We're going to go and get changed and then you're coming home with me to watch the Huskies game on my sixty inch flat screen." He told me.

He stepped back then and moved around me so that he could turn me towards the exit and still keep me blocked from the view of the other room.

"Emmett, I watched football all night last night." I laughed weakly.

"Yeah, but was it the Huskies?" He asked seriously.

"I couldn't tell you." I admitted.

"Well then it mustn't have been the Huskies." He said matter of factually.

I tried to laugh again at his logic but it came out sounding cracked and wrong.

"Emmett, I don't have my car to get back home again." I said quietly.

"Eh." He dismissed my argument. "You can sleep in the guest room and I'll drop you off at your place when I open up the gym in the morning. I'll give Rose the morning off and tell her she needs more beauty sleep." He said lightly.

I did actually laugh at that, knowing that he wouldn't dare tell Rosalie any such thing. We walked quickly out into the lobby and over towards the change rooms. Emmett pushed me forwards slightly and then stopped behind me.

"I'm just going to go and tell Rose our plans." He explained when I looked back over my shoulder at him.

I nodded tiredly and tried to smile over at him as I pushed into the door of the men's change room. I walked over to my locker, already peeling off my soaking wet wifebeater with a grimace. I toed off my sneakers and peeled off my sweat socks and then dropped my shorts and boxer briefs in a wet tangle at my feet. I pulled out my toiletries and bath towel and then quickly walked over to the showers and shut myself into one of the cubicles. I stood still under the stingingly hot spray until I heard someone walking along the front of the shower cubicles, thumping on each closed door.

"Edward, are you in here?" Emmett called.

"Yeah." I called back.

"Hurry up, man. I told Rose that you wanted ribs and onion rings and she said we're allowed to get them. So now we have to stop on our way home and I want to get back there before the kickoff." He explained in one breath.

"Okay." I called back, laughing weakly again.

I hurriedly finished my shower and walked back to my locker, still toweling off. I laughed again when I saw Emmett already waiting for me, showered and changed, bouncing on his toes in impatience and looking exactly like Alice when she was excited. I realized I was already starting to feel better and that I had lost the panicky, jittery edge that had plagued me since the previous evening. I quickly pulled on my clothes and stuffed my gear into my bag and then jogged after Emmett, laughing, as he took huge strides out into the lobby. I tossed my locker key to Brody, working behind the front desk, not breaking stride as Emmett and I raced out of the gym and jogged to the parking garage where he kept his car.

I didn't know how I'd feel in the morning but I did know that, for the moment, I felt okay. I felt shaken and uncertain and at a complete loss as to what I could say to Bella when I next saw her but, ultimately, okay. I breathed in deeply and let the air exhale slowly from my lungs, happy at such a simple act that I had always taken for granted. I inhaled again and breathed out in a loud sigh. Emmett looked over at me curiously as he unlocked his jeep with the key fob and I smiled back at him and saw his answering grin as we each pulled open our doors and clambered in, reaching around to click in our seat belts in unison.

"We're set?" He asked as he started the engine.

"Yeah, we're all set." I agreed, answering more than what I thought he was asking.

I leaned back into my seat as Emmett pulled out of the parking garage and replayed Rosalie's confident, murmured words from earlier in my head, wondering if I could even dare to believe them and knowing that I desperately wanted to.


	11. Chapter 11

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I followed Rosalie gratefully away from the strange scene that I had just intruded on and listened distractedly as she started to list the features of the gym's new treadmills. I'd pushed into the exercise room and been brought up short by the sight of Rosalie, Edward and Emmett silently hugging, standing as still as statues, just inside the weight room off the room where I was standing. I'd been about to slip past unobtrusively when Emmett had looked up and stared directly into my eyes. I hadn't been able to read his serious expression and had felt like I couldn't walk away without alerting Edward and Rosalie that I was behind them. I'd bitten my lip unhappily when I'd seen Edward lift his head sharply and stiffen when he'd heard me, the tension almost visibly rolling off him in waves. I'd cursed myself internally then, hating that I'd challenged him on his unconscious flirting and goaded him into kissing me. I'd been about to slip away again when Rosalie had broken the mood and joked with me and Emmett about what must have occurred between them.

Rosalie now stopped between two treadmills that were lined up back against the wall of windows looking out to the lobby and facing across the exercise room. She turned me so I was facing away from where we'd left Emmett and Edward to show me the control panel of the new machines and to run me through how to select the different running programs she thought I might be interested in.

I finally climbed up onto the machine and experimentally touched the handles running past my sides and then punched through the different display options. I thanked Rosalie for her walkthrough and then tapped the treadmill's speed up to a fast walk to warm up with.

I was surprised when she climbed up onto the treadmill beside me and set her machine's speed to match my own brisk walking pace. She smiled over at me as she tucked her long blonde hair back behind her ears.

"I haven't had a chance to actually use one of these since they've arrived. I've been too excited to show them off to everyone." She explained.

"Oh, they're really cushioned under your feet." I complimented inanely, smiling as she nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

"When did you start playing squash, Rosalie?" I asked after a long beat of silence between us.

I was still impressed after watching her play last night and seeing her effortless grace, speed and athletic ability.

"Jasper and I started in middle school." She said. "We didn't play while we were in high school, after we moved to Forks, but I took it back up again in college."

"Could you compete nationally, or even, internationally?" I asked curiously.

"I played on the national women's circuit for one season." She confirmed. "There was a lot of politics and it just wasn't my scene."

I nodded thoughtfully and she smiled wickedly over at me.

"Besides, I like competing against and beating the boys." She laughed. "And it's usually good fun, except for when I play Edward or Jasper, then it's war." She flashed her glittering smile at me again.

I saw Emmett trying to sneak up on the other side of Rosalie, looking a lot like Elmer Fudd chasing rabbits.

"Heads up, Rosalie. Nine o'clock low." I muttered, not moving my lips.

She flashed a look over her left shoulder and smirked over at Emmett who straightened out of his exaggerated crouch and scowled playfully at me for a brief second. He moved swiftly to Rosalie's side and then had a hushed conversation with her that I couldn't hear over the swish of our treadmills' moving mats and our synchronized foot beats. After a short while he moved around in front of Rosalie's machine, now standing between our two treadmills. He grinned at me but I thought I could see tension around his eyes and it reminded me of Edward on Wednesday last week, when his seemingly good mood had abruptly turned stormy.

"You're looking good tonight, Bella." He told me smiling broadly.

I pretended to scowl at him. "Emmett, I've just spent over an hour battling Seattle's manic drivers and crazy roads and I know I look as tired and frazzled as I feel." I told him.

"Oh well, it must be your top then." He laughed, flicking his hand at my front.

I glanced down and remembered I was wearing a University of Washington cotton hoodie that I'd borrowed off Ben. I deepened my scowl at Emmett and bared my teeth, causing him to laugh louder.

"It's Ben's, I'm holding it to ransom until he agrees to help me get mine back off you." I gritted at him through my teeth.

"Well, good luck with that, Bella." He laughed.

I looked at him closely and definitely could read worry and stress in his eyes. I smiled briefly at him when his laugh abruptly faded and looked down at the displays in front of me, seeing without interest that I'd burnt twenty calories so far.

"Feel better soon, Bella." He said softly. "With the whole tired and frazzled thing." He added when I shot a sharp look at him.

"I'll be fine after I actually get some sleep." I assured him, thinking about my previous, mostly sleepless night.

"Yeah, that's always a good remedy." He agreed easily.

"Rose, my love, my life, I will see you at home later." He declared extravagantly, making her giggle.

"Bye, Bella!" He called over his shoulder.

"Emmett, can I _please_ have my hoodie back?" I pleaded after him and laughed myself when his laughter boomed out again.

Rosalie and I walked beside each other for another few minutes until she smiled over at me.

"Ready to run, Bella?" She asked.

I nodded and gestured for her to set the pace and then pushed my treadmill's speed up to match the moderate jog she had set.

We ran in silence for a short while before I shot a considering look over at her and she turned her head to smile at me. I ran on for another minute until I decided to broach the subject that had been sitting at the back of my thoughts since the first dinner I had gone to with them and that had flared up to the forefront of my mind last night.

"Rosalie, can I ask a question that I think is none of my business?" I asked cautiously.

"Yes, Bella. I'll tell you to butt out if it's none of your concern." She replied bluntly.

"Edward loved the girl that looks like me… that I look like… didn't he?" I asked, not knowing what she'd think of my question.

"That is actually your business, Bella." She murmured. "It's just not my business to be the one telling you about it." She added.

"Oh." I mumbled in surprise.

"It's not my business because firstly, it's Edward's story to share with you himself, and secondly, I only have, at best, second hand knowledge because Emmett and I had moved away to college when most of what happened actually went down, and so I don't know much of what truly occurred." She explained.

"Oh." I repeated.

We jogged easily next to each other while I thought over what she had told me, trying to read between the lines. I looked over at her when she blew out a noisy breath.

"I can tell you some things, I guess." She said. "Strictly from my perspective though, you get that, right?" She added quickly.

I nodded hurriedly. "Yeah, I understand. Only what you saw yourself." I rephrased her meaning.

"Exactly." She smiled over at me.

I watched her as we ran on without her saying anything else. I thought she looked like she was collecting her thoughts before speaking and so I turned my face forward to give her space and time to collect her thoughts.

"Edward and Chelsea started dating about halfway through their first year of high school." She started.

She paused and I looked over at her and saw her frowning still.

"They were the perfect couple, both very good looking, good students, she was a cheer leader and he played football. They were always in the popular crowd." She paused then.

She smiled over at me and then shook her head in at her memories. I smiled faintly back in response.

"They were good kids too, perfectly behaved. They went to parties but didn't drink or smoke anything. They even swore a Virginity Pledge and wore chastity rings to show their commitment to staying pure until marriage." She snorted then.

She touched a hand daintily to her nose and then snickered.

"What?" I gasped in shock. "Edward?"

"Yeah, I know. It's even funnier when you know his parents. Carlisle and Esme Cullen are the last people you'd believe could raise a child who wants to wait for marriage before having sex. They are very open and can be quite direct about sex and how it's integral to a happy and successful relationship." She laughed.

I shook my head in disbelief and then laughed softly myself.

"Actually, Edward used to be, and probably still is somewhere buried under his obnoxious playboy exterior, deeply romantic. It was like he was a throwback to an earlier generation or a different century." She mused. "He told me that Chelsea was his soul mate and that they'd be together forever and so it didn't matter if they had to wait a couple of years until they got married."

She shook her head again before tucking her hair back behind her ears.

"Mind you, he wanted to get married while they were still in high school and so I think he was pretty keen to end the wait. He gave Chelsea a diamond promise ring at the end of their junior year. Carlisle and Esme didn't want them to get formerly engaged until after they graduated high school." She continued.

She sighed then and a frown creased her smooth brow.

"I knew Chelsea's older sister quite well during high school. We were in the same crowd and shared a lot of activities and classes but were never actually close. From what I could see they had pretty fucked up parents and they must have been equally raised and encouraged to be the way they were." Rosalie angrily shook her head now. "They were deceitful, manipulative and spoilt little bitches. Chelsea was the worst though."

I looked over at her, anxious for her to continue.

"I would see her walk up and smack books out of kids' hands and then stand back in her crowd of mean girls and laugh and I never understood how she could gleefully enjoy it so much. She was the sort of person that you'd expect to catch pulling wings off flies just so she could watch them die slowly. She would start or spread nasty, petty rumors and you could watch the cogs in her brain turning as she made up more and more vicious details and added them to whatever tale she was repeating. I found out that both girls had tutors who completed their assignments for them which explained their good but not consistent grades." Rosalie fell silent and took a couple of breaths to calm herself.

"Chelsea never showed that side of herself to Edward though. She was always sweetness and light and innocence when she was around him. It used to burn me up to watch such a good, sweet kid being bamboozled and played by such a mean-spirited, spiteful little girl. If you tried to say anything to him though he'd just look at you and smile and then say 'but I love her'." She said and shook her head against her old frustration.

"I once approached Chelsea and told her to cut her shit out with Edward." Rosalie admitted. "She actually crossed her arms in front of her flat chest and got up in my face and asked what I was going to do about it. I told her exactly what I'd do to her if she hurt Edward and she laughed in my face. The next thing I knew she'd gone to Edward, crying big crocodile tears, and told him that I hated her and that she was scared of me and also of Emmett, because I'd poisoned him against her." She now shook her head in disbelief. "Edward spent the rest of their relationship not spending time with his big brother whenever she was around, which was a lot." Rosalie was gritting her teeth by the time she finished talking.

"Anyway, I can't tell you much more because, as I said, Em and I weren't around for their break up." She paused and then continued after a sideways glance over at me. "From what I was told by people I trust, she broke up with him just before the start of school in their senior year and she turned every poisonous, spiteful weapon in her large arsenal on him when she did it."

"Anyway, the next time I saw Edward the sweet, goofy kid was gone and he was replaced with a shutdown, moody, stereotypical adolescent." She finished.

"I think I've seen most of those Edwards." I said, responding to her last statement rather than the whole sad tale.

"Pardon?" She asked, looking at me in confusion.

"I think I've seen Edward being most of those things… Sweet, adolescent, shutdown, moody… I'm not sure about goofy and stereotypical though." I explained.

"That's just you, Bella." She said and then looked quickly away. "Well, you and family, except usually I only get to see adolescent and moody." She shrugged.

She saw me frowning and puffed out a sharp breath.

"Everyone else just gets to see the dazzling surface of Edward Cullen, serial flirt and overconfident asshole." She explained.

I frowned down at the displays in front of me, thinking about what she'd just said.

"It's a mesmerizing façade that he puts up to keep a distance from people he doesn't know." She said. "Most people accept that superficial disguise and don't look further. I personally hate the man he pretends to be but love the man he really is like a brother." She shared.

"Oh." I said, not knowing what else to say in response to her words.

"I actually blame their parents." She said lightly. "They have such a perfect, genuine, supportive, honest and loyal partnership that Em, Edward and Alice grew up expecting that to be the norm. I even think they expected everyone that they met to be as sincere and open as their parents and themselves. Sending them out into the real world, let alone to date and find their life partners, with that as their expectation must be some form of child abuse. They weren't ready to defend themselves against the lying snakes and manipulative bitches that walk around freely with the rest of us."

She smiled at me and I could see that she was making light of how lucky they had been to have such a good family while still making a point that their naivety and blind trust had been difficult for them to overcome.

"The three of them are also used to being treated differently, like they aren't normal people, because of their looks and because they've always had a lot of money. People will either assume they're arrogant snobs or will try to befriend them to take advantage of them or what they think they can get out of being around them." She supplied.

"Alice and Em both also have their walls and defenses now firmly in place. Theirs are just not as extreme as Edward's." She continued.

"Alice and Emmett?" I asked in surprise.

"Yep. Again, it's just you who they've accepted immediately, Bella. Usually they are much more standoffish, even cold with people they don't know and they stick very closely together, fiercely protecting each other's backs." She told me seriously.

"Why me?" I asked, still surprised and confused.

"Maybe it was the relief that you weren't actually Chelsea and you managed to slip through undetected while they were still shocked." She said lightly.

She looked over and caught my worried frown.

"I was just kidding, Bella. The fact that you look like Chelsea was actually a huge hurdle for them to get past." She assured me hurriedly. "I would guess maybe it's because they recognize you as a kindred spirit, someone with the same openness that they have with people they trust." She finished thoughtfully.

"Can I ask why you're sharing so much about them, Rosalie?" I asked, not quite believing she had been so forthcoming with me.

"Hmm… I probably have said too much, haven't I?" She smiled ruefully down at the displays in front of her.

I looked over at her profile and waited to see if she would answer my question. She flicked a glance over at me and then smiled at me.

"Do you want to start our cool down, Bella?" She asked and I wondered if she was stalling for time.

I nodded and quickly decreased my speed down to an easy walk. Rosalie matched the speed of her treadmill to mine and breathed in and out deeply a couple of times before smiling over at me.

"I have a few reasons that I decided to tell you all of this stuff, Bella." She said quietly.

I looked over at her and saw that she was gazing across the room.

"One reason is that it must be very hard to try and penetrate our circle of friends. We're very close and probably a little bit too comfortable with just our small group. We have also known each other for so long that we forget that a lot of things go unsaid and unexplained because they're all already known and understood by everyone." She said softly.

She looked over at me and I shrugged and nodded to concede her point.

"We've all really enjoyed your company and getting to know you in just the short time we've known you, Bella." She assured me. "Alice and I have both already organized to take the whole afternoon off next Thursday so we can join you and Angela for some proper, fun girl time before the boys join us." She added laughingly.

I chuckled myself, already excited about our plans for my birthday celebrations next week.

"The second reason is kind of related to the third reason." She said, serious again. "I think you have some pretty strong defenses in place yourself, Bella, and I wanted you to understand some of our underlying dynamics before we scared you off."

I looked over at her again and saw she was watching me carefully. I shrugged and nodded again to confirm her suspicions and then met her quick smile with my own shy one.

"The third reason comes with a request for a promise from you, Bella, but I'll ask for that after, okay?" She asked.

"Okay." I answered slowly, curious about her reason but uneasy about a promise that I might not be able to keep.

"Okay, the third reason is that I've been watching Edward around you and I can see he's been a bit… erratic. As you said yourself, he can be changeable when he's not hiding behind his shell and for these last two weeks he seems to have covered his entire spectrum and added a few new… um… ways of acting." She said carefully and seemed to be having trouble in selecting the appropriate words to use.

I again looked over at her, wondering how much she knew about what had gone on between us.

"I kind of hoped that if I tried to explain about some of their background that you might be able to see that Edward really is an okay guy and maybe be prepared to give him some time to settle down again." She rushed.

"Oh." I said, surprised by her words again. "I can already see that he is a good guy." I added after a pause.

I met Rosalie's eyes and then dropped mine away from her penetrating gaze.

"And now for my promise… Bella, I'd like to ask you to promise me that if anything happens to make you want to give up on us, or, makes you think that you can't deal with whatever it is, you'll talk to me first before you decide anything." She said softly.

I thought for a moment and then smiled over at Rosalie.

"That's a pretty easy decision, Rosalie. I promise." I said, still smiling.

"Good. And I'll promise in turn to do my best to tell you what I know and can share with you." She said, smiling also.

I could suddenly feel the tiredness in my legs and back and circled my shoulders to try and loosen the tightness I could also feel in my neck. I looked over at Rosalie again and saw that she was watching me still. I decided to ask about what I had started to suspect and stay true to my new promise to her.

"Rosalie, did… did Edward tell you that we kissed last night?" I asked uneasily, feeling a hot blush rush into my cheeks.

"He did." She confirmed. "But only because Em basically bullied it out of him… Em saw that Edward was acting a bit differently and so Em sort of pressured him to confess." She elaborated.

I had the feeling that Rosalie wasn't telling me everything but was trying to share what she could.

"Did… Did he say anything about what happened?" I asked unhappily, feeling the blush deepen and take over my whole face.

"He said that he kissed you and thought he might have hyperventilated." She said quietly.

I looked over at Rosalie and tried to smile when I saw her concerned look.

"It was awful, Rosalie. It was like he'd been punched and was winded so badly he couldn't breathe." I said unhappily, remembering his quick, shallow gasps of breath inwards and lack of corresponding breaths outwards.

"You must be a very good kisser, Bella." Rosalie laughed but there was a brittle edge to her laugh.

I smiled at her comment, understanding that she wouldn't or couldn't say anything more.

"Just think what would I have done to the poor guy if I'd let him grab my boobs." I cracked, making the easy joke even though I saw no humor in how Edward had looked last night.

In my dream I had seen Edward as a starving man, his eyes burning with hunger and want, but last night I had seen Edward the drowning man, his eyes glittering with pain and despair.

I stopped my machine and slowed my walk down even more as I followed its de-acceleration to a standstill. Rosalie followed my lead and then stepped down from her treadmill, waiting for me as I did the same.

"Bella, please be patient with Edward and don't jump to any conclusions about last night." She said quietly.

I nodded unhappily and started to walk with her out of the exercise room towards the change rooms. I saw her glance at me a couple of times in my peripheral vision.

"Emmett and I have talked about the changes we've started to see in Edward in the last two weeks. Em has always worried that Edward will burn out because he works too hard and plays hard and never takes any time off to decompress and relax." She said softly.

I looked over at her by my side, remembering the young and carefree Edward I had glimpsed on Saturday over breakfast.

"Em is hopeful that Edward is finally starting to face his demons." She shared. "And he's happy that Edward is starting to open up to him again because he has always regretted the distance between them since… well, since before Em left for college."

She smiled warmly at me now and I couldn't help but return her smile.

"Anyway, I'm hopeful as well and also grateful that you've been such a catalyst for so much positive change with us. I mean, Alice has taken to yoga passionately and Em is talking about his knee." She said lightly.

I smiled sideways at her. "Emmett told you I had been noisy about his knee brace?" I asked, matching her light tone.

"Yeah, he said he sat next to you to watch me and Edward play last night and got hit by a barrage of questions." She laughed.

I smiled again, remembering my conversation last night with Emmett asking about his knee injury and why he still wore his brace. My smile faded as I thought back how I'd shared some of Jacob's, my ex-boyfriend's, experience with a similar football injury and his rehabilitation.

"Em mentioned that your ex had gone through a similar thing." Rosalie murmured.

I dropped my eyes to the ground in front of me, thinking that in the last two days I'd talked more about Jacob than I had in the last two years.

"Yeah." I confirmed. "Emmett reminds me of him a little bit. He was big, a natural athlete, confident and so warm and happy he reminded me of sunshine. He struggled when he hurt his knee the second time. It was like he no longer trusted his knee to be strong and to hold him up. I think he was also scared about re-injuring his knee because the surgery and physical therapy were so tough to go through."

I drew in a deep breath and smiled over at Rosalie, quickly dropping my eyes again to avoid her penetrating eyes.

"Sounds like Em." She agreed softly, pushing into the change rooms.

"Now, Bella, can you please tell me the plans so far for next Thursday? Alice was telling me but was speaking so fast that I missed most of what she was saying." She asked laughingly as we separated to our lockers.

I laughed also at the mental image I got of Alice telling Rosalie about our plans for my birthday next week. Rosalie and I talked easily as we got showered and changed and walked back out into the lobby. She stopped at the front desk with me as I handed back my locker key and then gave me a quick hug as I prepared to leave.

"Thank you, Rosalie." I mumbled as I returned her light squeeze.

"You're welcome, Bella. And remember your promise, you can call me or drop in anytime that you need to." She murmured and then released me.

I smiled and waved before I turned to walk out to the street and started to walk slowly home. I replayed every word of my conversation with Rosalie, examining them from every angle and considering them against my memories of the each interaction I had had with Edward. I finally decided to accept Rosalie's plea for me to be patient and to not jump to conclusions. With effort I pushed back my fear that I could never be more than a friend to Edward because of how I looked like the girl who he had loved and who had betrayed that love by being different to who he believed her to be.

As I turned into my building I firmly blocked out all of my thoughts and feelings about last night's kiss with Edward, tonight's conversation with Rosalie and my anticipation of the awkwardness between me and Edward tomorrow if we met at the gym. Instead, I started to plan the revisions I had to reconsider after my meeting with Jane Alexander this afternoon. I let myself into my apartment and started to make a quick pasta dinner and prepare my work clothes and gym bag for the next day. I ruthlessly shut down any thoughts of Edward for the rest of the evening and finally collapsed into bed and quickly and gratefully fell asleep. I wasn't sure how I'd feel in the morning but, for tonight, I was prepared to accept Rosalie's unspoken reassurance that things between me and Edward would get better if I was only patient and prepared to trust the good man behind his confusing behaviour.


	12. Chapter 12

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

Jasper, Ben and I walked together towards Pump for our Thursday squash practice. Alice had hurried on ahead, not prepared to wait for us, because she had arranged to meet Bella and Angela on the street corner where their separate routes to the gym intersected. We were discussing Ben's and my trip to Portland tomorrow to meet with our Clients from Hell and our strategies for achieving the outcomes we wanted from our trip.

We walked into the gym and got locker keys off Jessica, behind the front desk, and I couldn't help flicking anxious glances around, expecting to see Bella at any moment. I almost sighed with relief when we pushed into the men's change room to get changed into our squash gear. I was ready before Jasper and Ben but waited to leave the change room with them instead of heading out to wait for them in the lobby as I normally would.

When we all pushed through the door into the lobby I was surprised to see Emmett waiting outside the door for us, swinging one of Rosalie's squash racquets.

"Ladies, Rose has got fitness assessments with two new customers and she said I should take her place and teach you a couple of new tricks." He said, grinning as he twirled the racquet in his hand.

"Dude, you're the one holding the racquet with the pink grip. Who are you calling a lady?" Jasper drawled.

"You, Jasper, I'm calling you a lady. Anyway, I also have to let Tanya's class know she's running late and open up the door to the studio for them." He said, smirking at Jasper.

The four of us started towards the lift and I stepped to Emmett's side as we walked.

"Will your knee be okay, Emmett?" I asked quietly and gestured towards the brace on his knee.

"Yeah, my physio has been telling me that I can leave the brace off for about a year now. I just keep putting it on, though. I don't know if it's because it's a habit or because the knee feels safer and stronger with it on." He replied, just as quietly.

"Oh, I didn't know." I said.

I reached over and squeezed his shoulder and he smiled at me and patted my hand on his shoulder. I felt bad that I didn't know the good news about Emmett's knee and also didn't know that he was having trouble weaning himself off wearing his brace. I was also surprised because he always seemed so strong and confident that to me he seemed almost invincible, and so this sign of insecurity made me reassess how well I knew him as a man and not just as my big brother. I decided that I would encourage him to take his brace off for our next workout together, probably on Monday.

We took the lift up to the second floor, arguing about our teams for doubles. Ben and Jasper refused to play against the two Cullen brothers but Jasper was whining about having to carry Emmett's slow ass and Ben was whining about my showboating and hogging of all the plays. We finally agreed without anyone getting hit with a racquet that Ben and I would double against Jasper and Emmett. We were still ribbing each other good naturedly as we stepped into the corridor between the squash courts and the yoga and aerobic studios.

"What the fuck!" Ben muttered.

I looked up from behind him and Jasper and stopped abruptly in surprise. Bella was about fifteen feet in front of us, standing with her feet splayed apart and her toes and knees turned in, she had her shoulders slouched forward and was glowering out from under her heavy scowl. She was tapping on her stomach with the fingers of one hand and holding the other hand awkwardly out from her hip. Angela and Alice were collapsed against each on the floor in front of her and were laughing helplessly.

Bella abruptly stopped what she was doing when she saw us, straightening up from her slouch and smoothing the wisps of hair that had come loose from her ponytail back off her forehead. She grinned cheekily at Ben as he stormed over to her, ignoring me, Emmett and Jasper as we trailed after Ben. Jasper, Emmett and I stopped next to Angela and Alice who had calmed their laughter and were wiping their wet cheeks.

"I do not look like that Bella." Ben gritted out between his teeth.

Bella shrugged casually and looked down disinterestedly at the nails on one hand, remaining silent and smirking around him at Angela sitting on the floor. Jasper looked to Alice for an explanation, while Emmett and I just stared between Ben and Bella, both of us smiling at the strange tableau in front of us.

"Bella was showing me how Ben plays GuitarHero." Alice said, still wiping her tears of laughter from under her eyes.

"Yeah, well you look like this." Ben bit out at Bella, oblivious to us behind him.

He stepped back from Bella to give himself more room and swung his racquet bag around to hold like a guitar. Bella crossed her arms in front of her chest and cocked an eyebrow at him as if daring him to even start what he was about to do. Ben spread his feet further than shoulder width apart and then whirled his straight right arm around in a full circle, sneering at Bella's unspoken warning. I saw Bella fight back a smile and then she dropped her arms and turned her toes and knees in to stand knock-kneed and pigeon-toed, her eyebrow still raised as if to ask Ben if he was sure he wanted to continue.

Ben circled his arm again and Bella nodded sharply and resumed her former slouched posture and started playing her imaginary GuitarHero controller again. Ben started wildly playing his racquet bag, dancing backwards and forwards on his widely spread feet and waving his head around, looking like Snoopy doing his happy dance. Bella stuck her tongue out of the corner of her mouth and glowered fiercely from under her lowered brow.

"Oh no… they… both… look… exactly… like… that." Angela gasped through her fresh laughter, setting off Alice again into helpless giggles.

Jasper and Emmett were laughing now and I was smiling widely, looking between the Bella and Ben, still a little stunned.

Ben dropped down onto his knees and started throwing his head backwards and forwards like he was head banging to heavy metal music. Bella started twitching her head to her right and poked her tongue out further.

"Not… the… tic… please… not… the… tic." Angela gasped, clutching both arms around her stomach.

I started laughing, unsure if it was Ben and Bella clowning around or Angela's helpless plea that set me off.

Ben fell onto his back and started kicking his legs in the air, still playing his racquet bag like an air guitar. Bella's hands dropped and her shoulders started shaking with her laughter. She stepped over to look down at Ben who had stopped playing soon after she had and was now lying flat on his back laughing as much as us all.

"I was never kicking my feet in the air, Ben." She laughed and reached down to help pull him to his feet.

"You know you were on the inside, Bella." He teased, slinging his arm around his shoulder when he was upright.

"Maybe." She shrugged and then stepped out from under his arm.

Bella walked to the other side of Angela and Alice and slid her feet into her flip flops, smiling down at Alice and Angela as they tried to swipe away their tears of laughter again. She looked over at Emmett, who was still quietly chuckling and was wiping his own wet cheeks on the sleeves of his t-shirt, and gave a little curtsy that made him grin broadly at her. She shifted her smile to Jasper and then me but her eyes skipped quickly away from mine when Ben suddenly laughed from beside me.

"Hey, Phoenix, you do realize that I just won at make believe GuitarHero? You laughed first and so that means that I win again." He crowed, pumping his fist in celebration.

"Hey, Seattle, you do realize that your dork factor just left the stratosphere by you saying that?" She smirked and mimicked his fist pump.

He held up his middle finger at her and she smiled prettily back before crossing her eyes and sticking her tongue out at him.

"And now they've started…" Angela groaned and buried her face in her hands in mock despair.

I coughed over the laugh I couldn't hold in anymore and dropped my eyes when Bella and Ben both turned to look at me. I heard Jasper's muffled gasp of laughter beside me and I abruptly turned my back on everyone so I wouldn't burst out laughing again. I breathed in deeply through my nose and counted to ten to compose myself and then turned back around when I felt more in control of my threatening laughter.

Bella had sat down beside Angela and was fidgeting with her water bottle, avoiding looking at Ben who was scowling at her. I stared at her in adoration, stunned by how comfortable and natural she was in front of us and how beautiful she was even when she was imitating Ben playing GuitarHero or pulling childish faces. She looked up at me and caught me staring at her. She dropped her eyes back down to her drink container in her hands, smiling slightly, and I watched in awe as a blush climbed her cheeks. Alice stood up and stamped her foot, breaking my fixation on Bella.

"Em, where's Tanya?" Alice whined, pouting.

"Shit, I forgot to tell the class Tanya would be late. Sorry, Al, I'll open up the room now." Emmett muttered.

He hurried down to the door of the studio to unlock it for the class to start filing in to the room. I belatedly noticed the rest of the class were clustered in small groups spaced along the corridor and were either openly staring at us or trying to watch us surreptitiously. I abruptly turned my face away from their curious looks, used to being stared at but uncomfortable that our fun watching Bella's and Ben's GuitarHero reenactment had been so closely observed.

"Edward, can you grab Rosalie's racquet for me?" Emmett called back at me from his position near the door.

I nodded and bent to grab Emmett's borrowed racquet and my bag off the floor. I stopped to wait for Bella to collect her stuff so I could walk beside her down to the studio.

"Today, Edward!" Emmett boomed. "C'mon, guys, I want to actually get to play before Rosalie makes it up here."

I smiled ruefully at Bella and then turned to jog with Jasper and Ben down to where Emmett was waiting. We stopped beside the benches outside our reserved court and I dropped my squash kit down. I pulled out my racquet and safety glasses and tossed Emmett my spare goggles. I rummaged in the front pocket of my bag to grab one of the squash balls I kept and then hurried to follow Emmett, Jasper and Ben out onto our court.

Ben and Jasper had already spun a racquet to decide who would serve. Our combined competiveness had turned what was meant to be a fun hit between the four of us into something with higher stakes than our Tuesday night tournament matches.

"Okay, let's make this interesting." Emmett said, smiling evilly at Jasper. "How about a little bet to liven things up a bit?"

"I'm in." Jasper eagerly said.

"What kind of bet?" Ben asked warily.

I shrugged non-committedly, used to Emmett's and Jasper's constant need to make outrageous bets on every little contest.

"Okay, we'll play one set and… the losers have to each wear the panties of the woman they love for a day." Emmett laughed.

I flashed a horrified glance at Emmett and saw he was smiling widely at me, his eyes glittering and staring straight into mine. He raised one eyebrow at me challengingly and I looked away quickly and gulped. I didn't love Bella, I couldn't love Bella, I'd only known her for two weeks… but then why had I just panicked and thought about how explain to Bella why I'd need to borrow a pair of her panties for a day?

"No." Jasper said firmly. "I can't risk that. Alice is a size zero and I want to be able to have children one day." He drawled.

"No way, Edward will throw the game just to make me have to do it when he doesn't have to. Unless you're going to make him wear your mom's underpants, which you won't!" Ben said vehemently, holding up his hands and shaking his head.

"Okay, okay…" Emmett laughed. "The A-grader of the team that loses has to pay for the next dinner for everyone."

Jasper and I looked at each other carefully, the bet was worth hundreds of dollars, and then together both nodded at Emmett.

"Deal." Jasper said, bumping fists with Emmett.

"Deal." I echoed and bumped my own fist against Emmett's.

We started playing and it was a very closely matched battle. Emmett had always been surprisingly quick and light on his feet for his size and what he lacked in experience he made up with his strength, hand eye coordination and lightening quick reflexes. He also was an expert at rattling his opponents and had Ben quaking every time Emmett moved near him on the court. Jasper finally served to win the set and Emmett crowed, dancing around the court doing his ridiculous victory dance.

Rosalie joined us on the court, holding her second racquet, and Emmett eventually left, leaving Ben to watch him walk off the court with relief while exhaling a huge sigh. I bent into a huddle with Ben to plan how to beat the impossible combination of Jasper and Rosalie. We played three sets and Ben and I lost each one, managing to win some good rallies but ultimately not coming close to challenging Jasper's and Rosalie's dominance. After our doubles match we spent time practicing our serves and returns.

We finally finished and started to file off the court with me bringing up the rear. I looked over at the benches outside the glass back wall and saw, with a sinking heart, that only Alice and Angela were waiting for us outside. I moved glumly over to my racquet bag to pack away my gear and saw that my spare racquet was missing. I looked up at Alice and Angela to ask where my racquet was and then stopped, transfixed by the sight of Angela holding Emmett's knee brace.

"Emmett borrowed your racquet." Alice told me.

I nodded sharply and then gestured at the brace in Angela's hands and raised my eyebrow questioningly.

"Bella has taken it hostage until he returns her hoodie." Angela quickly said, gripping it more tightly and shifting on the bench uneasily.

I looked towards the next court where I could hear the squeak of tennis shoes and the thunk of a squash ball hitting the walls. I looked back at Alice and Angela and then slowly starting walking towards the next court. Alice and Angela stood up and followed me closely.

"Emmett wanted Bella to try squash before she said she couldn't play." Alice hurriedly explained.

I stopped in front of glass back wall and looked in at Bella and Emmett, my eyes widening in amazement. Bella was bare foot with a light gray hoodie unzipped over her tiny yoga outfit and was awkwardly holding Rosalie's racquet in front of her. She was standing still and flinching whenever the ball came towards her before hurriedly thrusting the racquet at the ball to try and hit it. Emmett was racing around with my spare racquet, lightly returning Bella's wild shots so they bounced easily in front of where she was standing for her to try to hit again.

I felt someone step to my side and flashed a look to see Rosalie standing beside me, watching Emmett as he sped backwards and forwards across the court.

"Is she deliberately hitting it to his bad side?" I asked abruptly, worried for Emmett without his brace.

Angela snorted. "Trust me, Edward; I don't think Bella can do anything deliberately with a racquet."

We watched silently for another minute, hearing Emmett's laugh booming out and Bella's nervous squeaks whenever he ran too close to return a shot. I watched Emmett anxiously as he pivoted to chase another loose shot, lunged and snapped it backhand towards the wall in front of Bella. Bella swung at the ball but missed and then dropped her racquet to clutch her breast where the ball had hit her. She scooped up the racquet after a long second and took the ball that Emmett was now holding out to her, getting ready to serve to start playing again.

"She's really bad, isn't she?" Jasper drawled as we watched Bella swing and miss the ball as she tried to serve.

"Shut up, Jasper." Alice muttered. "She's trying her hardest."

I smiled over at Alice and saw that Jasper and Ben were standing next to her, also watching the court in front of us. I flicked another glance at Rosalie beside me. Rosalie was watching Emmett and Bella play with a small smile, looking relaxed and unconcerned by Emmett's rapid movement around the court.

"Bella's ex-boyfriend had an almost identical knee injury." Angela quietly told me from my other side.

I looked down at her, not having noticed her step to my side as I had worriedly watched Emmett in front of me. She smiled up at me briefly before returning her gaze to Bella's and Emmett's strange game. I realized abruptly that I had never thought about Bella's past beyond the knowledge that she and Angela had met at the University of Phoenix and she had moved from Phoenix to Seattle where she was now with me. I suddenly wanted to know everything about her, including about the asshole that was now her ex-boyfriend.

I let out a shaky laugh when I realized that I was jealous of Bella's ex-boyfriend, who I had never met and who I knew nothing about. I shrugged ruefully when I caught Angela's curious look and turned to watch Bella again. I winced when I saw Bella miss another fast shot that again hit in her chest and made her drop her racquet as she clutched at the same spot where the ball had hit her last time.

I coughed over my laugh when she stepped angrily up to Emmett's chest and poked him with one finger before she spun to pick up her racquet and storm back towards us, still holding her left breast. She hesitated when she saw that we were all watching her but then kept walking quickly towards the open door with her head down, trying to outpace Emmett who was laughingly following her.

"You did that deliberately, Emmett." She growled over her shoulder as she walked through the doorway.

"Bella, I swear, it was an accident." Emmett laughed.

Bella stopped next to Rosalie and held out the racquet, awkwardly holding it up by the grip with her thumb and forefinger.

"Emmett lent me your racquet, Rosalie. Thank you for the loan, I hope I didn't ding it up too badly." She said, smiling shyly as Rosalie accepted back her racquet.

Bella glared over her shoulder at Emmett who had stopped behind her and was still laughing.

"Emmett, it's not funny. It really hurts." She bit out between her teeth.

I saw she was still holding her breast but that she was trying not to smile at his laughter.

"I can take a look at that for you, Arizona. Just to make sure there's no permanent damage, of course." I said lightly, flicking my hand to gesture at Bella's breasts.

Bella snorted and flashed a look up at me before turning back towards the next bench over that held all of our gear.

"Let me think about that, Edward… um.. NO!" She called over her shoulder.

I flinched as Rosalie hit me in the stomach with the back of her hand.

"Don't be a jerk!" She hissed.

She spun away from me and stalked after Bella, glaring at Emmett as she pushed past him. Angela stepped around me and trotted over to Alice before both of them gave me a dirty look before tossing their heads and hurrying after Bella and Rosalie. The girls stopped at the next bench to collect their yoga gear and Rosalie's second racquet.

I followed them over slowly, stepping in beside Emmett and returning his smile easily.

"I have some gel that will take away some of the pain and reduce the bruising, Bella." I heard Rosalie saying as I stepped closer.

"Pain relief would be good, thanks Rosalie." Bella mumbled.

The girls quickly moved away, heading towards the lift without waiting for us. I intercepted another dark look from Alice and glanced up at Ben, Jasper and Emmett as I packed away my gear.

"Why do I have the feeling I have to apologize for something?" I muttered.

Emmett laughed loudly, clapping a hand on my shoulder. "It never hurts to apologize, little brother, even when you don't know why you're saying sorry."

Ben and Jasper laughed with him and waited while I slung my squash kit over my shoulder and fell in behind them on their way to the lift. I looked up at Jasper as he started to walk beside me.

"I once made Rosalie cry when I hit her in the boob with almost the same shot." He murmured. "I think it really hurts."

"Oh." I mumbled.

He chuckled. "Bella must be pretty tough."

"Yeah." I mumbled, thinking that when you could read her swift expressions you could see her vulnerability under her joking shell.

We kept walking together in silence and then stopped at the lift to wait with Ben and Emmett.

"Oh shit!" Emmett whispered, looking stunned.

"What?" Ben asked, looking around as if to find what had worried Emmett.

"I lost my bet with Bella… I bet her I could show her that squash was fun…" He mumbled, still looking shocked.

Jasper started to laugh. "What were the stakes?" He asked.

Emmett slowly turned to stare at Jasper with wide eyes and I started to laugh at his expression.

"I have to do a yoga class with Bella." He whispered in horror.

Ben, Jasper and I were still laughing at him when we pushed into the change rooms to get showered and dressed. As I stood under the shower I thought back to how worried and anxious I had been about seeing Bella again. I would have bet Emmett any outrageous, stupid thing he could think of that I was going to miserable and embarrassed when I saw her but instead I'd had a fun and enjoyable evening. I quickly finished showering and then toweled off, wrapping my towel around my hips to walk back to my locker.

I saw Emmett sitting in his boxers on the bench in front of his permanent locker strapping a brace around his knee. He saw me looking at his knee and shrugged, returning his attention to the strap he was adjusting.

"I keep spares in my locker." He explained, looking up at me briefly.

I nodded and kept walking to my locker. I quickly got dressed and packed my gear up and then paused when I was ready to leave. I rummaged in the side pocket of my gym bag, finding the small tub of Arnica gel I kept for bruises and squash hits and that I had last used on Tuesday night. I hefted it thoughtfully in my hand and then palmed it before grabbing my bags and walking out into the lobby. I handed in my locker key and then went to stand next to Ben while we waited for the girls to finish getting changed.

Emmett came over and stood next to me from where he had been talking with Jasper. I looked at him curiously and he just smiled at me, gently rocking back and forwards on his feet, with his hands in his pockets, while he waited for Rosalie to come out. Ben and I started organizing when and where we'd meet at the airport in the morning and I didn't notice the girls coming out of the change room until Rosalie came to stand between me and Ben. She smiled glitteringly at me and then started to congratulate Ben on the improvements in his squash game.

I looked over and saw Bella walking towards us, between Alice and Angela, from the front desk. She stopped in front of Emmett and, bending slightly, felt his left knee through his jeans and I guessed that she was checking to see if he was wearing a brace. She smiled up at him and then leant in to start a hushed conversation with him. I couldn't hear what they were saying because Ben and Jasper and stepped forwards to greet Angela and Alice and were talking loudly with each other around Bella and Emmett in the middle of them. I watched as Emmett flashed his broad smile down at Bella and then began to nod thoughtfully at something else she said before he snagged her towards him with one arm behind her shoulders and gave her a quick hug.

"Emmett, stop! I haven't forgiven you yet." She laughed, pushing back out of his hold

She flicked a look at me and then over to Rosalie. I quickly held out the tub of Arnica gel in my hand towards her.

"You can have this, it's very good for bruises." I said hurriedly.

Bella looked at the tub in my palm and then up at my face for a second. She hesitatingly reached for the tub and took it from my hand.

"Thanks, Edward." She mumbled, looking at the gel in her hand. "It's the same stuff that Rosalie had me try."

"Yeah, it's good. You should probably apply some more in a couple of hours." I said awkwardly.

She nodded down at the tub of gel in her hand, not looking at me.

"If you get confused and forget how to apply it you can always give me a call and I'll come over and help." I joked and then gasped as Rosalie pinched me sharply on my waist.

Bella scoffed a laugh and flashed a laughing look up at me before she smiled at Rosalie. She tucked the gel into her purse and then looked towards the door out onto the street.

"Sorry everyone, I have to go so I can inhale some food before I faint." She said, smiling around at all of us.

I bent down to grab my bags, ready to leave with Bella.

"Pizza, Bella?" Emmett asked and I flashed a surprised look at him.

"I was thinking about pizza, Emmett." She confirmed.

"Rosie, can we please, please, please get pizza with Bella, pretty please?" He pleaded with his bottom lip pushed out and his puppy dog eyes used to full effect.

I looked between Emmett and Rosalie, wondering what was going on because they usually headed straight home from the gym except for our Friday dinners. Rosalie nodded and then smiled at Bella.

"Just takeaway, Emmett, I have to soak out some of those hits in a very long, hot bath." Bella clarified and I wondered what hits she was referring to.

"Angie and I will tag along, it'll be good not to have to cook and wash up." Ben said, after silently conferring with Angela.

"Us too, I haven't had pizza in ages." Alice chimed from next to Bella, bouncing on her toes.

"Everyone is welcome." Bella said. "But can we please leave now? I wasn't joking about the fainting."

"Woohoo! We all get pizza and it's Edward's shout." Emmett crowed.

"That's fine, Emmett. If you want to use up my shout on pizza I'm more than happy to oblige." I laughed at him.

I knew that the hundreds of dollars I would have spent at our usual Friday night restaurant had just been reduced to under one hundred dollars. Emmett's face fell and Jasper growled at him. I smirked at him as I turned to follow the others out onto the street. I was about to skip around Ben and Angela to walk beside Bella when Rosalie threaded her arm around mine and started to walk beside me.

I looked curiously at Rosalie and returned her smile with a small one of my own, not sure what to think of her sudden affection. I flicked a glance at Emmett also walking close to my side and wondered if I should be suspicious of what felt like their protective huddle around me. I sighed and shook my head at both of them when they both looked back at me with wide, innocent eyes and then returned their warm smiles with a crooked one of my own. I pressed my arm into my side, squeezing Rosalie's arm gently, grateful for their support even though I didn't fully understand their reasons. We turned out onto the street and started following the others walking slowly in front of us. I thought back to Bella's quiet conversation with Emmett in the lobby and decided to ask him about it.

"Emmett, how did Bella know about your knee?" I asked quietly.

"She asked me why I wore a brace on Tuesday when we were watching you and Rose play." He said simply. "We got to talking."

"Angela told me tonight that her… um, her ex… had the same type of injury." I said.

I really wanted to ask what, if anything, she had said about her ex and his injury but didn't know how to without sounding like I was as obsessed with Bella as I actually felt. I glanced at Emmett out of the corner of my eye but he was smiling down the street at Alice's antics ahead of us and didn't seem like he found my statement strange.

"We talked a bit about his injury." He confirmed. "He did his knee playing ball also. He returned to playing after his first reconstruction but never tried to get back out on to the field after he did his knee the second time. He had the second reconstruction but didn't play after it."

"Oh." I mumbled.

I thought back to the amount of pain and physical rehabilitation that Emmett had had to work through to make a successful comeback to playing after his second full knee reconstruction. I then remembered how devastated he had been after he had injured the same knee the third time, in his very first game back, and when he'd been told that he wouldn't be able to play again. I also remembered how reluctant he had been to go back for his fourth and final surgery two years ago to clean up the cartilage damage that had been missed in his third reconstructive surgery.

I didn't know what else I could say and so I moved onto my next question.

"What did Bella say tonight in the lobby?" I asked.

"She told me it was good to put a brace back on if I needed to." He said and then chuckled. "She said she'd just keep confiscating each new one she saw until I ran out of my spares. She guessed I'd have about six that I keep lying around."

"How many do you have?" I asked, never having considered that he had more than one until I saw him in the locker room strapping on a different one.

"Eight." He said. "Well, seven now because she kept the one she took off me tonight."

"Oh." I mumbled again.

"She also said I should ice my knee tonight if I thought there was any swelling or heat." He said after a short beat of silence between us.

"That makes sense." I muttered.

"Yeah." Emmett said softly. "But you know, I probably wouldn't have thought of doing that and would have just panicked, thinking I'd fucked my knee up all over again, and then I would never have taken the brace off again."

"Oh." I mumbled.

We slowly walked on in silence for a short while and I felt inadequate because I didn't know what to say to Emmett about his knee. I turned my head to look at Emmett and returned his calm smile with a uncomfortable, twisted smile of my own.

"Em, I feel like a bad brother because I didn't know about your knee… You looked really good out on the court." I muttered.

"I felt really good out on the court. I thought I was going to throw up when we first walked out though, I was petrified." He chuckled. "Bella started asking me how to hold the racquet and where to hit the ball and I just forgot about my knee… mind you, I was laughing too much to stay scared. She really, really sucks, you know. She hit herself and me more times with her racquet than she hit the ball."

I huffed a laugh, remembering Bella missing the ball when she tried to serve. I also now understood Bella's reference to the hits she had taken that she needed to soak out in her planned bath. Emmett's chuckles died and he looked at me seriously for a short beat of time.

"Edward, if you'd asked how my knee was going I would have told you that it was okay and left it at that." He shrugged. "Bella just kept asking quiet questions on Tuesday like how come I still wore a brace after two years from my last surgery and if my knee got sore after a long day."

"Bella has an edge, Edward." Rosalie spoke quietly on my other side. "She's been through it all, standing beside a man who's gone through some of what Em has, but she has got more distance from our situation and so she can push Em and not get uncomfortable if he tries to dodge the issue or if he feels bad."

Rosalie gently tugged on my arm and I realized with a start that we had stopped behind the others outside Sam's pizzeria, waiting as they filed through the door in front of us. Emmett and I paused to let Rosalie walk in ahead of us and then followed her in. We hovered in front of the counter, at the back of our group, while the rest of the gang decided what to order.

"Bella's big friend and Bella's boyfriend! How are you tonight?" Sam called to us from behind the till further along the counter.

I snapped my head around to stare at him, stunned. Emmett laughed loudly and pointed exaggeratedly at Rosalie standing just in front of us.

"Sam, quiet with the boyfriend talk. My wife is standing right here, you'll get me in trouble." He laughed.

"Sam!" Bella hissed ahead of us and I could hear her easily in the silence that had fallen over our group as they turned to stare at me.

"What? I see you walking home together almost every night, you make a beautiful couple." Sam laughed, still speaking loudly and waving at the plate glass window looking out onto the street.

"Sam! It's not funny." Bella sounded miserable.

A wiry, dark haired woman walked up swiftly behind Sam and smacked the back of his head.

"Sorry, Bella. Sam was just trying to say that he wanted to offer all of you pizzas on the house." She said brightly.

She was smiling sweetly but her eyes flashed angrily as she looked at Sam. She caught the eye of a young kid standing in front of the pizza oven and gestured for him to come over to take our orders and then dragged Sam away by his elbow, hissing at him about scaring away good customers.

I followed Rosalie up to the counter to order, hearing Emmett chuckling behind me. I glanced at him sharply, wondering what the hell he thought was so funny about what had just happened.

"You still have to buy the next dinner, Edward. Pizza can't count if it's free." He laughed, pushing ahead of Rosalie and me to order, rubbing his hands together.

"Excellent." Jasper drawled behind me.

I looked over my shoulder at him and saw Bella standing between him and Alice. She was staring at the ground and I saw that her chest looked blotchy above the low scooped neck of her top and her face was a deep, painful red.

I suddenly felt hotly and fiercely angry at Sam for his thoughtless teasing that had so embarrassed Bella in front of everyone. I felt my body tense and my fists clench at my sides. I jumped, startled, when I felt Rosalie's hand rub my back soothingly. I looked at her quickly, smiling weakly before shakily letting out the breath that I had been holding. She smiled back and then nudged me forward to order.

When I stepped back from the counter I saw that Bella had pulled out her iPod and was listening to a song with Angela, sharing her earphones with Angela who was holding the earbud up to her ear. I noticed that the blotchy blush had faded from Bella's chest and neck and the color in her cheeks was slowly paling back to her normal porcelain complexion. I wanted to hear what song was playing and making Bella smile like that, her eyes dancing and her head minutely nodding to the beat of the music. I just wanted her iPod I decided and wondered what she'd say if I asked if I could download her playlists.

I felt Rosalie crowding me from behind and stepped sideways to let her pass, moving away from Bella and Angela. I shot her a worried look when she hooked her arm back through mine, not knowing why she was almost clinging to me tonight.

"Em did look really good without his brace tonight, didn't he?" She sighed happily.

I looked over to where Emmett was laughing with Jasper and Ben and smiled when I remembered how easily he had moved around the court.

"Yeah." I agreed simply.

"Do you think he'll start leaving it off now?" She asked quietly. "Did you know he even wears it around the house?"

I looked at her briefly, never having realized that she had been worried about Emmett still wearing his brace after he'd been told that he didn't need it. I considered her first question and looked over at Emmett again.

"I don't know, Rosalie, probably not if he doesn't trust his knee to be strong." I said slowly. "It might take more of Bella's magic before he feels confident enough to leave it off." I said, smiling as I looked back to Bella.

I shook my head as I saw that Alice now had her cheek pressed against Angela's as they both listened to the one earbud. Bella was laughing at Alice and Angela doing tiny, suppressed dance moves without moving their feet and without separating their heads. Rosalie laughed softly and I saw that she was watching the three girls also. I smiled at Rosalie and then returned to watching Bella.

"You can say her name, Edward." Rosalie murmured quietly.

I flashed a startled look at her but she was still watching Bella, Angela and Alice.

"You said you couldn't say her name but you call her Bella whenever you talk about her. You only use Arizona when you're talking directly to her." Rosalie explained and returned my gaze, smiling slightly.

I thought about Rosalie's words. "Yeah, I suppose so." I mumbled.

She patted my arm gently and then smiled widely up at me. "Sorry, but I _have_ to find out what song they're listening to." She laughed.

I watched as she stepped lightly over to the three girls, bumping Emmett with her hip sassily as she brushed past him. Bella smiled widely at Rosalie and then took her earbud out of her ear and held it so that Rosalie could listen to it with her. I pushed my hands into my jeans pockets and smiled as I watched the four girls listening to Bella's iPod. My eyes widened slightly as I saw Rosalie slip her arm around Bella's waist so she could stand closer to Bella to share her earbud. I turned my head as Emmett stepped to my side and widened my smile in response to his grin and then returned to watching Bella.

"Bella has seduced my wife, Edward." He chuckled.

I remembered his words from our talk at the bar so long ago and huffed a laugh. "Maybe it _is_ voodoo, Emmett."

"Nah, I think it's just Bella." He laughed back and slung his arm around my shoulders.

We watched the girls in companionable silence until Bella's order was called and she hugged Rosalie, Angela and Alice in turn before pushing her iPod into her purse and stepping up to collect her pizza. Rosalie walked back to me and Emmett and pushed between us, slipping her arms around each of our waists. Emmett moved his arm to Rosalie's shoulders and I turned to look warily at them again, seriously starting to worry about the touchy-feely-ness of both of them tonight. I rolled my eyes at their too innocent expressions as they both stared back at me with wide eyes. Bella paused in front of us and I realized that she had said already said goodbye to the others. I also realized that I wouldn't be able walk home with her because I still had to wait for my own pizza to be ready.

"Bye, guys." She said and then paused. "Sorry about Sam, Edward. He obviously thinks he is a comedian." She muttered.

"It's ok, I didn't mind." I shrugged and smiled crookedly at her when she flashed me a startled look.

"Thanks for getting so embarrassed about it, Bella." Emmett laughed.

He gestured to the pizza in her hand and laughed again at her confused and embarrassed frown.

"Admit it, Bella, it was worth it for a free pizza." He grinned.

"Um, no, it wasn't Emmett." She said lightly. "And thanks for reminding me about it."

She shook her head exasperatedly and I saw the color start to return to her cheeks.

"Bye, guys." She repeated and started to walk towards the door.

"Bye, Bella." I called after her and almost laughed at the amazed look she gave me over her shoulder.

She let herself out of the door and turned down the street towards our apartments. I watched her through the large front window until she was out of sight and then let out a happy sigh. I smiled at Rosalie as she squeezed my waist and then impulsively leant down to kiss her cheek. Not even the thought that I mightn't see Bella until Monday could dampen my suddenly ecstatic mood.

I looked at Ben consideringly then, if we managed to wrap up our business in Portland quickly tomorrow we could change to an earlier flight and make it back in time for dinner with Bella and the gang. I decided to go over our planned strategies for tomorrow after my solitary dinner and make sure we could conclude all of our business in time to catch a mid-afternoon flight home. I waited, impatient now, for my pizza to be ready and then quickly made my goodbyes to the others before hurrying home to start preparing for tomorrow.


	13. Chapter 13

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I shutdown my computer and snagged up my messenger bag and purse before hurrying to meet Angela at the elevator to head down to our Friday night dinner with Jasper, Alice, Emmett and Rosalie. Edward and Ben were flying back from their business meeting in Portland later in the evening and would miss dinner. I was quietly relieved that I would have an evening with the others without Edward's complicated, conflicted and confusing presence.

Yesterday evening had been the first time we'd had a chance to interact since our disastrous kiss on Tuesday evening and we'd ignored the issue as if the kiss and Edward's strange reaction to our kiss had never happened. Edward had seemed to have quickly recovered and had been his normal flirtatious, charming self. I was confused and only just clinging to my promise to Rosalie to be patient.

I smiled and quickened my stride as I saw Angela waiting at the lift and resolutely pushed aside my thoughts of the man who could rock my world with just one kiss and then spin it on its axis by pushing me away and running off. I jogged the remaining five strides to the elevator when its doors dinged open and pushed in to the crowded space with Angela.

"Glad the week's over, Bella?" Angela asked quietly.

"Yeah." I sighed. "I have a manuscript to finish off over the weekend but then everything should settle down a bit more."

"We're just gearing up for our busy quarter." Angela grimaced.

I smiled sympathetically and then grabbed Angela's elbow and let the exodus from the lift shuffle us out of the doors. We walked quickly out on to the street and then made easy conversation as we strolled the two blocks to the restaurant. Angela and I were both laughing as we skirted around a taxi parked across the laneway down to the restaurant and then hurried to catch up to Alice and Jasper just pushing through the restaurant door.

Emmett and Rosalie were already seated at our table for six and I slipped around to sit next to Emmett at the far end of the table. Angela sank into her seat opposite me and I listened to Alice and Jasper catching up with Emmett and Rosalie as I tried to wedge my messenger bag out of the way under my chair. I frowned at Angela when she squealed softly and clapped her hands excitedly and then followed her happy gaze across the restaurant.

I swallowed painfully when I saw Edward striding towards our table behind Ben who was hurrying to greet his now glowing wife. Edward looked like he was laughing silently as he grinned at his brother next to me but his expression and smile transformed when he flicked his eyes across to mine and I knew that something had changed between me and Edward.

Edward stood at the other end of the table next to Alice and Rosalie as he waited for the wait staff to set two more places and bring chairs for our suddenly expanded party. He had started to explain his and Ben's unexpected company to Alice and Jasper and I listened as he quickly recapped their very successful trip. I watched him in silent awe as I saw him fully in his professional mode for the first time and saw how his cocky confidence morphed into a smooth, assured and polished manner. I dragged my eyes away from his perfect face down to his loosened collar and tie and dark navy, tailored suit and blinked twice to readjust my glazed focus as I realized I'd really only noticed him in workout clothes and casual street wear before tonight.

"So, Bella, how did you go soaking out your bruises?" Emmett asked quietly at my side.

I turned my head to smile weakly at Emmett and blushed faintly before I shrugged and pushed up my sleeve. I showed him the dark purple bruise on my elbow where I had hit myself with Rosalie's racquet.

"That's the worse one." I said quietly. "Well, that one and the one on my boob, thank you very much." I griped jokingly.

Emmett examined my elbow gently and then grinned at me before pulling down the collar of his turtleneck sweater. He showed me a long, thin blue stripe and I stared at the bruise in horror with my mouth open.

"Yeah, well, I had to explain that to my wife, thank you very much." He grouched playfully.

"I am so sorry, Emmett." I breathed. "Does it hurt?" I asked worriedly.

"Not compared to the one on my ribs." He laughed.

He leaned away from me and pulled up his sweater to show me another blue bruise where I had hit him with Rosalie's racquet. I chewed on my lower lip worriedly as I examined his injury and then flashed my eyes up to his face when he laughed again. I looked at him with narrowed eyes for a beat in time as I realized he wasn't bothered by the bruises at all. I twisted away from him on my seat and lifted my blouse carefully to show him my back.

"Fuck, Bella." Emmett laughed. "How did you hit yourself there? Actually, how did you hit yourself there repeatedly?"

I hissed in a breath and flinched away from him when he prodded at one of my bruises.

"Don't poke at them, Emmett!" I complained exasperatedly.

"Bella wins." Rosalie drawled. "Now, both of you put your war wounds away, please."

I hurriedly pulled down my blouse and turned back to the table and smiled sheepishly at Rosalie. I glanced around the table and blushed when I saw everyone was looking at me with varying degrees of amusement except Edward. Edward was frowning darkly down at the table and then looked up abruptly when a waiter arrived with his chair.

"I bruise easily. They're not the worse I've had." I dismissed my bruises easily to the table in general.

"Bella, what were you doing to get worse bruises than those?" Jasper laughed disbelievingly across the table.

"Surfing." I explained simply.

"Who let you near a surfboard, Phoenix?" Ben laughed as he sat down at the head of the table between me and Angela.

"Jake." I muttered quietly.

"Oh." Ben mumbled uncomfortably.

An uneasy silence settled between me, Angela and Ben and I fidgeted with my napkin and then stood up abruptly to go to the bar. I smiled around the table at my new friends and flicked my hand towards the bar to explain my sudden movement.

"Victor of the display of the bruises gets to buy first drinks." I joked. "What are we all having?" I asked brightly.

I concentrated on remembering everyone's drinks and then carefully stepped around Ben and started to walk to the bar. I looked up from the floor in front of me in surprise when Edward lightly stepped to my side. I raised an eyebrow questioningly and then looked away from his devastating smile and easy shrug.

"I'm buying tonight, Arizona." He murmured. "I lost a bet with Emmett and Jasper."

"Oh, okay." I mumbled uncertainly as we stopped at the bar.

The bartender hurried over and I gave our orders and then eased on to a stool to sit while we waited for our drinks. I gasped when Edward lifted my blouse but couldn't move away without falling off my seat.

"Edward!" I protested as I tried to squirm away.

"I'm just looking." He murmured and then negated his soft assurance when he brushed his fingertips lightly across my side.

"Looking with your hands?" I asked pointedly.

"They look painful." He almost whispered.

"They're not… well, unless you poke at them too hard…" I mumbled. "I really do bruise easily."

"Because your skin is so fair… It's like porcelain." He murmured huskily and caressed his fingertips across my back.

"I don't know why." I muttered uncomfortably. "Edward, the whole restaurant can see my back." I complained.

"Sorry." He said abruptly and quickly lowered my shirt.

The bartender gave us a strange look when he carried over Alice's cocktail but happily took Edward's credit card to start a tab. I slipped off my stool and found myself standing too close to Edward and looked up to hold his glittering gaze helplessly for a long beat in time. The bartender returned quickly and added Ben's and Emmett's beers to the tray to complete our order. Edward lifted the loaded tray and I picked up two carafes of water and then led the way back to the table.

I leaned between Angela and Jasper to place the water on the table and then quickly moved back around to my seat. I accepted my glass of wine from Emmett as he passed it down the table and sipped it before opening my menu to select my meal. I decided to order the mushroom ravioli again because the one mouthful I had tried last time had been delicious. I closed my menu and looked around the table and caught Alice smiling at me from next to Edward at the opposite end of the table.

"How did you get interested in yoga, Bella?" She bubbled as soon as she saw she had my attention.

I cursed my fair complexion that Edward had just seemingly admired at the bar when I blushed furiously at Alice's innocent question. I grabbed my wine and sipped it when I saw Jasper sharpen his focus on my reaction and then noticed everyone waiting for my answer. I flicked a glance at Edward and saw he was smiling crookedly in anticipation of my explanation for my embarrassment.

"Um, I was curious about Tantric Yoga, Alice." I mumbled.

I winced internally at Jasper's suddenly wicked smile and pulled my eyes back to closely examine the pale gold wine in my glass. I waited for someone, anyone to say something at the table to break the breathless silence and then sighed when the silence only grew. I flicked my eyes over to Alice and smiled slightly before I returned my gaze back to my glass in my hand.

"My interest in it was very shallow and as I learnt more I realized that it wasn't really for me… So, I switched to Hatha Yoga." I admitted. "I started doing Bikram Yoga classes about two years ago." I added to try and move the conversation along.

"Tantra is all about embracing and enhancing pleasure and not denying it, isn't it, Bella?" Jasper asked teasingly.

"Um… I suppose that's a part of it, Jasper." I said hesitantly. "I don't remember that much about it, sorry." I added truthfully.

I frowned at my wine glass and then tried to organize what I remembered so I could attempt an explanation.

"One scholar said 'yoga is suppression with awareness; tantra is indulgence with awareness'." I offered. "It's about accepting that Reality is pure consciousness, pure being and pure bliss… and, um, Illusion veils Reality and separates it into opposites like pleasant and unpleasant, conscious and unconscious… and accepting those opposites binds and limits us… and so you have to work to always return to Reality which is pure consciousness, pure being and pure bliss… to be unfettered and free." I rambled.

I smiled uneasily because I was unhappy with my explanation.

"That's not quite right… I can lend you some books." I offered.

"Okay." Alice surprised me by quickly accepting my tentative offer.

"Um, I just have to say, I kind of wish I'd let some of the Secret rituals remain a secret… Especially the purging ones." I warned sheepishly.

Emmett laughed beside me and impulsively wrapped his arm around my shoulder and hugged me to his side. I smiled at him and then gasped when he mussed up my hair.

"How can you still be single, Bella?" He laughed.

I shrugged lightly and then quickly combed my fingers through my hair to try and smooth it down as the waitress arrived to take our orders for dinner. I ordered my pasta dish in turn and then turned to smile at Angela.

"I'm going to the Woodland Park Zoo tomorrow." I told her to change the topic at the table.

"Really? I haven't been to the zoo here in years." Angela said excitedly.

"Yep." I confirmed lightly. "I changed my photography course to four weeks of Saturday mornings at the zoo."

"You're going to end up with no free space on your walls, Bella." Angela laughed. "Your apartment already looks like a gallery."

"Angela, it does not." I disagreed lightly. "I only have one wall with my photos up."

"What time do you finish up with your class?" Rosalie surprised me by asking.

"Twelve o'clock… I have to get there at eight." I grimaced.

Edward coughed over his laugh next to Rosalie and I narrowed my eyes at him to warn him not to make a single comment or joke. Edward smirked back at me and I puffed out one breath of laughter and rolled my eyes before I caught Alice's small smile. I blushed faintly and turned to look at Rosalie and Emmett who were talking quietly until Rosalie flashed a wide smile in my direction.

"Would you like to meet for lunch at the zoo?" She asked. "The Rain Forest Pavilion is good for lunch and snacks."

I nodded happily and returned her wide smile with one of my own.

"Can I come too?" Alice asked quickly.

"Of course." Rosalie and I both chorused together and then grinned at each other around Emmett.

"Can I come three?" Angela asked laughingly.

"Of course." Rosalie, Alice and I all chorused together and then laughed.

"Emmett and Jasper, there is mischief in the making." Ben warned ominously. "They'll end up with matching t-shirts and getting banned from riding the carousel."

I turned on him indignantly but had to pause to fight for control over my laugh when Alice giggled.

"Ben, Angela and I have only been banned from one carousel… And that was years ago." I told him hotly.

I looked at Angela and snorted a laugh as I remembered how I'd fallen off the carousel horse I'd been clinging to behind Angela and we'd both ended up in a tangled pile laughing helplessly until they'd stopped the ride. They'd politely asked us to get off and then firmly told us not to return.

"I don't think we were technically banned… They just asked us not to come back." Angela interjected. "They didn't put our Polaroid's up or anything like that." She added quickly.

We both grinned at each other with our shared memory while the rest of the table cracked up with laughter. I winked at Alice as she wiped a tear from her eye and then got trapped by Edward's dancing gaze. I smiled and then dragged my eyes away and quickly picked up my glass and sipped my wine to distract myself from staring at the handsome, laughing man at the other end of the table.

"I think Jasper and I probably need to go along and chaperone then, Ben." Emmett responded to Ben's joking warning.

"I think that would be wise." Jasper said as he nodded solemnly.

"Well, I have to come now to make sure you two don't end up with the matching t-shirts." Ben sighed heavily. "They'll be pink." He warned.

"I'll come and keep an eye on Bella." Edward interjected. "You guys will have your hands full keeping your own girls in line."

I flashed a glance at Edward and wondered if he had just claimed me as his girl but he was smiling at Jasper and reaching out to teasingly tousle Alice's hair. She grabbed his hand quickly and glared at him to stop his threatened action.

"What about Pump?" Rosalie was asking Emmett quietly.

"I'll ask Tanya to cover for me in the gym. Brody will have the front desk handled." Emmett shrugged lightly.

"We can make an afternoon out of it." Alice added and was bouncing in her seat. "Is that okay, Bella?" She asked hastily.

"Sure." I agreed easily. "This week's class is just the African Savanna Exhibit and I'll be looking through a lens the whole time. It's a lot different to walking around with friends to see all the animals." I added lightly.

Alice beamed a blinding smile at me and I wasn't sure what I had said to make her so happy. I returned her wide smile and then flicked a quick glance at Edward and saw he was watching his sister with a gentle smile softening his handsome face. I looked away when he started to turn his head towards me and automatically smiled back when I met Angela's excited expression.

"So… When? Where? How? Why?" She laughed at one of our old jokes.

"Um… Maybe half past twelve at the Pavilion Rosalie mentioned… How, I'm not sure about everyone else but I'm catching the number five bus… And why… because we want to, Angela." I laughed.

"Sounds good." Rosalie quickly agreed. "Emmett will be starving by twelve thirty, though, and so we'll start without anyone who's late." She said with a pointed look at Edward.

"I won't be late, Rosalie." Edward said with a calm assurance.

We were interrupted by the arrival of our meals and I contrasted the mood and energy at the table to the first dinner I had attended as I started to eat my pasta. I smiled easily back at Jasper's calm regard and happily returned my attention to my ravioli. I sipped some of my wine and had just placed my glass back on the table when Jasper cleared his throat lightly.

"So, Bella, how can you still be single?" Jasper repeated Emmett's earlier joking question.

I paused with my fork halfway to my mouth and flashed him a startled look.

"Seriously?" I asked uncertainly.

"Seriously." Jasper assured me and then forked some of his steak into his mouth.

"Um, well… um, wow…" I stammered, stunned by his question.

I met his calm gaze as he chewed his mouthful and then glanced down at my plate.

"Well, I broke up with my ex-boyfriend two years ago and, I guess, I haven't really dated since then." I mumbled.

I quickly forked some of my ravioli into my mouth and kept my eyes down and hoped someone would change the topic.

"How long did you go out with him?" Jasper asked calmly.

I quickly chewed my mouthful and swallowed and then glanced around the table to find Jasper, Alice, Rosalie and Emmett were waiting for my answer. Angela and Ben were exchanging a silent look and Edward was concentrating on his food and appeared uninterested in our conversation.

"Six years." I admitted quietly. "We hooked up in college." I added and hoped the conversation would die.

I pretended to concentrate intently on my food and quickly ate more pasta.

"Why did you break up?" Alice asked softly.

I met her kind smile while I tried to finish my mouthful and knew her curiosity was natural and harmless. I would have asked a close girlfriend the same question and so I decided to answer her as best as I could.

"We never made it past the second phase of the relationship." I tried to explain clinically.

"What? You were with the guy for six years and you never made it past second base?" Emmett spluttered too loudly.

I laughed softly and bit my lower lip as I met Emmett's horrified look.

"Emmett, please." I scoffed. "They had to make up new bases for us." I joked.

I laughed when he exaggeratedly wiped his brow and muttered a quiet 'phew' and then blushed when I glanced around the table to see everyone smiling at me except Edward who was still unconcernedly eating his meal.

"Um, not bases… phases." I had to clarify. "Some guy was talking about it on the television one night and it kind of struck a chord. He said there were three phases to every relationship. Love without knowledge, knowledge without love and then love with knowledge." I explained quietly.

Everyone kept staring at me, waiting for me to continue, except Edward who was sipping his drink with his eyes on the table.

"So, the first phase, love without knowledge, is when you first fall in love and you think the sun rises and sets in their eyes… but you don't actually know anything about the person." I continued lamely.

"Lust." Edward interjected quietly.

He flashed his eyes up to meet mine and shrugged lightly before he set his glass down and picked up his cutlery again.

"No, not lust." I disagreed softly.

I frowned when Edward rolled his eyes and forked some of his chicken dish into his mouth but wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Hey." I quietly asked for his attention. "Don't dismiss me." I said softly but clearly.

I caught Rosalie's quick smile down at her plate before she smoothed her expression and I looked back at Edward. He was holding his cutlery loosely and had arched one eyebrow challengingly while he slowly chewed his mouthful and met my gaze.

"Lust is a part of it, sure… But there's more." I continued.

I felt my temper start to flare when Edward smirked and slowly and minutely shook his head to dispute my statement. I set down my fork carefully and easily held Edward's smug gaze.

"I'm talking about infatuation. Lust is different. You can feel lust for someone you don't know. You can feel lust for someone you don't even like. You can feel lust for someone that you've just met. And, I sure hope, you can feel lust for someone that you've been with for forty years and longer." I listed rapidly.

I thought I saw something flicker in his eyes before he dropped his gaze to his plate and started to cut a small bite from his dish. I continued staring at his downturned face for a beat in time before I glanced around the table and then picked up my fork again.

"Infatuation is when your heart stutters when your guy walks in the room and you smile when you hear their voice and you feel like skipping when they hold your hand." I said down to my plate of ravioli. "But it's also when you don't know the other person very well. No one is perfect but when we are infatuated with someone they can do no wrong and every little thing they do makes us feel giddy… Our heart swells when they arrive breathless and apologetic because they're late, we laugh and tease them when they leave the toilet seat up, we think it's adorable when they bolt down our home cooked meal and we can stare for hours at their cute frown when they're focusing on something." I spoke quietly.

I glanced at Edward but he was still ignoring me to concentrate on his food and so I looked around the table to see if I had bored everyone. Alice smiled at me and made a circling motion with her fork to ask me to continue. I smiled slightly at her and then returned my eyes to my plate.

"So, um, the second phase, knowledge without love, is when you move past the infatuation and start to see the other person as a real person with faults and flaws." I continued. "And sometimes you can't see past their faults and flaws. It's when you can't remember why you love them when they're late for the billionth time or you fall into the toilet in the middle of the night because they haven't put the seat back down or they eat with their mouth open or you notice they hum tunelessly when they're concentrating hard…" I tried to explain.

I flicked a look around the table and found everyone happily listening while they ate their meals except for Edward who was looking over at the bar and seemed oblivious to the conversation. I finished my wine and carefully set my empty glass back down on the table.

"And the third phase, love with knowledge, is when you accept the person and all their flaws and you love them despite their faults and sometimes because of them." I finished quietly.

I quickly ate some pasta and hoped that someone would pick up the conversation or change the topic. I looked up in surprise when the bartender replaced my empty glass with a full glass of wine and I realized that Edward must have gestured for another round of drinks to be delivered while I was talking.

"Thank you, Edward." I murmured quietly and Angela joined her softly spoken thanks onto mine.

"So, who broke it off?" Rosalie asked curiously as the bartender stepped away.

"I broke up with Jake." I admitted quietly.

"Because you didn't love him…" Alice surmised. "You said you didn't make it past the second phase which is knowledge without love." Alice reasoned.

I met Angela's concerned expression for a beat in time and then smiled weakly at Alice.

"I broke up with Jake because he didn't love me." I corrected her assumption.

I forked up my last piece of ravioli and chewed it slowly and shrugged minutely when I again saw Angela's quiet sympathy. I smiled slightly at her to try and reassure her I was okay and she matched my tiny smile and then smiled at Ben. I flashed Ben a smile but bit my bottom lip and pulled my eyes back to my empty plate when I read the deep care and concern in his eyes. I picked up my wine glass to distract myself from dwelling too much on my building emotions and carefully twirled it in my hand.

"I don't understand." Emmett confessed suddenly. "You loved him? But he didn't love you?" He asked in confusion.

"Yep." I confirmed simply.

I saw Emmett's and Alice's matching frowns of confusion and sighed softly when I knew I'd have to try and explain further.

"We were friends to start with… And then we discovered we had chemistry but once we got past that first wild, heady stage we just got stuck. I was simply his best friend that he got to mess around with naked. I spent a lot of the time hoping he loved me but I think I always knew we should have just stayed as friends." I explained awkwardly. "I always imagined that he would meet a girl in the supermarket and fall head over heels in with her at first sight." I confessed quietly.

"How do you know he didn't love you?" Jasper asked quietly. "Sometimes guys aren't good at talking about that stuff."

"And you calling it 'that stuff' perfectly illustrates your point." Rosalie drawled using air quotes around Jasper's words teasingly.

"I knew." Ben shocked me by interjecting. "I met Jacob a few times when I visited Bella with Angie. If we were out and met Jacob's friends he would introduce Bella as his best friend and not as his girlfriend or his partner… They'd been living together for a year the first time I heard him do that." He quietly added.

"Oh." Jasper muttered uncomfortably.

I met Jasper's careful gaze with a brittle smile and tried to shrug off the awkward moment.

"You'd think I would have cottoned on quicker, hey?" I tried to joke.

"You were happy, Bella… Most of the time." Angela disputed my attempt at self-depreciating humor.

"Yeah, I was… Most of the time." I agreed quietly.

We were interrupted by our waitress arriving to clear our plates and I used the break in everyone's attention to try and regain my disintegrating composure. I flicked an uneasy glance around the table and caught Edward staring at me with an unreadable expression but quickly looked away when the waitress leaned over to collect my plate. I sipped my wine and tried to think of a new discussion topic.

"So what happened? What made you break up with him?" Emmett asked and sounded genuinely interested.

"It became harder to ignore the emptiness that I started to feel. It ended up like we were almost roommates, well, at least when we weren't having sex… It just grew and grew in my head until I decided that Jake deserved to have a chance at finding his girl in the supermarket and I deserved the chance to find a guy who would truly love me. And I realized that we would never find that while we were together because what we had was comfortable and satisfying on one level." I rambled.

"And so you walked away." Edward interjected abruptly.

I stared at him in shock and disbelief at what he'd just said but he was staring down at his glass as he turned it in slow circles on the table. The silence at our table grew as I waited for him to explain his comment or at least meet my gaze until it grew too uncomfortable.

"Yeah, I guess I did." I said finally. "I walked away and broke my own heart… I walked away so we'd both get the chance to find something better because we each deserved more than what we had together." I said and my voice grew sharper as I spoke.

"He begged you to stay and you walked away." Edward muttered quietly and sounded bitter.

My mouth dropped open fractionally as I stared at the stubborn set of his jaw and the crease in his forehead as he glowered at his slowly turning glass. I felt Emmett shift in his seat beside me and saw Rosalie place her hand over his fist clenched on the table out of the corner of my eye. I laughed humorlessly and dragged my eyes back from Edward's stony profile.

"He told me to be happy and to look him up if I changed my mind." I said to my half full glass of wine. "…And I walked away."

"Ouch." Jasper mumbled under his breath.

I snorted a laugh and flashed him a genuine smile before I turned to Angela and smiled softly at her look of shocked sympathy. I hadn't told her much about my breakup with Jake other than to tell her that I had ended it and moved out. I looked back at Edward and frowned when I saw he was still stubbornly staring at the melting ice cubes in his drink. I felt my temper start to burn again as I tried to work out what his problem was and why he was shooting out barbed comments and then retreating back into his petulant silence.

"Yeah, so, I walked away and it kinda worked out great." I said sarcastically. "Jake met someone three months later… They got married last year and are expecting their first baby at Christmas time. He's really happy." I added genuinely at the end.

"Really?" Angela asked in a whisper.

"Yeah. Charlie likes to keep me updated on how well Jake's doing." I whispered back and then shrugged to dismiss her worry.

"Well, that's very mature and well adjusted of you." Edward drawled. "Ow! Alice, stop kicking me!" He growled suddenly.

I ignored Alice to stare at Edward and he met my eyes briefly before he caught Emmett's movement beside me and glared back at his brother mutinously.

"What?" Edward demanded from his brother. "I was just saying it was very mature and well adjusted of Bella to be so happy for her ex-boyfriend."

"What do you want me to say, Edward?" I demanded from him in turn and spoke over Emmett's started rebuke of his brother.

Edward flicked a look across at me and shrugged before he dropped his eyes back down to his glass clenched in his hand.

"Do you want me to say that I was devastated? Do you want me to tell you that I couldn't sleep for a month because I hadn't slept alone for so long and missed being in Jake's arms? Do you want me to describe how sick I felt when I heard he took Nessie home to Forks and proudly introduced her to my dad as his fiancé? They were engaged a month after they met." I finished quietly and my temper had been replaced with an old sadness.

I studied Edward's hand rather than try and meet his gaze or look at anyone else at the table. Edward's grip had loosened on his tumbler and he moved his hand away as I watched but I kept staring at the amber liquid in the glass.

"Do you want me to tell you how much I wanted to ring Jake and demand to know what she had that he never found in me? Do you want me to admit that I still sometimes question what was so wrong with me that he couldn't love me? … that he didn't want to marry me?" I finished in almost a whisper.

I wrenched my eyes away from his glass and stared over Angela's shoulder to the bar and tried to draw in deeper, calmer breaths. I followed the path of the bartender as he walked over to serve a man at the far end of the bar. I braced myself to meet Angela's loving, kind gaze and flicked my eyes to her face. I felt immediate, hot tears burn in my eyes when I saw her eyes were brimming with her own tears and she was biting her bottom lip to hold in what she was feeling.

"Angela!" I whined.

"Sorry, Bella." She hiccupped softly.

I stood up abruptly and gestured towards the sign to the ladies' bathroom before stepping away from the table without saying a word. I didn't trust myself to speak without breaking down and needed to compose myself before everything crashed through the dam I had built against my old hurt.

"No, she needs a minute alone." I heard Angela say raggedly behind me at the table.

I was fiercely grateful for Angela in that moment for stopping Alice or Rosalie from following me to the bathroom. I hurried my stride as I weaved between the tables and pushed into the brightly lit, tiled room with a sigh of relief. I slowly closed myself into a stall and emptied my bladder before moving to the basins to wash my hands. I met my too pale reflection and reddened eyes in the mirror and groaned quietly before hurriedly washing my hands. I wet some paper towels and held the cooling compress over my eyes while I focused on my breathing and relaxing my tense posture. I ran the cold water over my wrists and then dried my wrists and hands and wadded the paper towels into the waste bin. I paused near the door to prepare myself to return to the table of people I'd just bared my insecurities and old heartache to when they'd only showed a passing curiosity in my love life.

Pulling my hair back behind my shoulders I lifted my chin and pulled open the bathroom door and walked back towards the table. I decided I definitely needed to talk to Rosalie tomorrow afternoon to find out if Edward's boorish behaviour was just his usual manner or if I was reading his signals correctly and he had been angry or upset by our conversation. I plastered on my game face and hoped with all my might that the topic of discussion at the table had been changed in my absence.


	14. Chapter 14

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

I watched Bella walk away again and I almost roared after her to tell her to stop as she weaved her way towards the bathroom. I pushed back my chair and stood up jerkily so I could follow her and apologize but Rosalie's hand on my wrist made me pause.

"No, she needs a minute alone." Angela further stopped me as she tried to curb her own tears.

I stared at Angela as she brushed away her tears with her fingertips and then looked back at Rosalie when she tugged on my wrist to tell me to sit back down. I slowly sank back into my chair and raked a hand through my hair and tried to recover my composure.

I had been bouncing around from one emotion to another this evening and was now reeling to try to regain my usual cool equilibrium. My heart had swelled in the taxi outside the restaurant when I saw Bella skip past with Angela laughing and hurrying to get inside. My stomach had dropped when I had seen her bruises from her squash hit out with Emmett. My hand had trembled when I had traced a feather light line across the soft, creamy skin of her back. My cock had twitched when she had mentioned she had started yoga because she had wanted to learn Tantric Yoga and her blush told me she had meant Tantric Sex. My cock had hardened when I had visualized me and Bella entwined for hours until we reached our shared state of pure bliss. My face had split with my smile when Angela and Bella had admitted to getting banned from riding on a carousel. My mood had turned euphoric when we made plans to spend the afternoon at the zoo with Bella. My world had stopped and all of my awareness had focused on Bella when Jasper had asked about her ex-boyfriend.

I had hidden my obsessive interest in her story by woodenly eating my meal and drinking my scotch without tasting a single mouthful. My façade of casual disinterest had only been broken twice.

The first fracture in my pretended inattention had been when I couldn't contain my exasperation when I thought Bella was going to quote some new-age, pop psychology that she admitted she had gotten off TV. She had started to describe what she called the first phase of a relationship and I had tried to cut through her romanticized, idealistic description and called it for what it was, lust. She had floored me by, firstly, calling me on my arrogance and softly demanding the same respect she was affording me and, secondly, making me rethink my entire view on what I had thought was love with Chelsea.

Bella had me question and then accept that what I had thought was true love had actually been blinkered infatuation. I hadn't really known Chelsea and we had never progressed past that romantic, teenage infatuation until near the end when we had broken up. I had realized then that I wanted to know Bella well enough and long enough that her endearing quirks would irritate me and then love her well enough and long enough that those irritating quirks would only make me love her more.

The second and final rending of my nonchalant disregard had been when Bella had admitted that she suddenly decided to end her relationship when she felt empty and like only his roommate. I had known then that, just as Emmett had once predicted her abrupt departures from social gatherings such as after the gym or our dinners, she would have talked unemotionally with her boyfriend and then walked away without looking back. The thought that she could and would do that to me had terrified me and I had hit out with a snide comment that had pushed the honest but almost unemotional conversation into a territory where Bella had shared a tiny glimpse of her heartache. I had easily ignored the sharp pain of Alice's pointy shoe kicking my ankle as I had focused all of my fear and insecurity on the drink I was turning in slow circles on the tablecloth.

I had heard the bite of anger in Bella's response and I had wanted her to admit that she had left him a broken man as she had blithely walked away. I had bitten back to force her confession that he had begged her to stay like I would plead and bargain and promise everything to get her to stay with me. I had clenched my jaw against the stabbing pain of Alice's shoe kicking my ankle in the exact same spot. Bella's retelling of her ex-boyfriend's casual acceptance of her departure had punched me in the chest and I had numbly stared down at my drink as I tried to get over the shock.

I had known I had pricked Bella's anger when she had added that it had been good thing that she had walked away because her ex-boyfriend was happy and the sarcasm had dripped from her voice. I had still been struggling to understand how the guy who had Bella's love could so easily accept its loss and her sarcastic tone had stoked my own anger. I had lashed out with my own sarcastic rejoinder that it was mature and well-adjusted of her to be so happy for her ex-boyfriend. I'd been unable to ignore the pain that shot up to my knee when Alice tried to break my ankle with her kick.

I had immediately wanted to retract my immature jibe and had looked away from Alice's fierce expression to apologize to Bella. I had been distracted from her angry and hurt eyes when Emmett had sat forward in his seat and I had caught the full brunt of his murderous glare. My fading anger had flared again and I had wanted to tell him to butt out but had instead tried to defend my stupid jab at Bella. Her demand that I tell her what I wanted had been hotly spoken and it was the first time I had truly seen and heard her anger. I had shrugged because I didn't know what I wanted her to say. One bitter part of me wanted her to admit that she had been as broken as I was when Chelsea broke up with me and one part of me wanted her to laugh off the intense moment and call me an arrogant asshole before changing the topic.

My anger had been immediately washed away by sick remorse when I fixed my stare on her during her raw confession of her pain. Her own anger had quickly ebbed and her voice and face had told us how many tears she had cried over the sorry loser who had let her walk away. I had tried to draw her eyes back to mine with the force of my gaze so she could read my apology and stop talking but she had continued to stare blankly at my glass as she admitted her ongoing self doubt and hurt.

Our table had been poleaxed by the fact that Bella who was so pretty, open, funny, caring and sexy could think she was lacking in anyway and we had sat in breathless silence while Bella had fought for composure as she stared over at the bar. Bella had been winning her battle over her emotions until she had looked at Angela and seen Angela's brimming tears. Bella's eyes had immediately pooled with her own tears and she had abruptly left the table to leave me feeling like the biggest asshole alive.

"You only knew half of that, didn't you?" Rosalie's soft question to Angela and Ben broke through my current dazed reverie.

"Not even half." Ben admitted as he comforted his wife's hand on top of the tablecloth.

"We knew that she broke things off and moved out." Angela murmured as she smiled tremulously at Ben. "We knew it was one-sided…"

"They seemed like they should have had it all." Ben mused. "They made each other laugh and they had fun… but he never held her hand or kissed her hello or goodbye… it really was like they were just fantastic friends."

"She seems so strong…" Jasper murmured softly. "…He seems like a complete dick." He laughed suddenly.

"I always thought he was using her in a way." Ben admitted. "She was the perfect girlfriend but he wasn't that invested in their relationship so he got all the benefits without all the bullshit."

"Bullshit?" Angela asked sharply and we all laughed at Ben's suddenly scared expression.

"I meant that he didn't have to go through all the worry and fear when his girl was upset with him. You women terrify us when we don't know what's wrong or how to fix it." Ben hurriedly explained.

"Oh, well, that's alright then." Angela accepted primly and we all laughed again.

"How could he not worry if Bella was upset with him?" Emmett asked in confusion after a pause.

"From what I saw, I think Bella always hid it if she was upset or hurt." Angela murmured as she thought about her answer. "I think she knew that he would just joke about it or blow it off and so she never showed it."

"As I said, she was the perfect girlfriend." Ben joked.

We all laughed at Angela's narrowed eyed glare at her husband and Ben's worried attempt at a sheepish smile in return.

Our waitress came to take our desert and coffee orders and gestured questioningly at Bella's empty seat when we had all quickly decided what we wanted.

"Chocolate, lots of chocolate." Rosalie surprised me by murmuring.

"The Mississippi Mud Cake." Angela agreed and ordered for Bella at the same time. "And an espresso for Bella, please."

"Does she—" Alice started to ask Angela a question after the waitress had stepped away.

"Heads up, guys. Bella's coming back." Emmett interrupted Alice with his muttered warning directed at the tablecloth.

I whipped my head around from looking at Emmett to carefully examine Bella's face as she walked lightly back to our table. She appeared to be calm and composed and her smile assured everyone except me that she was okay and happy. Ben surprised me when he stood up quickly and enfolded her in a hug before she could step around him to her seat. I almost snapped at him to not push her shaky façade but swallowed my inappropriate rebuke. Ben held her for a short beat of time while he whispered in her ear before Bella laughed softly and drew back from his embrace.

Bella smiled easily around the table as she gracefully sat back down in her seat but I knew I had to apologize to her when her eyes flicked past me quickly. Rosalie again surprised me when she squeezed my knee reassuringly under the table and I looked at her and tried to match her small smile.

"Sorry." Bella apologized abruptly. "…But Angela cried first, I was doing okay until she set me off." She joked.

"I ordered you the Missippi Mud Cake." Angela quickly offered as her apology.

"Oh, well, you are completely forgiven then." Bella laughed softly.

"No, neither of you are forgiven." Emmett overrode their joking with his serious tone. "I hate it when girls cry… especially over stupid boys." He said and let them know that he was only teasing with his words but not his harsh voice.

"We're sorry, Emmett." Bella murmured contritely with wide eyes that begged for his forgiveness.

Jasper snorted a laugh as he took in Angela's matching overly sincere expression and then grinned at Ben.

"And when they admit they've been banned from a children's ride you can only laugh and forgive them, right?" He laughed.

"Yep." Ben said with a heavy sigh and slow, resigned shake of his head that made us all laugh.

Our desserts arrived and we were all distracted while Jasper and I halved our portions and lined them up in front of Alice. Alice smiled easily at Bella's surprised look at the amount of sweet food waiting for Alice's eager decimation and then lightly explained that she liked her desserts. Bella laughed softly and grinned at Alice before she concentrated on her own chocolatey dessert. Our coffees arrived and our table was mostly quiet while we all enjoyed our food and after dinner coffee.

"Do you still love him?" Alice's abrupt question froze our table. "Jake, I mean. Do you still love Jake?" She tacked on hurriedly.

My heart sank as Bella shrugged slightly as she sliced a small edge off her cake with the side of her fork. My stare should have burnt her profile as she looked up at Alice and smiled softly as she met my little sister's slightly worried expression.

"Not like that." Bella said quietly and then frowned down at her plate.

My heart stuttered as I waited for her further explanation and I felt Rosalie squeeze my knee again and I tried to relax my tense posture. Bella smiled across at Angela reassuringly and then turned her calm smile back to Alice.

"We were together a long time and had a lot of good times… and so I'll always remember Jake fondly for that." She explained.

She dropped her eyes back to her plate and seemed to be trying to organize her thoughts before she continued.

"And I grew a lot and learned a lot when I was with him and so I'll always be grateful for that." She mumbled. "But I also grew a lot and learned a lot when I walked away…" She trailed off.

I flashed my eyes to meet Bella's unhappily when she threw back my unflattering description of her break up with her asshole of an ex-boyfriend. I mouthed 'sorry' as I held her gaze and she nodded minutely before she turned her attention back to Alice. Rosalie rubbed my knee encouragingly and I quirked a tiny smile down at my plate as I spooned up some gelato.

"With a bit of time I realized that he hadn't been completely fair, or even, that honest with me… It was almost like he was taking advantage of me… It wasn't healthy. He knew how strongly I felt and was happy to accept that without returning half of what I felt." She shrugged.

She forked up some of her chocolate overloaded dessert and chewed it while we waited for her to finish her explanation.

"With a bit more time I moved on from that bitterness and now he's just a past chapter and someone I'll think of occasionally with affection but without regret. I definitely don't want to have back what we had, it wasn't enough." She finished.

She flicked an uneasy glance around the table and I saw unhappily that she avoided looking at me and knew my attempt at an apology hadn't been enough.

"That sounds cold, doesn't it?" Bella asked uncertainly.

"No." Jasper disputed. "It sounds very mature and well adjusted." He murmured.

I glared at my gelato when he threw back my petulant words from earlier and then raised my eyes carefully to look at Bella. She was smiling at Jasper and I wondered what I could say to explain my appalling behaviour. Rosalie patted my knee and then pulled her hand back and placed it back on the table.

"Bella, you should feel up my husband." She said across Emmett.

Everyone, except Bella, stared at her in shock and Rosalie snorted and then quickly raised her hand to daintily cover her nose. Bella smiled glitteringly at Rosalie and then smirked at Emmett who was frowning between the two women and looking perplexed.

"Really? You don't mind?" Bella asked with laughter evident in her voice.

"I don't mind." Rosalie shrugged easily while we all, including Emmett, looked at her in horror.

"Okay." Bella laughed and then reached across and felt Emmett's left knee through his jeans.

Understanding dawned on me and I realized that Emmett mustn't be wearing his brace tonight. I grinned at Emmett when he puffed out a laugh and then tried to duck away from Bella's hand as she reached up to mess up his hair.

"I'm not wearing my knee brace." He muttered to the others to explain Rosalie's and Bella's strange behaviour.

"Is that a good thing?" Ben asked curiously.

Emmett shrugged and then smiled over at Ben and I met Rosalie's small smile with one of my own proud smile.

"Yeah, it's time to wean myself off it." Emmett said quietly. "I've worn it for the last ten years after various surgeries."

"Then it'll be a relief to be finally rid of the thing." Ben encouraged.

"Yeah." Emmett agreed softly.

"Does your knee hurt without the brace?" Alice asked in a small voice.

Emmett laughed without humor and then looked seriously at our baby sister and I realized how little he had shared about his recovery with any of his family and friends.

"The brace never helped with the pain." He admitted. "It just minimized the movement of the joint when the ligaments were still knitting and healing where they rejoined them and when the joint was still inflamed."

"Oh." Alice mumbled. "So, the ligaments are all knitted back together now?" She half asked and half stated.

"Yes, they are." Emmett confirmed softly.

"Cool." Alice breathed happily.

"Edward, please tousle our little sister's hair for me." Emmett laughed. "I can't reach from this side of the table."

"Sure thing, Emmett." I said seriously and reached my hand towards Alice's head without looking away from Emmett.

"Edward!" Alice protested and then giggled as she caught my hand to stop my threatened action.

I grinned cheekily at Alice and then let her return to finishing her last half serving of dessert. I finished my coffee and then caught our waitress' eye and subtly motioned for our bill as well as our bar tab. She quickly brought over our check and slipped it discreetly on to the table at my elbow. I glanced at our bill to make sure it was correct before adding a generous tip and signing my name with a flourish. I handed the small folder back to her still containing my credit card that she had brought over from the bar.

I saw that Bella had stood up with Angela and Ben and was talking quietly with them as they prepared to say their goodbyes to the rest of the table. I caught Bella's eye as they stepped behind Jasper and Alice and mouthed 'wait' so she would pause until the waitress brought back my credit card and I was able to say my own goodbyes to everyone. I frowned slightly when Bella flicked her gaze over to the door without acknowledging my silent request and then quickly hugged Alice who had risen to say goodbye to Angela and Bella. I stood up myself and picked up my laptop case and turned to peck Rosalie on the cheek and give her a quick hug to thank her for looking out for me during dinner. I bumped my fist against Emmett's and then turned to say goodbye to Alice and Jasper and saw Bella just turning to follow Angela and Ben out of the restaurant.

I couldn't bear to watch her disappear when I still had to apologize again and my frustration rose with each step she took.

"Arizona, don't walk away." I called after her without thinking and without hiding the exasperation in my voice.

Bella froze but didn't turn to face me and I regretted my words and tone when I took in the stiff set of her shoulders and I helplessly lifted my hand before I let it drop limply back to my side.

"Bella, please wait…" I pleaded. "I'd like to walk back with you."

Bella said something to Ben and Angela and they continued to the door but Bella turned and slowly walked back to the table. She briefly met my gaze but glanced behind me to smile at Rosalie before I could read the expression in her eyes. I saw our waitress returning with my credit card and I quickly hugged Alice and clenched my hand to bump against Jasper's outstretched fist. I pulled out my wallet as I accepted my credit card back and slipped it into its slot before shoving my wallet into my back pocket and smiling at Bella.

Bella was watching me warily and my smile faded as I gestured for her to lead the way out of the restaurant. I followed her closely as she strode gracefully around the tables to the exit while I desperately tried to work out how to explain my rudeness during the evening. I realized I would just have to be honest and hope she would accept my apology. I quickly stepped around Bella to hold open the door for her and she stepped out into the laneway with a quick smile and quietly murmured thank you.

We walked out of the laneway and turned towards our apartments in silence. I glanced at Bella and she was watching the ground in front of her feet as we walked and I knew I would have to break the quiet tension between us before it grew to be suffocating.

"Your ex-boyfriend was a fucking idiot." I murmured as I looked ahead of us down the street.

Bella laughed softly and I looked quickly at her and saw she was now smiling at the ground in front of her feet.

"Ben told me the exact same thing when I came back from the bathroom." She admitted lightly.

"Ben is a wise man." I matched her easy tone.

I chuckled when Bella snorted a laugh but grew serious again and the uneasy silence between us returned.

"Your ex-boyfriend was a fucking idiot… but I'm an arrogant asshole." I confessed ruefully.

"Only occasionally." Bella softened her agreement with a quick smile that I was relieved to see.

"I'm sorry, Bella." I apologized quietly.

Bella smiled her acceptance and then looked up to watch the traffic signals as we paused at an intersection to wait for our turn to cross the street. I saw her glance at me in my peripheral vision and waited for her to say what she wanted to say.

"Do you do that in meetings and in the boardroom?" She asked suddenly.

"Do what?" I asked hesitantly.

"Sit back and watch and then shoot out barbed comments?" She clarified her question.

I winced at her assessment and looked at her as I seriously considered my answer to her question and then nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I guess I do sometimes. It can be very effective… It's rude and inappropriate across the dinner table though, sorry." I apologized again.

"But you don't do it all of the time?" Bella pushed me to explain further.

"No… I do it deliberately sometimes when someone's getting carried away to make them pause… Sometimes I find myself doing it when I'm frustrated or annoyed." I admitted quietly because I owed her the truth.

"Were you frustrated or annoyed tonight?" She asked as we started to cross the street with the walk signal.

"I was off balance." I explained hesitantly. "I made some assumptions… in my arrogance." I added to, again, admit my fault.

Bella nodded thoughtfully and we walked in silence for half a block and I wondered if I owed her more of an explanation. I drew in a deep breath and caught the quick glance that Bella flicked at me and knew I had to better explain my bad behaviour.

"It sometimes seems like I'm always watching you walk away with my unsaid apology souring my mouth." I told her sheepishly. "Tonight wasn't the first time I've owed you an apology… You leave so suddenly that I'm always left still struggling to adjust to what happened and I have to just watch you walk away."

"Oh, I didn't know." Bella mumbled. "How do you mean?" She asked suddenly after a short pause.

"Sometimes I find your rapid departures unexpected." I tried to explain carefully so I didn't offend her. "I find you've made your polite excuses and are on your way before I've even noticed that you're ready to leave."

"Oh, I didn't know." She repeated softly.

"It's one of your endearing quirks." I tried to hint at my infatuation.

Bella snorted a laugh and flashed me a quick look before we both jogged to catch the changing lights at the next intersection.

"So you assumed I left Jake easily and politely?" Bella asked after we had slowed to a walk after crossing the street.

"Yeah." I muttered. "I assume now that I was wrong?" I tried to joke.

"Well, it wasn't easy and it wasn't a rapid decision." She admitted. "I suppose at the end there wasn't enough emotion left for it to be anything but polite." She added softly.

"Oh." I mumbled and didn't know what I could say to take away her old pain.

"It wasn't unexpected." She blurted out suddenly. "He knew I was unhappy… I had talked to him a few of times about how I was feeling… he always told me I was being silly." She trailed off uncomfortably.

"Fucking idiot." I muttered under my breath.

Bella's soft laugh made me realize she had heard my harsh, whispered exclamation.

"Sorry." I muttered and raked a hand through my hair.

"He wasn't stupid." Bella murmured quietly and I shook my head at her attempted defense of her ex-boyfriend.

"From where I'm standing he sounds like the stupidest guy alive." I murmured.

Bella flashed a wide smile up at me and I smiled crookedly back down at her before we paused at the next intersection and then smiled at each other before we both darted across between a gap in the traffic. Bella laughed breathlessly as she leapt onto the curb on the other side and we slowed back to a walk.

"I would have begged you to stay." I suddenly declared some of my feelings for Bella.

I watched Bella studying my profile out of my corner of my eye as I kept my head turned in the direction we were walking. She let the silence grow between us until I started to sickly regret my rash and ill-considered declaration.

"I wouldn't have needed to leave." Bella finally said and the acceptance and promise in her words didn't match her light tone.

"Probably not." I agreed just as lightly and easily.

I imagined I heard Bella sigh and that her exhaled breath sounded happy and I smiled down at my feet. I shot Bella a sideways glance as we stopped at the next intersection and she huffed a short laugh when our furtive looks met. She quickly turned her face to scan the traffic for a break in the flow and I studied her profile as she concentrated on the passing cars. I took off with her as she dashed across the street and then casually resumed walking on the other side.

We both slowed as we passed the gym and looked through the huge plate window in to the brightly lit exercise room. The gym looked almost deserted and I thought about Emmett as we strolled slowly past. I flicked a look at Bella and saw she was craning her head to peer through to the weight room beyond the treadmills and ellipticals.

"Would you mind if I worked out with you and Emmett on Monday night?" Bella asked when we had passed the gym.

"Not at all." I murmured softly.

"Cool… Would you mind if we did a lower body work out?" She asked quickly.

"No, I mixed it up on Wednesday and so I think I'm due for one." I said lightly and fought not to remember how mixed up I truly was on Wednesday.

"Cool." Bella repeated. "I'll invite myself to crash your workout and you say we're doing legs and lower body." She planned.

"Is this step two of the campaign to get Emmett out of his brace?" I asked casually.

"I'm actually hoping it's step three… I hope he turns up at the zoo tomorrow not wearing one." Bella confessed quietly.

"He kind of has to now, doesn't he? He's just told everyone tonight that he is okay without it." I murmured confidently.

I slowed down and looked more closely at Bella when I caught her slight shrug at my assured statement. Bella smiled carefully at me but then dropped her eyes to the ground in front of her feet.

"No one will question him if he says that his knee felt sore or tired when he woke up." She said quietly. "I don't know Emmett that well, sorry. Maybe he'll find it easier to give it up than I'm expecting." She mumbled.

"You're expecting him to have trouble…?" I stated more than asked.

"I think putting on his brace is second nature now… He'll feel naked and vulnerable without it." Bella said quietly. "That's why, on Monday, I'll push him if he resists taking his brace off for our workout… I'll be bad cop if you'll be good cop." She bargained.

"I can be good cop." I agreed easily. "It'll be a nice change from my day job." I joked.

"It won't be nice. You might hate me for upsetting your brother. I play bad cop really well." She warned me.

"So, you're actually expecting him to have a lot of trouble giving up his brace." I stated.

"Yep… Especially if it's a big deal when he doesn't wear it to sit down and eat a meal with friends and family." Bella admitted.

"I hadn't thought about it like that." I muttered down at feet.

"I'm not making light of his situation." Bella assured me hurriedly. "I've never injured my knee but, from what I understand, when you do both ligaments the knee is very unstable… It will collapse out from under you if you put weight on it wrong… I think guys like Emmett hold on to that uncertainty even after the ligaments are repaired and the knee is strong and reliable again… Apparently, even stepping off a curb or taking the stairs is a big deal with a blown knee. I bet you that Emmett never jaywalks… even when he is wearing his brace." She continued quietly.

She glanced at me as we paused at the last intersection before the final half block to our apartments. We both jogged across the street in a big gap between the fast moving traffic. I reached out and took her hand and squeezed it lightly as we slowed back to a walk. I breathed through the jolt of awareness that sparked up my arm at the feel of her soft palm in my hand.

"I didn't think you were making light of Emmett and his brace." I murmured. "I was just thinking… and worrying. Emmett only ever showed us glimpses of his frustration and his pain during his recoveries. _He_ made light of it, more often than not."

Bella smiled quickly at me and then turned her head down to watch the ground in front of her feet. I saw that she was blushing faintly and remembered her words from earlier when she had described her understanding of infatuation. I squeezed her fingers gently and caught the small smile that lifted her cheek and I smiled slightly ahead of us towards our apartments.

"You feel like skipping right now, don't you?" I teased.

I laughed softly at her quick gasp and how she tugged her hand out of mine and folded her arms across her chest. I reached across her back and slipped my hand onto her waist and snugged her closer into my body. I smiled crookedly down into her startled eyes and breathed through the jolt of awareness that sparked through my whole body.

"How about now?" I asked cheekily.

"Edward!" Bella protested with a laugh.

I opened and closed my hand on her waist and smiled down into her shining, upturned face and wanted to kiss her desperately. I looked away as we approached closer to her building and smiled wider as I decided to joke with her some more.

"It's okay if you do, Arizona." I teased. "It feels kinda right." I added lightly.

I bit back my laugh when I felt Bella shrug one shoulder and I knew she was feigning her nonchalance.

"I suppose." She agreed with pretended casualness.

I laughed softly and stepped around in front of her without removing my hand from her waist as we stopped outside her building. My movement pulled Bella into my body and she hesitantly unfolded her arms from her chest and placed her hands lightly on my shoulders. I bent my head down towards hers and tried to read any sign in her eyes that she didn't want my kiss.

"Don't move." I half warned and half asked.

I slowly lowered my head and brushed my lips against hers and knew that I wouldn't panic or freeze now. I pulled my head back slightly and smiled crookedly as I stared into her beautiful, warm brown eyes and thought of a way I could address my last disastrous attempt at kissing her on Tuesday.

"And don't be such a good kisser." I told her seriously. "You stole my breath away last time." I joked in the same solemn tone.

"Edward!" Bella protested with a laugh.

I swooped down and kissed away the end of her laugh. I kissed her languidly and adoringly and groaned silently when Bella melted against my body and eagerly kissed me back. I kissed her deeply and lovingly and groaned audibly when Bella ran her hands into my hair and pressed harder against my aching cock tenting my business trousers. I kissed her hungrily and passionately and moaned brokenly when Bella tugged my hair to pull my head closer and urge our kiss to a wilder and needier level.

I reluctantly tore my mouth away and gasped in needed air before I pressed a final lingering kiss to her mouth and then loosened my hold around her back. I smiled in to her dancing eyes and couldn't resist another diving, teasing kiss but then forced myself to straighten away from her and take a tiny step back so one inch separated our bodies.

"I'm going to get us arrested if I don't stop kissing you, Bella." I warned huskily.

Bella nodded slightly and appeared a little dazed as she smiled up in to my eyes. I hid my smile as she blinked rapidly and then dropped her gaze to focus on my loosened collar. I pulled my arm back from around her waist and quickly untucked my shirt to futilely try to hide my obvious arousal. I huffed a laugh when Bella's eyes widened fractionally and she blushed faintly before I snaked my arm back around her waist to hold her in a loose embrace.

"We should probably go on a date." I murmured after lightly clearing my throat.

"Probably." Bella agreed. "…The zoo, tomorrow, doesn't count?" She asked after a pause.

"Our first date is not going to be a quadruple date with my brother and sister and my work colleagues." I said firmly.

"Oh, okay." She smiled.

"It has to be a proper date." I informed her quickly. "I have to bring you flowers, you have to wear a pretty dress and I have to buy you dinner at a fancy restaurant… There may be dancing and I'll definitely walk you to your door at the end of the night." I added lightly.

"Okay." Bella agreed hesitantly. "You're making it sound a lot like a prom date, Edward." She accused.

I shrugged and then grinned cheekily.

"I'll bring a flask of cheap liquor and we'll hide it in your purse and sneak sips from it throughout the night." I laughed.

Bella snorted a laugh and shook her head down at her feet. I kissed the top of her head and smiled deep into her eyes when she raised her head and met my gaze.

"Will you be too tired after a day at the zoo to go out tomorrow night?" I asked softly.

"I have a manuscript for work. It's from my difficult Maple Valley author and it has to be done by Monday." She said unhappily.

"I have a mountain of documentation to finalize before Monday after my trip today." I admitted with a grimace.

Bella smiled sympathetically and I marveled at how beautiful she looked before I remembered I was asking her out on a date.

"Sunday? Monday? Tuesday? Wednesday? Thursday? Friday?" I asked rapidly.

"Um… Probably not Sunday because I might still be struggling with this manuscript… Monday we'll probably be in shitty moods… Tuesday or Wednesday would be good. Thursday is my birthday and we already have plans, don't forget… On Friday, I'm renting a car and driving down to see my family for the weekend." She said with a frown as she thought hard.

"Okay… Would you go out to dinner with me on Tuesday?" I asked formally. "After yoga and squash." I tacked on hurriedly.

"I'd like that." Bella smiled.

"Excellent." I breathed and swooped down to kiss her again.

Bella broke our kiss too soon and I frowned when she took a small step away from me so we were separated by half a foot.

"_I'll_ get us arrested if you keep kissing me, Edward." She joked.

I laughed delightedly and took my hand from behind her back to grab her hand. I stared down at her small hand clasped in mine and wondered why I had worried about getting involved with Bella.

"Can I give you a lift to the zoo tomorrow morning?" I asked her hand.

"No, I've got my bus trip all planned." She gracefully declined. "I'll see you there at twelve-thirty." She started her goodbyes.

"Yeah, I'll see you at twelve-thirty at the Rainforest Pavilion." I confirmed. "And at the gym on Tuesday night for our date." I reminded her.

Bella smiled happily and quickly nodded her head.

"Goodnight, Bella." I murmured and closed the distance between us to kiss her gently.

"Goodnight." She breathed.

She spun away and walked quickly to the door into her building. I smiled crookedly at her as she glanced over her shoulder and then slowly turned to walk the one hundred yards to my door. As I walked I pondered the dramatic shift in me that I suspected went soul deep and had click into place last night but been cemented, irreversibly, tonight. After ten years of an unchanging, strong belief that I was happy with casual and emotionally unattached flings, I now wanted more. Last night was the first night that I'd thought of my usual quiet and relaxing dinner alone as a solitary and lonely experience and I had wanted my empty apartment to be filled with the sound of Bella's laughter and warm voice. Tonight was the first night I understood that I was deeply and irrevocably in infatuation with Bella Swan and was the first time I knew I wanted to love her only more.

I pushed into my building and made my way quickly to the stairs, too impatient to wait for the elevator. I ran up the seven flights of stairs and felt myself brimming with happiness and excitement. I let myself into my apartment and changed out of my suit before I made my way over to my piano. The sweet melody that had haunted me last week was transforming from a hesitant, tripping tune into a surer, anticipatory air that both soothed me and made me excited. I tinkered on the piano for an hour before I closed its lid and slowly got ready for bed, looking forward to spending the afternoon tomorrow with Bella and my family and friends.


	15. Chapter 15

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I slowly walked beside Felix from my photography class as we both scrolled through the images we had captured in the African Savanna Exhibit on our digital SLR cameras. I was blindly following Felix to the Rainforest Food Pavilion where I was meeting Edward and the others for lunch while I walked with my head bent over my camera.

"Who _is_ that beautiful man?" Felix murmured softly at my side.

I snapped my head up but already knew he was referring to Edward and followed his gaze to where Edward was watching us walk towards the bench he was sitting on with Rosalie and Emmett. Edward was wearing his mirrored aviator sunglasses and his face was expressionless but I could sense his intensity as he tracked us as we strolled closer.

"That's Edward." I mumbled.

"Please tell me you're tapping that fine ass." Felix kept his voice low.

I burst out laughing and flashed Felix a wide smile before I waved goodbye lamely and then hurried the last ten strides over to Edward.

"See you in two weeks, Felix." I called over my shoulder.

"See you in the tropics, Bella." Felix returned lightly.

I frowned as Edward kept watching Felix's back as he continued walking away and didn't greet me but I forced myself to smile at Emmett and Rosalie. I fixed all of my attention on Rosalie when I met Emmett's dark scowl and wondered what was wrong with the Cullen brothers today.

"Hi, Rosalie." I greeted softly.

"Hi." She smiled. "New friend, Bella?" Rosalie asked lightly.

"Yep… Felix." I mumbled. "His boyfriend had the same idea as us and is meeting him in the Food Pavilion for lunch." I added.

Edward immediately dropped his head to look down at the ground in front of where he was sitting forward on the bench with his elbows propped on his knees. I ignored his strange behavior and swung my backpack off my shoulder and gently placed it on the ground before I knelt down beside it and pulled out my camera bag. I concentrated on changing out the zoom lens I'd been using in my class for the fixed lens I would use to snap shots with for the rest of the day. I raised my camera quickly and got a candid shot of Edward and Rosalie sharing a look and Emmett glowering at the camera.

"Say cheese." I said belatedly as I smiled down at the viewfinder showing the image I'd just captured.

"Nice frown, Em." Jasper laughed close behind my back.

I smiled up at Jasper and Alice who were leaning over my shoulder and I clicked off a picture of them without raising the camera before quickly looking down at the viewfinder. I smiled and held up my camera for Alice to look at the surprisingly good shot of her and Jasper from my strange angle.

"I want a copy of that, Bella." Jasper told me seriously. "And of the one where Em looks like you just kicked his puppy." He added laughingly.

"Sure." I agreed easily. "I can re-size them and email them… or I might put them up on a photo-sharing website." I offered.

"Can I see the kicked puppy shot?" Rosalie asked curiously.

I nodded and then frowned down at my camera as I put it into viewer mode and then scrolled back to the image. I stood up and stepped over in front of Rosalie and then casually sat on Emmett's left knee while I faced Rosalie and held out the camera. I felt Emmett freeze as I nonchalantly perched on his bad, brace-free knee. I shifted my weight on Emmett's knee so I could show him the viewfinder over my shoulder after Rosalie had laughed lightly when she saw the shot. I flashed a smile back at him and then resettled my weight as I turned back to Rosalie and scrolled to my last shot of Alice and Jasper smiling down over the camera. I offered the camera for Rosalie to look at briefly and then twisted on Emmett's knee to show him the viewfinder.

"That's a really good shot of Alice and Jasper." Rosalie complimented.

I shrugged and rocked my weight around on Emmett's knee as I twisted back to face her again.

"It's a really good camera. In this mode it really is point and click." I deflected her praise. "Plus they're both easy on the lens to start with." I added lightly.

"Can I take a photo of you guys together on the bench?" Alice asked.

"Y—" I started to agree.

"Not wearing that hat." Emmett growled over the top of my reply.

I gasped and whipped around on his knee when he plucked my Sun Devils baseball cap off my head and belatedly grabbed at my now bare head. I swiveled around to glare at Edward when I heard his soft chuckle but he was grinning at his brother. I resignedly turned back to Alice and pulled my camera's strap over my head and handed her the DSLR. I pointed out the button she needed to press and she nodded seriously and then stepped back to frame her shot.

"Wait! Rosalie should be on Emmett's knee." Edward called suddenly.

I stood up quickly and stepped forward while Rosalie shifted onto Emmett's lap and then yelped when Edward caught me around my waist and pulled me down onto his lap. I gasped a laugh as I took in his cheeky smirk but then turned away from his breathtaking beauty when Alice giggled. She was looking down at the viewfinder before she turned her wide, glittering smile up at me and Edward.

"You definitely want a copy of this shot, Edward." Jasper drawled as he looked over Alice's shoulder.

Alice pointed the camera at us again and we all said cheese when she told us to before she checked her shot in the viewfinder and walked lightly over and handed me the camera. I concentrated as I brought her last picture up on the viewfinder and then showed Rosalie and Emmett the shot. Rosalie smiled widely at Alice and Emmett nodded approvingly before I showed the image to Edward over my shoulder. I scrolled back to her first shot which had captured me sitting on Edward's lap laughing up into his wicked grin. I showed Edward the picture on the viewfinder and smiled when I felt his silent laughter. I turned the camera so Emmett and Rosalie could see the shot and then ducked my head back through the camera's neck strap and tried to stand. I gave Edward an arch look over my shoulder when he didn't release my waist to let me stand and then puffed out an exasperated sigh when he laughed lightly before he finally let me go.

I stood up quickly and walked over to my backpack to zip it closed around my camera case before I shrugged it on. Edward stopped me as I picked it up and he took it off me and slung it over his shoulder with a quick smile. I met his smile uncertainly and caught my bottom lip with my tooth as I worried about his already mercurial mood today.

"Let me carry it to say sorry for not saying hello properly." He murmured so only I would hear. "Hello, Bella." He added softly.

"Hi." I replied just as quietly. "I'll forgive you if you help get my baseball cap back." I offered graciously with a smirk.

Edward nodded seriously and then quirked a crooked grin.

"Deal… but I'm still carrying your backpack." He told me lightly.

"Okay." I accepted. "Thanks." I added quickly.

I spun around when Alice hollered down the path as she spotted Ben and Angela walking in our direction. I smiled up at Edward when I felt him step closer and place his hand against my lower back.

"Was bouncing around on Emmett's knee step two of Operation 'Get Emmett Out Of His Knee Brace'?" He asked quietly.

"Part one of step two." I nodded. "We really need a better name than that… One with a cool acronym." I joked.

"I'll work on it." Edward murmured as we both turned to greet Angela and Ben.

I stepped to Angela's side and we turned to walk into the Food Pavilion with Alice and Rosalie while the guys walked behind us joking and laughing. We walked around once we were inside to decide what to eat and Alice peeled off with Jasper, Emmett and Ben to get a cheese burger while I queued behind Angela and Rosalie with Edward to order a sub sandwich. I stepped around Edward to get my wallet out of my backpack and admired his ass in his khaki cargo pants and his broad, defined shoulders in his snug black t-shirt.

"Take a picture, it lasts longer." A teasing male voice said behind me in the queue.

"Hi, Felix." I muttered without looking around as I zipped the front pocket of my bag on Edward's shoulder closed.

I turned around and smiled at Felix and the guy next to him who I assumed was his boyfriend, Demitri. I saw Demitri's eyes widen slightly and his smile appeared to freeze as he looked over my shoulder. I glanced back and saw that Edward had turned and was smiling widely at Felix. I blushed faintly when I realized that Edward knew I'd been checking out his ass because of Felix's teasing comment.

"Edward, this is Felix who's in my photography class… and this is Demitri?" I ended up asking because we hadn't been properly introduced.

"Sorry." Felix muttered and appeared slightly dazzled himself. "Demitri, this is Bella and Edward. Bella and Edward this is Demitri."

"Hi, Felix and Demitri. It's nice to meet you." Edward murmured smoothly.

Edward offered his handshake to both Felix and Demitri and then began to make easy conversation with Felix about our class. The queue moved up ahead of us and I nudged Edward to get him to follow the line.

"Please, _please_ tell me you're tapping that fine ass." Felix murmured near my ear as we stepped forward after Edward.

I saw Edward's shoulders shake with his silent laughter and knew he'd again heard Felix's too loud teasing.

"Cut it out, Felix!" I muttered under my breath.

I quickly moved to Edward's side while I picked up my camera hanging around my neck and fiddled with it to turn it back on and adjust its settings. I spun and captured a good shot of Felix and Demitri smiling into each other's eyes in the queue behind us and then took a picture of Edward's smug smirk as he glanced over at me as we stepped forward with the line again. I ordered and paid for my turkey sub and then frowned slightly at Edward's order of a salad sub with no cheese, meat or dressings. He caught my expression and smiled at me as he tucked his change into his wallet.

"My body is —" He started to drawl.

"Your temple… I remember." I finished for him.

"Yeah, worship services are held twice on Sundays." He murmured so Rosalie and Angela wouldn't hear. "Just in case you were wondering, Arizona." He added with a soft laugh.

I huffed a laugh and then turned to Angela and Rosalie when they called me to look at the map of the zoo that they were poring over. I stepped to Rosalie's side to see the route they were proposing and then started slightly at the zap of awareness I felt when Edward stepped behind me and placed his hand on my hip so he could look at the map over my shoulder. Edward squeezed my hip lightly and then shifted back an inch so that his hard chest was no longer pressing against my upper back and his hips weren't brushing against the seat of my shorts. I chewed on my lower lip as I tried to concentrate on Angela's rapid speech and Rosalie's finger tracing around the paths through the exhibits.

I blushed faintly when Rosalie flashed me a knowing smile and was relieved when her order was called with Angela's and they both stepped forward to collect their sandwiches. I looked back at Edward and met his dark gaze before he dropped his eyes to stare at my mouth. I released my bottom lip out from under my tooth and moistened my lips without thinking and then froze when Edward gripped my hip tightly and I heard his almost silent groan. He pulled his eyes up to meet mine and I got trapped in his darkly gleaming gaze for an endless beat of time. He crooked at grin down at me when our orders were called and then stepped around me to pick up our sandwiches from the counter.

I took the plate Edward handed me and followed Rosalie and Angela over to the table where the others were already waiting for us to arrive. I sat down next to Alice and carefully unhooked my camera from around my neck and placed it on the table in front of my plate. I smirked at Edward sitting on my other side when Emmett frowned at Edward's sandwich and then raised an imperious eyebrow demanding an answer from his younger brother.

"I had the Big Breakfast at Zefani's." Edward explained simply.

Emmett nodded quickly and grinned and then started devouring one of his two cheeseburgers. I picked up my own sub as was about to take a hungry bite when I caught Jasper's steady gaze. I groaned internally and set down my sandwich and waited for his question.

"Did you say your father live in Forks?" Jasper asked after flashing me a quick grin when he saw I was expecting him to talk.

"Yep." I answered lightly.

I picked up my sandwich again and raised it to my mouth but hesitated and looked at Jasper to make sure he was finished with his questioning. Jasper smiled easily and made as if he was going to start eating and so I took a bite out of my sandwich.

"Would I know him?" Jasper asked with a cheeky grin.

I narrowed my eyes at him playfully while I tried to chew my food and swallow quickly so I could answer his question.

"Yep." I repeated just as cheekily when I'd finished my mouthful.

"Everyone in Forks knows Bella's father." Angela added softly.

I flashed a grin at Angela and then quickly took a huge bite of my sandwich and chewed it slowly while I met Jasper's thoughtful gaze with a smile in my eyes.

"Really?" Emmett asked quickly.

Angela and I both nodded silently while we chewed our mouthfuls and I quickly took another bite before Jasper could ask me another question. I met Ben's amused expression at the other end of the table and winked before I took another big bite of my sub. I pretended a serious contemplation of my sandwich as I slowly chewed and saw Jasper shift impatiently in his seat out of the corner of my eye.

"Ben? Care to explain?" Jasper finally got sick of waiting.

Jasper smirked back at my outraged expression and I felt Edward laugh beside me and flashed him a quick smile.

"There's nothing to explain." Ben mumbled. "There's only one Swan in Forks." He added and was smiling down at his plate.

I saw the realization of who my father was hit Jasper at the same time as I sensed Edward stiffen abruptly and heard his chair scrape backwards an inch.

"Your father is Chief Swan!" Jasper gasped.

"Yep." I confirmed as I looked uncertainly at Edward.

Edward's face had blanched and he was staring back at me in shock. I quickly turned back to face the table and picked up my sandwich to have something to occupy my hands.

"I take it that you two know Charlie in his professional capacity." I attempted casualness with my light statement.

"I don't. Edward does." Jasper suddenly laughed.

"Really?" Angela asked and sounded as shocked as I was feeling.

"Um, yeah… It's possible that Tyler Crowley's parents wanted to press assault charges against me once." Edward muttered uncomfortably. "I might have lightly tapped Crowley on the nose when I caught him fucking my girlfriend at a party." He added quietly.

"Edward, you spread his nose to the other side of his face with that light tap." Jasper laughed.

I caught Edward's uneasy shrug when I turned to look at him and saw he was staring unhappily at his plate.

"I bet Charlie scared the living daylights out of you for a couple of hours. And then, when you were leaving the station, he would have patted you on the shoulder and called you Son." I guessed with a light tone.

I took a small bite from my sandwich and chewed slowly while I waited for Edward's response.

"He scared the living daylights out of me for an hour." Edward admitted. "And then he told me to use a punch to the kidneys the next time. He said it hurt more and would make the little prick piss blood for a week."

"That sounds like Charlie." I laughed.

"Did you actually end up getting charged with assault?" Angela asked quietly.

"No. I'm not sure what exactly happened but I think Crowley had been cautioned before for getting caught with weed. His parents might have been encouraged to let the assault charges drop with that hovering over their precious son." Edward muttered quietly.

"That sounds like Charlie." I repeated more seriously.

I started to eat my sandwich again and sensed Edward pick up his sub and continue eating after a long pause.

"You're Isabella Swan!" Alice gasped suddenly.

I nodded with my mouth full and frowned slightly as I took in her thunderstruck expression. I glanced around the table and saw that everyone was looking curiously at Alice.

"You were meant to start at Forks High halfway through my sophomore year." Alice explained. "Remember, Jazz?"

Jasper shrugged and then shook his head and kept eating his cheeseburger. Alice looked at him exasperatedly and then turned to Angela.

"You remember, don't you, Angela?" She asked quickly. "The whole school was talking about it." She added hurriedly.

Angela was frowning as she thought back and tried to remember and then smiled apologetically at Alice.

"I would have only paid attention if Bella was going to join the band, sorry Alice." Angela mumbled.

I finished my sandwich and smiled easily at Alice as she turned back to face me uncertainly.

"I was meant to start at Forks High… I was enrolled and had been given a class schedule and everything." I confirmed quietly.

"I knew it!" Alice said excitedly and clapped her hands together quickly. "I remember wondering what the Police Chief's daughter was going to be like… Whether you were going to be a rebel and hang out with the stoners or if you'd be a good girl." She explained rapidly.

"I was a good girl." I told her with a soft laugh.

"Oh." Alice said and seemed disappointed.

"Edward's head would have exploded." Emmett suddenly laughed. "Imagine Bella and Chelsea walking the halls of Forks High at the same time. He would have kept grabbing the wrong girl."

"Or maybe he would have grabbed the right girl and decided to keep her." Rosalie murmured quietly.

"Maybe." Edward said softly.

I flashed him a startled glance and met his intense gaze that didn't match his amused smile.

"What happened? Why didn't you move to Forks?" Alice asked abruptly and broke me free from Edward's eyes.

"Oh, um… Well, my mom married a baseball player and I was going to live with Charlie so she could travel with Phil. She was unhappy when he was on the road and she was left stuck in Phoenix with me…" I started. "Anyway, she caught him being unfaithful the week before I was going to move to Forks and kicked him out. And so, I stayed in Phoenix and finished out school there." I finished with a shrug.

"I, for one, am glad you didn't move to Forks. Angela would have been completely corrupted." Ben declared. "Bella was never a good girl. She was just quiet." He told Alice seriously.

"Ben!" I protested.

"It's always the quiet ones you have to watch." Jasper nodded seriously.

"Jasper!" I protested.

Everyone at the table laughed and I turned to Edward with a light laugh when he snaked his arm around my waist. I met his wicked, dancing eyes and couldn't catch my breath properly. I whipped my head around when I heard the tiny click of a shutter and caught Felix smiling down at his viewfinder.

"You'll want a copy of this shot, Bella." Felix laughed.

I stood up to move away from Edward's intoxicating presence and grabbed my camera off the table before I curiously walked to Felix's side. I agreed with Felix by nodding my head quickly when I saw his good photo of our table laughing and looking relaxed. I quickly found the shot I'd snapped off him and Demitri in the queue and showed it to Felix and then Demitri.

"I definitely want a copy of that one, Bella." Felix murmured.

"Can I see the shot of us all together, please?" Alice asked Felix politely from my side.

"Sure, little darlin'." Felix drawled.

"Oops, sorry! Guys, this is Felix and Demitri. Felix and Demitri this is Alice, Rosalie, Angela, Ben, Emmett and Jasper." I gestured as I introduced everyone who hadn't met.

Alice smiled as she looked at Felix's viewfinder and then stepped aside so Edward could look at the image. Felix quickly dropped his eyes away from Edward's sudden smile at him and I bit my lip to hold in my laugh. I smirked at Felix and then walked back over to my backpack hanging on Edward's seat and shrugged it on when I saw Angela and Rosalie getting ready to leave. I waved goodbye to Demitri and Felix and then waited beside Angela while everyone else stood up and shuffled around. I watched as Edward gave Felix a business card and kept talking with the two guys and Alice until Angela nudged me and I started walking with her and Rosalie towards the closest exit.

Rosalie groaned softly when Emmett peeled off with Ben and Jasper to stop and buy more food.

"Em!" She called to get his attention. "Angela, Bella and I will meet you guys in the Tropical Rain Forest."

Emmett waved to let us know that he'd heard Rosalie and then Rosalie tucked her hands through Angela's and my elbows and we hurried out towards our first planned stop on Rosalie's grand tour of the zoo. I chatted easily with Rosalie and Angela as we walked arm in arm through the zoo but then separated from them as we approached the first enclosure. I snapped a couple of quick photos of Angela and Rosalie smiling and chatting quietly together and then turned my camera towards the gorillas.

I was leaning on the fence and just watching the gorillas interact when I heard Alice's tinkling laughter getting closer. I turned and raised my camera and captured a perfect shot of Alice smiling up at Jasper with his arm around her shoulders as she walked in the middle of the guys along the path. I smiled at the viewfinder and then turned back to the enclosure as I rested my camera around my neck. I turned to move onto the next enclosure with Angela but stopped and waved Angela on when Edward caught my eye and raised the second drink container he was holding to show he'd bought it for me. I walked over to his side and accepted the fruit juice he passed me with a grateful smile and quiet thank you before I leaned on the enclosure's fence next to Edward.

I drank my juice and studied his profile as he looked at the gorillas with a soft smile and I marveled at how young and relaxed he looked. I copied him as he pushed off the fence and then we both turned to follow Angela's and Rosalie's direction towards the next enclosure. I threw my empty drink container into a trash bin as I passed it and then stepped back to Edward's side.

"I'll need your backpack again, Arizona." Edward murmured as he smiled down the path.

"I can carry it. It's not heavy." I said uncertainly.

Edward shrugged and turned his smile down at me and I looked at him for another second before I shrugged one arm out of my backpack's strap and turned so Edward could take my bag off my shoulder. He eased it gently off my back and then settled it onto his shoulder and smiled wider before he turned to look at what Alice was calling to his attention. I picked up my camera as he walked over to Alice and I took a photo of Edward looking up into a tree following Alice's pointed finger. I turned and captured a shot of Emmett, Jasper and Ben all walking behind me with their hands pushed into the pockets of their shorts. I quickly took another photo when they all looked up at me smiling before I turned back and jogged to catch up with Angela and Rosalie.

I spent the rest of the afternoon walking around the zoo laughing and chatting and intermittently taking photos of our group. I found myself walking next to Alice between Edward and Jasper for most of our journey through the exhibits while Ben and Angela walked next to Edward. Emmett and Rosalie seemed content to stay slightly separate from us as they held hands or walked with their arms wrapped around each other's waists.

"Have they always been like this?" I asked Alice quietly.

"Like what?" Alice asked hesitantly.

"So into each other that they're slightly apart from everyone else." I tried to explain what I meant inoffensively.

"Not for ages." Edward surprised me by answering softly. "I think this is their first day off together in years… since they opened the gym, at least."

"What about Sundays?" I asked. "I thought they didn't work Sundays at the gym."

"Rosalie usually does their bookwork on Sundays." Alice murmured. "And I think they're both so tired after the crazy hours they work that they both just crash."

"Oh." I mumbled.

"Today's been good for them." Alice smiled. "And for me! I can't believe the zoo has changed so much since I was last here."

"We should head back to the cars. The zoo closes soon." Jasper interrupted our quiet conversation.

He laughed softly at Alice's pout and quickly tucked her into his side with his arm around her shoulders. I stopped in the middle of the path and tried to work out where the west entrance would be relative to our position so I would know which direction I needed to take to catch my bus. Edward turned and stepped back to my side and gestured for me to follow Jasper and Alice.

"I'm driving you home, Arizona." He said quietly and seemed to have read my mind. "If you're lucky, I might even buy you dinner." He added laughingly.

"A lift would be good." I quickly accepted. "Dinner would have to be takeout eaten on my couch as you watched me work, sorry." I mumbled.

"Dinner can be takeout eaten on your couch as I work on my laptop and you edit your manuscript." Edward countered quickly.

"Okay." I accepted with a smile. "But I'll kick you out if you distract me." I warned him seriously.

"Deal." Edward agreed with a laugh.

"Thanks… for the lift." I offered belatedly. "Can I have my backpack please?" I asked quietly.

"Sure. What do you need?" He asked curiously as he handed me my bag.

"To enact part two of step two of Operation 'Still Needs a Cool Name'." I said lightly. "You go on ahead… I'll catch up."

I walked to the bench at the side of the path and pulled off one of my sandals and dug in my backpack. I looked up as Emmett stopped next to the bench and frowned down at my bare foot. I pushed my bottom lip out slightly and tried to look like a lost puppy dog.

"I've got blisters." I said sadly.

Emmett frowned down the path after Edward's retreating back and then looked at Rosalie with a worried expression. I caught Rosalie's eye and smiled quickly before Emmett turned back to face me and I resumed my pout. I showed Emmett my heel where I did actually have a blister from my new sandals.

"Can I have a piggy back ride, Emmett?" I asked in a tiny voice.

Emmett looked after Edward again and then frowned back down at my foot before he finally nodded. I quickly handed Rosalie my camera and then smiled gratefully when she also slung my backpack onto her shoulder. I quickly pulled off my other sandal with an unfeigned wince and stood up on the bench and waited for Emmett to turn away from me so I could climb onto his back. I tucked my sandals into my back pocket and then nimbly hopped up onto Emmett's back and rested my hands lightly on his shoulders.

"I'm not too heavy, am I, Emmett?" I asked quietly as he started walking after the others.

"No." Emmett's voice was abrupt and tense.

"Good." I breathed. "You're very strong." I murmured.

I saw Rosalie quickly turn her head away and hoped she wouldn't laugh at my attempt to distract Emmett. I saw that Edward had spotted my new mode of transport and was jogging back to us with Alice at his side. Jasper, Ben and Angela had stopped and were waiting for us in the middle of the path.

"Are you okay, Bella?" Alice asked as she and Edward stopped and then turned to walk next to Emmett.

"Blisters." Emmett answered for me.

"Alice, could you hold Bella's camera and backpack?" Rosalie asked suddenly. "Edward, my feet are killing me, can I have a piggy back ride?" She asked with a tiny pout.

"Baby doll, why didn't you tell me?" Emmett asked quietly.

"I was having too much fun to notice until Bella said something about her feet… And then mine started hurting." She pouted.

Emmett abruptly let go of my legs and I started falling down his back until Edward lunged to catch me and glared at his brother.

"Edward, you carry your girl and I'll carry my wife." Emmett ordered. "Alice, you carry the backpack and camera."

"Sure." Alice said as she accepted my camera and bag from Rosalie.

Emmett watched while Rosalie took off her own sandals and then held them in one hand before he turned and stood straight for Rosalie to try and jump onto his back. I tapped Edward's shoulder quickly and gestured for him to bend down so I could climb onto his back.

"Can you crouch down too, Em?" Rosalie asked with her pout audible in her voice.

I saw Emmett shift uneasily and clench his jaw before he crouched down for Rosalie to clamber onto his back. Rosalie wrapped her arms tightly around Emmett's neck and Emmett straightened cautiously before he started walking down the path. I carefully climbed onto Edward's back and then grabbed on tightly to his shoulders when he quickly straightened and jogged after Emmett. I noticed Rosalie whispering in his Emmett's ear and heard Emmett's soft chuckle and knew Emmett wasn't worrying about his bad knee.

"I'm sorry about this, Edward." I mumbled quietly.

"I'm sorry you got blisters to help my brother." He returned and I huffed a sheepish laugh.

"You're giving me too much credit, Edward. I was just silly enough to wear new sandals today… I should have worn my chucks." I confessed. "I was actually planning to race Emmett up stairs or something… This worked out okay, apart from my blisters."

Edward laughed and shifted my weight on his back so he could hook his elbows under my knees.

"I'm too heavy." I mumbled miserably.

"Please, Arizona." Edward scoffed. "I just didn't want to have to grab your ass if you started slipping."

I laughed softly and then buried my smile against Edward's neck when I saw that Alice had conned Jasper into giving her a ride on his back and they were walking back to meet us on the path. Edward looked up ahead of us and then dropped his head to hide his own smile.

"Maybe Ben's right… I haven't seen my sister this happy and relaxed in forever." Edward said softly.

"Ben always accuses me of being a bad influence but Angela's usually the one who instigates our mischief." I defended myself.

"Ben not so secretly loves your influence on Angela, Arizona. The fact that Angela gets into mischief at all is amazing to me, she's usually very serious and quiet." Edward murmured.

"It's always the quiet ones you have to watch." I jokingly repeated Jasper's drawled statement from lunch.

Edward laughed loudly and then pressed his elbows into his sides to squeeze my legs. He was silent for a beat in time and then I felt him puff out a silent laugh.

"You know, this isn't how I imagined the first time you'd have your legs wrapped around my waist." He murmured wickedly.

I guessed that Edward was teasing me and trying to make me blush and so I wrapped one arm down around his chest and moved my mouth next to his ear.

"Me neither." I breathed.

I felt Edward tense against my chest and fought back my triumphant smile as I thought how easy it was to tease him back. Edward laughed softly after a beat in time and stopped next to Emmett who had let down Rosalie and was holding her elbow while she slipped back into her sandals. I nodded quickly when Edward looked back questioningly over his shoulder and he released my legs and I carefully slid down his back until my feet touched the ground.

"Bathroom break, Bella?" Rosalie asked and pointed over to the toilet block.

I shook my head and then took my camera and backpack off Ben with a quiet thank you and then watched him walk with the three girls towards the toilets. Edward's phone rang in his pocket and he quickly pulled it out and checked the display before his face froze and he flashed a quick glance at me before he ended the call without answering. I looked away casually and smiled up at Emmett until I noticed Emmett's glum expression. Edward's phone rang again and I heard his exasperated sigh before he answered the call with a terse greeting. I stepped closer to Emmett and gently touched his elbow to get his attention.

"What's wrong, Emmett?" I asked quietly.

I desperately tried to tune out Edward on what I assumed was a booty call and concentrated on Emmett's small shrug. I followed Emmett's gaze over to the zoo shop next to the exit and smiled down at my feet as I guessed what Emmett was disappointed about.

"Do you want to get a t-shirt, Emmett?" I asked casually.

Emmett's sudden grin told me my guess was correct and I quickly ducked my head through my camera's neck strap and shrugged into my backpack before I darted towards the store without warning. I sped up as I heard Emmett's laugh and then the sound of him running behind me as I ran barefoot towards the door. Emmett easily overtook me and I slowed to a walk and matched his wide smile before we pushed into the shop. We immediately hurried to the racks of t-shirts and started flicking through the shirts on display.

"What colors do they have in your size, Bella?" Emmett asked over the top of his rack.

"Um… Pink, purple, white, blue, gray and beige." I muttered.

"Okay, I have white, blue, gray and black." Emmett said seriously. "What colors do they have in Rosie's size?" He asked quickly.

"Um… What size is she?" I hesitated.

"I don't know." Emmett admitted uneasily. "Bigger than you." He offered helpfully.

"Okay, I'll say a medium… So, we're getting matching colors?" I clarified because Ben had only been joking last night.

"Yep." Emmett confirmed quickly.

"Okay, there's white, blue and gray." I mumbled as I flicked through the medium sized t-shirts.

"What do they have in pixie size?" Emmett asked. "For Alice..." He tacked on needlessly.

"Okay, in extra-small they have… white and blue." I muttered.

"So, which should we get… white or blue?" Emmett asked uncertainly. "You look pretty in blue."

"Blue would bring out your eyes." I countered quickly and hid my smile behind the rack of t-shirts.

"Blue it is." Emmett decided happily.

I flicked through the t-shirts and pulled out one extra small, one small and two mediums in blue. I walked over to Emmett's rack to wait for him to finish pulling out his t-shirts and saw he'd grabbed an extra black one. We walked to the register and I passed Emmett two of my t-shirts and then held out my hand expectantly.

"I'm buying Angela's, Ben's and Edward's plus mine, of course." I said firmly.

Emmett hesitated and then slowly handed me two of his t-shirts and I smiled easily before I stepped up to pay for my four t-shirts. I glanced over my shoulder at Emmett and saw he was happily admiring his black t-shirt.

"Emmett, we have to wear our blue t-shirts out of the store and hide the bags so the others think they've missed out." I stage whispered loudly.

Emmett laughed and nodded quickly and then stepped up to pay for his t-shirts. I eased out of my backpack and lowered it to the floor next to my camera I took off from around my neck. I pulled my t-shirt out of the bag and pulled it on over the top of my tight fitting white t-shirt and then jokingly twirled in a circle for Emmett to admire. He gave me an approving nod and I pushed the bag with the other t-shirts carefully into my backpack. Emmett shocked me by pulling off his gray t-shirt first before he shrugged into his blue zoo t-shirt. He didn't notice my blush or the hungry stare of the cashier who was openly ogling him and casually handed me his bag to put into my backpack on top of my bag. I shrugged into my backpack and picked up my camera and then smiled glitteringly at Emmett before we walked towards the store's exit.

"Act cool, Bella. Pretend like nothing's different." Emmett planned in a whisper.

I nodded quickly as we stepped out of the shop and then nudged Emmett and rolled my eyes back at the door where the cashier had just locked up after us and turned around the closed sign. Emmett grinned evilly and then straightened his face and started to saunter too casually towards where the others were waiting.

I avoided Alice's and Angela's shocked faces and went to stand beside Jasper when I saw Edward was still on the phone. I smiled unhappily up at Jasper when he followed my gaze over to where Edward was staring off into the middle distance and listening intently to the person on the other end of the call.

"It's work… We had a team rolling out a patch for a client and it all went wrong." Jasper explained quietly. "The client has hit the roof and it's turned into a real shit-storm… If you had plans tonight with Edward then he's going to have to cancel." He added with a small frown.

I shrugged to hide my disappointment and then smiled sheepishly at Jasper.

"I thought it was a booty call." I confessed so no one else would hear.

"The first call was." He admitted. "He got rid of her quickly… Stefan called about the shit storm right after that." He added.

"Oh." I mumbled.

"You two bought everyone a t-shirt, didn't you?" Jasper asked quietly.

I smiled down at my feet and nodded slightly before I fought away my smile and looked over at Emmett who was standing with his hands in his pockets and was rocking on his feet and whistling nonchalantly. I coughed over my laugh and turned my back on Emmett studiously ignoring Alice's pout and Rosalie's suspicious gaze.

"Sorry, girls, they just closed the shop. We were their last customers." Emmett called.

I glanced over quickly and saw that Alice, Angela and Rosalie had started to hurry over to the zoo store to buy their own t-shirts. I bit my lip and looked at my bare feet to avoid seeing Alice's face when I saw her shoulders slump before she turned to walk back to Emmett.

"You don't play poker, do you, Bella?" Jasper laughed softly.

I shook my head slightly as I kept my eyes down and then pushed my hands into the front pockets of my shorts. Emmett waited until the three girls had walked dejectedly back to his side before he smiled slightly down at Alice's pout.

"It's a shame too. They had a really cool t-shirt with bears on it. I'll show you the one I got for myself." He teased with a perfectly straight face. "Bella, can I have my bag from the zoo shop, please?" He called over to me.

I nodded and slipped off my backpack and set it down with my camera and then crouched down to pull out Emmett's bag of t-shirts. I walked it over to him while avoiding Angela's steady gaze. I glanced back at Edward and saw that he was watching Emmett while he talked in short bursts and then paused to listen to the other caller. I looked back at Emmett as he opened his bag so Alice couldn't see what was inside.

"Okay, here we go." Emmett was muttering to himself while he peered into his bag. "Nope, it's not this one." He mumbled and handed a t-shirt to Alice.

Alice squealed and almost knocked Emmett over with the force of her hug before she quickly pulled her t-shirt on over her sundress. Emmett boomed out a laugh and handed Rosalie's t-shirt to her as he kissed her on the cheek. I trotted back over to my backpack and pulled out the t-shirts I'd bought and carried them back over to Angela. I laughed as Angela snatched the one I handed her and slipped it on over her tank top before she grabbed me in a bear hug. I walked her backwards over to where Ben was watching us and trying to hide his smile and handed him the smaller of the two t-shirts Emmett had selected. I then walked Angela backwards over to Edward and handed him the last t-shirt. I tried to pry Angela's arms from around my back but she was clinging too hard and I was laughing too much to get free.

"Ben? A little help?" I gasped through my laughter.

I tried to turn Angela back towards Ben but stumbled on her feet and made us both topple over. Angela landed mostly on me and we lay laughing helplessly on the ground with Angela still hugging me tightly. I squeaked when Alice came and lay over the top of Angela and laughed impossibly harder until I saw Emmett loom above us where we were tangled on the ground.

"Don't, Emmett!" I pleaded breathlessly.

He grinned down at me and then plucked Alice off Angela and passed her, still giggling, in to Jasper's arms. Emmett scooped up Angela and set her on her feet next to Ben and then reached his huge hand down to help me up off the ground. I gratefully accepted his help and pulled myself up before I brushed off my clothes and smoothed down my hair. I avoided looking at Angela and Alice so I didn't start laughing again and walked over to get my camera so I could take a picture of everyone in our matching t-shirts.

I walked back to Ben's side as I turned my camera back on and then grinned cheekily when he shook his head at me and plucked at the blue t-shirt he was wearing over his long sleeved shirt.

"Can you drop me off at my apartment, Ben? Edward was going to give me a lift but I don't think he can now." I asked quietly.

"Sure. It sounds like he has to go into the office directly from here." Ben agreed in a matching low voice.

I smiled my thanks and then took a picture of Edward talking on the phone. I glanced down at the viewfinder and then looked back at Edward as I heard him firmly end his call. He shoved his phone in his pocket and then tugged his snug black t-shirt over his head. My mouth dropped open as I stared openly at his strong, bare chest and ripped stomach muscles before I snapped my jaw shut and dropped my eyes to my camera. I felt myself start to blush and tried to distract myself by setting the timer on my camera. I looked around for somewhere suitable to prop the camera to take an automatic picture on delay and saw Felix and Demitri walking towards the exit. I waved frantically and caught Demitri's eye and he nudged Felix before they both walked over to where we were standing.

Felix smiled when I held my camera up and hurried to my side and took it out of my hands before he immediately started to examine it enviously. I stepped over to where Alice was orchestrating our positions for a perfect group photo and knew Felix would be taking many shots as we milled around. Alice ordered me to Edward's side and I shuffled around Emmett and took my place before I flashed a smile up at Edward. I met his frown briefly and then looked at Felix with my camera when he called out to Alice and started signaling how to line us up slightly better.

"Ben and Angela are driving me home." I murmured and hardly moved my lips.

"I was still going to do that." Edward muttered. "Sorry." He sighed heavily.

I smiled easily up into his frustrated expression and then looked at Felix as he stepped back to get us all in frame.

"Thanks for the t-shirt, Arizona." Edward murmured and I could now hear a smile in his voice.

I smiled and nodded and then puffed out my breath silently when Edward slipped his arm around my waist. I leaned against his side and imagined I felt his lips brush against my hair.

"Say 'sex'!" Felix called cheekily.

I laughed when Emmett boomed it back at Felix and earned us a disapproving look from an older lady near the exit. Edward laughed softly when we both heard Rosalie scolding Emmett.

"Say 'I want it'." Felix called with a laugh.

"You want it." Emmett, Jasper and Edward chorused back loudly.

We all laughed and then Alice skipped over to check Felix's shots on my camera. I saw Ben checking his watch and reluctantly stepped away from Edward and walked over to my backpack. I pulled out my camera case and zipped my backpack closed and shrugged it on before I stepped over to Alice with my camera. I accepted my camera back and tucked it carefully into its case before I hung the case over my shoulder.

"I'll put all our shots up on a photo-sharing site with a password." I assured Alice.

"I'll need that password, Bella." Rosalie murmured on Alice's other side.

I nodded quickly and then waved goodbye to Felix and Demitri before I stepped forward to hug Alice and Rosalie goodbye. I solemnly accepted my Sun Devils baseball cap back off Emmett and then froze when he swept me up in a hug before I laughed breathlessly when he lifted me easily off the ground.

"Thanks for a perfect afternoon, Bella." He murmured next to my ear.

"It was all you, Emmett." I mumbled. "I was just the catalyst because of my photography class."

"Thank you for being the catalyst for a perfect afternoon." He quickly responded.

"You're welcome. Now put me down, you're creasing my t-shirt." I pretended to grouch.

Emmett laughed and carefully set me back down on my feet. I grinned up at him and then spun to join Ben and Angela so they could leave and bumped right into Jasper's chest. I froze again when Jasper hugged me quickly but smiled up into his calm, relaxed face as he straightened. I exaggeratedly checked around me before I turned again to walk over to Angela and grinned at Jasper over my shoulder when I heard his soft laugh. I smiled briefly up at Edward as I stopped between him and Angela before I held up one finger to ask for a minute at Ben's questioning look. I turned to say goodbye to Edward and felt suddenly shy.

"I'll walk you to Ben's car." He murmured.

I smiled and nodded and then gestured for Ben to lead the way out of the zoo. Edward walked next to me as we followed Angela and Ben towards their car and I looked at him when I felt his gaze on my profile.

"What did Emmett say just now?" Edward asked quietly.

"He said he'd had a perfect afternoon." I smiled.

"It has been great." Edward murmured. "I don't want it to end, now." He added softly.

"It's been fun…" I agreed lightly. "Beautiful weather, good company, laughter, cheesy matching t-shirts." I listed happily.

"Good weather, beautiful company, laughter, cool matching t-shirts." Edward corrected and clasped my hand in his warm palm.

I huffed a soft laugh at his smooth line and smiled up into his eyes before I tore my eyes away to watch the ground under my bare feet. I smiled down at the ground when Edward gently squeezed my fingers and I happily wondered how something as simple as holding Edward's hand could seem so right and so natural.

"You know, that was one of the hardest phone calls I've ever had to take." Edward murmured. "I had a complete asshole berating me like the sky has just fallen down and I kept wanting to crack up watching you and Emmett… Both of you are appalling actors… And then I almost swore when you hit the ground under Angela."

"Has the sky fallen down?" I asked quietly.

"I don't think so… That's why I have to go in, though. I think we can salvage it tonight." He shrugged.

He sighed unhappily and I looked up and saw Ben unlocking remotely his car with his key fob. Edward squeezed my fingers again and then released my hand before he raked his hand through his hair.

"Tonight was going to be really good." He told me quietly.

"Takeout on my couch?" I asked uncertainly.

"Making out on your couch like teenagers." Edward corrected me wickedly as he waved goodbye to Angela with a smile.

"Like it would have stayed on the couch." I scoffed quietly.

I smiled prettily up into Edward's frozen face and then laughed as I dodged away from his hands as he tried to grab me back to his side. I waved cheekily as I hurried around Ben's car to the passenger side and then quickly climbed into the backseat behind Angela. I sighed as Ben started the car and suddenly felt tired and drained after the long day on my feet. I smiled genuinely at Edward and lifted my hand to properly wave goodbye as Ben pulled out of his parking spot and accelerated slowly away.

"Care to share anything, Bella?" Angela asked teasingly from the front seat.

"Not in front of Ben, thanks Angela." I declined lightly.

Angela laughed delightedly and Ben flashed me a quick smile over his shoulder before he turned back to concentrate on turning out of the zoo's parking lot. I rested my head back against my seat and wondered if I would see Edward tomorrow or if I'd have to wait until Monday night at the gym before I'd see him again.


	16. Chapter 16

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

My Monday dragged by even though I was busy responding to the flurry of emails from our Clients from Hell and interviewing candidates for the developer and web designer roles we had to fill to cope with our heavy workload. The highlight of my morning was when Felix, from Bella's zoo photography course, came in for his interview for a web designer position. He had submitted his resume and been selected for an interview before we had met on Saturday. I'd given him my business card so he could email me his photo of me and Bella at lunch and he had mentioned that he was interviewing for one of the senior positions we had to fill. Alice had excused herself from his interview because she thought she would be unfairly biased in his favor and so I sat in with Alice's second in command who drilled him mercilessly for the whole interview. We had both been impressed by his knowledge, experience and composure under pressure and had easily decided to offer him the role.

By half past five I was fed up with work and just wanted to leave so I could get to the gym and meet Bella. We had exchanged text messages throughout the day yesterday but had both been busy trying to complete our urgent work and hadn't met up. I'd spent a lonely and frustrating day working on the project schedule and requirements for the new program of work for our Clients from Hell and hadn't finalized my documentation until the early hours of this morning.

I spent another fifteen minutes prioritizing my work for the next day and then shut down and packed up my laptop. I picked up my gym bag as I hurried out of my office and swung it onto my shoulder with my laptop before I locked my office door and hurried to the elevator. I impatiently waited for the lift and then rode it down to the ground floor before I rapidly pushed out onto the street and dodged and weaved through the slow moving pedestrian traffic all the way to the gym. I darted into Pump but slowed to a saunter when I saw Bella behind the counter with Rosalie and Emmett at one of their computer monitors.

I curiously looked at their screen as I accepted a locker key from Jessica and saw they were looking at photos from our afternoon at the zoo. Emmett distractedly looked up and smiled at me before Rosalie nudged him to get him to look at the next shot off him, Jasper and Ben smiling at the camera as they walked side by side with their hands pushed into their pockets. I hurried into the locker room to change and pushed back out into the reception area dressed in my light sweat pants and a wifebeater.

I reluctantly walked back to the counter and leaned against it until I started to find Jessica's simpering and preening annoying.

"Em!" I called quietly.

"Patience, bro." Emmett muttered without looking away from the screen. "What are we doing tonight?"

"Legs and lower body?" I suggested casually.

"Okay." Emmett muttered and then grinned at Rosalie when Bella brought up the next shot of him and Rosalie cuddling.

"Em!" I said louder.

"Okay!" He sighed exasperatedly. "I'm coming… Thanks, Bella, some of these are really great."

"It's cool." Bella mumbled. "Oh, hey… can I work out with you guys tonight? I can't run because of my blisters." She said distractedly to the screen.

"We're lifting weights." Emmett replied doubtfully.

"I kinda figured that, Emmett, when Edward said you were doing a legs and lower body workout." Bella said as if Emmett was slow. "I can keep up with anything you guys can do." She added with a glittering smile at Emmett as she stood up.

"I'm cool with it if Edward doesn't mind." Emmett shrugged as he walked out from behind the counter.

"Emmett won't take it easy on you." I hesitated.

"Oh, please." Bella scoffed. "Emmett can't be harder than my trainer in Phoenix." She smirked down at her iPod she had picked up from the counter.

I flashed her my best challenging, crooked grin and then smiled at Emmett but he was frowning at Bella as she ignored us to scroll through her playlists. She turned to Rosalie and passed her the iPod before she followed Emmett out from behind the counter. I tried not to be too obvious as I ogled at her in her tiny tank top that she was wearing over a sports bra and her black, stretchy shorts that made her legs look endless and her ass look incredible. I focused on her bruises I could see fading and turning yellow rather than her soft curves and smooth skin to distract myself from getting aroused.

"Can you pipe that through into the weight room only?" She asked Rosalie and gestured to her iPod. "I want to show these boys how you're meant to work out." She said with a wide smile.

"I can do that, Bella." Rosalie said quietly. "I'll put it on after your warm up."

"Cool." Bella smirked. "Are you guys ready to sweat?" She asked and turned to include me and Emmett in her challenge.

I moved to stand next to Emmett without answering and then copied Emmett's sharp nod. Bella rolled her eyes as she stepped lightly to Emmett's other side and in that moment wasn't at all likeable. We strode quickly into the exercise room and moved to the mats to start our warm up stretching in silence with the heavy, anticipatory tension between us building slowly. Emmett and I followed our usual warm up routine and Bella silently copied our stretches and exercises with a smug look on her face that I could see was annoying Emmett. He sprang up from his last push-up and waited for me and Bella to stand before he turned in silence and jogged into the weight room.

"Um, Emmett?" Bella called with a laugh in her voice. "I think you're forgetting something."

Emmett turned back to Bella with an exasperated look and waited for her to explain what she thought he'd overlooked. Bella stood in front of him with her arms crossed over her chest and waited imperiously for him to realize what he'd overlooked. I watched Emmett worriedly when I thought I saw a spark of anger flash in his eyes.

"What have I forgotten?" He bit out quietly and I knew he was angry.

"Your brace." Bella smirked. "You owe me a brace." She laughed and gestured impatiently for him to hand it over.

"I need my knee brace for weights." Emmett ground out harshly.

I noticed that the two guys who had been in the weight room before us had finished working out and were avidly watching the standoff between Bella and Emmett. I turned to stare at them and they both quickly averted their eyes and wiped down their equipment before walking out into the exercise room. Rosalie started to close the doors across the arches into the exercise room behind them and shut us in to our own private workout room.

"Who said you need your knee brace for weights, Emmett?" Bella asked curiously in a sweet voice. "Did your physio or surgeon tell you that? Or, was it the scared little boy in your head that told you that?" She was sneering when she finished.

Emmett took one step towards Bella and I quickly moved to intercept him but Bella waved me away.

"No, Edward, I need to hear who told Emmett that he needs his brace to do any part of his job." She said sharply. "Your physio knows you're a personal trainer, right, Emmett? Did he tell you that you needed to avoid doing anything unless you had your brace on? Did he say that you couldn't do one single thing in this gym because of your knee?" She bit out her questions rapidly.

She unfolded her arms from across her chest and braced her hands on her hips and then took two steps towards Emmett.

"Or, did your physio say that your knee was good? Did he tell you that it was probably stronger than your right knee?" She sneered.

Bella spun away from Emmett and muttered something under her breath as she walked over to the closest leg extension machine. I ran a hand through my hair as I worried that Bella was pushing Emmett too far when he wasn't mentally ready to start working out without his brace.

"What did you just say?" Emmett ground out angrily.

Bella glanced over her shoulder and then turned back to her machine and roughly pulled out the pin setting the weight for the machine.

"I said you need to fucking grow a set and man the fuck up." She spat out as she slapped the pin into a new slot.

"Bella, back off." I muttered. "He's not ready…" I said unhappily while I desperately wished that Emmett could find this easier.

Bella spun back around and smiled glitteringly as she turned her hard stare on me and then shrugged.

"That's fine then. Keep your fucking brace on, Emmett." She bit out at Emmett. "Are we going to work out? Or, are we going to stand around and talk about our fears and insecurities?" She muttered and rolled her eyes.

Emmett glared at her and then jerkily bent down and ripped open the Velcro straps of his brace before he tore off the brace and threw it across the room. He pointed to different sets of machines and numbered them in turn and then moved to the furthest leg extension machine from Bella's.

"First circuit, we do two sets of twelve repetitions with thirty second rests between sets." He ground out between his clenched teeth. "Second and last circuit, we do one set of fourteen reps… just to feel the burn." He smiled falsely at Bella.

I unhappily moved to the leg extension machine next to Emmett so I could keep an eye on his knee and adjusted the weight selected just as Bella's playlist started pounding through the speakers. The music was loud and angry and perfectly suited our mood as we quickly settled onto our machines and followed Emmett's tempo as he smoothly worked through our first set of leg extensions. I anxiously watched Bella through our second set and saw that she started to struggle on the seventh rep but kept her form and Emmett's merciless tempo for the full twelve reps.

We quickly moved onto the leg curl machines and selected our weights before Emmett barely glanced at Bella to check that she was ready and then started our first set of curls. I listened to the song playing as I rested between our sets and laughed weakly when I realized it was 'Big Man with a Big Gun' by Nine Inch Nails.

"You're going to kill me with your playlists, Arizona." I said loudly over the music. "What's a nice girl like you doing with a song like this?"

"Getting loud, Edward." She called back without turning her head to look at me.

"Second set." Emmett interrupted us loudly. "One… Two… Three…" He counted aloud to set our tempo.

I concentrated on keeping my body strong as I worked my hamstrings and breathed evenly through the set. I heard the weights on Bella's machine return heavily on our last two reps and looked over at her as we moved to the leg press machines. She avoided my eyes as she walked quickly to a machine and then concentrated on changing the selected weight. She settled herself ready to start and then looked over at Emmett for his cue to begin. I forced myself to focus on pushing up my weights with good form but found myself listening to the steady clang of Bella's machine that got rougher as she again tired in the second set.

We worked through two sets on the seated calf press, adductor, hack squat and abductor machines before we ended back at the leg extension machines to start our punishing last circuit around the machines. Rosalie opened one door from the exercise room and walked in with two guys in their early twenties who moved to the lat pull down machines. Rosalie brought over three bottles of water for us and then walked over and picked up Emmett's knee brace before she left but kept the door open.

"I hope you guys like Nine Inch Nails." Bella smiled over at the two young guys.

"Yeah, they're cool." One of the guys grinned back.

Bella quickly drank some water and recapped her bottle before she climbed onto her leg extension machine and waited for me and Emmett to finish our break. Rosalie jogged back into the weight room and smiled over at me and Emmett before she quickly moved to the machine next to Bella and adjusted the weights. She gracefully swung her leg over the bench seat and started to chat with Bella while they both waited for me and Emmett to get ready. I nodded at Emmett's questioning look and moved to my machine and then gritted my teeth through the fourteen repetitions that Emmett was using solely as a torture method.

Rosalie worked around the machines with us as we quickly pushed through our final set and I was breathing hard when we finished. Rosalie and Bella both flicked waves at the two young guys who quickly dropped their eyes away when Emmett and I looked over at them and I frowned after Bella as she skipped out of the weight room behind Rosalie.

Both girls were waiting for us on the mats and I dropped down heavily and ignored Rosalie's amused smile. I glanced at Bella and thought that she looked physically tired and mentally on edge. She was sweaty and disheveled and I could read her strain in the tension around her eyes and mouth. The hair that had worked free from her ponytail was damply plastered to her forehead and neck and her chest, arms and face looked flushed and overheated. Her tank top was dark with sweat and her limbs were slick and glistening under the gym's lights.

Bella smirked when she caught me looking her over and I frowned when I realized she thought I was perving on her and not checking that she was okay after our grueling workout. I looked up at Emmett as he slowly lowered himself to the mats and caught his own frown at Bella.

"One hundred crunches." Emmett bit out.

"Emmett, no!" I protested. "Fifty crunches." I countered.

"Whatever." Emmett muttered and sounded like a petulant teenager.

He rolled onto his back and Bella quickly copied him but kept talking to Rosalie who was sitting with her arms wrapped around her knees. I started matching Emmett's rapid crunches and had to concentrate hard to keep breathing correctly.

"And… she'd… clear… the… gym… and… have… us… run… from… one… end… to… the… other… between… sets." Bella kept chatting with Rosalie around her sit ups.

"Twenty." Rosalie told us how many crunches we'd done.

"Her… worst… work… outs… were… when… she'd… go… militant… on… us…" Bella continued. "She… called… them… boot… up… your… ass… camp… workouts…" She puffed out a laugh.

"Forty." Rosalie kept count.

"Burpies… planks… press-ups… squats… lunges… pull-ups… crunches… too… many… crunches." Bella panted.

"Fifty." Rosalie murmured.

I collapsed back onto the mats and lay breathing heavily but sat up quickly when Bella and Emmett kept doing crunches.

"All… while… running… up… and… down… that… fucking… huge… gym…" Bella's voice was strained.

"Sixty." Rosalie counted softly.

"Start… stretching… Edward…" Emmett ordered quietly as he maintained his rapid tempo.

"If… Leah… didn't… make… one… person… cry… in… a… workout…" Bella kept talking around her crunches.

"Seventy." Rosalie measured.

"She'd… feel… cheated…" Bella puffed out a laugh. "And… you… never… told… her… you… wanted…"

"Eighty." Rosalie murmured.

"To… fit… into… a… bikini… She'd… take… over… your… diet…" Bella puffed.

"Ninety." Rosalie counted quietly.

"She… wouldn't… let… you… even… smell… a… pizza… or… chocolate." Bella panted.

"One hundred." Rosalie said softly and sounded triumphant.

Bella lay back on the mats and breathed deeply for a count of five seconds and then rolled onto her stomach and pushed herself up onto her elbows and straightened her body off the mat. I knew how much the plank position she was holding on her elbows and toes hurt and watched her out of the corner of my eye as I bent forward to stretch my hamstrings and lower back. I counted slowly to thirty in my head before Bella lowered herself back onto the mat and sat up to start stretching through her cool down.

Rosalie stood up and walked over to help two women on the new treadmills and Emmett, Bella and I kept stretching in silence. My body felt heavy and loose when I sat up from my last stretch but my mind was accelerating as I started to worry about Bella's unexpected bitchiness towards Emmett. Before tonight I would have said she was acting completely out of character but now I wondered if she had only been hiding this hard, cruel side of her personality.

I sat cross legged on the mats to wait for Emmett to finish cooling down and stared at my hands to avoid looking at Bella. I sensed her standing up after a long five minutes and felt her eyes on me but didn't look up to meet her gaze.

"Thanks for the workout, guys." She said quietly. "My blisters should be good on Wednesday and so I'll be back on the treadmill…"

She waited for a beat in time but neither Emmett nor I said anything and I kept my head bent down.

"Okay, um, I've got to get my iPod from Rosalie… See you guys around." She mumbled.

I saw her feet in her trainers turn and step away and swallowed sickly against the knot of fear and growing anger that I felt towards this hidden bitchy Bella. Emmett kept his head bent towards his knees as he stretched out his hamstrings as she walked over to Rosalie and waved her hand towards the sound system at the front of the gym. I watched Rosalie and Bella walk up to get Bella's iPod but looked away when Rosalie frowned back towards Emmett and me on the mats.

Emmett pushed himself upright and then gestured out of the exercise room towards the change rooms in a silent question. I nodded and stood up quickly and walked towards the doors at his side. I glanced over at Rosalie and Bella and saw they were talking together at the sound system. I flicked an uneasy look at Emmett's blank expression as we pushed out into the lobby in silence and wondered if his knee was hurting. I followed him into the change room as I watched his stride and couldn't see that he was favoring his left leg or moving any differently to normal and decided he was still worked up over his confrontation with Bella.

I stripped and showered quickly before I toweled off and walked slowly back to my locker with my towel around my neck. I glanced at Emmett sitting in front of his open locker in just his boxers and wondered what I could say to break our heavy silence.

"Edward, cover it up." He muttered. "You know us Cullen boys can't flash our junk around without making other guys feel inadequate."

I laughed and flashed him a smug grin before I rummaged in my gym bag for my jeans and pulled them straight on to walk home commando.

"Nah, it's alright, Em." I returned lightly. "Their women will tell them it's not the size that matters but what they do with it."

Emmett scoffed a laugh and I snickered cockily before I started to towel my hair dry. I shrugged into my long sleeved t-shirt and then sat down on the bench to pull on clean socks and my trainers. Emmett stood up to pull on his jeans and I flicked a glance up at him and saw he hadn't put on a knee brace before I dropped my head to concentrate on tying my laces.

"Who was that bitch and what has she done with our Bella?" Emmett suddenly demanded too loudly.

"I don't know, Em. I was just asking myself the same thing." I muttered as I bent down to pick up my sweaty clothes.

I rolled my workout clothes up in my wet towel and then stuffed them into my bag with my shower gel, deodorant and street shoes. I carefully folded my suit jacket inside out and tucked it and my matching trousers into the other compartment to hang up when I got home. I cast around to check if I'd missed packing anything and then grabbed my laptop out of my locker and hefted it onto my shoulder with my gym bag. Emmett slammed his locker shut and pocketed his wallet and keys and then stopped at my side near the door. I suddenly didn't want to go out into the lobby in case Bella was waiting to walk home with me because I didn't think I could hold myself together if she was still acting like the stranger who had worked out with me and Emmett.

I shrugged unhappily at Emmett's questioning look and then followed him as he pushed out into the lobby. We both froze when we saw Bella at the wall of gig posters and bills advertising album launches but for two very different reasons.

"Get the fuck away from my posters." Emmett growled at Bella and wasn't feigning the anger in his voice.

I saw Bella freeze for a second and then continue rolling up her prank poster that she had taken down into a tight tube.

"Rosalie said I could have this one." Bella replied quietly and shrugged without turning around.

Emmett turned sharply to Rosalie who was dressed to go home and leaning against the front desk talking with Jessica. Rosalie nodded abruptly and then turned away to watch Bella's back as she stooped down to pick up her gym bag and messenger bag.

"See you guys around." Bella called as she started out towards the street without looking back. "Bye, Rosalie."

I frowned at her repetition of her strange goodbye and watched her as she paused for the automatic doors and then strode out and turned towards our apartments without looking at me once. I glanced at Rosalie as she pushed off the reception desk and then stormed around behind it before she bent down and straightened with a spray bottle of disinfectant and roll of paper towel. She slapped the wipes and disinfectant on the counter and glared at Emmett.

"You, my darling husband, can go and clean the machines that you left sweaty and disgusting." She snapped. "And, you, my darling brother-in-law, can help me forward on Bella's email with the link to our zoo photos to your email address."

She abruptly flicked her hand at the monitor where she and Emmett had been looking over Bella's shoulder at the photos before our workout. She turned to Jessica and murmured something I couldn't hear before Jessica nodded once and quickly slipped out from behind the desk and walked towards the elevator past the exercise room. Emmett stomped over to the counter and snatched up the disinfectant and paper towels and then stormed after Jessica but peeled off to go into the weight room.

I looked uncertainly at Rosalie but she was ignoring me to flick through some new completed application forms. I stepped behind the counter and then placed my bags on the floor before I sat down at the monitor and maximized Rosalie's email application. I forwarded the email on to my personal and work addresses and then sent it to Ben's, Jasper's and Alice's work emails as an afterthought.

"Bella said she told you she was going to play bad cop with Emmett tonight." Rosalie murmured behind me quietly.

I swiveled in my chair and looked at her carefully before I shrugged uneasily and turned back to the computer monitor.

"No one plays it that well, Rosalie… That was coming from somewhere… She was a complete bitch to him… She targeted his weaknesses and played on them." I muttered at the screen.

"It did come from somewhere, Edward. She told me she was channeling that trainer she was telling me about when she was doing her crunches." Rosalie murmured. "It was all an act."

"She is not that good an actress, Rosalie." I disputed exasperatedly as I spun in the chair to face her.

"No, she's not." Rosalie agreed. "But you were so caught up worrying about your brat of a brother and then concentrating on your workout that you weren't watching Bella as closely as you normally do." She added quietly.

I raked a hand through my damp hair and frowned at Rosalie as she met my gaze calmly and steadily.

"Emmett wasn't being a brat." I defended my brother. "Bella was rude and bitchy."

"Did Emmett ask Bella any questions to make sure that she could safely complete that workout? Did he ask when she'd last worked out with weights? Did he even watch over her to make sure she was lifting correctly or hadn't selected too much weight?" Rosalie listed the things I sickly realized Emmett should have done and let me glimpse her simmering temper.

I shrugged uncomfortably and met her sharp gaze briefly before I dropped my eyes.

"Emmett was acting like a scared man who was covering up his fear with anger." Rosalie sighed. "Do you know that Bella asked me how often Emmett takes the stairs here even with his brace on? Do you know I had to tell her never? He always waits to take the lift and I'd never even thought twice about it… It's no way to live, Edward, always limiting yourself because of an old fear… It weakens you and makes you doubt yourself." She added quietly and I wondered if she was talking obliquely about more than Emmett and his knee.

"So she was prepared to risk losing Emmett as a friend, by acting like that, just to help him?" I asked disbelievingly and held onto my own old fear. "She was prepared to risk losing me as more than a friend to help him?" I muttered down at the ground.

"Maybe she hoped that Emmett would forgive her… Maybe she hoped her warning to you that you might hate her for upsetting your brother was enough that you would trust her and understand that she was trying to help Em…" Rosalie replied softly.

I raked a hand through my hair angrily when I realized that Bella had shared a lot of what she'd told me on Friday night with Rosalie.

"What else did she tell you?" I muttered hotly.

"That Emmett might have to see a sports psychologist if he puts his brace back on… She said she can't play bad cop again." Rosalie almost whispered. "She said she was sorry for upsetting Emmett… She said maybe you were right and he's not ready."

Rosalie's sad voice cooled my hot temper and I rubbed my face with my hand when I suddenly felt tired and overwhelmed.

"I wouldn't have let her do that in front of you if she'd told me what she was planning." Rosalie added softly. "I would have played a great good cop… You sucked. You immediately forgot the plan and switched back into the fierce Cullen brother and shut down on her… She had to win that pissing contest, Edward, or Em would have dismissed everything she's been telling him about his knee. She was really hurting…" She finished quietly and I could read her worry in her face.

"She finished with a fucking plank position and held it for thirty seconds, Rosalie." I disputed quickly. "She wasn't hurting."

"She had to win." Rosalie shrugged.

I tore my eyes away from her steady gaze when I heard Emmett's booming laughter as he pushed out from the exercise room. I stood up abruptly and grabbed my laptop and gym bag and stepped out from behind the reception desk. I had to process everything that Rosalie had said and what had happened between Bella and Emmett tonight. I felt edgy and unsettled and didn't know what to believe about the brittle, cruel and obnoxious woman who had pushed Emmett tonight and hidden any sign of weakness or pain that Rosalie had said she was feeling.

I flicked a wave at Emmett and then turned to Rosalie cautiously and was surprised when she waved goodbye without lifting her eyes from the application forms she was again flicking through. I frowned at her for a moment and then walked slowly out on the street and turned for home with heavy feet and a heavier heart.


	17. Chapter 17

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

By five o'clock I knew I wouldn't be able to walk down to the gym with Ben, Jasper and Alice to watch Ben's squash game or see Bella before her and Alice's yoga class. My day had turned to shit when we'd received a second harassment complaint against the same senior developer and I'd spent the morning and most of the afternoon dealing with the aftermath of his dismissal and rapid escort from the building. I strode out of my office and over to Alice's desk and then paused until she could finish up with Ben who was sitting at her desk looking at her monitor. Alice looked up and smiled when she saw me hesitating.

"Edward, Ben and I were just comparing our favorite shots from the zoo." Alice chirped.

"Definitely the second shot in the matching t-shirts that Felix took." I quickly contributed one of my favorites.

I had spent the evening after I'd gotten home from the gym slowly working my way through all of the photos that Bella had posted of our afternoon at the zoo. I had alternately laughed, smiled gently and then almost wept when I'd seen some of the candid shots that Bella had snapped when we'd been unaware of her camera. One shot of Rosalie and Emmett had captured all of their strong, binding love that had kept them together since they were high school sweethearts as they laughed into each other's eyes. Another shot had caught Jasper smiling softly down at Alice as she smiled at the zebras and I no longer doubted that Jasper would always adore and cherish my sister after seeing the love in his eyes that Bella had captured.

I'd ordered takeout and then started going back through the photos from the start as I thought about the woman who could see us so clearly that she had easily recorded the ties of love, family and friendship that bound us together and made us strong. I contrasted the Bella who had taken the photos to the bitchy Bella at the gym and had accepted, in my head, Rosalie's reassurance that bitchy Bella was just an act.

My subconscious, though, had not accepted Rosalie's reassurances and I had been plagued with my sex dreams that shifted into night terrors when Bella morphed into Chelsea. I'd repeatedly surfaced from my dreams before immediately sinking back into my next hot encounter with my nocturnal Bella until my alarm had finally rescued me and jarred me fully awake.

"Edward?" Alice's sharp voice intruded into my distracted daydreaming.

"Sorry?" I mumbled and looked into her exasperated expression.

"Nevermind!" She huffed. "Are you going to be ready to leave at five-thirty?" She asked.

"Um, that's why I came over, actually. I have to meet with Stefan about Saturday's fuck up and how we can avoid it next time. I'll head down for the end of Jasper's game just after seven." I told Alice and Ben resignedly. "Today's developments pushed my whole day out."

"Yeah." Ben muttered angrily. "I've spent the whole day putting out fires too."

"I need my yoga class tonight." Alice sighed. "It's been a shit day." She agreed with our assessments of our work days.

"I'll see you when your yoga class gets out, Alice." I said as a temporary farewell. "I'll see you watching Jasper whip his opponent while you wait for your wife to get out of her yoga class." I pointed my finger in a gun at Ben.

I spun back to my office as I saw Stefan and one of his developers walking towards me with their heads bent over a ream of reports. I met them in the passageway and waved them in to my office before I closed the door behind us and shut out all interruptions. We worked through the factors that had contributed to the disaster that ruined my Saturday night with Bella and then started brainstorming how to mitigate the risks of them occurring again. I glanced at my laptop when we were finished and swore aloud when I saw it was twenty minutes to eight and I was already ten minutes late for my squash game.

I waved Stefan and his deputy out of my office and then grabbed up my phone and called Ben. I started shutting down my laptop and shuffling all of the reports sitting on my desk into a drawer while I anxiously waited for him to answer his phone.

"Edward." Ben greeted me shortly.

"Ben, I'm just packing up now. Can you stall my game for another say… ten… no, fifteen, minutes?" I spoke rapidly.

"Yeah. It's just that Jasper's game finished early and so they've already been waiting twenty minutes for you… Look, I'll see what I can do but hurry down here, okay" He mumbled.

"Okay. See you soon." I muttered as I snagged up my gym bag and squash kit and strode out of my office.

I swung my office door shut behind me and ran to the elevators and then impatiently stabbed the call button until the lift arrived. I stepped in and bounced on my toes all the way to the ground floor until I squeezed out of the barely opened doors and ran out to the street. I sprinted all the way to the gym and almost knocked over Ben, Angela and Bella as they stepped through the automatic doors on their way out.

I skidded to a halt and stood gasping for breath while I looked at Bella and waited for her to meet my eyes. She kept her eyes trained on the ground and I flicked my eyes over her and saw she was dressed in sweats and was carrying her usual gym bag and messenger bag but had a gray garment bag folded over her forearm.

"Edward, you have, um… three minutes before you forfeit." Ben warned me. "You better get up there."

"Fuck! Okay, see you tomorrow." I said to both Ben and Bella as I started walking backwards into the gym.

I spun around and sprinted for the stairs up to the courts as I decided to get changed outside the court so they couldn't disqualify me while I was in the change rooms. I started pulling off my tie and undoing my shirt as I bounded up the stairs and skidded into the hallway between the squash courts and aerobics and yoga studios. Alice moved to my side as I dropped my bags on the ground outside my court and pulled out my polo shirt and shorts as I started stripping. I pulled on each piece of clothing she handed me and then grabbed out my racquet and safety glasses as Alice tied my laces.

I dashed onto the court and smiled crookedly at the female umpire who flashed a quick smile at me before she turned to my opponent and signaled for him to start our warm up. I fiercely pushed all my stress from my horrendous, long day away and blocked out all of my confusion about Bella's subdued and withdrawn behaviour tonight as I focused on my opponent. I'd played him twice before and knew I could beat him easily if I concentrated on the game.

I won the game in two quick sets and shook my opponents hand and then followed him off the court to where Alice and Jasper were minding my gym bag and squash kit. I grinned widely at Jasper but he only returned my victorious smile with a quick lift of the corner of his mouth before he looked away. I ran my hand through my hair as I wondered what was bugging him and tried to think back to what I had done to piss off the usually unflappable Jasper Hale.

"Edward! Guess what?" Alice was brimming with high spirits.

I smoothed away my frown and smiled down at my little sister.

"What?" I gasped back teasingly.

"Tanya had me lead most of the class." She bubbled proudly. "I had to take my mat up to the front and hold the positions that Tanya called out."

"Well done." I smiled and then tousled her hair. "Why? Was Tanya helping the others?" I asked to learn more about my sister's huge achievement.

"Nup… She was massaging Bella's legs." Alice said and was more subdued. "Bella couldn't move into most of the positions… Tanya offered her a deep tissue massage when Bella said she'd overdone it in the gym last night."

"Fuck." I muttered under my breath.

"I think Bella was trying not to cry at one point." Alice added quietly and looked up unhappily when Rosalie walked over.

"Alice, we were just going to keep that to ourselves." Rosalie murmured.

"Sorry, I forgot." Alice said down to her feet.

I followed Rosalie's gaze as she looked down the wide hallway to where Emmett was talking with two of the referees. I saw Emmett was wearing sweat pants instead of his usual uniform of shorts and looked back sharply at Rosalie.

"Is he wearing his knee brace?" I asked softly.

"No." Rosalie replied shortly and didn't look at me when she answered.

"So, Bella is hurting today?" I returned to Alice's unguarded sharing of their secret.

"Yes." Rosalie answered abruptly without looking at me.

"Rosalie?" I pushed because I didn't understand her reaction to me tonight.

"Just leave it, Edward." Rosalie snapped and met my worried expression coldly. "She knew what she was doing."

I glanced at Alice who was looking between me and Rosalie anxiously before I shifted my gaze on to Jasper. I frowned when I saw he was staring into the empty court in front of him and seemingly ignoring our conversation. He turned and looked at me expressionlessly for a second before he turned back to face the court without saying a word.

"Al, I'm heading down to get changed… Are you coming?" Rosalie asked brightly.

"Sure." Alice nodded.

Alice gathered up her yoga gear and turned to walk to the lift beside Rosalie.

"What's wrong, Rosie?" I heard Alice ask softly.

"Nothing, Al… Just let Bella tell your brothers she's sore if she wants to, okay?" Rosalie replied.

"Okay… Why?" I heard Alice ask curiously before they moved out of earshot.

I looked away from their retreating backs and zipped my squash racquet and goggles into my squash bag. I went and sat next to Jasper when he made no move to stand up and leave his position on the top tier of the benches in front of our court. He looked at me steadily for a long beat of time before he shifted his gaze down to Emmett still chatting with the umpires.

"I cornered Rosalie to find out what had happened when I saw that Bella could hardly walk… Actually, that's wrong… She moved fine when she had to walk past Emmett but then she went back to being hardly able to walk." He muttered.

I rested my elbows on my knees and dropped my head into my hands and swore softly.

"You know she'll hurt worse tomorrow, right?" He asked rhetorically. "It's always the second day after you thrash your body that you really feel the pain." He muttered towards the empty court.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." I muttered harshly into my hands.

"Do you know that Al has asked me for a DSLR just like Bella's for her birthday?" Jasper abruptly changed the topic.

"Um, I do now." I mumbled and shot him a confused look.

"She fucking adores Bella." Jasper muttered.

"Don't we all?" I laughed without humor.

"Not tonight… Not from where I'm sitting." Jasper disputed coldly.

I felt my temper start to simmer at Jasper's cryptic but seemingly judgmental comments and turned to stare at him pointedly. Jasper easily held my glittering gaze for a long minute before he sneered and turned back to the empty court.

"You keep accusing Bella of walking away but all I see is you pushing her away." He said bitterly. "You're going to push away the closest thing Al has to a best friend apart from Rosalie. The real kicker is that your head is stuck so far up your own ass that you don't even realize it." He shook his head in disgust.

He stared down the hallway towards where Emmett was just starting to walk back in our direction with one of the referees.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I growled angrily.

"We met Bella and Angela at the corner where they meet Al." He again started to skirt the real issue. "Bella was carrying a garment bag from a shop that Al loves and so Al asked what Bella had in the bag… Bella said that she bought a dress at lunchtime…" Jasper looked at me archly.

I started to feel sick as I remembered that I'd asked Bella out for dinner tonight after squash and yoga.

"So, I took that little tidbit of information and stored it away… And then I watched Bella walk, sorry, fucking limp out of their yoga class and look around expectantly… And then I watched Bella realize that you weren't showing up." He ground out.

I dropped my head back into my hands and started fluently reciting every curse word and vile profanity I could remember.

"So, anyway, I added two and two together and added it all up to 'you're a fucking asshole'…" He growled loudly over my swearing.

"Why's Edward a fucking asshole?" Emmett asked curiously from beside Jasper.

Jasper glared hotly at Emmett and I kept swearing but had moved in to French, Italian and Spanish when I ran out of words in English.

"And why is he speaking in tongues?" Emmett added worriedly.

"He's a fucking asshole because he stood up Bella." Jasper said bitterly. "Because he didn't have the decency or fucking balls to call her and make up a bullshit excuse so she didn't turn up tonight half expecting him to be here and half expecting him to still hate her guts." His voice rose as he spoke until he was almost yelling.

Jasper stood up jerkily and then jumped down off the bench and snatched up his squash bag before he spun to face Emmett.

"And I don't know why he's speaking in fucking tongues." He spat out. "Maybe because he realizes he's fucked up the best thing he could have known by being that fucking asshole." He yelled.

Jasper pushed roughly past Emmett and strode angrily towards the lift while Emmett watched him storm away. Emmett turned slowly to me after Jasper had disappeared around the corner and rubbed his hand over his short hair while he looked at me uncertainly.

"Did you stand Bella up because of last night?" He asked worriedly.

"I didn't fucking stand her up! Well, I did but… _FUCK!_" I yelled.

"Cool it, Edward." Emmett ground out. "There are people around who don't need to hear it, okay?" He warned.

I dropped my head back down and pressed the heels of my hands into my eye sockets and wondered if Jasper was right and I had fucked up the best thing I could have known.

"What do you mean by you didn't stand her up but you did?" Emmett asked quietly.

"I didn't deliberately stand her up… I forgot we had a date tonight." I muttered miserably.

"How could you forget you had a date with Bella?" Emmett asked disbelievingly.

"That's not fucking helping, Emmett." I bit out. "Because I'm a fucking idiot… Because I got so head-fucked last night when this perfect girl suddenly turned into a smartass, nasty bitch that I just forgot, okay?" I muttered miserably.

"Fuck, Edward." Emmett groaned.

"We had to fire one of our most senior guys today… He told one of the grads that if she sucked him off then he'd overlook her work being two days overdue." I told Emmett tiredly. "Her work was late because she'd been out on stress leave after he'd been talking to her in only sexual innuendos for weeks… She didn't tell anyone about it until she broke down in the lunch room two weeks ago… We moved her onto another team and warned him not to go near her but he still had oversight across her project. He called her into a meeting room yesterday afternoon to discuss his proposal." I muttered angrily.

Emmett looked at me sadly and I ran my hand through my hair before I turned to stare blindly into the empty squash court in front of my seat.

"That's why I was late tonight… I spent most of my day dealing with that bullshit and had to scramble to get to everything else urgent before coming here." I said resignedly. "If I'd been on time, maybe I could have bluffed my way through a date with Bella… She'd never have known that I forgot… And she would never have known that I was so thrown off balance last night that I wouldn't have wanted to go out with her right then anyway." I admitted quietly.

Emmett sighed and then walked to the end of the bench seat and climbed up before he walked along the lower bench to sit at my side. He mimicked my posture by leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and stared into the squash court.

"Rosie made me go through the zoo photos with her after we had dinner." Emmett said quietly. "She wanted to pick out the best shot of us all together and get it framed to give to Bella for her birthday." He explained.

"I was furious… I was tired and cranky and all shaken up by Bella's little performance." He admitted. "Rosie said I had to help her and so I sat there fuming and tried to pick the best shot of all of us together… But, of course, we had to go through all of the photos and I got to see that it wasn't just me who had a perfect afternoon but Jasper and Alice did too… Have you seen the photo when Alice had just asked Jasper if they could get a zebra?" He asked with a smile.

"I saw it… It was one of my favorite shots… I didn't know why he was smiling at her, though." I confessed quietly.

"It was one of my favorites too…" Emmett agreed. "And I got to see that Ben and Angela had a perfect afternoon… and Rosalie did too… She was smiling and laughing in almost every photo of her." He admitted softly.

"There was one of you two that almost made me have to hand in my man-card." I tried to joke but it tasted sour in my mouth.

"I know the shot… Rosie's getting it framed for us." Emmett smiled.

I shifted uneasily as I started to plan what I could say to Bella to explain how I could forget our date or excuse my rudeness towards her last night.

"So, anyway, I was thinking about Saturday and I suddenly realized that zoo Bella was the real Bella…" Emmett got back to his original point. "I call bullshit on her act last night… I think she was deliberately pushing my buttons to get me fired up." Emmett said with all of the insight he needed.

"And it worked…" He admitted glumly. "Even tonight, when I'd already worked it out, I stared straight through her and ignored her… I was still pissed over her mocking me by talking about her old trainer during her crunches." He sighed.

"Maybe she wasn't mocking you… maybe she was psyching herself up to finish out her crunches… I'm used to your crunches and I couldn't have hit a hundred." I offered hesitantly. "Maybe she was firing herself up…"

"Maybe…" Emmett said thoughtfully. "Yeah, so, I'm calling bullshit on bitchy Bella… And I'm giving her props for totaling owning me over it." He finished lightly.

"But how can she do bitchy so well if she isn't bitchy to start with?" I asked what was still worrying me.

"Edward, we all have that in us… I acted like a complete little bitch tonight by ignoring her." Emmett said.

I shrugged dismissively and Emmett sighed and looked briefly at me before he turned his head back towards the empty court.

"How do you turn on the different Edwards you need to fire up your teams… or face down a difficult client… or soothe an anxious grad?" He asked.

I shrugged again and Emmett looked at me until I realized he actually expected me to answer his question.

"I don't know… I just decide what role I need to play and go in and get it done…" I said uncomfortably.

"I do that with my different clients here… Some of them need a charming trainer, some of them need a hardass trainer and some of them need a trainer who will ask about their kids or their day at work." Emmett said quietly.

I nodded my acceptance of his statement because I had seen him play different roles while he was working with clients.

"I'm all of those roles but none of them at the same time." Emmett said and waved his hands awkwardly as he struggled to put his meaning into words. "All of them are a part of me but I'm not solely one of any of those roles." He tried again.

"I get what you're saying, Em." I assured him. "You're charming, a hardass, compassionate and genuinely interested in people but you're also a lot more." I tried.

"Yeah." Emmett said happily. "But I can bring out one of those elements and push only that one thing onto someone if I need to." He explained.

"So, you're saying Bella has an element of bitchy, obnoxious smartass in her." I jumped on his validation of my fear.

"Yeah, I suppose… I'm also saying that she was exaggerating it and hiding all of her other elements… Like compassion, humor, love, playfulness…" He said slowly.

Emmett looked at me sideways and then huffed a laugh.

"You've got a much stronger element of obnoxious smartass in you, Edward." He said lightly.

"Yeah." I agreed quietly.

"And Bella hasn't hidden any side of herself from you, Edward." Emmett said after a long pause. "You've seen her angry, you've seen her sad, you've seen her having fun, you've seen her serious and you've seen her bitchy… you've probably seen some other sides of her that we won't get to see…" He tacked on slyly.

I shrugged because I wasn't going to talk shit about Bella with any guy. Emmett stared out into the empty court and appeared to be thinking about something that he wasn't sure he should say.

"Spit it out, Em." I sighed.

"The only thing I don't like about last night is that Bella did it in front of you… Well, that, and the fact she thought she had to go there in the first place." He muttered.

I shrugged and wondered if Emmett and Rosalie thought I was so fragile that they had to protect me from seeing Bella playacting bad cop to help Emmett. I felt my nausea return when I realized I was that fragile because I'd almost run screaming from the girl I'd thought of as a stranger after we'd gotten showered and changed after our workout. I stood up abruptly and moved to my gym bag to find my phone so I could call Bella and try to explain how I'd forgotten about our date.

Emmett stood up behind me and hovered over me as I felt in the pockets of my suit jacket and pants for my phone. I exasperatedly started pulling out my clothes and toiletries when I couldn't find my phone. I had emptied my gym bag and squash bag out on the bench and was just starting to shove my gear roughly back into my bag when Jasper walked up slowly.

I distractedly glanced up at him as I zipped my two squash racquets into my squash kit and froze when I saw my phone in his hand. Jasper was changed into his jeans and a sweater and his hair was still wet from his shower.

"One voicemail, one text message and one email." Jasper set my limit. "Al says it's her work phone and so she won't be able to turn it off to ignore your sorry ass." He warned.

I nodded impatiently and held out my hand for my phone and almost snatched it off Jasper when he hesitated as he passed it over. I scrolled through my contacts until I got to Bella's entry and then raked my other hand through my hair and looked worriedly at Jasper and Emmett.

"I've got nothing to say to her." I admitted quietly.

Jasper blew out an angry breath and clenched his fists by his side. I glared at him and felt my temper jump.

"I didn't mean that." I bit out. "I meant that I've used up the 'I'm an asshole' excuse and so I don't know what I can say to explain that I'm an asshole." I finished quietly with my anger gone.

"A fucking asshole." Jasper corrected me.

"A stupid, fucking asshole." Emmett corrected Jasper and I almost broke his nose.

"That's not fucking helping, Emmett." I bitterly repeated my admonishment from earlier. "What can I say?" I asked anxiously.

Jasper blew out a heavy sigh and rubbed his hand across his face. I looked at him seriously for a beat in time before I dropped my eyes to my phone.

"I don't know, Edward." Jasper admitted quietly. "I only ever stood up a girl like that when I wanted her to hate me and to stop calling me." He confessed some of his past sins.

"Fuck!" I cursed miserably.

"Can you just say you're sorry and that you need to talk to her in person?" Emmett suggested quietly. "Maybe just admit you forgot after your bad day…" He offered unhappily.

"You forgot?" Jasper asked with disbelief.

"Not helping." I ground out without looking at Jasper.

I took in a deep breath and pressed 'Talk' on Bella's entry in my contacts and lifted the phone to my ear slowly.

"And don't call her fucking Arizona." Jasper hissed.

I glared at him and roughly snatched up my bags and started to walk back to the lift as my call went to her voicemail after ringing only once on the other end. I miserably listened to her warm voice asking me to leave a message and raked my free hand through my hair.

"Bella, it's Edward." I started and realized my words sounded staccato with my anxiety. "I have to… I have to ask you to believe the unbelievable and to forgive the unforgiveable. I really need to talk to you… I really want to see you. Please call me." I smoothed my voice to a soft murmur.

I ended the call and frowned down at my phone until the elevator dinged open and I stepped into it in front of Jasper and Emmett. I glanced at Jasper and met his considering look for a long second before I looked down at my phone again.

"At least you didn't waste your one voicemail." Jasper drawled quietly. "That was pretty smooth."

"Too smooth?" I asked worriedly.

"Nah, probably just right." Jasper reassured me. "She still might not want to ever see you again." Jasper disheartened me.

I followed him and Emmett out of the lift slowly and numbly walked after Emmett towards the change rooms while I stared down at my phone and wondered how long I had to wait before I could call Bella again. I looked up as we passed the juice bar and saw Rosalie and Alice each reading a book with a stack of three more books on the counter. Alice looked up briefly as we passed and met my gaze steadily before she dropped her eyes back down to her book.

Emmett and I pushed into the change room and I showered unhurriedly and slowly got changed while I tried to delay facing Rosalie's anger and Alice's disappointment. I finally couldn't stall any longer and drew in a deep breath before I pushed out into the lobby. I padded slowly over to the juice bar and slid onto a stool on the other side of Jasper and sat in silence while Emmett made me a smoothie. Rosalie's phone chirped loudly with a text message and she picked it up off the counter while still reading her book. She finished the passage she was reading and then held her finger on her place while she opened her text message.

Emmett was subdued when he placed my smoothie in front of me and then walked back to start wiping down the counter. Rosalie placed her phone back on the counter after replying to her text and then reached over the bar to get a napkin to use as a bookmark. She tucked the napkin into her book and closed it before she stood up to move around the bar to help Emmett clean up.

"Em, I'm taking a long, late lunch tomorrow." She told him down the length of the juice bar.

"Sure, Rosie." Emmett agreed quickly. "Do you need me to cover any of your training sessions?" He asked too casually.

"No, I'm free between two and four." She declined shortly.

"What are you doing?" Alice asked curiously. "I can never get you to go out for lunch." She almost pouted.

"I'm helping a friend return a dress." Rosalie muttered quietly.

I froze and stared at Rosalie in horror and realized that it didn't matter what I left in a voicemail or sent in a text message or wrote in an email because Bella would delete them without listening to them or opening them first.

"Can I help too?" Alice asked quietly.

I didn't hear Rosalie's reply as I pushed off my stool and grabbed my bags ready to sprint to Bella's apartment building and pound on every door on every floor until I found her and apologized and won her forgiveness. I spun for the door and started running but hadn't gotten five strides before Jasper tackled me and knocked us both to the ground.

"You are not doing that, Edward." He muttered in a low growl next to my ear. "You are not chasing her away. I won't let you do that to Bella and I won't let you do that to Alice."

"Get the fuck off me." I gasped as I fought for the wind that had been knocked out of me.

"Do not make Alice choose between you and Bella." Jasper growled into my ear. "She will choose you… And it will hurt her to lose Bella. I will not let you hurt her." He ground out through his clenched teeth.

He shoved roughly off me and stood over me as I sat up and struggled to breathe. I finally was able to push myself to my feet and stood a foot away from Jasper and met his fierce gaze hotly. Rosalie stepped between us and pressed her hands against our chests to move us further apart before she glanced over her shoulder at Jasper.

"Jazz, I think you should take Alice home now." She murmured.

"Is he going home? Or is he going straight to Bella's?" Jasper demanded quietly.

"I don't know where she lives… I don't know her apartment number." I confessed in a whisper. "I was going to knock at every apartment until I found her." I muttered miserably.

Rosalie glanced at me sharply and I met her intent stare unhappily before I dropped my eyes and pulled my phone out of my back pocket to make sure it hadn't been broken by Jasper's hit. I turned it over in my hand and then glanced up to see Rosalie and Jasper exchanging a look.

"Edward's coming home with Emmett and me tonight." Rosalie told me and Jasper both firmly. "We're going to go through all our photos of our camping trips and family celebrations so I can get copies to frame and create a photo wall." She planned aloud.

"Can we do that, Jazzie?" Alice asked quietly.

"Create a photo wall?" Jasper asked as he turned and walked back towards Alice.

"Go to Em's and Rose's and go through their photos with them and Edward." Alice clarified.

"Sure, if it's okay with them…" Jasper easily agreed and looked at Rosalie for their invitation.

"Of course." Rosalie smiled.

Emmett suddenly whooped behind the bar and we all turned to look at him like he was crazy.

"Takeout." He grinned. "We'll have to get takeout."

Rosalie scowled at Emmett and his grin faded into a sheepish smile before he turned away to finish cleaning the juice bar so we could leave. Jasper sat at the counter next to Alice and picked up one of the books beside her and started flicking through it.

"Jazzie, remember Bella warned you not to just look at the pictures." Alice murmured without looking away from her book.

"No, Al, Bella challenged me to look only at the pictures and still be interested in Tantra." Jasper mumbled.

I snorted a soft laugh that abruptly died when I realized I might not ever hear Bella give me the same warning. I glanced at Rosalie beside me and followed her gaze to where Emmett was washing out the blenders and setting them aside to air-dry.

"Alice told me about your day." Rosalie murmured. "I thought you were avoiding Bella, so you wouldn't have to rudely ignore her like that big brat over there." She added and nodded at Emmett.

I raked a hand through my hair and then looked down at my phone in my other hand.

"Jazz told me you had plans with Bella…" She trailed off and flicked a glance at me before she returned to watching Emmett.

"She's not going to take my calls or read any text or email I send her, is she?" I mumbled.

"I don't know, Edward." Rosalie murmured. "Probably not…" She admitted quietly.

"Will you talk to her for me?" I asked because I was desperate.

"No." Rosalie replied shortly. "And don't ask your sister to do that either, Edward." She warned.

"Should I send flowers?" I tried. "How can I tell her I'm sorry and that I know I fucked up?" I asked desperately.

"I don't know, Edward." Rosalie repeated and sounded upset.

"So, that's it? I don't get another chance? I just have to accept that I've lost her?" I asked bitterly.

"I don't know, Edward." Rosalie repeated and I saw the shine of tears in her eyes.

"Fuck!" I puffed out with a heavy sigh.

"Bella spent six years with a man that couldn't love her… All of her defenses will be built up to avoid falling for another man who is incapable of loving her back." Rosalie muttered.

"You think I'm incapable of loving her?" I asked miserably.

Rosalie turned to face me with a watery smile.

"I know you already do love her." She whispered. "You were glowing with it on Saturday… Bella too, Edward." She told me.

I frowned down at my phone and then looked up at her and knew she could read my confusion.

"I think both of your defenses clash with each other's… You shut down or retreat when you get surprised or frightened and Bella takes that as a sign that you can't love her…" Rosalie said quietly.

"I can, I do, I will love her." I vowed hurriedly.

"That's not what her defenses will be telling her tonight." Rosalie said unhappily. "And every time she opens herself back up and you shut down on her again she'll be closer to not opening up to give you another chance." She finished and dashed away her unshed tears.

"Fuck!" I breathed brokenly.

"Maybe don't send flowers… but send something she won't immediately recognize as being from you… You could courier a parcel with a note inside… And then she'll have to read your apology." Rosalie suggested suddenly. "She might not accept it but it's better than not being able to apologize at all." She said uneasily.

I nodded quickly because I thought it was a fantastic idea that might have a chance of working.

"But don't you dare say I suggested it." She menaced. "I want to be Bella's friend and she might think I've betrayed her." She warned.

I solemnly drew my finger across the left side of my chest in a cross and then hugged Rosalie fiercely. She laughed softly and briefly returned the tight pressure of my arms before she pushed me away and smoothed back her hair. Emmett hesitantly walked to Rosalie's side and picked up her hand to hold it while he looked into her eyes seriously.

"I'm going to say sorry to Bella tomorrow." He said softly.

Rosalie nodded sharply and then squeezed Emmett's hand before she walked back over to the bar to collect her book and her phone. Alice and Jasper followed her back over and I picked up my bags and walked with Emmett to the parking garage where he kept his jeep. I climbed into the back seat next to Alice and quickly strapped myself in before I leant my head back against the seat and started to think about the perfect gift to courier in my parcel to Bella in the morning.

Jasper distracted me with his new plans for our Whistler trip and I spent the rest of the night gratefully losing myself in the banter and laughter of my family. I kept cycling back to my fears that Bella wouldn't want to see me again and to my vetoing of every gift idea I thought of but I had lost my desperate, crazy edge and was determined to not fuck up this last chance with Bella.


	18. Chapter 18

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**BPOV**

I closed my door to my apartment and shuffled my way over to the elevator down to the street. It was half past six in the morning and my muscles were screaming but I knew I had to run. I was going to the gym to burn off my hurt and disappointment and the edge of bitterness I felt after being stood up by Edward last night. I'd almost been expecting him to call and cancel our date with a bullshit excuse but hadn't expected him to just not show up and almost miss his squash game to avoid me altogether.

I turned out on to the street and had to grit my teeth against the protests of my thighs, hamstrings and calves as I tried to lengthen my stride and felt the cramping, burning consequences of my workout with Emmett and Edward on Monday night. I used the cramped stiffness to distract me from dwelling on Emmett's cold anger towards me last night. I used the sharp pain to help me forget Edward's cavalier, feigned ignorance of our date when he'd mistimed his late arrival at the gym and still run into me as I was leaving with Ben and Angela.

I stopped at the intersection to wait for my turn to cross and resettled the straps of my gym bag and messenger bag on my shoulder. I swapped the garment bag holding the cursed dress I'd bought for my date with Edward to my other forearm and fought to stop myself feeling humiliated when I remembered Jasper's steady, all-seeing gaze after I'd walked out of yoga last night. The walk signal changed in my favor but I froze as I caught a flicker of dark gray movement in my peripheral vision at the same time as I smelled my previously favorite combination of sandalwood, soap and fresh linen.

I glanced sideways and saw that Edward had stopped at my side and was watching me with a smooth, expressionless face. He was dressed in a dark gray suit, with a white shirt and dark burgundy tie and looked, again, inhumanly gorgeous. I started walking across the street and waited for him to accelerate away on his way to his office after a cool, indifferent greeting. I was faintly surprised when he matched his long stride to my stilted steps but then resigned myself to a strained, silent walk until I peeled off into the gym.

"So, what are we doing this morning?" He asked after a long, tense silence.

I looked at him carefully and met his anxious smile with a questioning frown. He waved his hand at my yoga pants and hoodie.

"At the gym? What are we doing this morning?" Edward again included himself in my planned workout.

I turned my face forward down towards the gym and decided I couldn't just ignore him because of our mutual friends.

"Running away." I answered simply.

I saw him run his hand through his hair out of the corner of my eye and lengthened my stride because I didn't want to have this conversation with him this morning. I welcomed the vicious protest of my muscles and pulled my iPod out of my hoodie's pocket so I could select my 'Hard, Fast and Loud' playlist which I'd last heard pounding through the weight room on Monday night. I strode quickly with my head bent over my iPod until we both turned into Pump and walked to the reception desk to collect a locker key.

Rosalie was manning the front desk and looked shocked to see me and Edward together but handed us each a key before she held out her hand to silently ask for my iPod. I smiled awkwardly at her as I hesitated with it gripped in my hand.

"Um, it's the same playlist as Monday, Rosalie… It might not be a good one to pipe through the main room." I shrugged.

"Nonsense." She said firmly. "I've still got that one song stuck in my head, 'I got a list of demands, written on the palm of my hands, I ball my fist and you're gonna know where I stand'…" She sang in a clear, light voice.

She impatiently motioned for me to hand my iPod over and I grinned as I passed it across the counter.

"Saul Williams, 'List of Demands (Reparations)'." I named the artist and song. "It's a good one." I agreed.

"I'll see you before you finish stretching." Edward murmured and then spun away to get changed.

Rosalie watched him jog to the door into the men's change room and then looked back at me with a worried smile. I shrugged unhappily and then turned slowly to the change room to put my bags in my locker so I could start stretching out my sore muscles before I abused them some more.

"I'll see if I can make it in to watch you guys when Brody gets here." Rosalie called.

"It's okay, Rosalie. I'll just be schooling Edward in how to sweat… again." I tried to joke.

"That's what I want to watch." She joked back.

I laughed and flashed her a grin over my shoulder before I pushed into the change room and moved quickly to lock my bags away. I drew in a deep breath and straightened my shoulders before I strode out through the lobby and into the exercise room. I threaded my way quickly to the treadmills in the front window and drew my hood forward before I started to stretch out my complaining thighs and calves. I decided that Edward might be able to keep up with my planned workout but he wouldn't be able to keep up with my running out of his life.

Edward jogged up to the sound system and docked in my iPod before striding quickly over to the treadmill next to mine. I looked at him briefly and then dropped my head and winced as I stretched out my calf muscles on the edge of my machine. 'Testify' by Rage Against The Machine started pounding out of the speakers and I flicked a glance at Edward and saw he was bent over to stretch his hamstrings.

"Have you done sprint intervals on a treadmill before?" I asked over the music.

Edward shook his head as he looked up at me before he changed his stretch. I pulled my eyes away from his strong, lean body in his black wifebeater and basketball shorts and stepped up onto his treadmill to program in our workout.

"We'll warm up for five minutes at a steady jog and then push it up to just faster than three-quarter pace for one minute before we'll drop back to the jog for a one minute recovery.." I explained quickly.

I looked at him over my shoulder to check that he was okay with my plan and he nodded easily and started to stretch his calves.

"We'll do that three times and then we'll push it up to a sprint for forty-five seconds before our one minute recovery." I checked with him again. "We'll do that three times and then end up sprinting flat out for thirty second bursts between recoveries." I finished.

Edward grimaced but then nodded with a quick smile as I stepped off his machine and started programming my own treadmill. Rosalie rolled a Swiss exercise ball up to a position between our treadmills and smirked at Edward as he flashed an apprehensive glance at me when he saw the speeds I had punched into his machine.

"Are you okay with those speeds?" I asked uncertainly.

"Yeah… The last cycle will hurt though." He laughed and then flashed me a smile to show he was trying to lighten the mood.

"Yep." I agreed simply. "That's the plan." I said truthfully.

Edward's gaze sharpened on my face and I dropped my eyes away and then shook out my legs and arms and rolled my shoulders and neck and let the music start to work its driving, pounding, angry magic.

"Are you ready to sweat?" I deliberately repeated my challenge from Monday night but without the cocky attitude.

"Yeah." Edward smiled excitedly and clapped his hands together once.

I smiled genuinely when I saw that he too was getting pumped up by the music and we both started our machines at the same time. I gritted my teeth against the protests of my legs as I pushed myself up to the jog we would always return to throughout our workout and tried to breathe through the pain and smooth out the jerkiness of my stride. I met Rosalie's worried gaze and wondered if she would guess that I needed to break through this pain that reminded me of my Monday night workout that had upset Edward so much that he couldn't bear to even face me last night.

I breathed through my unhappiness and pain and visualized myself bundling up all my feelings of confusion and hurt and then lightly tossing them aside. I pictured the ball of poisonous emotions being caught by a strong, cleansing wind that whisked them further away and dissolved them like wisps of smoke on the breeze. I inhaled empowering breaths and exhaled my weaknesses and let the music fill me with strength and resolve and the power to run away.

Our treadmills beeped their countdown to our first run in tandem and I smiled as I felt the power and strength return to my legs. I quickened and lengthened my stride with the spinning mat under my feet and knew I would be okay. I knew I would be able to maintain my friendships with Rosalie and Alice even though I'd let my heart be broken by Edward. I knew I would be able to exist until that heartbreak had faded to a dull ache and I was ready to move on and open myself up to love again. I knew I would be strong.

I held the fast jog easily for the minute until our machines beeped their warning of the upcoming slowdown and then slowed back down to our recovery pace. I turned my head to check on Edward and saw he was striding easily beside me with only slightly accelerated breathing. I swung my head back to look out the window and again blocked his view of my profile with my hood before he could catch me checking that he was okay.

Our treadmills chorused their countdown to our next run and I pushed up to the faster speed and reveled in the slight burn in my lungs as my body started to work to meet its aerobic challenge. Edward and I followed the programmed intervals until I saw we were fifteen seconds away from our first forty-five second effort at a proper sprint. I looked across at Edward and saw he was still jogging strongly beside me on his treadmill.

"Here we go!" I called over the music. "Jump to the sides if you're going to lose your stride, you can pick it up again in the jog." I instructed.

Edward smiled quickly and nodded his understanding and then flashed his eyes down to the control panel in front of his hips when our machines beeped their countdown to the upcoming acceleration. I saw that he sensibly rested one hand on the bar at his side as we quickened our pace up to a fast run. I pushed my hood back as I sprinted so that I could keep an eye on Edward without turning my head and then concentrated on running lightly on the speeding treadmill.

I was breathing hard when we slowed to our recovery jog but smiled easily at Rosalie as she lightly bounced on her exercise ball to the pounding music. She flashed me a wide smile when I caught her eye before she turned to smile at Edward.

"I'm definitely joining you two for your next session on the treadmills." She laughed.

"I have to survive this one first, Rose." Edward puffed.

"Are you doing okay?" I called casually over the loud music without looking at Edward.

"Yep… It's awesome fun." He laughed suddenly.

I looked over at him dubiously and seriously wondered if he could be slightly crazy and then followed his minute gesture to where we had attracted an audience of five people behind my shoulder.

"Everybody thinks so, Bella." He assured me seriously.

Our treadmills started to beep and Edward and I both dropped our gazes to their controls automatically and then prepared ourselves to move up to our sprint. I noticed that Edward was now confident enough to not need to use the bar but then forced myself to focus on the rapid acceleration up to our fast run. The sprints got longer and the recoveries got shorter as we ran through the intervals and I unzipped and shrugged out of my hoodie and dropped it to the ground before our third punishing step up in intensity.

I caught Edward checking me out and resolutely turned my head forward and then glanced down at the timer on my controls.

"Okay, twenty seconds… This is fast." I warned Edward.

"Jump to the sides, pick it back up in the recovery." He repeated my instructions of what to do if he got in trouble.

He again placed his hand down for balance as our treadmills counted us in to our fastest sprint and I drew in a cleansing, focusing breath and then sped up to a flat out run. Edward and I sprinted side by side for our thirty second interval that slowed down and stretched out towards the end but I forced myself to continue racing until I could decelerate with our treadmills.

A loud, piercing trilling whistle behind my shoulder made me flick a startled look backwards and I saw Emmett standing with our now bigger audience. Edward was too winded to do anything but flash a quick smile at his brother and I watched him carefully to make sure he could recover enough to stay safe on his treadmill. I smiled and laughed breathlessly at Rosalie when her new favorite song started playing loudly and she stood up and started dancing to the pounding beat. I glanced down at my controls and then looked back at Edward and saw that he was mostly recovered and was grinning at Rosalie as he jogged strongly with an easy gait.

"Twenty seconds… Ready to go again?" I called over to Edward.

"Fuck yeah." He grinned and I again wondered about his sanity.

Rosalie moved out of our line of sight so she wouldn't distract us with her dancing and I noticed with a start that we had an audience of early morning office commuters watching through the front window. Our treadmills beeped us into our sprint and Edward and I took off and thundered along on our twin machines for the endless thirty seconds until we could cycle back to the punishing jog that now only just let us catch our breath as we tired. 'Head like a Hole' by Nine Inch Nails started pounding through the room as I watched the timer count down our too short recovery minute and I fought the burn in my lungs to deepen and slow my breathing. I felt my adrenaline jump with the music and glanced over to check on Edward and saw his stride was easy and light even as he breathed heavily and looked sweaty and flushed.

"Twenty seconds… Last one, full speed." I warned.

Edward nodded sharply and reached his hand down to the bar at his side and prepared to kick up to our flat out sprint. Our machines beeped down the last five seconds and we powered up to run at the treadmills' maximum speeds just as the chorus hammered through the speakers and I could have sprinted for hours. I glanced down in surprise when my treadmill beeped before it decelerated and slowed down with it almost unhappily. I jogged until I had won some of my wind back and glanced back at Edward.

"I usually cool down at a walk for five minutes." I said loudly enough that he could hear me over the driving music.

Edward nodded again and punched his machine down quickly to a brisk walk but I kept up my grueling jog for the rest of the song. I slowed my machine down to a walk and then looked around and gratefully saw that we had lost our audiences. I pushed the wisps of hair that had worked loose from my ponytail back off my forehead and inhaled air to the bottom of my lungs and kept walking until I felt my heart rate slow and my body temperature lower.

Edward stopped his machine and followed its deceleration to a standstill and then stepped down and swiftly made his way over to the sound system to retrieve my iPod. I watched a tall, slender blonde approach him and saw his quick, easy smile and then heard his velvet laugh in the beat of time between when he undocked my iPod and when he flicked back on the generic pop music.

I stopped my treadmill and walked it to its slow stop before I stepped off and bent to pick up my hoodie. I wiped down the controls and handle bars with my hoodie and then quickly headed for the change rooms without looking again at Edward. I'd successfully made my escape all the way to the lobby before I sensed Edward jogging the last three steps to my side.

"Your iPod." He murmured as he slowed to match my hurried walk and held it out.

"Thanks." I mumbled and accepted back my iPod carefully so I didn't make contact with his hand.

"Will you wait for me?" Edward asked.

"No." I replied quietly and wasn't only referring to waiting for him to finish changing this morning.

Edward nodded abruptly and then jogged ahead and pushed into the men's change room. I smiled at Rosalie who was back behind the reception desk and looked like she was signing up three new customers with Brody. I returned her happy wave by lamely lifting my hand and felt my smile freeze at the predatory looks of the two men filling out the application forms for Brody. I pushed into the change rooms and made my way over to my locker and then pulled out my work clothes and stacked them on the bench before stripping out of my sweaty gym clothes. I grabbed my towel, body wash and shampoo and rushed to nab the last free shower stall and then washed quickly to free up the shower for the next woman needing to get ready for work.

I toweled off and stalked back to my locker and then quickly slipped into my clean underwear and bra. I pulled on my navy blue pants and white blouse before I sat down to push my feet into my thin blue socks and sensible flats. I didn't dare attempt to wear heels and put further strain on my complaining leg muscles until I was completely recovered from my Monday night workout. I roughly toweled my hair drier and then took my brush and hair elastic over to the mirror and plaited my damp hair back into a French braid. I hurried back to my locker and packed away my workout clothes, trainers, towel and toiletries before I shrugged into my suit jacket and then grabbed my bags and pushed out into the lobby.

I hesitated when I saw Edward standing at the front desk talking to Brody as he efficiently knotted his tie around his neck and snugged it tighter around his neck. He saw me step up to the reception desk and swiftly knelt to tie his shoe laces as I handed my locker key to Rosalie.

"I'll have to refund your membership fees, Bella. We've had four people off the street sign up this morning." She said lightly.

I smiled and shook my head down at my feet before I tucked the garment bag holding the cursed dress across my gym bag resting against my hip. I looked back up at Rosalie and didn't feel like smiling when I met her steady gaze.

"Are we still on for our late lunch?" She asked quietly.

"Yep." I answered simply. "Two-fifteen for a quick bite before we shop." I confirmed and tried to sound light and carefree.

I forced myself to smile my goodbye and turned for the door with a brief wave at Brody. I glanced out of the corner of my eye at Edward when he quickly stood and grabbed up his gym bag and suit jacket and stepped to my side. I tried to keep my frown from showing as I wondered if I could tell him that I wanted to walk to work alone without jeopardizing my friendships with his sister and sister-in-law. I paused for the automatic doors and then stepped out on to the street and turned towards my office without acknowledging his quiet, almost hesitant, presence at my side.

"That was a great workout." He murmured after we had walked in silence up to the first intersection.

"Yeah, it's a good one when you're pressed for time." I agreed as I willed the traffic signals to change in our favor.

"I feel exhausted but exhilarated at the same time." He murmured quietly.

"Endorphins." I nodded.

The lights finally decided to grant me my reprieve and we followed the movement of the small herd of people waiting to cross the street. We fell back into our loaded silence as Edward kept pace beside me and I started to plan what I would pack for my weekend in Forks to distract myself from my uneasiness and hurt that had returned with him at my side. I held in my exasperated sigh when Edward kept walking with me past the corner where we usually met Alice and I realized he was going to follow me all the way to my building.

"Would you consider holding on to that dress in case you can ever forgive me?" He asked quietly.

I dropped my head to hide my face when I realized that someone, probably Jasper, had guessed that I had bought the stupid dress for the date that Edward had changed his mind about and then told Edward.

"No." I said to the pavement. "It's jinxed now." I added and didn't know yet if I was only referring to the dress.

I gritted my teeth when I heard Edward exhale and imagined it sounded like an unhappy sigh with too much feeling. I saw Edward rake a hand through his hair in my peripheral vision and uneasily wondered why he was forcing this confrontation.

"I wasn't avoiding you." Edward said abruptly and his voice was clipped. "… I forgot we had plans." He confessed miserably.

I puffed out one breath of shocked laughter which held more pain than amusement and flashed a disbelieving look as his tense profile. He turned his head to meet my wide eyes and I tried to read in his face whether he really was going to try to avoid acknowledging his reaction to me on Monday night. Edward quirked one side of his mouth up in a small, sad smile and I looked away quickly and fixed my gaze on the entrance to my building.

"I think that actually makes me feel worse." I muttered honestly. "I was looking forward to our date all day." I said and shared some of my hurt.

Edward ran a hand through his hair but didn't try and bullshit me and say he had been eagerly anticipating spending the evening with me after our weights session with Emmett when he had seemed repulsed by me upsetting his brother. I swallowed back the bubble of tears I could feel tightening my throat and decided I had to address the elephant crowding between us on the sidewalk.

"I warned you I did bad cop very well." I said quietly and tried to keep the wounded accusation out of my voice.

"You did." Edward accepted miserably.

I hesitated outside my building as I waited for him to say more and studied his downturned face as he looked down at his feet. I tore my eyes away from his devastating beauty and looked at the slowly revolving doors into the lobby.

"So, where does this leave us?" Edward asked in just above a whisper.

I blinked rapidly as I watched the doors turn and clenched my aching heart against the quiet pain I thought I could hear in his voice. I considered the friendships growing between me and Alice and Rosalie and compared their value with the misery I would have to continue to face being around Edward. I flicked a look at the man who could make me happy just when he smiled and could make my heart skip simply with the touch of his hand and didn't know if I was strong enough to move on with him still in my life.

"Friends?" I eventually offered uncomfortably.

"I don't want to be your friend, Bella." Edward said quickly and I froze with the fresh pain I felt. "Fuck! I didn't mean that, I meant that I want to be more than friends… _Fuck!_" Edward finished in an almost inaudible whisper.

I shrugged unhappily and turned towards the revolving doors so I could leave before he saw me cry.

"Bella, wait!" Edward stopped me.

I turned back slowly and saw that he had put on his mirrored aviator sunglasses and was resettling his folded jacket back on his forearm. I bit my lower lip viciously between my teeth and used the pain to hold back my tears and focused my gaze on his perfect cheekbones to avoid my too pale reflection in his sunglasses.

"I can do friends… If that's all your offering, I'll take it." He said quietly.

"Okay… friends." I said as I nodded because I didn't know what else I could say. "See you tomorrow, Edward." I mumbled.

"See you tomorrow, Arizona." Edward murmured.

I flashed him a sad smile at his return to my stupid nickname and spun to walk quickly into my building. I flicked a look back over my shoulder as I stepped around with the revolving door and saw Edward watching me in the his same, frozen position on the pavement. I turned my head away quickly and almost ran to the bank of elevators as I fought for composure and calm before I faced my colleagues.

I pressed into the lift when it arrived and hit the button for my floor before I closed my eyes and visualized myself rising out of the murky swirl of my confused emotions with the elevators ascent. I breathed in calmness and clarity and breathed out anxiety and confusion and stepped out onto my floor tenuously holding onto my façade of smooth composure. I strode to my office and shut myself in and had cemented my false surface of easy unconcern in place before I met Rosalie and Alice for our late lunch.

I enjoyed my late lunch break with Rosalie and Alice as we chatted about everything and anything except Edward. I made plans with Rosalie to repeat my punishing sprint intervals workout with her when I'd returned from my weekend in Forks. I made plans with Alice to visit the Pike Place Market the following weekend and got caught up in her infectious enthusiasm. We only shared one awkward moment when Rosalie casually asked if I wanted to turn my birthday celebration into strictly a girls' night out because the guys had crashed our zoo expedition. I smiled gratefully at her care and concern but reassured her that we would have fun with whoever turned up and that I wanted to share my night with all of my Seattle friends.

We returned my dress and exchanged it for an almost sheer, floating white top and a set of decadent white lingerie that could never be called pure and virginal. I walked Rosalie back to the gym but politely declined her invitation to go in and see Emmett so I could hurry home and finish the work I had brought home to make up for my early exit from the office.

I completed my work before I soaked the last of my lingering soreness away in a long, hot bath and made myself a simple dinner that I ate as I watched mindless television until I felt tired. I collapsed into bed but didn't sleep until the early hours of the morning because I was haunted by Edward's downturned face and his soft murmur that he didn't want to just be friends that had sounded strangely more like a plea. I tossed and turned for the rest of the morning and was haunted by vivid dreams of Edward at the zoo looking happy and carefree as he branded his name on my heart with every smile and careless touch of his hand.


	19. Chapter 19

**Full disclaimer at start of Chapter 1:**** No copyright infringement is intended.**

**EPOV**

_I watch Bella as she crawls up the huge bed towards the dream me, lying on the bed propped up on his elbows and panting slightly in anticipation of her approach. I see dream me sit up to pull Bella onto his lap and then dream me turns his head to stare back at voyeur me with heavy, lust filled eyes. I realize I am watching me and Bella in a mirror when Bella turns her head and meets my eyes and smiles with wicked delight at catching me enjoying the show before she turns back to mirror me and laughs into his sinful grin. _

_I tear my eyes away from the mirror to look at the stunning naked woman straddling my lap but she won't lift her face to meet my gaze. She presses a hot, open mouth kiss against my throat and I roll back my head and catch sight of Bella and mirror me kissing passionately. Bella has her arms tightly wrapped around his neck and mirror me is palming and squeezing Bella's delectable breasts between their closely pressed bodies. _

_I flash my eyes back to the naked goddess on my lap and gasp as she raises herself slightly and eases the delicious ache of my swollen, straining cock as she slicks down my hard length and envelopes me in her wet, tight heat. I grabbed her hip with one hand and raise her chin gently with my other hand but she keeps her eyes lowered and I groan my frustration that I cannot lose myself in her warm, chocolate eyes. I buck my hips upwards and bury myself deeper in her tight wetness and I moan my satisfaction that I can lose myself in her gripping heat. _

_I turn my head to look at mirror me and see he has collapsed back onto the bed and is guiding Bella's sliding, circling, grinding hips with both hands as she arches her back and smiles down into his awed eyes. Mirror me sits up and wraps one arm around Bella's hips and balances himself on his other hand on the mattress as he starts to urgently meet Bella's thrusting hips. Bella drops her head back and closes her eyes momentarily before she snaps her eyes open to meet mirror me's adoring gaze as they buck and ride closer to their mutual orgasms. _

_I hiss in a breath and tear my eyes back to my naked angel as she drags her wet heat up my cock before I gasp out a grunt when she slams down on my straining hardness. I helplessly let her catch my hands and hold them to the mattress beside my head as she repeats her slow, gripping rise and rough dive on my cock. I futilely test the strength of her binding pressure on my wrists. _

"_Let me touch you." I plead. "I need to touch you." _

_My naked goddess drops her head and answers my plea by grinding and circling on my cock and forcing me to clench my fists in the sheet above my head to bear the insane pleasure wracking my body. I uselessly try to penetrate the curtain of her long, brown hair that hides her face from me. _

"_Let me see you." I plead. "I need to see you." _

_My naked, mute angel answers my plea by pulsing her slick heat up and down my cock and forcing me to clamp shut my eyes against the building, anticipatory pressure tightening my balls. I hopelessly try to break her withdrawn silence by driving my cock up to meet her fast plunges down my length. _

"_Let me hear you." I plead. "I need to hear you."_

_My distant, naked goddess answers my plea by increasing the urgency of her sliding, gliding, riding dance and forces me to gasp and pant for air, jammin my ears with the harsh hitching and heaving of my breaths. I desperately try to reach her through her suffocating defenses by writhing and pumping and thrusting and straining to match her wild lead. _

"_Let me love you." I beg. "I need to love you." _

_My disheveled, sweaty angel answers my entreaty by slowing and gentling her movements to a torturous pace that cannot satisfy the coiling vice pressing at my balls and swelling my cock. I twist one wrist out from her binding hand and grab her hip so I can follow my primal urge to keep thrusting until I pump her to overflowing with my seed. _

"_Baby doll, you don't need that." My devious, deceitful naked angel sneers._

"_Chelsea?" I gasp brokenly even as I ram my exploding cock into her depths. _

I jolted awake, panting and sweating, with my hand gripping my aching, throbbing cock. I pulled my hand roughly up to my swollen head and jerked my wrist to smear the leaking pre-cum in my palm before I snapped my hips up to fuck my clenched fist and shot my load across my stomach and chest with jagged thrusts. I gritted my teeth and swallowed my groan as I came hard because I wasn't sure whose name I would grunt in my just awake stupor. I collapsed back onto my mattress and covered my eyes with my elbow and then lay holding my softening cock until my alarm blared that it was time to get up and start my Thursday.

I stood naked in my kitchen and stupidly blinked at my coffee pot as I watched it fill and thought about Bella. I was becoming an expert in analyzing my sex dreams slash night terrors and I knew what I had been subconsciously processing overnight. I wanted to be mirror me and share with Bella that playful, raw, intense love that had mesmerized me but I was letting myself be weakened and made helpless by holding on to my ingrained feelings of fear and betrayal. I frowned as I realized that my dream had revisited and reinforced my revelation from yesterday that I would never win Bella back from the withdrawn, brittle woman I'd stalked to work unless I broke free from my suffocating grip on the past.

I had realized while I ran beside Bella on our speeding treadmills yesterday morning that Bella wasn't running away but was running through her pain and obviously hurt feelings. I had watched her almost embrace and welcome the physical pain and exertion of our taxing workout and use the pounding of our feet and the driving force of the music as a form of meditation. I had seen her become stronger and surer and more resolute as we ran and I had sickly realized that saying sorry wouldn't be enough this time. I had known I still had to explain what had happened on Tuesday night but had also known that I couldn't expect a trite apology to fix the pain I had caused Bella.

So I had let Bella set the conditions of allowing me to still spend time with her by asking careful questions that, l hoped, let her know how I felt but enabled her to dictate what she could tolerate. I'd known when she'd told me that she wouldn't wait for me to get showered and changed after our workout that she was really telling me that she wouldn't wait for me to be ready to work through my shit and stop hurting her. I'd not been able to hide my emotions as easily as I had framed my questions and my composure had broken when I'd almost begged her to accept me as more than a friend.

She had left me shattered on the pavement and only just clinging to my hold on my shredded emotions. I'd numbly turned towards the office and started walking but abruptly decided I needed to pull myself together more before I faced anyone. I had turned into the first café I passed and ordered coffee, juice and a bagel while I had tried to work through my rioting thoughts.

The caffeine and carbohydrate hit had brought me my first revelation; I needed to do something about my workload. I was rapidly losing all of my joy and my pride in my company and spent a lot of my time just juggling my schedule and competing demands. I'd regained some of my composure as I had clinically analyzed what I needed to do to reduce some of the overwhelming pressure on my time and energy. I'd emailed Jasper using my Blackberry to let him know I needed some of his time during the day to discuss my new plan to hire him and me personal assistants. I'd also outlined a proposal to hire at least two account managers to take over the client liaisons that sapped so much of my energy.

I had ordered more juice and a muffin as I'd turned my, by then, detached analysis on what I needed to do to finally get past the baggage that I'd unconsciously been carrying with me for the last ten years. Ten years ago, I'd vowed that I'd never let another woman hurt me like Chelsea had but I now saw that it hadn't been a decision made to be strong and take control, like I had thought in all of my teenage wisdom. It had been a decision made to avoid feeling the same fear and pain and betrayal that had nearly destroyed me as a heartbroken, seventeen year old kid. Instead of acknowledging and facing those feelings, like I had seen Bella do that morning, I had buried and avoided them and they had festered and strengthened in their power to bring me undone. Now, when I most needed to be strong and in control and able to follow my heart to win my girl, I was weak and off balance and causing her pain.

My second revelation had come when I'd been staring broodingly at the crumbs of my muffin and had hit me like a garbage truck going downhill at forty miles per hour. I had known that I couldn't change only for Bella but had to also change for myself and that's when it had hit me… I wanted to be as happy and as assured as the man I pretended to be most of the time. I wanted to replace the façade I painted on with the real me but not the moody, erratic, emotionally stunted man I had to grow past. I wanted to replace my fake surface with the happy, relaxed, trusting and confident man I'd been at the zoo. I wanted to be the man that Bella seemed to want at her side.

I'd left the café in a hurry and then walked around downtown Seattle while I'd processed my confession to myself that I was rarely truly happy. I'd been filled with a need to do something practical and proactive to start my change. I didn't want to sit in a stranger's office and talk about my feelings, I already had Emmett and Rosalie acting like my own personal therapists, but I needed tools that would help me exorcise my poisonous doubts and paralyzing fears. I had brooded on Bella's seeming meditative state as we'd worked out and run faster than I'd ever run on a treadmill before and had realized it was similar to the breathing and visualization techniques I had been given in college to help me sleep.

I had turned towards my office then, needing to google the new-age, hippy fairy centre where Jasper had dragged me our junior year when he'd come over and found me shakily drinking coffee after not sleeping for ninety-six hours. I had remembered Claire, with her soulful eyes and clichéd cheesecloth shirt, and how she had asked simple, direct questions and then led me through the exercises that I still used if I couldn't sleep and wasn't in the midst of a panic attack.

Back in the office, I'd quickly found the details for the healing centre and phoned immediately. I'd been surprised but almost relieved when I'd found that my favorite hippy, Claire, was still working there and I had been shocked that she had not only remembered me but had called me her burnished angel. I'd made an appointment for Friday morning and entered it in my schedule so I had no chance of forgetting it no matter what happened at work or with Bella before then. I'd felt lighter and more in control when I'd hung up the phone to Claire and had finally felt a true confidence in my ability to adapt and stay strong so I could win back Bella's trust and keep her at my side.

My phone rang as I was still standing naked in my kitchen and I strode to the hall stand to see who was calling so early. I saw Jasper's grinning mug lighting up the display and decided to call out his skiving ass if he was going to call in suspiciously sick on the same day Bella and the girls had plans to run amok. I answered the call but smirked as I didn't say anything to greet Jasper.

"Edward?" Jasper's drawl sounded uncertain.

"Jasper?" I mocked him lightly.

"You are so grade school, you prick." He muttered.

"Great, how are you this morning?" I immaturely continued my fun.

"I was calling to see if we're actually going to practice tonight or if we're going to end up heading straight to a bar." Jasper ignored my smart ass. "I don't want to lug around my squash kit all day if we're not playing." He drawled.

"Hey, Jasper, ask me what I'm wearing?" I laughed, still bubbling with the freedom I felt after my revelations from yesterday.

"You are a sick, nudist fuck, Edward Cullen." Jasper muttered. "Are we playing squash tonight, or what?" He bit out.

"Um… what." I hesitated.

Jasper ended the call without saying anything more and I laughed to myself and then quickly made way back to the kitchen and poured a coffee that I took back into my bedroom so I could get ready for my day. I showered, shaved and dressed, deliberately selecting a black collarless shirt so I only had to shed my black suit jacket to be dressed to party, before I grabbed my laptop and headed out the door. I stopped at the same café where I'd had my blinding revelations and bought breakfast plus a muffin for Alice and then hurried to the office so I could power through my work and hopefully leave early at the end of the day.

On an impulse, I sent Bella a text message to wish her a happy birthday before I shut myself behind my closed door for the morning.

_**Happy bday, Az. **_

I tried not to wait anxiously for a reply because I knew it was a miracle that she'd even agreed that we could be friends and powered up my laptop and busied myself with checking my unread emails. After an interminable ten minutes my phone sounded its text message alert and I snatched up my phone.

_**Cheers, its  
gonna b gr8 **_

I was conflicted by Bella's reply because, on one hand, I read it to be a very casual, almost offhand return of my text that firmly reinforced that we were just friends but, on the other hand, I was ecstatic that she'd replied at all. I hesitated before I decided to not push my luck by sending a reply and set my phone back down on my desk and then froze when I saw the bag holding the digital photo frame I'd bought yesterday for Alice's upcoming birthday. I sickly realized I hadn't bought Bella a gift and raked a hand through my hair as I tried to desperately think of a gift good enough for the woman I was hopelessly infatuated with that was still appropriate for our just friends status.

I grabbed up my jacket and hurried back out of my office when I abruptly realized I already knew the perfect gift. On Tuesday night, I'd finally settled on couriering Bella two matching t-shirts from the Seattle Space Needle, one in her size and one in my size, with my apology and an open-ended invitation for dinner. I'd never sent the gift because I had run into her on her way to the gym and won as much of her forgiveness that I could possibly ask for and hadn't wanted to push her any more.

I caught a cab to the Space Needle and asked the driver to wait and then ran into the just opened gift shop and bought my t-shirts. I decided to just leave them in their bag but to add a handwritten note to my gift back at the office. The cabbie double-parked to let me out and I rushed back into the building to finally start work.

The rest of my day flew past and by five o'clock I decided I'd completed enough work that I could happily leave and worry about my early finish or my late start after my hippy consultation the next morning. I sent Ben and Jasper an email asking if they would be ready to leave soon and got two almost simultaneous replies that basically said 'fuck yeah'. I laughed and shut down my laptop and then grabbed up my gift bag and strode quickly out of my office over to the elevator where Jasper and Ben were both already waiting.

Ben punched the call button as soon as he saw me and then flinched when his phone chirped that he'd received a new text message. I looked at him questioningly when he groaned softly and flashed a quick look at me and Jasper.

"Angie is drunk texting me." He mumbled and seemed embarrassed.

"At a quarter past five?" Jasper asked uncertainly.

"Yeah, well she's a bit of a light weight." He mumbled as he quickly replied to his text. "Are we going to the bar around from Pump first?... Or should we just meet straight up with the girls?" He asked too casually.

I looked at Jasper and gestured that it was his call while I tried to disguise my eagerness to see Bella immediately. Jasper smirked at me but I ignored his smartass attitude as I stepped into the just arrived lift and turned to face the doors.

"Maybe we should go and meet the girls sooner rather than later." Jasper drawled. "We can confiscate Angela's phone."

I shrugged noncommittally but smiled at the doors at Jasper's disbelieving snort of laughter. Ben nodded down at his phone and started tapping out a new text message that he quickly sent and then led us out of the elevator on the ground floor. I sent Emmett a quick text to tell him the change in plans after asking Jasper where we were meeting the girls. We'd pushed out onto the street and turned in the opposite direction to Pump when Ben's phone chimed again and he quickly opened his new message before he started laughing. Jasper finally cleared his throat to let Ben know we were still waiting for an explanation when he didn't share what had made him laugh.

"The mythical unicorn tattoo." He snickered.

"Who's got a tattoo of a unicorn?" Jasper asked quickly.

"Not of a unicorn… Bella has a tattoo… I tease her that it's like a unicorn and only shows itself to virgins." Ben mumbled as he replied to the picture text.

"Show!" Jasper demanded and tried to snatch Ben's phone away.

"Wait!" Ben protested as he ducked away from Jasper's hands.

I crowded behind Ben and tried to see his phone over his shoulder and he laughed and spun away from both me and Jasper as he tried to send off his reply. He glared at both of us as he handed Jasper his phone.

"No one says a word!" He warned. "Not one word!" He repeated.

Jasper snatched the phone as he and I both laughed and then blocked Ben with our bodies to stop him taking back his phone.

"Guys!" Ben protested. "Angie and Bella will kill me." He muttered.

"Ben, if Bella is showing her unicorn tattoo and Angela is taking photos of it then neither of them will care." Jasper laughed.

He stopped dead in the street and lifted the phone closer to his face and then shrugged me away when I pressed closer to see the photo.

"Fuck." Jasper mumbled.

I grabbed the phone and quickly looked at the photo of creamy, porcelain skin inked with a vertical line of small kanji characters next to a cherry blossom. My eyes widened as I looked closer and realized I was looking at one side of Bella's ass and that Bella Swan was wearing a sheer white thong.

"Fuck!" I exhaled.

Ben snatched his phone back from my frozen fingers and looked carefully at the photo before looking questioningly between me and Jasper. Jasper shrugged unconcernedly and I shook my head to try and clear the fog of lust that had stopped any other thought penetrating my brain other than how to get a private, up close viewing of Bella's tattoo.

"What?" Ben asked in confusion.

"Nothing." Jasper and I mumbled in unison.

Ben frowned at us and then shrugged and started walking again. Jasper laughed at me as I raked a hand through my hair and blinked twice to clear the image of Bella's pretty ass from my retinas. I huffed a laugh and then jogged to catch up with Ben just as he passed a Japanese restaurant.

"Hey, Ben, can I borrow your phone?" I asked quickly.

"Why?" He asked suspiciously.

I jerked my thumb at the restaurant and then impatiently motioned for his phone.

"So, we can find out what the tattoo says." Jasper answered for me with a wicked grin.

"Okay." Ben agreed uncertainly.

I smiled as reassuringly as I could manage as I took his phone that he hesitantly offered and then quickly pushed in through door and left Jasper and Ben waiting for me on the street. I turned on my most charming, crooked smile at the woman dressed in a kimono at the hostess station and showed her the phone while covering the glimpse of Bella's wicked panties with my thumb.

"Could you please tell me what this says?" I murmured.

"Sorry, it's in Chinese." She smiled after a quick glance at Bella's tattoo.

I smiled sheepishly and she giggled and then handed me a takeout version of their menu. I murmured a soft thank you and then quickly rejoined Ben and Jasper outside and started to scan the street for a Chinese restaurant while I tucked the menu into my pocket.

"It's Chinese kanji." I muttered distractedly to their questioningly looks.

I started walking with them and kept one ear tuned to their conversation while I kept looking for my opportunity to find out what Bella's tattoo meant. I finally spotted a Chinese restaurant across the street and bumped Jasper's arm to get his attention and then pointed to where I was going with Ben's phone that I was still holding.

"Cool, we're just three doors up." Jasper said and pointed out the bar where we were meeting the girls.

I nodded and waved to let them know I'd meet them in the bar and then stepped to the curb to wait for a gap in the traffic. I jogged across the road and then stepped into the quiet restaurant. I smiled easily at the young guy who approached me as I hesitated near the front desk.

"Could you please tell me what this says?" I asked politely as I again held out the partly obscured phone.

The young guy frowned at the phone and then called to the back of the restaurant in Cantonese. An older woman, who could have been his grandmother, walked towards us through the empty tables and chairs. The young guy spoke to her rapidly and she stepped to my side and looked closely at the image of Bella's ass cheek before she spoke quietly and paused.

"Um… She says it says Hard, Fast, Loud." The guy said with a shrug.

The older lady pushed my thumb away from the corner of the photo and then spoke quickly again and laughed. The guy flashed a startled, embarrassed look at her and then quickly looked down at the floor which made the old woman laugh again.

"She says, that with the flower, it is probably meant to say 'Harder, Faster, Louder'." He mumbled to the ground.

I felt my ears start to burn red and cleared my throat lightly while I tried not to think about Bella having those three words inked on her ass. I willed myself not to think about her naked in front of me on her hands and knees with those three words inked on her ass and tried to distract myself by asking the question that I now needed answered.

"What does the cherry blossom mean?" I asked as smoothly as I could.

The young guy glared at me before he turned slightly to the older woman who was smiling between us and asked my question. She smiled slyly at me and then spoke rapidly and waved the young guy to tell me what she had said.

"The cherry blossom is a special symbol for power… and feminine beauty and sexuality." He muttered miserably. "It often is used to show feminine power and dominance." He added uncomfortably.

The old lady waited to make sure he was finished translating her words and then spoke briefly before she patted my arm and started to walk towards the back of the restaurant.

"She says that in herbal lore the cherry blossom is the symbol for love." The guy said with relief.

I nodded thoughtfully and quickly decided to change our usual Friday night dinner reservations to their restaurant to thank them for their translation services. The young guy quickly forgave me for embarrassing him in front of his wife's grandmother, who I learnt was the older lady, as we chatted while he wrote down our reservation and I entered it into my blackberry. I thanked him profusely before I stepped back out on to the street and quickly dodged between the evening rush hour traffic across to the bar where I would see Bella. I paused at the door and deleted the photo of Bella's ass cheek from Ben's phone before I pushed into the crowded bar.

I went straight to the bar and bought a neat double scotch that I drained before I ordered another to take to the table. I knew that Jasper and Ben would have bought the next round of drinks for the girls and themselves but would have left me to decide what I was drinking. I desperately tried to forget the old lady's translation of Bella's tattoo and the Chinese symbolism behind the cherry blossom so I didn't have to walk around with a hard-on all night. I scanned the room and finally spotted Jasper and Ben with the girls in a booth near the pool tables and was astonished to find Emmett already sitting in the booth between Rosalie and Bella.

I quickly made my way over to the table and avoided Jasper's and Ben's curious expressions. I smiled around the table as a greeting and passed Ben his phone but then focused on Bella and thought that I had never seen her look so beautiful. Her hair was loose around her face and flowed down her back in gentle waves. Her eyes were shining and her cheeks were slightly flushed and I wondered briefly if she was tipsy. She was wearing an almost opaque white blouse that skimmed her curves and promised to be see-through in the right light. She met my intense gaze briefly before she flicked her eyes away and I remembered unhappily that we were just friends.

"Happy birthday, Arizona." I smiled.

I set my drink down on the table and held up the bag with her gift but didn't offer to pass it across the table with the plan that she would have to stand up so I would get the opportunity to kiss her on the cheek. Bella caught her bottom lip in her teeth and frowned slightly before she nudged Emmett to let her out of the booth. Emmett passed the nudge on to Rosalie who stood up from the end of the curved bench seat and let Emmett and then Bella out of the booth. Alice and Angela quickly followed Bella out of the booth and made their way giggling with Rosalie towards the sign to the ladies restroom.

I smiled crookedly down into Bella's eyes as she stepped in front of me and then offered her the gift shop bag. She flashed me a small smile and hesitantly reached for the bag. I grabbed my opportunity and pressed a quick, chaste kiss on her cheek before I stepped back slightly so I didn't crowd her or make her feel claustrophobic. I smiled into her startled gaze and wanted to kiss her on her beautiful lips.

"Happy birthday." I repeated to explain my peck on her cheek.

"Thanks, you really shouldn't have." Bella mumbled.

She peeked into the bag and then smiled up at me with a soft laugh and I knew she was a little tipsy when I saw that her pupils were slightly dilated.

"Cheesy matching t-shirts?" She asked me teasingly.

"Cool matching t-shirts, Arizona." I corrected her mock sternly. "We can wear them for coffee, sightseeing, dinner, anything." I quickly assured her.

She nodded happily and then leaned up to kiss me back on the cheek. I clasped her waist lightly with one hand to steady her and then quickly turned my head at the last second so that her kiss landed on the corner of my mouth. I laughed lightly at her obviously feigned gasp of outrage and squeezed her waist before I shifted back again to give her space. Bella turned around to the booth to show off her birthday t-shirts to Ben and Alice chose that moment to fall heavily against my back and bump me into Bella. I instinctively grabbed Bella's hips to stop her falling forward and then glared over my shoulder at Alice. She giggled at me and then pointed down at her treacherously high heels. I shook my head exasperatedly at her and then turned back to Bella.

"Arizona, did you get my little sister drunk?" I murmured close to Bella's ear without releasing my hold on her hips.

"And your big brother, bro." Emmett laughed at my side.

I looked at him in surprise and saw all the signs of my big brother being smashed, one, he was standing too close, two, he had a high flush over his cheekbones and, three, his blue eyes looked darker with his dilated pupils. I huffed a laugh and opened and closed my fingers on her hips when Bella smiled innocently at me over her shoulder.

"Would I do that, Edward?" She purred.

I raised one eyebrow challengingly and her smile turned into a smirk and I realized that Bella was a lot tipsy when she rocked her ass back against my groin. I tightened my grip on her hips to hold her still and flicked my startled eyes across to Jasper when I heard him muffle a cough over his laugh. He flashed me a sideways, amused look and then returned his attention to Alice who had just started to try to climb over his lap to get back into the booth.

"Edward, more drinks for you, me and Ben, stat!" Jasper laughed. "We have a lot of catching up to do."

I released one hand from Bella's hip and quickly untucked my shirt so that the whole bar couldn't see the huge wood I was now sporting thanks to Bella's provocative action and my continuing obsession with the meaning of her tattoo. I decided that if Bella wanted to play tonight then I'd be her willing partner and give back as good as I got. I caught Emmett's eye and jerked my head towards the bar so he could help me carry back my round of drinks for the whole table and then frowned when he grinned and shook his head.

"Just hold up your glass, bro. They'll bring another round over." He assured me.

"Huh?" I asked cleverly as I tried not to think about my tenting trousers just a fraction of an inch away from Bella's inked ass.

"The girls were getting hassled when they went up to the bar." Emmett explained. "Bella asked if the bartender could look out for us tonight while I encouraged the sleazes to leave." He shrugged.

"Um, okay…" I muttered and returned my hand to Bella's hip because she hadn't moved away.

Ben, Jasper and Alice promptly turned and held up their glasses until they had caught the bartender's notice and Alice flashed him a flirty smile and cheeky wave across the room. I laughed softly and winked at Jasper when he looked away from smiling affectionately at Alice.

"So, what did you learn, Edward?" Jasper asked meaningfully.

"Oh, before I forget, I made reservations for tomorrow night's dinner at the Chinese restaurant across the road from here." I told everyone quickly to try and distract Jasper from asking about Bella's tattoo.

"Why?" Alice asked curiously.

"Just for a change." I shrugged lightly.

"So, what did you learn, Edward?" Jasper repeated doggedly.

I narrowed my eyes at him and shook my head minutely to tell him to drop the conversation and I groaned quietly when I saw his eyes light up and immediately focus on Bella who was looking back at me quizzically over her shoulder.

"Learn about what?" Alice asked and beat Bella to the question by a fraction of a second.

I got lost staring at Bella's lips that she'd parted slightly to start her question before I wrenched my eyes away to stop myself doing something foolish like kissing her in front of everyone.

"Edward was researching the meaning of some kanji characters." Ben mumbled uncomfortably.

I felt Bella stiffen in front of me and met her eyes quickly while I ran my hands up to her waist and squeezed her reassuringly. I smiled gently into her worried eyes and felt her soft sigh even as I heard Jasper's disgusted snort. I shot my eyes up to meet his and again shook my head minutely to tell him to let the topic go.

"Bella, what does your tattoo mean?" Jasper asked while he stared back challengingly at me.

"Oh, that! Live long and prosper." Alice said airily. "Bella told me when I asked one night when we were getting changed."

Emmett had finally sat back down in the booth and so Bella was the only one who heard my soft snort of laughter. She flashed a warning glance at me over her shoulder and I grinned cheekily into her narrowed eyes.

"Is that right, Bella?" Jasper asked unconcernedly and I knew he'd caught the shared moment between me and Bella.

"Yep." Bella said without looking away from my eyes. "For, like, when I have to turn the other cheek…" She joked lightly.

"Edward?" Jasper asked suspiciously.

I dragged my gaze away from Bella's mesmerizing eyes and shrugged lightly as I met his own narrowed eyes.

"Yep." I copied Bella's affirmation. "The old, very wise lady said it meant longevity and prosperity… that works." I lied smoothly.

I cleared my throat over my laugh when I met Bella's assessing look over her shoulder and knew she'd picked up on my slight emphasis on the wise part of my lie. I gently brushed my hand over where I knew her tattoo was under her jeans as I released her waist and stepped around her to get my drink and then smiled as innocently as she had earlier when I heard her shocked gasp.

I slugged back my scotch as I saw one of the bartenders approaching with a fully loaded tray and then pulled up an empty chair from a nearby table so I didn't have to squash into the already crowded booth. I sat down after the bartender had unloaded our drinks and then patted my knee invitingly when I noticed Bella was still standing with her hip propped against the side of the booth next to Emmett. Bella smiled briefly and shook her head slightly before she turned back to listen to Angela telling Ben and Jasper about their visit to the Science Fiction Museum. I dragged my eyes down from Bella's profile and met Emmett's happy, drunken smile.

"Em, how did you get here and get smashed in the fifteen minutes after I texted you?" I asked lightly.

"I've been with the girls all afternoon. Bella made me an honorary chick so I could join them for girl time." He shrugged.

I huffed out a surprised laugh and flashed a glance up at Bella who was smiling easily down at Emmett. I raised an eyebrow questioningly at Emmett and he grinned happily and then sipped his drink.

"I wanted to do the circus thing." He said with another shrug.

"You went to the circus?" I asked curiously.

"Circus school." Bella corrected me quietly. "We had a go on the trapeze… Emmett rocked it." She smiled at Emmett.

"Yeah, I did." Emmett said proudly.

I frowned slightly between Bella and Emmett because their explanation didn't actually tell me much. Emmett grinned and then nudged Rosalie and flicked his fingers at her purse. Rosalie looked over at me briefly and then pulled a sheaf of small cardboard folders out of her purse and handed them to me before she returned to listening to Angela.

I curiously opened the first folder and saw a five by seven inch photograph of Emmett swinging on a trapeze high over a huge net. I flashed a shocked look up at Emmett and smiled wonderingly before I quickly started to flick through the rest of the folders. One photo showed Rosalie and Emmett both hanging from their knees on two trapezes and swinging towards each other with their hands outstretched on their bisecting arcs. The next shot showed Emmett gripping Rosalie's forearms as she swung beneath him and had captured both of them smiling triumphantly into each other's eyes.

"Awesome." I breathed.

I grinned up at Emmett when I heard his puff of laughter and met his proud smile with an amazed expression. I smiled across at Rosalie who was now smiling widely back at me and then flashed a look at Bella who was smiling down at her feet. I looked more closely at the second shot where Emmett was hanging upside down by his knees and swinging Rosalie beneath him and saw that he wasn't wearing his knee brace. I moved onto the next folder that held a photo of Bella, Angela and Alice sitting on the trapeze together and smiling at the camera.

I stood up and passed the folder across to Jasper who took it uncertainly and then stared at it with an open mouth after he'd looked inside at the photograph. Alice giggled when Jasper shot her a surprised look and then impatiently motioned at me to pass over the next folder. I looked at it quickly and then handed the shot of Alice swinging upside down from her knees with her arms outstretched to be caught by an unknown guy to Jasper. Jasper looked at my little sister in awe after he'd glanced at the photo and then bent his head over to examine the shot more carefully. I passed the next shot of Angela in almost the identical pose as Alice to Ben and then opened up the next folder. The folder contained a photo of Bella in mid air as she swung from the same strange guy's forearms and I looked at it closely before I flashed a smile at Bella.

"You look terrified, Arizona." I murmured before I bent my head down to look at the photo again.

"I was terrified." Bella admitted easily. "I hated every minute of it until I swung down off the net… Then it was okay, I guess." She shrugged.

I frowned slightly as I looked back up at her and she smiled ruefully before she picked up her cocktail and sipped from the straw.

"I'm scared of heights." She confessed sheepishly. "But a birthday resolution is a birthday resolution and so I had to do it." She said firmly.

"Um, birthday resolution?" I asked and was confused all over again.

"Bella and Angela have a tradition where, each birthday, they make resolutions that they have to make come true before the next year." Emmett explained for Bella.

"Like birthday wishes? Or, New Year's resolutions?" I asked uncertainly.

"Exactly." Bella confirmed. "A combination of both… Birthday wishes are just wishes, like something you sit back and think would be nice but don't have to do anything about… And no one keeps their New Year's resolutions… And so we came up with birthday resolutions." She rambled while gesturing with her glass.

I nodded seriously and bit the inside of my cheek so I wouldn't smile at Bella's tipsy explanation. I carefully shuffled the photo folders into a neat stack and then added the three that Ben passed back to me and handed them to Rosalie before I sat down again. I froze when Bella straightened from leaning against the booth and stepped over to me before she perched lightly on my knee. She flashed an apologetic smile back at me and then twisted and leaned towards my ear and I automatically moved my hand to her waist as she bent close.

"Sorry, my legs are tired." She whispered.

I pulled my head back slightly and smiled into her eyes before I used the excuse of reaching forward to get my drink to resettle her weight on my lap so she would be more comfortable.

"I like it… plus, I did offer." I murmured with an easy shrug.

Bella smiled widely and then twisted back to listen to Alice chatter excitedly about their circus school experience. I kept my hand lightly clasping Bella's waist and then smiled slightly when I caught Emmett grinning happily at me and Bella together. I glanced away from staring at Bella's hair when the bartender arrived with another round of drinks and quickly finished my drink so he could take my glass when he started to clear the table of two rounds worth of empty glasses. I felt my cheeks get hot as the effects of three double scotches in close succession started to hit me and decided I needed to eat before I ended up as smashed as Emmett.

"Food?" I suggested to Emmett quietly.

He nodded urgently and I laughed lightly before I leaned my mouth forward next to Bella's ear.

"Em and I are going to order some food. You're going to have to let me up." I murmured softly.

Bella nodded easily but didn't make a move to stand and I laughed quietly after a short wait. Bella smiled cheekily over her shoulder before she turned back to listen to the girls conversation.

"Arizona, do I need to ask louder?... or faster?... or harder?" I joked in a silky murmur.

Bella shot to her feet and turned on me with her hands on her hips and then opened her mouth to start to tell me off. I rose fluidly and was deliberately standing too close as I smiled crookedly down into her outraged eyes. Bella snapped her mouth shut and met my intense gaze with softened eyes and I felt my smile start to fade as the heavy awareness between us built.

"C'mon, little bro, I need food." Emmett grumbled from, again, too close to my side.

"Okay, Em." I sighed as I tore my eyes away from Bella and lightly brushed her hand with my fingertips.

Bella stepped to take Emmett's seat at the edge of the booth next to Rosalie and sank down on the bench without looking at me again. I winced as Emmett clapped me on the back and remembered that he always forgot what a strong, intimidating guy he was when he was drinking. I followed him up to the bar and then stood beside him as we looked through the bar menu and argued about what to order for our table. We both got another drink because we'd left ours back at the table and were happily descending into our usual brotherly bickering when Emmett flinched violently. He spun to face two busty blondes who I realized were standing closer than the scrum at the bar demanded.

"You goosed me." He accused both of the bottle blondes.

"My bad." The taller blonde shrugged and then simpered at Emmett. "Would you like to buy me a drink to make up for it?"

"No." Rosalie answered for Emmett from behind the two girls. "Excuse me." She said pointedly before stepping to his side.

She turned to start reading the menu with Emmett but placed her hand possessively on his ass when he turned back to the bar. I smiled delightedly when Bella slipped between the two blondes and casually stepped around me to read the menu with Rosalie and Emmett. I slipped my arm around her waist and stood close behind her as I pretended to look at the menu but was really lost in the smell of her hair and the feel of my forearm against her stomach through her silky top.

"Thank you for rescuing me, Arizona." I murmured quietly.

Bella shrugged too casually and kept her head bent over the menu.

"Do you know what you want, Edward?" Rosalie asked me over Emmett's shoulder.

"Yes." I answered simply and wasn't talking about food.

"I'm still deciding." Bella mumbled and I knew she wasn't talking about food either.

I frowned slightly as I looked at Bella's bent profile as she chewed her lip while she read the menu.

"The chicken would be good." I tried to joke.

Bella huffed a laugh and I grabbed her hip with my other hand to hold her away from my body when her small movement bumped her shoulders into my chest and brushed her jeans against my hips.

"You don't think it would give me indigestion?" Bella asked nonchalantly as she frowned at the menu.

"Heartburn is always a risk, Arizona." I murmured softly. "… But you'll be fine with this chicken." I added so only she would hear.

"Which chicken dish? There's, like, five of them." Emmett asked exasperatedly.

"The buffalo wings." Bella told him quickly.

"Oh… they're hot." Emmett warned.

"Yes, they are." Bella nodded seriously.

I laughed delightedly and met Bella's quick smile over her shoulder with a cheeky grin. Bella huffed a laugh and turned back to pretend to read the menu.

"So, have you decided already?" Emmett whined.

"Yep." Bella answered. "… I'll try the chicken." She added after a pause where my heart didn't beat and my lungs didn't expand.

I inhaled a shaky breath and squeezed Bella's hip gently but she kept her head turned towards Emmett and Rosalie.

"So… burgers for everyone, four baskets of fries and wings." Rosalie listed.

"Yeah!" Emmett breathed and excitedly rubbed his hands together.

Rosalie turned to catch the bartender's attention and I leaned forward to place my mouth next to Bella's ear.

"I won't let you regret your decision." I murmured huskily.

"You better not." Bella warned sternly.

I smiled as I realized I liked this forthright Bella and then got hit with another blinding revelation. Her tattoo, along with its wicked, delightful double meaning, was how she wanted to live her life. Bella wanted to be harder, faster and louder. I decided to test my theory and ask her about it but she was already starting to turn in my hold with Emmett and Rosalie to head back to the table. I tightened my grip on her slightly and smiled into her questioning frown.

"Stay awhile, Arizona?" I asked softly.

Bella shook her head but took away the sting of her refusal with a quick smile.

"I'm heading for the jukebox." She explained.

I nodded quickly and released my hold around her body but placed my hand on her lower back.

"I'll be right by your side." I told her quietly and wasn't talking about walking with her to the jukebox.

I smiled innocently into her quick look and followed her closely through the crowd pressing forward to the bar. I stepped forward to her side as soon as we were clear of the swarm of people and smiled easily into her careful eyes.

"Will you tell me about the time when you felt too soft, too slow and too quiet?" I asked diffidently.

Bella stopped abruptly and I quickly swung around to face her after I'd taken one step before I'd realized she had stopped. I met her shocked eyes seriously and waited for her to decide if she wanted to answer or wanted to tell me to mind my own business. I knew by her reaction that I had interpreted her tattoo correctly and quirked a small smile at her before I stepped back to her side and nudged her gently with my hand on the small of her back. She flashed a quick smile at me and then started walking again and I matched my stride to hers as we weaved around the tables to the jukebox.

I leaned against the side of the jukebox and watched Bella as she concentrated while flicking through the songs and then pushed myself up quickly when she pushed her hand into her pocket.

"I'll pay." I offered quickly.

Bella shook her head with a smile and pulled out a large fold of one dollar bills and started feeding her money into the jukebox.

"Angela and I come prepared." She explained with a smile at my startled look.

"You look like you're prepared to head out to strip club." I said with a chuckle.

"Been there, done that… Eh." Bella shrugged dismissively.

I laughed and stepped close to her side because I couldn't resist being near her and watched quietly as she chose her songs. I flashed a look at her profile and decided I had to ask the question that was rolling around with the four double scotches in my empty stomach.

"What changed?" I blurted out. "Between yesterday and now?" I added hurriedly.

I saw Bella frown slightly and realized I had pushed her too far and so tried to backpedal with a joke.

"It's just that, you know, a guy has to watch out for girls taking wanton advantage of him." I said with a light shrug. "You know, getting him drunk and dragging him back home and then never calling again." I tried to pout.

Bella scoffed a laugh and flashed me a wide smile before she frowned back at the jukebox as she selected another song. I waited for her to say something, anything, and concentrated on not shifting my feet uneasily like a nervous schoolboy. Bella finished choosing her songs and then turned to face me and leaned her hip against the jukebox.

"Alice and Rosalie." She said cryptically.

"Alice and Rosalie?" I repeated stupidly.

"Yep." Bella confirmed lightly. "I was watching Rosalie on the trapeze with Emmett and I could see that Emmett was freaking out about letting her fall, probably because of his knee… But Rosalie just trusted him not to let her down and he didn't… She didn't let him see that she was also nervous and it was okay." She explained and was again using her hands as she talked.

I nodded seriously and mimicked Bella's posture against the jukebox by propping my hip carefully against the glass.

"And Alice?" I asked softly.

"Yeah, um, Alice was telling me about how she got together with Jasper when we were getting manicures… Jasper was a real slut." Bella accused me indignantly.

I quirked a smile and nodded my agreement that Jasper had been a man-whore during college and his early twenties.

"So, anyway, Alice told me that she was really scared that Jasper was just feeding her lines when they first started dating." Bella flicked me an uneasy look. "This is girl talk, Edward, and so you're not allowed to say I said anything." She warned.

I nodded quickly and picked up her hand and squeezed it reassuringly because I needed to know why she seemed willing to give me another chance tonight. Bella smiled slightly and then dropped her head to look at our entwined fingers.

"So, I asked Alice what let her know that Jasper wanted to and was able to change and she said that she just had to trust him… She said she could see it in the small gestures he made and in his eyes but, ultimately, she just had to trust that he wanted to be with her." Bella mumbled and I could tell she was uncomfortable because she wasn't waving her free hand around as she talked.

I smiled down at our hands and smoothed my thumb across the back of Bella's hand before I decided to lighten the intense moment while also raising the small doubt I had in the back of my mind.

"So, it's not just the cocktails that are making you want to tap my fine ass?" I joked with Felix's teasing at the zoo.

"There's probably a bit of that in the mix, too." Bella shrugged easily. "You do have a very nice ass." She laughed and then waggled her eyebrows at me.

I laughed in surprise and then tugged her back to me when she giggled and spun to head back to the table. I was suddenly serious and met her dancing eyes intently before I dropped my eyes to stare at her small hand clasped in my fingers.

"I did you a disservice by saying you walk away, Bella." I apologized quietly. "I realized that you're not walking away and leaving things unfinished behind you… You're moving on… I'm the one that was always stuck standing still." I tried to put into words what I knew in my head.

I flashed my eyes up to meet her, now, steady gaze and smiled slightly at her tiny shrug.

"I can see that I sometimes make a quick, low key exit… No one has ever expected me to wait around, I've gotten used to just being able to slip away without making a fuss." She admitted softly.

"I don't want you to slip away from me without making a fuss." I told our entwined fingers. "If I've done something wrong I want you to rail and scream and tear into me… I want you to tell me to man the fuck up." I said and held her eyes intently.

Bella nodded slowly and then I saw sudden amusement dance into her eyes and she smiled widely.

"So, Edward Cullen gets philosophical when he drinks." She teased lightly.

I pushed off the jukebox and squeezed her hand as I started to lead her back to the table.

"Only for the first couple." I admitted over my shoulder. "The horniness kicks in after the next few." I added with a cheeky grin.

Bella laughed softly and then danced around me as approached our table.

"Someone get this man a drink, stat." She joked loudly and used Jasper's stupid word from earlier.

I huffed a laugh and tried to snag her back to my side but she lightly evaded my reaching hands and sat abruptly on Emmett's knee.

"Was he talking about the stock market again?" Emmett asked her sympathetically.

"It's just another form of gambling." I pretended to start my lecture.

"We were talking about gambling." Bella seemingly agreed with Emmett lightly and flashed me a smile.

I sank down on my chair and then gulped when I saw I had four scotches lined up in front of my seat. I frowned across at Alice and Jasper and met Jasper's already slightly inebriated grin.

"Jazz, I can't get smashed tonight." I told him seriously.

I heard Bella snicker softly and flashed her a quick look and then narrowed my eyes at her when I caught her too innocent smile. She dropped her eyes down to the table with another soft laugh and I ran my hand through my hair when I realized I was going to have a hard time doing the right thing and not taking Bella home with me at the end of the night.

"Why not, dude?" Jasper drawled.

"Because he's afraid that I'm going to have my wicked way with him and not respect him in the morning." Bella joked.

Jasper looked at me in surprise and I shook my head even as I laughed.

"I have to drive down to Tacoma in the morning, remember? I told you about it." I reminded him quickly.

"What's in Tacoma?" Rosalie asked curiously.

"Crystals, incense, tie dye, hippies." I muttered.

Jasper looked at me in shock and I nodded slightly even as I grimaced.

"Dude…" Jasper breathed and sounded happy and impressed.

He stood up and leaned across the table and grabbed two of my queued up scotches and set them next to his bourbon before he reached across for the third glass and placed it in front of Ben. I glanced around and saw the whole table was staring between me and Jasper and waiting for an explanation.

"Emmett got a manicure." I told Jasper hurriedly as I saw Alice open her mouth to ask for more details.

"Dude…" Jasper exhaled and sounded unhappy and disappointed.

I relaxed back in my seat as Ben and Jasper immediately pounced on Emmett's metrosexual tendencies and Emmett started to defend the importance of looking after your hands. I picked up my last drink for the night before I switched to water and raised it cheekily at Bella in a silent toast and then laughed at her tiny pout. She smiled quickly and then stood up abruptly and turned to Alice.

"Alice, I am now going to the bathroom." She said formally.

Alice giggled and then immediately started to climb out of the booth over Jasper and Rosalie nudged Emmett to get him to let her out of their side. I frowned as Angela slid out of the booth behind Rosalie and then all four girls started to walk towards the ladies toilets.

"What was that about?" I asked Emmett in confusion.

"Alice told Bella off earlier for going to the ladies without telling her… in case she needed to go too." Emmett explained. "I told you Bella didn't go to the bathroom in pairs." He added with a laugh.

I laughed quietly and then sipped my scotch as I relaxed back and thought about my unexpected good change of fortune with Bella tonight. I sipped my scotch and tried to steel my resolve not to fall into bed with her when she was tipsy and might regret what we'd done in the morning. I sipped my scotch and tried not to think about how desperately I wanted to fall into bed with her when she was tipsy and in this playful, flirtatious mood. I sipped the last of my scotch and needed another drink.


End file.
